God Jff

Take comfort that G-d did hear you and that in and of itself is help. Lack of an immediate "answer" lets you play a role.

Sometimes disappointment can lead you on another path, be it emotional, physical or spiritual.

I also like the adage of G-d helps those who helps themselves. I'm not saying this is the case with you, but that has helped me immensely.

In all of my 41 years of life I have always known on some level that God walked with me. It wasn't until a decade ago that I realized how he leads. Sometimes he sees the dreams and passions in my heart and leads me toward them. More often he places opportunities quietly at my feet to discover on my own. Most often I realize my blessings in hindsight.
Ten years ago, I met the man of my dreams and I wanted to marry him. My life was seemingly perfect, but he abruptly broke things off after dating for a year. I was devastated. It was the beginning of a series of events that ultimately led me to moving out of state. 6 months later I met my husband to be. I now have two kids and life is so different in so many wonderful ways. It was during that time of utter heartbreak and struggle that I turned to God and had faith that somehow all of this would turn out for the best. And it has. I love the following saying: God has three answers for all prayers: yes. Not yet. and I have something better in mind. When opportunities come my way now, I try to look at them with an open mind. Even if it is something that I am not too jazzed about, I do it anyway and am usually stunned by the blessings that unfold because of it. Let God lead you and you will be amazed at where he takes you!
God Bless,
A.

IMHO......

Disappointment comes from not having your expectation met. But why is it YOUR expectation that is most important?

I believe in God, but more in the "higher power" sense. I am able to merge several differing philosophies and they all seem to make sense to me. My beliefs may differ a bit from yours. So, take this with a grain of salt.

I watched a documentary when I was in High School that touched me deeply. It had something to do with making sure that you prayed "the RIGHT prayer". This guy had done a prayer study with plants. He separated them into 3 categories (I'm 40 now, so I'm paraphrasing).

1. Control group. No prayers were said about these plants.
2. "Please help these plants grow big and healthy"
3. "I trust that what will happen to these plants is what is supposed to happen".

Interesting results.

Group #3 plants flourished. These plants were noticeably larger, grew faster and had better color.
This was the group in which the "result" was left up to God / Higher Power / The Universe... whatever you believe in.

Group #1 plants grew at the rate a horticulturalist would expect. This was the group for which NO prayers were said.

Group #2 plants DID NOT GROW as well as expected. Noticeably smaller, some plants died.

Everything was the same for all three groups, except prayer. Temperature, amount of water, type of soil, type of plant etc. It was all the same except for the prayer.

The researchers intent was to prove that a specific prayer would yield positive results and the energy from multiple people praying the same prayer would impact how the plants grew. But that's not what happened. Why? Hmmmmm. It's because the prayers in Group #2 were SELFISH prayers. "let them grow big". "let us win the game" "let my child live". These are things we want. Things we think we need. BUT THEY ARE SELFISH. These prayers do not take into account the "bigger plan". They take into account OUR PLAN.

Let's stop talking about plants and cut to the chase. "Let my child live". Selfish? Surely not.

ABSOLUTELY. "Let my child live" is about what that parent wants. And OF COURSE that's what they want. Sometimes that is in direct conflict with the *plan* for the universe. "Let my child live" MAY NOT BE THE BEST COURSE OF ACTION..... in the larger picture. Hard to imagine, I know.

But that is where faith comes in. Faith is nothing more than impulse control of the mind and will over what we want. It's believing in our core that something IS or is right...... when it goes against logic.

If your faith wanes when things don't go your way..... that's not faith. That's selfishness.
And sometimes that's OK. Sometimes we have to throw a tantrum to get ourselves back on track. That's what makes us human.

Watch "What the Bleep Do We Know". It starts Marlee Matlin and basically has to do with quantum physics. It's similar to the *premise* of The Secret without all the Harry Potter mumbo-jumbo and convoluted double-circle speak.

Watch "The Adjustment Bureau" with Matt Damon and Emily Blunt.

Both deal with plans that are larger than *us* and what impacts things beyond what we can *believe* and *control*.

However..... I also like the joke about the man who lives in an area devastated by a flood. He drags himself and his family to the rooftop and prays to God to save him.

A boat comes along....
"Hop in" the captain says.
"Nope.... God will save me" the man says.
The boat floats away.... to save others.

