Flying Alone with Toddler

Hi K.-

The best thing you can do is BE PREPARED!!

If you can borrow a lighter carseat from someone I would HIGHLY recommend it...he's used to being strapped in for car rides and if you're worried about your own nerves you need to do whatever you can to keep him comfortable, happy and occupied. If he's squirming all around, it will be tough. I think it's great you purchased him his own seat, but trust me on the car seat thing...plus you'll need it at your destination, anyway. If you have to bring the heavy one, see if you can find a way to strap it to your stroller so you don't have to lug it thru the airport.

Here's what I do when I travel solo (which is often):

You can keep him in his stroller right up until you board the plane. Ask them to gate check your stroller, this means that you wheel him down the ramp and take him out just before you board, they load it into the bottom of the plane and bring it up when you get land & you can put him right back in. There are usually plenty of other Moms doing the same thing. Also, bring a carry on for you and a separate one for him, that way you don't have to dig through your own stuff to get him something fast if he gets antsy. The regulations for liquids change a lot, so check online before you go. Have an extra sippy cup or whatever you use that is empty in case they make you dump one. You can purchase bottled water & juice once you get through security and it doesn't matter if that's opened when you get on the plane. Make sure you have TONS of snacks. The chewing will keep his mouth busy and will also keep his ears popping! I usually try to get a new magazine for a trip (Your Big Backyard has great animal pictures) because you can go through it several times and always find something new. Also, avoid things with small pieces, because they WILL fall and roll around.

No matter what time of day it is, my kids wear PJs or sweats to stay comfy and I pack the shoes. The only thing worse than looking for shoes that have rolled around is apologizing repeatedly to the guy in front of you for the kicking. Speaking of the kicking, it WILL happen (again, the carseat will help with this), so when the guy/girl gets ready to sit down in front of you, explain to them that it's his first time flying and that you will do everything you can to keep it down to a minimum and that you appreciate their understanding in advance. That sets them up to be patient. Also, avoid taking down your own tray table if you can, it's just way too interesting, and they don't understand why it isn't a toy.

Finally, most people have "been there" and will be kind and helpful. Let them give you a hand if you need it. Peope realize that it is in EVERYONE's best interest to have a happy kid on the plane!!

Hope that helps, but really, trust me on the carseat thing!

Bon Voyage!

2 moms found this helpful

Hi K.,
I flew alone with my 2.5 year old boy when I was 5 months pregnant! It worked out well because I called the airline (JetBlue) and requested assistance. They were waiting for me at every gate and they carried the car seat and anything else for me. Jet Blue is nice because they also have in seat TV's to entertain- and don't let your son nap before getting on the plane. If the airline does not have TVs you can purchase a portable DVD player and bring his favorite movies. Bring lots of snacks, sticker books, and a couple favorite toys. AND.. if he cries - OH WELL! The other people on the plane will deal with it- right?

1 mom found this helpful

Hi K.!

I can relate to what you're going through and I think it's great you're seeking help from other moms :) When my son was about 21 months I flew with him from Hawaii to California, then from California to NJ! I think I had a ton of sleepless nights leading up to those trips and for good reason - it's difficult to travel with children because it's so far from your normal, daily routine!

First, I know at 21 months, their grasp of concepts like flying to another country/state is limited, but I would teach him and emphasize concepts like why we visit relatives, what do planes do/how they carry people, and simple maps (my son knows Dora's Map and I compared her journeys to ours) - this way he'd begin to get a vague idea of the dynamics of boarding a plane, that when we'd land he'd see familiar faces, and i'd also explain what goes on inside of the plane so he knows what to expect of himself and of others (ie. people give us food/drinks, there's a bathroom, people sit in chairs, that you're allowed to sleep/draw/watch tv etc.). Of course, you do this teaching casually on a daily basis, so as not to overwhelm him, and continue reinforcing these things (ie. drive past the airport, get him a toy plane). The point here is to make the BOTH of you comfortable with the idea of boarding a plane together, and just not throwing him into the situation without lots of answered questions.

Beyond the prep, I know you said your budget was an issue, but I would greatly encourage you to get this stroller/car seat combo called the Sit n' Stroll. Like you, I was frightened of the logisitcs of putting my son in a stroller, carrying the car seat and any luggage we had! This made it so much easier for me to travel with my son! It converts to both a stroller and a car seat which obviously eliminates tons of extra stuff. Practice a few times with it and you can even get the carry bag which is durable and easy to lug around. It zips right up!

http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=240396...

In addition, I agree with the other moms that tell you to rely on the staff to help you out. Instead of worrying, ask for help when you need it - tell them you'd like to board first and get settled in and that you'd like assistance. I'm still surprised when I ask a stranger to help me out and they're more than obliged. (btw, thanks to all the moms and dads out there that hold doors open for another's stroller! lifesavers all of you!)

Also, bring lots of quiet, inexpensive games/stickers/activities (the Dollar Store's great for that), lots of mini juice boxes/snacks in ziploc bags to make storage/serving easier, wipes (to prevent unnecessary trips to b.r. to wash sticky hands) and put all of this into a comfy, roomy backpack. Having your hands free to wrangle your son and to assemble your stroller will be a god-send!

