Getting Out of the House with a Toddler and 2 Month Old

My children are 15 months apart. I had the youngest always in a carrier. If I was on my own and I had to change a diaper I would ask the oldest to come and help and hold the diaper and/or hand me the wipes. If you are with others you could ask the other moms if they can keep an eye on your older one while you feed the younger. For shopping, I would park close to the cart return and the oldest would go in the cart. The youngest would either be in a carrier or in her carseat inside the basket of the shopping cart. Now that they are older they love the double car carts. If those aren't handy then I just buy a small amount of groceries that I carry in a basket if they are breakables (eggs). I put both kids in the basket of the shopping cart. smaller one in front of the other.

I was exactly where you are. Be grateful for your mom's help, but don't be afraid to do things yourself. Groups of other moms is a great place to start. They will understand. If they are moms you know and trust they will help watch your toddler when you can't get up while nursing or changing a diaper. Find another mom to go places with you. In theory it sounds llike why add more kids to the equation but they help entetain each other and you enjoy time with a friends at the same time.
Do small events or things that you can leave easily if needed.
About the parks, no strollers don't work well. Try your youngest in some type of carrier so your hands are free for toddler.

I think you've got a lot of great answers here. I used a carrier (a Beco, similar to an Ergo) for my son and watched other children. This wasn't a problem. I agree with the idea of having your son sit down for a snack or to be a helper if you can't chase after him, and consider getting a small umbrella-type stroller for the playpark, or even for small outings. These things are invaluable-- compact, easy to carry folded with one hand, and this is a great way to keep your son safe while you are loading in/out of the car-- just have him sit in the stroller and buckle him in. If you are in a situation that you must tend primarily to your daughter and he's needing a reliable place to sit, the umbrella stroller is a great place for a snack or to play with toys. If you need to use the bathroom--Instant containment! You can read a book to him while you're nursing, if need be.

One thing I'd also suggest is asking for help. There will be times when you are going to want to let him keep on playing, and as you discover how these other moms parent, you'll figure out who you trust to keep an eye on him for a couple of minutes. (Very handy when baby has blow-out diapers!) You do have to be a good judge of character *and* the situation itself; I once asked another mom I knew to look after my son for a minute, and it was all both of them needed to lose each other-- her son was a busy guy too, and the place was just too crowded. On many other occasions, though, it's worked out fine. So, you have to use your gut instinct, but overall, it's great that you are wanting to get out. Give yourself plenty of time to get there and back and I hope this turns out to be a rewarding group for you!

Go to the moms club. Ltd of women their have older children and can help you. Ask for he'll. They have all been there. I am part of MOMS club in my town and it is great

Wear your baby! It will transform your life!

I use the Moby Wrap with my children and it totally allows me freedom of movement, two free hands and the ability to carry and nurse a baby while caring for a toddler. So it will solve the problem of nursing your baby and watching your toddler.

When changing your baby, have your toddler "help" you. Ask him to hold the wipes for you, hold the bottom balm, etc. Make him feel very useful and helpful and he will be occupied and close to you while you change the baby. If in a contained park or rec area, many times another mom will watch the toddler for you while you change baby. Otherwise, the baby can wait a few minutes while you round up the toddler. If necessary, strap him into the stroller and hand him a snack or toy and tell him he can go play again in a minute after you change baby. Better to be safe than sorry!

I have used the Moby Wrap both at home and out and about. I have been able to do housework, cook, dress my toddler, read, work on the computer and so much more all with a sleeping baby against my chest. I love the Moby over a sling or other carrier because it actually hugs your baby against your body the way you would hold your baby. It also straps your baby against you in all directions so you can bend over with their head and body firmly supported and no risk of them flipping or falling out. I have been in the middle of the grocery store with a screaming baby needing to be nursed. I stopped and put her in the wrap and she nursed away happily and I was able to finish my shopping without anyone even knowing what was going on.

I was there also. My boys are 18 mo. apart and they are crazy... I mean active ;) We also are apart of a Moms club. We NEEDED that time. Some days it was hard just to get out of the house, (one would have a diaper blow out right before leaving, or couldn't find one's shoe's, or I had baby barf and snot on me so had to change my shirt, etc.) but once we learned to have things ready the night before we love going to activities. I get to visit with other mom's in same situations, and kiddo's were able to have fun, burn energy and play with other kids. Looking back at that stage, I don't know how I did it (my husband worked out of towns and came home on weekends) but we survived, and it does get easier when they get older. Mine are 4 and 2 1/2 now. I LOVED my baby Ergo. Didn't make my hips or back hurt one bit. Double stroller worked well in some places, but was more of a hassel in some situations. Snacks in tupperware or baggies are a life saver too. For the older one, It worked out better if I told him to "help" me carry the baby, so he wouldn't run off. I had one handle of the baby carrier, he had the other. Good luck, and remember "This too shall pass."