The man continues to pray to God to save him. He believes God will save him.

A helicopter comes along....
"Catch the rope" the pilot calls down.
"Nope.... God will save me" the man says.
The helicopter flies away.... to save others.

Eventually the man and his family die. As he is dying he has one more conversation with God. "God... You ignored my prayers. I prayed for you to come and save me. You didn't save me. I have been faithful. I am a follower. Why did you not come save me?." He is angry with God.

God answers "what do you mean I ignored your prayers?" God asks. "I sent you a boat and helicopter" God says. "I answered your prayers. You didn't want to accept my help, because it wasn't in the form you expected".

I wish you luck and peace on whatever journey you are taking.

We don't always get what we want, just because we pray for it. I have been a Christian my whole life, and have had many disappointments. My husband and I are going thru something with his daughter and his ex. It is NOT going our way although we keep praying about it. We just keep telling ourselves that God knows the Big Picture and we have to believe there is some reason things are going the way they are. Although we feel like it isn't for OUR benefit, maybe its for his DAUGHTERS benefit or even his EX'S benefit (which is HARD to swallow). We don't know the "WHY", but we rest in the fact that we know WHO is in charge and there is a reason for everything. I love the saying, "I may not know what the future holds, but I know Who holds the future." So just rest in the fact although YOU may not understand, the all powerful and knowing One does. Hope that helps. Good luck!!!

God doesn't always answer and sometimes the answser is NO. I don't get disappointed because I can't see the "big" picture. He does.

A good friend of mine's daughter died last December. I did question that. She had just turned 19 and would have started college last fall. She was diagnosed with cancer the week of Prom.

She would have been the one to keep on Earth because she was such a child of God. She spread the Word and had such a love of life. She was a great young woman. I don't understand why she and her family had to go through this. During the service, it was truly amazing how many lives she touched and I realized how much she had touched mine. What a gift. I know her Mom questions this alot but her faith is large and she knows she will see her daughter again. That is faith. The absolute knowing that there is something bigger and better than us. To know that she is in a better place, pain free with her grandparents to comforting to us.

Did I ask God to spare her? Yes. Do I understand why he didn't? No. But I do know there is a plan and this was part of it.

I truly look at God as my Father. He is my parent, my perfect parent. As a parent I sometime don't give my children what they are asking for. Sometimes I want them to earn what they want or sometimes what they want really wouldn't be good for them, but they don't always see it that way. Sometime I have something even better planned for them in the future and giving them what they desire when they desire it would alter that better plan. In the end it would be much easier on all of us if my children would just trust me because I love them dearly and I really am doing the very best for them and they just don't have the experiences or knowledge to understand the plan. God is a perfect Father. He has a perfect plan. In fact he has something better than ever in store for all of us and all we need to do is just trust in him.

I will give you an example. I greatly desired to have another baby. All our children also desired to have one more baby as well. My husband was just not on the same page and getting pregnant has always been very difficult for me. We prayed and prayed for years that my husbands heart would soften and that I would be able to get pregnant quickly. Finally as an anniversary gift my husband agreed that we could have one more child. As God would have it, I became pregnant the very next month. We were all thrilled! I felt that this child may very well be our last because I really was not young and I cherished every moment of that pregnancy. In my 31 weeks of pregnancy I suddenly felt something very wrong and just wanted to hear that babies heart beat. We discovered that that she had died and I soon went into labor. She was born on Mother's Day and our hearts were broken. I really couldn't fathom how this could be God's plan but I decided to just put all my faith in him that somehow there was some kind of good to come out of this. I gave God all my tears. I gave him all the pain and I told him to accept this child as a gift and to have his Mother rock my child in heaven as I would have done on earth. I told him that this child was very special to me and that I was thankful for her very short life. I told him that he suffered here on earth and I would join him in suffering if he would give me joy and peace. I can't explain the peace I felt during that suffering and there is joy even during such great sorrow. I felt it. I asked him to give me his Mother as my help to get through this because she also buried a child. I asked Mary to take me to her Son's feel and ask him to give me hope. We went on to bury another child and I continued to pray and trust that somehow this was all going to work out for the good of his greater plan but that I really desired no more children because the pain was so great. I had buried both a daughter and a son and I just didn't think I could do it again and I felt my husband would never agree to have another child. As God would plan it, He snuck one more little one in. I had decided that I must not be healthy and had sought the help of a wonderful doctor. He discovered I had some health issues that had went undetected. We worked to correct these issues and when I discovered that I was pregnant he was able to help me to carry this little girl to full term. I know that had either one of those babies lived we would not have this little girl in our lives. I had been praying for one more child and God in his wisdom gave me three more. The children who died are just as much a gift to me as the one who lived. I love them all and would never not want any of them in my life. I thank God for all the tears and all the joys for everything I have and everything I don't. Trust in him. He has something better than ever planned.