Best of luck to you and your son, and have a safe flight - remember, lots of moms travel everyday with their kids and survived it and so will you (I did!)!

Hello! I have no idea if you went on your plane adventure yet But i traveled with my 21 month old to Norway! Yes that was a LONG flight. If your doctor told you to give your child Benadril (sorry spelling) I say DO NOT! I did and man i will never do that again. The flight attendent also told me never to do that again. She was so right!
Anyway i traveled with jon on my lap. The first flight was 8 hours long. He ended up falling asleep for the whole thing (thank goodness!) I had enough room to put him on the floor. After that i had a 1 -1-2 hour and then a third that was 45 min. He just sat on my lap and we looked out the window and we played with some NEW toys i bought for him. They were a little ones. 1 being mr potato head! He did cry some and but everyone was understanding and i think i also got looks like man im glad thats not me! One lady saw i was having a hard time and brought over a blinking light and let Jon have it.
The way back was harder. He was awake most of the time. The flight attendents were VERY helpful at helping me keep him busy. I also took the seat belt they gave me for him and just attached it to mine and let him stand and stuff around our seat. After a while i had him walk around.

I also took him to texas which was a 3 hour flight. I think the worst part is getting to the gate and geting your bags at the end.
Just buy new toys and bring some GOOD snacks and you will be ok. Dont stress...I think thats what makes it the worst!
C.

Yes, take the car seat on the plane. I always hook the car seat on the back of the stroller, its falls off and is uncomfortable but you can sort of push and hold at the same time. That way you know where your stuff is(diaper bag under stroller, kid in stroller, carseat) until you get to the gate. After that the airline will help. I know this sounds lame but I try to look like I need help especially if I do, my karma is good enough that someone usually will(I'm sure yours is too). And lastly, know that you will get through it, it will be a pain and there will be lots of deep breaths but you can do it. Good luck!!!!C.

Hey K.,
I am a flight attendant and we fly with the kids all the time. Be sure if you are going to take the car seat it has a sticker on it that is FAA approved for cabin use or you will have to check it at the gate. The other lady had great advice on what to take with you. It is good to take an empty bottle or sippy cup and have the flight attendants fill it before take off so he can drink during take off, this way his ears will pop normally and he won't get pressure in them. I know it can be overwhelming to take such stuff with you on a trip. Try to check as much as you can and only bring on what you really need to make it on the flight and or layover you might have. I have a backpack (large one) that I use when I fly with the little ones, so you can keep your hands free when you use your stroller. Good luck!

I flew with our son when he about that age.I personally did not take a car seat we did not need one at our destination. He sat and played we also had a portable dvd player which was key. My son was very active so it became a little stressful at times we had a 3 and 6 hr flight. He never slept. I suggest bringing A LOT of snacks. However I think a car seat is a godo idea to keep them in place and he will sit and see eveyone esles sitting. If the child has mobility then he is going to want to be evrywhere. Lifting the arm rest up gives him a lot of space to move around on the seat it self. If you need teh car seat on teh other end of trip then bring it.

I have traveled with my little one many times from infant to now, and it's not to bad :-) I take his car seat and check it as checked luggage, I don't take it on the flight. It's a lot easier that way. I usually just lap him and use an extra seat of there is one. When you take off and land, it's better to hold him toward you with his head on your shoulder, but besides that I just let him sit in the seat next to me or stand and play with his toys on the seat. It's always gone very well.

Hi,
I have flown with my son alone to St. Barths (switching planes and all) when he was the same age as your son. They allowed me to check in his car seat (the check in was right before you get on the plane) and can check in a stroller there too. (I highly recommend you bring a stroller to move around the airport and for your destination... I didn't bring mine and I suffered for a week!) The only issue is that the car seat is so clumsy to manage so I only really took a carry on that contained my son's necessities along wth the car seat.
It went easier than I thought, my son was well entertained with snacks and new little toys, and picture books... but I was head to toe drenched in sweat! Just know that you can walk around in the isles, and sometimes the plane is not filled at all and you can switch to a full row to yourself. GOOD LUCK! And don't worry!!!

Hi, I have flown alone with my 15 months daughter(very active)about 12 times since she was born and we leave tomorrow for Utah and will be flying again only this time her dad will be with us. yay! Anyway if you feel the need to have the carseat for safety bring it on the plane if you don't you'll have to hold your son for take off and landing. If you don't feel the need to have the car seat with you check it in, (you might want to find some kind of cover or bag for it. Your son will be fine sitting next to you. My advice on air travel with a little one is to be extremely organized. Have snacks, toys, everything you might need to keep him entertained, trust me you are not going to enjoy having a hundred people freaking out on you for him crying. With going through security make sure to have anything liquid, cream,paste, anything of that sort in 3x5 ziplock bags or security will take it. no liquid even for toddlers, you have to buy stuff after going through. Pack only what you need and don't over pack. I always use a cheap $14 umbrella stroller when going through the airport(I don't use a carseat) and it's qiute easy to get around, plus it helps if you need to use the bathroom or so your arm doesn't fall off and you can check the stroller in when you board the plane. I have had many pleasant experiences with other passengers helping me get along, don't be afraid to ask someone to help, just be sure they aren't going to run away with your stuff. On the plane it is usually really cold or really hot so be prepared for both when dressing your son. Oh and give your son a little tylenol before boarding it will help with any ear pain for him. I hope I helped a little, feel free to ask me any other questions, like I said we are experienced frequent flyers. Have a good trip!!!

