Godparents - Dupo,IL

Not sure of your religion would have certain rules. However, from my experience, Godparents do not have to be married or even family members. My godparents are my mother's brother and my dad's sister (NOT married to each other). I have known good friends be Godparents be for other friend's kids.

In a relious aspect, the role of the Godparent is to ensure the religious life of the child if the parents are no longer capable to do that. A family member is good to fulfill that role since they usually have the same religion.

Good Morning D., I don't think there is any cut in stone rules for God Parents. Ours were a couple from Church, they really didn't do anything. They were our Sunday School teachers great people. Only thing they did was have their picture taken with us when the boys were dedicated.

You can choose anyone you wish to. Are you still friends with the x sister in law? If they have children then really she is still a part of the family. Distant but family.
I adore my brother in laws former wife, she is a wonderful, caring, kind, loving lady. We still consider her family.

We went on a trip in 1980, left our sons with my brother and sister in law. We had our will drawn up and gave custody to them if anything should happen to us. Our sons are 35 & 33. Every once in a while we remind my brother he still gets the boys if we kick off...lol Nope our attorney skipped town long time ago and we have no idea where the original Will is....lol He pleads with us to get it Up dated and laughs..

God Bless you on your Quest
K. Nana of 5

I am Godmother to my niece and nephew and the Godfather is a good friend of their family. I do not think it has to be a couple. I think originally Godparents were the people you would leave your children with if something unfortunate happened and you were to pass away. However, I think nowadays people view Godparents more as the people they want to help teach their children and bring them closer to God. I think it just depends on how you view this role as to who you should give this wonderful responsibility to. Good luck!

okay, godparents do not have to be married. My oldest son has two godmothers & no godfathers. Our priest was totally okay with that.

I am godmother to my 1st cousin (I'm 34 years older). He also has 5 godfathers! How's that for crazy?

As for your ex-SIL, you're all adults....why do you have to choose between your brother & his ex? Why can't she still function as godmother? Even if she's no longer in the family, she may still feel a bond with your daughter. I guess what I'm saying is: why do you feel the need to remove this honor from your ex-SIL? I'd bet that your daughter will still receive the same upbringing regardless of whether or not your ex-SIL was in the picture. Peace!

i think it probably depends on your family/church traditions. i think everyone's are different. in my family many of us had couples as godparents, but some had one person on mom's side, and one person on dad's side of the family, so it's just what you prefer. but lots of us had godparents who were married, and most of them have divorced now. it was really never that big of a deal, "blood is thicker than water" and all. we just "kept" the godparent that was blood, and for the most part the other godparent pretty much was gone. we believe that the godparent is sort of supposed to be a spiritual guide as well as sort of a S. parent. i don't think you "replace" one just because that person chooses to leave the relationship. because in reality that person could have chosen to continue godparent "duties" if they had wanted to. almost all of my generation in my family have "lost" a godparent and we really didn't spend much time worrying about it. your brother can still be a great godfather to your daughter, and what exactly is he doing that requires a S. person "has" to be designated? there are no strict rules (at least in our family). do what makes you feel comfortable. but don't put unnecessary pressure on yourself or your family because of your brother's divorce. it really is none of your business. unfortunately it will affect you, but try not to let it.

I have 3 kids and two of them have 3 godparents, so they do not have to be a couple. Each of the two have a married couple and an extra godparent. This is due to my brother not being married yet and I really wanted him a godparent of one of my children. My husband comes from a huge family so looking outside of the family for godparents was pretty much out of the question but I really wanted my best friend to be a godparent to one of my children as we are godparents to one of her children. So we have one of his brothers and my best friend as godparents as well. I really think it is your preference and what works best for your family. It used to be thought of as who your godparents were, were who you would go to if your parents died. Not the case any longer...hope that helps!

My mom chose my aunt and uncle(her sibings) and obviously they weren't married. Depending on if this is a religious role model, in my church(catholic) they ask that they be 18 and confirmed. But if it's just a matter of selecting who's going to care for your child(is this in your will?) then I wouldn't worry much about if they are married etc... as long as they can provide a future and life for your child and be responsible enough to lead the life you want your child to grow up with. Hope this helps

Considering that MY parents are divorced, I can tell you from the childrens point of view that you need to have Godparents that you can trust with your children. If something had happened to you and your husband a year ago, would you like for your children to be going though the divorce with your brother? It is not a good situation. It is my opinion (for what it is worth) that you should choose Godparents that you are confident will not divorce, who will be caring for eachothers needs before any others, and then caring for your children (and their own, if that is the case)next. No child should ever have to go through a divorce.

I have a Godchild and I'm not related or married to the Godfather!! In fact, where they go to church (which is Catholic), they said that I just have to show a certificate that I was baptized as Catholic and they know I'm not a practicing Catholic anymore. But the Godfather is a practicing Catholic. They said that as long as one Godparent was still in the church, that's all that mattered. But every church is different, but the Godparents don't need to be married to each other. In fact, my Godfather is my uncle (my mom's youngest brother) and my Godmother is my mom's friend from childhood.

Hi D....

This is an interesting post because this is the exact same thing happening with my daughter's god parents, so I know what you're going through. It's tough. But, your daughter is 4 and so she's probably come to know your ex-SIL very well and she probably has questions herself. I'm not sure why you feel the need to replace her. It's okay if your daughter just has one god parent. If your brother gets remarried in the future then maybe you can look more into it then, but I'd say let him fly solo as her God parent for now.

My daughter's godparents are NOT a couple - they are my best girl friend and husband's best guy friend. But godparents for her are NOT her guardians. Those are my parents. For us, godparents are people who have a positive impact on our daughter's life and in the event that she wants to discuss religion with someone other than us, she can go to them and they will teach her what they know.

No my sister and my brother in law are my son's godparents but my sister and her husband are my daughter's grandparents it's whoever you feel will best care for you children when something happens to you and your husband.

HI D. I was just asking myself this question. No the "Godparents" do not have to be a couple. Recently my 2 older childrens "Godparents" split, I am friends with both and they are the ones who brought God into mylife so it is fitting for them to be the ones to assist in brining God into my kids life. I now have a third and will ask each of them to continue being the "Godparent" Hope that helps or puts your situation into perspective.
Also depending on how long they were married...why is she no longer part of your family just bc she and your brother are no longer together. I think the two should/could be separate.

It is okay to have different godparents. Remember that the godparents are to help with the child's faith formation. If the godparents are not helping it may be time to pick new ones.

I don't know if there is a protocol or not, but I have an aunt as my godmother (dad's sister), and my godfather is an uncle (my mom's brother). So I don't think there is a hard and fast rule.

None of my kids have godparents who are married and I am not the godmother to my husbands godchild. The godparents are the people you choice to help raise your child in a faithful way. They can be anyone you want them to be. For instance my oldest sons godparents are my brother and sister.

Godparents do not have to be a couple.

Godparents don't have to be a couple. However, I'm not sure if you can just "change" the godparents. Are you Catholic? I don't know how you'd change you child's baptismal certificate. I think the title of godparent is just that...a title. I guess the "idea" is that if something happens to the child's parents, then they would be raised by the godparents. But, my children have different godparents and I wouldn't want them separated. So, we have custody specifically addressed in our wills.

My daughter had 4 godfathers and 1 godmother. It isn't a legally binding thing so don't worry about it.