Sometimes we think that God hasn't answered our prayer, but he has... in His own way.

I find it frustrating that someone will say that "You didn't pray hard enough... that's why you didn't get it." The type of prayer, how often, or how it is done doesn't really affect the outcome.

An answered prayer doesn't have to mean "yes" .... do you give your children ALL they ask for? Of course not... you know that some things they want aren't good for them, or it isn't what YOU want for them. I see God in that same way. (A simplistic view, perhaps, but it helps me.)

God's answer may be "No", or it may be "just wait a bit... you'll see what is going to happen".

Our timing is not necessarily God's timing.

I always found that I got more done on my feet than on my knees. But that's MY experience. Your mileage may vary.

God isn't there to grant us wishes that we think we deserve. Like a parent who knows best for their child (even when they don't agree), his plans are often not what we expect. Faith is trusting that even when things don't seem to be working for us, his plans are well laid.

I think of it like this: My dog has no idea why she has to go to the veterinarian to get shots. For all she knows, I'm torturing her. Her doggy brain cannot possibly understand the possibility of getting a serious and life-threatening illness if she doesn't get the shots. But that doesn't make the risk any less of a risk.

So our human brains can't possibly know what GOD knows. He envisioned us long before we ever existed. He has counted the hairs on our heads. Trust that HE knows what's best.

I look back on my life and there were things I desperately, painfully wanted...but I didn't need. I THOUGHT I needed it, boy did I. I didn't. I know that know, looking in the past.

I don't treat God like Santa Clause. He is not a wish granter. He is not there to answer our prayers or questions, in the exact way I want Him too. No, God not being a genie does not ruin my faith.

I asked Him to heal my marriage. "Bless" this marriage. Help this marriage. Everything. It ended in divorce. It brought be CLOSER to Him. I re-dedicated my life to Him. I became more involved with church. Met my current husband at church. Been happier ever since.

So yes there was initial dissapointment when He didn't give me the answer I wanted. But ya know, we are the children. He is the father. Sometimes our parents know what's best for us.

During my divorce, Grandma sent me my now fav scripture:
Romans 8:28 "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose."

I simply believe everything happens for a reason. I guess because I can look back on the negative things that happened in my life and see how in the long run they were a positive. Sure it sometimes takes a while to see what the plan was but it was always there.

I spent many nights praying about my first marriage and asking God to open my ex's heart. I pleaded for him to save my marriage and our family. I never believed it was God's will to end that.
The day after I found out about his affair, I got an email from my bestfriend from college whom I had not talked to in years:
'To get something you never had, you have to do something you never did.' When God takes something from your grasp, He's not punishing you, but merely opening your hands to receive something better. Concentrate on this sentence... 'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'

The last part of the email was this:
There comes a point in your life when you realize:
Who matters,
Who never did,
Who won't anymore...
And who always will.
So, don't worry about people from your past, there's a reason why they didn't make it to your future.

I discovered I'm stronger than I could have ever believed. I found out that I deserve love. I found out what is worth fighting for. I did lose some faith for a while. It was hard to face God. I wish you faith and to find peace.

Some of the best prayers are the unanswered ones.....HE works in mysterious ways but there is a method to his madness that we just are not capable of understanding especially in the given moment......HE has the big picture and will always guide us through even though it may not seem like the moment. And HE helps those who help themselves so we do have to do our "karma" and put in the effort..........

Ollie:

I've asked God for help on many occasions....there are times when I have had an answer immediately...and then other times when it felt like it was never answered at all....but when I STOP, breathe, reflect/look back - I see how my path has changed.

I see the things that God gave me - strengthened me, enlightened me, got me to where I NEEDED to be instead of where I WANTED to be.

That is the difference...where you WANT to be versus where you NEED to be.

I lost two babies in one year - one at 22 weeks and one at 10-12 weeks. I cannot tell you the ANGER I had towards God. True. Anger. I had talked to our Priest about it. He told me that God understood my anger. That's NOT what I wanted to hear....but I had to reflect on it. It took me a few years to get over that...it's a pain that will NEVER go away. EVER.

My husband lost his job after nine years with the same company. We used our entire savings in 10 months. But you know what? it was GOOD for our marriage. It got us back to dealing with things instead of just "talking" about it. God made sure we ALWAYS had what we NEEDED. Our mortgage NEVER was late. Our COBRA ($1500 a month) was NEVER late. We kept all things on and going. God worked His magic in sooo many ways...
For example - we filed our Federal tax returns - we were told it was going to be 3 to 5 WEEKS before we got it. We got it in 3 DAYS. Our state return? we got in less than 48 hours. Just when things were due.

I was able to go to Texas with a girlfriend in December with her company (they can bring spouse or friend, etc.) all was paid for but spending money - the DAY I left, someone purchased something from me on ebay. I had enough money for breakfast for me and to pick up souvenirs for my boys...there is more - but I had prayed about this for a few days prior to leaving....and God answered my prayer - I got what I needed...

If things are not the way YOU want them. Stop and reflect on where you are in your life. What it is you want and the direction you are going. Do NOT let circumstances ruin your faith in God. He is carrying you right now...you may not feel it. But I KNOW He is there. FOR. YOU. Stop and breathe. Listen. Write a journal - reflect.

YOU CAN DO THIS. If you need something - feel free to PM me.

God has NOT given up on you. Please do not give up on Him.

sometimes the answer is not now.....

It's tough to understand how things are "better" when they seem so crummy to us.
I just lost a very good friend. Over time, my prayers for her changed from "healing" to "peace."
I look at her husband and sons and think "what the heck GOOD could possibly come of this?"
I try to think that maybe the father-son(s) relationship will be strengthened, independence will increase, etc....and, still, doesn't seem like an equal trade.
I think you need to believe that we are all part of a bigger, master plan for which we cannot understand all of the architectural plans. And TRUST.

I have never been disappointed in God. I have been disappointed in myself...both for things I have asked for and for the way I've dealt with things I have received, physical and spiritual.

Since you aren't more specific, I'll just say this....God knows what we need before we ask Him. He knows what is on your heart before it ever passes your lips. Earnest prayer is so important, but God already knows...and to me, that's a huge comfort, because sometimes I can just sigh or cry and say "God, you know what's going on. Please help me."

No need to be more specific than that sometimes, especially when I might be tempted to make the specifics fit "my" will, instead of His. It all belongs to Him, it all serves Him, and I am just so very happy to be chosen as His child.

I begged God forever not to take my friend from cancer. She was pregnant and had a 1 year baby girl.
I still dont understand it why he took her. I guess I will someday...

Have you ever heard of the song by Garth Brooks "Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers", listen to the lyrics.

Many years ago I got lost in my wants. Instead of letting things *happen* I was mad at God for not getting my way. Years later I finally saw the *light and realized that my unanswered prayers were a true blessing in disguise. I honestly thank God all the time that he didn't let things happen the way I kep praying for them to happen.

Rethink your situation. Also know that you have no control over other people. Best of luck

I have asked many times for help but I have learned to ask Him to help me understand His will for me. Sometimes we want something but it's not the way He has planned. So, prayers are always answered, they just aren't always the answers we want to hear!!!!

I try not to ask him for anything I can do myself.

Which is nearly everything. If I wanted almost anything bay enough, I could do it on my own. If I haven't, then I usually just don't want it badly enough.

Why?

Because I nearly always get what I ask for, but nearly never how I meant it of its a frivolous thing. Be careful what you wish for kind of thing. Frying pans and fires.

