24 answers

Grandmother Seeking Advice

My 12 year old granddaughter pulls out her eyelashes. We have done everything we could to stop her. What would make her do this. If she keeps it up will they stop coming back? She has long lashes and says they get in her way, they are not that long.

What can I do next?

Featured Answers

Hi,

I use to do the same thing when I was younger and it drove my mom crazy. I'm now 45 and I still pull them sometime, but YES they do grow back.

3 moms found this helpful

My oldest daughter started little habits like that about the same age (pulling at eyelashes, tearing off split ends of her hair) and I did not know what to do. I finally took her to a salon where a friend works and they referred her to a sweet stylist who was young enough for the tweens and teens to look up to (and listen to.) I spoke with the stylist before hand about the issues but not in front of my daughter. She talked with her as she styled her hair and also gave her great advice about washing her face and other upkeep ideas....all the while making my daughter feel like a sophisticated grown-up. It did the trick!

p.s. At the time, my daughter was experiencing some peer anxiety on her cheerleading squad. She would not go to a school counselor or any other counselor. I was very thankful she was able to express herself with a grown up I trusted.

S., sorry to say, I am 37 and have been pulling out my lashes as well!! I wear contacts and used to have problems with lashes getting into my eyes and having to remove the contacts because of it. Anyone that wears contacts knows what a pain that is. I have been doing it for at least 2 years now. My fiance always points out that I don't have many, and he has really long lashes. I want him to pull his as well. They do grow back. Bad habit I guess. Wish you well

More Answers

Hi,

I use to do the same thing when I was younger and it drove my mom crazy. I'm now 45 and I still pull them sometime, but YES they do grow back.

3 moms found this helpful

Hi. Your granddaughter may have trichotillomania. It is an impulse disorder causing people to pull out eyelashes, hair from the scalp, or eyebrows. They have a website with more information on the topic- www.trich.org. (http://www.trich.org.) Good luck!

2 moms found this helpful

There is an article about this on Wikipedia.org. It is called Trichotillomania. I suggest you research this as well as call her pediatrician, and give her lots of love and support and work to minimize stress in her life. She is not doing it on purpose. Good luck.

2 moms found this helpful

It might be some sort of insecurity at school. I had problem like that when I was in school and it was because I was insecure and felt alone. It was a way to get out my fustration. Just love her and let her know how special she is and try to see if she is hurting inside or not, I will pray for her, and I turned out ok, and yes they do grow back:)

1 mom found this helpful

Hi S.,

I saw a talk show that can relate to this issue. It was about kids with disorders called o.d.d (I think), one of the stories was of a girl who pulled her hair until bold, every time she was nervous or anxious she react like this. I know it may sound silly but u should take her to a doctor and maybe they could be more helpful.

1 mom found this helpful

Oh my dear... have you quietly spoken to the child about any fears or worries she might have? I'd get the little girl alone and talk to her with all the love in your voice that you can muster. BE there for her -- maybe she wants someone to talk to.

Otherwise, I would recommend that your granddaughter's family go to counseling, or at least the child should have counseling alone -- with a child psychologist (there are good ones in the Atlanta area, Roswell, etc.) A friend's daughter in Florida had a similar problem. She pulled her hair out to the point that she was bald in huge patches around her head. It was a way to cope with stress and the family was successful in helping the child to stop the behavior once they all went to counseling sessions. It's a more common problem than you'd realize.

LATER... I consulted with Angie Claussen, PhD in child development. Here is her response:
Without knowing more, I would suggest that the child be evaluated. It could be a sign of a deeper problem, anxiety or obsession. Of course it could also be just one of those weird things kids do, and then do a lot because they get attention and/or want to exercise control over their own body and fate. Teens get really weird ideas in their head sometimes that seem perfectly normal to them.
But unless it's very clear that the child is very healthy and well adjusted in all other aspects, it'd be safer to have her checked out.
Angie

-----Original Message-----
From: Latham, B. (CDC/CCHP/NCCDPHP)
Sent: Tuesday, February 26, 2008 11:27 AM
To: Claussen, Angelika (CDC/CCHP/NCBDDD)
Subject: I wanted you to see this: Grandmother seeking advice

B. L <____@____.com> sent you the following information from Mamasource.

Angela... what would you tell this grandmother?

My mother has done this for most of her life. She would give us the excuse that they "itched" or bothered her, but her doctor said that it had to do with her way of dealing with nerves and anxiety. When they treated her with anti-anxiety medication, she stopped pulling them out and some did grow back. But, since she has stopped the medication, she started pulling out her eyebrow hairs as well. Maybe you can take her to the doctor to see if she is dealing with some anxieties, etc. before it gets to that point.

I have read the other posts and think this is a nervous reaction also. Take her to a doctor so that she can be properly dianosed and treated. Good luck!

Required Fields

Our records show that we already have a Mamapedia or Mamasource account created for you under the email address you entered.

Please enter your Mamapedia or Mamasource password to continue signing in.

Required Fields

, you’re almost done...

Since this is the first time you are logging in to Mamapedia with Facebook Connect, please provide the following information so you can participate in the Mamapedia community.

As a member, you’ll receive optional email newsletters and community updates sent to you from Mamapedia, and your email address will never be shared with third parties.

By clicking "Continue to Mamapedia", I agree to the Mamapedia Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy.