Gameboy Is Driving My Son Crazy!!!!!

What we have done with my son is made a chart. For everyday he does his chores, his homework without whining, he gets a certain amount of minutes with his gameboy on the weekends (Friday, Saturday, Sunday). So when he takes out the garbage he gets 2 minutes, does his homework without whining he gets 5. They will see how many minutes they get and it actually starts to be a good way to curb any behavior problems. If he starts to give attitude he gets those minutes taken away. Then we set a timer. For instance, he has accumulated 30 minutes of play time. It is your choice if you want to split that up in two 15-minute intervals or if you want to give him the whole 30 minutes. Set the timer and once the timer goes off, that is it. Take the game boy and put it in a place he cannot get to. Our son is not allowed to take it in the car also. My son has a high functioning form of autism and believe it or not it actually calms his motor down when he starts to have a meltdown. We give him 10 minutes with the timer and he actually calms down and is ready to tackle his chores or homework. We just limit the types of games we buy him also. We have also bought him the Leapster hand held and he has actually learned to like it and he has learned so much from it.

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We limit the time that my BIL can play his playstation/other video games. He gets slightly more time in the summer than during the school year, but he is also 17 years old. My suggestion is similar to another mom's. Gameboys (video games) are a priviledge that must be earned. If your son does chores around the house, then he can earn a certain amount of time for doing his normal stuff, and extra time (on the weekends) for doing extra stuff. He will understand, eventually :). It will be rough for a bit, and he shouldn't be allowed to play it if you aren't there (at first) to monitor it, but he'll get used to the new routine. Be sure to let him know why you are implementing this new routine (he's craby, not doing his chores, being rude, etc.). Start from the beginning teaching him how to earn the fun stuff through doing the not-so-fun stuff (you work (blah, for most) but since you work, you get 2weeks of vacation per year, KWIM?) and start making him learn that ALL of his actions (negative and positive) comes with a consequence. It is a reward to play the game boy extra when he vacuums and normally doesn't, and it is a punishment when he doesn't put the clean dishes away like he's supposed to every day, know what I mean?

Take care,
M.

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Dear P.,

I think that you are doing the right thing about taking the Game Boy away - but not for so long. Just a day would be more effective, I think. Then, give it back before he asks for it. Then, when he doesn't cooperate in the family , take it away immediately, and don't notice the kicking and screaming. Just act like "I'm the boss, and if you don't like it - you need to follow the family rules". He will catch on and be a much better person for your firmness. Go for it Mom.

C. N.

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I think taking it away is a good move. We don't regularly watch media (TV, videos, computer time for the kids) but if we do and they freak out about "only" getting to watch one show I feel it means they are too wrapped up in it and it needs to not be part of their lives.

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Chuck the Gameboy. You'll be amazed at how great your relationship with your son is without it. Afraid you won't be able to fill the time? Ha! We've been with out a Gameboy and we actually play games, my son reads, builds Legos, plays outside, listens to music. What a great life. Good luck

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You need to set limits on the amount of time he's allowed to play per day/week. My sister's little boy has ADHD and she allows him to play ALL THE TIME! I talked to my ped about it and he said that tv, video games, and computers should be limited for ALL children, ESPECIALLY ADD and ADHD! (Not that either of your boys have it. It's just the reason it came up with my ped, who's also my sister's ped.) He recommends an average of NO MORE than 2 hours a day, but not more than 10 hours a week TOTAL electronic entertainment. Also, my BIL says that his son gets super crabby annoying if he plays video games for longer than 30 minutes at a time.

As with all NEW rules, the first 2-3 weeks will be the hardest, but in the end it will pay off. Just be strong and hold your ground. If he throws a fit about it, let him know he has to choices left: put the game boy away RIGHT NOW on his own and he can play again tomorrow/later OR you will put it away somewhere else and he can have it back next week! By 6 MOST kids can grasp this consequence. I used to work in an after school care center, and we would often use similar consequences with the kids. For example, if someone left a ball outside- that ball would not be returned to ball bin for one week. Some of the kids thought it was unfair because "I didn't leave the ball out. Why can't I play with it until next week?!" But we reminded them "We are a team and the team left it outside, so NO ONE from the team gets to play with it for the rest of the week." They all started taking a 2nd look as they prepared to line up to come in after playing. I only explained all this to point out that even a Kindergartener can comprehend action and consequence.

I hope your "monster" goes away so your son can come back to live with you! ~J.

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I would say that this, in general, is a good age to learn boundaries of this sort. If he's having a hard time learning the amount of time he's allowed to spend on it and when he needs to put it down then maybe he's not old enough for the lesson.