Case in point... At one point when I was younger, I asked to stay in a place longer than I had planned. Well I stayed longer!!! Got in some serious trouble, and had no choice but to stay. And was beaten and worse every day for months. Shudder. All i REALLY wanted was to play on the beach for awhile longer. Instead of figuring out that i could take vacation and do it my darn self, i asked god to stay, and stay i did! Oy. Regrettable, if educational. Another time, i was mocking those who are afraid of flying (ive found god listens to my self important back patting), and a series of flughts I was on went VERY badly. I have now been afraid if flying for 13 Years. Similarly, fat people. Nevef micked, just had a very clear set of assumptions. Which god chose to rid me of via some first hand experience of 'out of my control'. (Conversely, asking to be thin, i wound up homeless for several months... Yep. Youll lise a lot of weight on a $1 a week food budget! Another time, even younger, I didn't want to go to school the next day. Got the stomach flu for 3 days. Nope. No school, nor pool party. Literally hundreds of answered prayers that equate to god smacking me upside the back of my head.

So, most of the time, I just talk. Chat, kvetch, gripe, smile at, wink at, sigh at, thank, count my blessings, laugh with, argue with.... But I've learned to be VERY careful what I ask for!!!

Do I give my children everything they want? Nah. I wouldn't expect God to be any different. Only I know what my children need, so does He. ( for me )
Oh my ,has He said no to me many times, have I lost faith here and there? Of course. Do I continue to turn to Him, absolutely. Faith is not easy. Anyone who says it is has never been thru the fire. But I'm a stubborn soul....I keep going back and going back to Him about the same thing....( like my kids do to me ) hoping He'll cave. :)))
Hang in there. Its ok to be mad at Him because we're disappointed, but be patient and keep moving on.

I almost always seek God's direction in my life(sometimes I'm impatient and do things without seeking Him.) Sometimes I end up disappointed because from my perspective, things didn't go the way I wanted them to.

You know how the saying "Hindsight is 20/20" right? When I look back at the things He's done for me in my life, His way and not my way, I'm amazed at how awesome He is. For example, I wanted 3 kids. I had two already and was planning to have a 3rd in a few years, that was my plan. 10 months after my second child, I found out I was prego with #3 and I was devastated. I had a 2 year old, a 10 month old and in 9 short months I would have another. Ughhhh, how was I going to handle this? I cried and cried for months over how hard it was going to be to have 3 kids so close together. Shortly after my 3rd was born and my body went thru the stress of delivering another child, it started to shut down. I got really really sick. I felt that God had abandoned me. I ended up being diagnosed with 2 very serious auto-immune diseases and was told by my doctor, NO MORE KIDS, which I was fine with because I already had the 3 I'd wanted. Looking back after my year of horror, I can see that God blessed me with #3 in His timing and not mine. If I had waited to have #3, the way I had planned, #3 most likely never would have happend and I would have felt robbed.

That's only one example of the amazing things God has done for me in my life. God is Good...All the time!!

I love Garth Brooks song "Unanswered Prayers"

http://lockerz.com/d/6634677

when I pray to the sky often nothing is changed, but when I look within and realize what I myself can do often there lies the start of change.

I am not defined by religion so my advice may not be the best. I believe in some type of higher power but I don't live my life for that power. I don't believe I have to do right to get into heaven. I believe I have to live morally right because I could not live with myself otherwise. If there is a God I believe if you live a morally healthy life you won't be dissapointed in the end...I dont believe that if there is a God that he would be an all-fearing God...if he is without human flaws, he would be without anger. He would be love. I don't believe that a catholic who sins and goes to chuch would get into heaven before a person who is an athiest but lived their whole life volunteering and giving to others.

Anyway my point is you're in control of your life, whether you believe in God or not, it is your responsibility to make changes

not sure why this one is a jff. way too serious for that.
of course i have. the gods' eye view is not ours. they don't do my bidding, it's not the way it works.
faith ebbs and flows for me. it's nice when it's strong and sure, but it doesn't always stay that way. my job, apparently, is to keep putting one foot in front of the other when times are tough. and They always do find ingenious ways of helping me be strong enough to weather the bad times.
but sure, i get disappointed when the help doesn't arrive in ways i find helpful when i'm in the trenches. and i holler and moan and shake my fist. and things always do work out, just not usually how i expected.
'all things shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.'
sorry it's hard right now, darlin'.
khairete
S.