I had the same issues. Utilize the double stroller. It's a great tool. I strap my baby in the seat and follow my toddler around with it. Just start with short visits to the group and as you become for comfortable make them longer. When you need to feed your baby, just strap your toddler in the stroller and give him a treat to munch on while you feed your baby. Being a mommy group no one will mind if you feed your baby.

Good luck

Whenever I need to breastfeed the baby, I would have my toddler sit with me at the park bench with a snack. Sometimes I would strap her into the stroller to eat at the tray. That way she was definitely contained while I was nursing.

Good luck , you will do great and it will go better than you think :)

Use a baby bjorn for when going to the park , that way you can keep a closer on the toddler and still have the baby with you. If you are meeting for a playdate with a mom's group , then there are other mom's who will be/have been in the same situation , and they won't mind watching your son while you feed the baby , we have all been there and no-one minds being an extra pair of eyes for you.

My son and daughter are 17 months apart and the thing that saved me was a ring sling. I could feed and carry the infant while running after the toddler. The great thing about mom's groups if you ask another mom to help watch your todler while you are feeding they are usually really good about helping out. It does get easier. The first year was hard for me but now it is really very nice. My son is now 4.5 years old and my daughter turns 3 today.

Good luck
C.

It can seem really daunting at first, but you can do it! My group all just had their second babies, and some their third and we still get together, amazingly. You'll likely find that other moms are more than happy to give you a hand and may ask for a favour later on in return... I would get a really good, comfortable carrier for your little one and take that instead of or along with the stroller. That way you'll be well able to chase after your toddler in the park or wherever. 19-months is still pretty young, so don't be afraid to ask for a little help watching him from the other moms - especially when you need to change a diaper or whatever...

You can take your little guy to the park and wear your dd. I loved the Moby wrap, I could keep it on, it isn't bulky and baby is tucked in nice and snuggly without fear of falling out. We went to the library for story times, the park, mall. Just about everywhere with one tucked in and one either holding my hand or in the stroller.

The baby wearing made it so easy and the little one never fussed because he was on me and snug.

Definitely a wrap versus a sling. The sling isn't secure enough when your are chasing around a toddler.

After the first few times, you'll get the hang of it. You might also go to Meetup.com and put your interest info. in for those with babies and toddlers. That way, whatever Meetup group you find will have similar situations.

Good luck to you and just do it. Take the first step and go. It is freeing once you realize you can do it. I didn't have any help and we did great.

Wear your two month old and you are all set. Get a good sling or bjorn carrier and go have fun! I even took my infant with me all over the play structures when he was that age and I had a two year old to chase after. It's fun and a great way to entertain your toddler. Baby loves it too. He also went with us to story time at the library, but maybe that's not a good option with an active little one. I remember my son in story time when he was old enough and it wasn't pretty. lol. Some kids do better with run around time.

It looks like you have gotten alot of good advice! The sling ideas seem really good. I have never had a sling so I cant say much about that. I do use my double stroller ALOT tho! I have breastfed all 3 of my babies, and it does make things interesting when you have another child to care for, I agree the other mommies would most likely be more than willing to help you keep an eye on your toddler while you are feeding the little one, and would probably love to hold the little one if you need to chase the older one! Mommies love newborns :P My boys are 15 months apart so I have been where you are. My husband is military and is gone alot. I have a 4 year old, almost 3 year old, and a 5 week old- hubby was just in the feild for 3 weeks and we had tons of appts, preschool etc. The stroller is the key for me! We survived so I know you can too!! It is hard but possible :D (and at one point i had to get my car towed home because my transmission is OUT lol) Things can get overwhelming but you can do it!! Good luck and enjoy those babies while they are young :D

I second the baby carrier idea. That is the only way I was able to get anything done around the house or even shopping with my very very clingy baby. I had to watch my niece and nephews many times with my newborn and even though the thought of it was daunting, it was easier then it seems. Don't get me wrong, it was hard, but things got done. You can do it. No fear! Just pack the diaper bag, load up the kids, and go and have some mommy time!!!

For grocery shopping - does your market have the car carts? That is a life saver. I literally stalk people for their car cart! My son loves it (we have 2 kiddos 16 months apart).

As for the play dates. I'm sure the other moms wouldn't mind keeping an extra eye on your son while you are feeding your daughter. Or maybe take that time for "snack" time for him in the stroller. Sippy cup and snack trap cup?

Good luck. You'll do just fine!