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Me personally I think that 6 is to young to play with a game boy. It does not stimulate them like they need to be timulated. sign him up in other activities that can encourage exercise and fun .I witness my 3 yr old and 6 yrs nephews do the same thi. They threw tantus, kicked screamed.. brought them everywhere with them.. you could not even talk to them. So I ook them away.. The things that came out of there mouths were aweful. So I am a firm beleiver that they should not have them til they are much older and already have a sport that thy like and activities to keep them occupied. that way when thy finally get to play with the game boy.. it is a privilidge. I apologize it I sound to harsh but now a days kids hav no repsect for their parents let alone any adult. Set you guidelines and show him that he needs to follow the rules. Don't give it back..I think it causes their minds from developing anyway

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Hi P.-- what you need to do use the game as a reward instead of a punishment. If you want him to complete chores, etc. before he gets to play it have him earn it. Say "first clean up your toys then you get the game boy" This may cause a tantrum the first few times. As long as he does not get what he wants for tantruming he will figure out that it is easier to do the chores than it is to tantrum. You just need to make sure you do not give him the game boy to stop the tantrum; otherwise he has learned that if I tantrum I get a game boy instead of if I do my chores I get a game boy. Another good idea is to set limits like allowing him to have a certain amount of time with it 20 minutes and then it is time to do something else. Hope this helps

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Give him a time limit each day to play on his gameboy. I do this with my son when he wants to play his video games, computer games, or watching his television shows. I give him about one hour, depending on his behavior that day. After he is done with his game time, we do something fun outside, or do an art project. As for your son putting off chores, tell him that he needs to finish his chores before he can play his gameboy.

M. *~

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Be firm! When he gets it, set time limits. "You can play for [insert appropriate length of timehere], then it is time for [insert other avtivity]" and stick to it. If he doesn't follow the guidelines you've set - get rid of it.
It may be easier for him to put down if there's another interesting activity lined up. Maybe?!
Good luck P.

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P.,

It sounds like your son has gotten too attatched to the game boy. It is hard for some kids to put things like this down. Try using the gameboy as a reward. If you do your chores you will get it for X amount of time. If you don't behave like a "big boy" I will take it away for X amount of time. Soon he will learn that if he is good and does what he is asked he will be able to play with the gameboy. If he is showing signs of bad behavior, he will loose it.

I would start by taking it away at night just before bed time. When he gets up in the morning, he does his chores, eats, and gets ready for the day. If he does this, he gets it, but not for a long period of time. Start each day with 5 minutes, add 5 minutes for each chore he does, for getting ready, putting on shoes, sharing toys, doing homework, etc. If he misbehaves at school, daycare, or home, take away 5 minutes.

He will catch on quick. The more I do, the more time I get, the less I do, my bad behavior, I will loose it.

If that doesn't help, take it away for bad behavior, for the day. It might turn out that he is great for the rest of the week. Don't punish him for one bad day for two weeks. One-he will forget why he isn't allowed to have it. Everyone has a bad day once in a while and you shouldn't punish him for the entire two weeks for having a bad day. It would almost be like not getting a pay check because during that pay period you had a bad day, yelled at a client, told off a co-worker and had to work late one night. That would not be fair.

Try taking the game boy away for the next day, or the rest of the day, after he doesn't do his chores or has a bad attitude, or throws a temper tantrum. You never know, by rewarding him with extra time and taking it away for the behavior it might get better.

Good Luck!

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My friend calls those games video dope. Its a pretty powerful toy, not in a good way. People I know who do not allow their children to have them say the kids get better grades then their friends and are better readers. I do not plan to let my daughter play video games. I think we can come up with better activities.
good luck

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I think like anything you will have to let him have it in moderation. A couple of hours a day or every other day and that's all he gets. It might help with his attitude and also with him getting his chores done.

Hi P.,

If something - especially a privilege - is driving your son to bad behavior take it away or remove the stimulus. It sounds like he is not ready to have this device. Explain that he can have it back when he can behave properly with it. That may be 3 days or 3 years, but he's old enough to know better; but maybe not mature enough to handle/cope with having the gameboy. Good luck and I hope you find a solution that works for you and your family!

A time limit?!, A couple hours a day?!.

Try this - take the electronic toy AWAY. He does not need it and it is negatively impacting his behavior. It distracts him from the business of growing up. If he absolutely has to have it try making it an earned reward for about 30 minutes per week - and if he can't put it down then he loses it for 2 weeks. We are raising our kids with no video games. They learn basic computer skills at school and we think that is enough. The get about 2 hrs of educational (animal planet or pbs kids) TV per week. They are 7 and 8 years old. They are not allowed to touch the remote control. We have caved in on the use of computer games at friends houses. Our boy can have 2 15 minute sessions per week with a friends computer game. This is very closely monitored. It is a lot of work, but it is worth it.
good luck