The pastor at our church (united methodist) gave a series of sermons on what NOT to believe, based on the idea of what's the least I can believe and still be a Christian. It was a pretty controversial series, but I absolutely loved it, especially as someone who has pushed back against religion and so-called "Christianity" most of my adult life. I don't agree with how most devoutly faithful interpret religion or how they push their faith on others. But I found this series to be tremendously helpful -- this is a link to his sermon on how God answers does not cause tragedies.
http://www.maplegroveumc.org/clientimages/43601/docs/serm...

This second link is by the former pastor of the church, who had to retire because he is dying of ALS. He came back to give this sermon about how God answers prayer. It was tremendously inspiring.
http://www.maplegroveumc.org/clientimages/43601/docs/serm...

If you have a few minutes, read these sermons. They're on point for your question.

I believe He knows what is best for us and therefore, sometimes His answer is "No". Keep the faith; reevaluate your situation and move forward. Perhaps it would be helpful to talk to your religious counselor.

God answers all our prayers. Sometimes, we don't like the answers. Looking back over the most stressful situations in my life when my husband was sick and out of work for 3 years, when I didn't know how we were going to pay the bills that were due, when he got better and needed a job - all of the struggles made us realize that we needed to put our troubles in God's hands and He would provide everything we needed. He always worked everything out for good.

God doesn't work for us. We can ask for things but we have to be faithful enough to say - it's in Your hands, God. Your will be done. It's hard to have that kind of faith but I can honestly say I've never been disappointed.

Ask for guidance and listen. It will ALWAYS happen. It may not be in the form or look like the answer you wanted, but it's there. Just because you ASK for something, doesn't mean that's what you NEED. It's like asking your parents for a curfew of 2am and they tell you 11pm. It's not necessarily what you wanted, but they knew better. They knew that the bars close at 2am and you were much safer getting home earlier. You never know. TRUST.

Example: I never wanted kids and then if I changed my mind it would had been for WAY later. Well, I got pregnant (I was 27 AND married) and cried my eyes out. Turned out to be perfect timing looking back, but from where I was standing it was the worst thing that could have happened. I ended up, so far, having 4 kids AND homeschooling them while being just as successful in my career.

My mom had 8 miscarriages. I was her 9th pregnancy and my brother was her 10th. Lessons in everything and she helps other women who feel like they want to give up after 2 miscarriages!!! She's like, WHAT????? Only 2?????

It's ALL about the timing. Go with it and trust HE knows what is best for you.

God is always faithful to you whether you know it or not. God's intent is for all good, your good. How can you know what is suppose to be or not?
You're using God as a kind of supersition rather than a force which lives inside of you. The term God is very general and generic. Try using love. The love of wanting of knowing God. Seek Him (some say Her) first and all things shall come after.

my patience has long gone. many prayers have gone unanswered and i am sure many will go unanswered. i did lose faith for over 10 years. it felt good to be angry at someone else rather than life. how can life be unfair?
i learned life is unfair, and maybe my prayers will never be answered. maybe one day they will. i just wish i had the hope and patience. but i don't.

When very upset I have begged God for assistance an asked my angel for help. Help being just a feeling they were there or cared. I felt nothing.

Sometimes the answer is no...or wait and see, or not right now, or, or, or.
That's what faith is. I don't expect divine intervention at all times. HE is. not my personal problem solver. It doesn't impact my faith because I accept that the answer is not always yes. Some things I get myself into, I have to get myself out of. That is the answer. I know its not the candy coated answer, but it is reality. Just because we ask doesn't mean the answer is what we want.

Hang in there. The testing of our strenghth just means we are strong enough to handle it.

Just as we parent our children, our Heavenly father doesn't always do as His children ask/want but has His reasons for it. Sometimes He tells us "no," but it may be for any reasons. The comfort is that He remains with us, loves us and will provide us with comfort, even when we don't like His answers and even if we are angry with Him at times.

Of course! I have prayed for things to happen and sometimes they do and sometimes they don't. Usually if they don't then I later find out why and it's usually because God had something else planned for me. My plans will not always match God's plans for my life. No it has not ruined my faith. I believe that everything happens for a reason. I might not know it right away, but usually later on, I can see how the puzzle fits. I'm actually going through this right now as well. Just today I prayed and just decided to stop stressing and just give it up to God and let him handle it. That was oddly answered with in a couple hours of praying, which usually doesn't happen, but it did.