I have traveled with a young child when I was the only adult. Usually, if you let someone know that you are alone with your child, the airline staff is very accommodating in helping you get settled and getting you to your connecting flights (especially in larger airports where the terminals can be a mile or more away). I had a booster seat for my son, but they stowed it at the front of the plane because it was not approved for airline travel.

If your son's seat is approved for airline travel, by all means use it on the plane. Otherwise, check it. Wrap it in a tough black garbage bag--use duct tape to seal it--and make sure your name is on the sealing tape. Since you bought a seat for your son, he'll have to be restrained during take-off and landing. If you're taking a long flight and your son is unaccustomed to traveling, then make sure you have activities for him and take him out of his seat belt for stretching and potty breaks.

I flew solo with my daughter when she was two months old to Texas. That was a very long plane ride. She actually did better than I thought. What you can do is when you check your bags check the car seat too and just bring a stroller and diaper bag with you. When you get to your gate they have early check in for parents with young children. Before you get on they will check your stroller there and have it ready when you get off. Vey simple and easy!! Good luck.

We've done both with the car seat...took on the flight and checked it. If I was going alone I would definitely check it. It is hard to manage everything with a huge car seat.
And ask about a pre-board. I am orginally from Canada and they automatically pre board people with young children when the do the handicap pre-board. When we fly out of NY they never do. It was chaos for us. Everyone trying to get around us trying to out the seat in etc. Specifically tell them you would like to pre-board so you can get him settled before everyone gets on board. Tell them anything. He will be frightened by the crowd and cry a lot. Whatever you think will do it. No one wants a crying child, including them.
Take one small backpack or shoulder bag with your wallet and all the essentials in it. Put your purse in there or put it in your luggage. Don't carry more than one bag...you want it to be as easy as possible. Take some snacks and drinks for both of you and some things to entertain your little one. Whatever is a favorite. Keep him occupied with it. And most of all....remember that babies cry, kids cry!! It's life. You paid for your seat the same as everyone else and try not to be too tense about what is happening. He will sense it and it will make it tougher. Sit closer to the front if you can so it is easier to get on and off for you.

Good luck.
N.

PS: My daughter had ear infections and was soon getting tubes, the Dr. told us to give her benadryl before flying so it would dry up the liquid etc in her ears. It made her sleepy so she was much easier to deal with!! Not that I am saying start drugging up your child but it all else fails and you think he is going to be too aggravated over the trip you could have some on hand. To ease things for him.

Hi K.,

Last month I flew for the first time with my then 18 month old daughter. Thankfully though my mother went with me. I too was anxious about flying for the first time. The only advice I can give you about the carseat is this. I was visiting my brother and did not want to bring a carseat so he bought a less expensive one, had it installed in his car and after we left he returned it to the store. I don't know if this is an option for you but it was great for us. Also on the plane make sure to bring some books or crayons to keep your son busy. I was really nervous about our trip but it was so much better than I thought it would be. Good luck!

Hi K.,
I will be flying with my son who will be about the same age. I have many of the same questions and concerns and would be interested in any suggestions too!! Thanks!

i suffer from anxiety also. i recently had to fly to a funeral(which was not too good on my nerves). my stewart saw how nervous i was & reassured me that everything would be fine. try not to worry about it, the staff should help you with your seat & everything will work out fine. they are very helpful there, so please try to relax. it's not good for you or your child. have fun flying!!!

YOU SHOULD CHECK THE CAR SEAT WITH YOUR LUGGAGE, HOPEFULLY SOMEONE CAN HELP YOU AT THE AIRPORTS OR YOU CAN USE ONE OF THOSE CARTS, CHECK ALL NECESSARY ITEMS. BRING ONLY A CARRYON SO IT WILL BE EASIER TO DEAL WITH WHEN CLAIMING BAGGAGE. SOMETIMES HOTELS OR RESORT COMMUNITIES HAVE PLACES WHERE YOU CAN RENT PACK AND PLAYS - HIGHCHAIRS ETC... MAYBE LOOK INTO THAT IT YOU DONT WANNA BRING SO MUCH STUFF, HOPE THIS HELPS

I have traveled alone many times with my son and it is a challenge, just go prepared. I would suggest you bring the car seat, however use the stroller to help you. I suggest the car seat because it is easier to keep your son from "escaping" - I have a runner. LOL. I have put my son in the stroller and attached the car seat the luggage with wheels until you check the luggage. Sometimes you can get employees to help as well. I have also pushed the stroller with one hand and held on to the car seat with the other! Once you get to the gate, employees can assist with getting the baby and car seat on board and they will store the stroller. I bring a little book bag for the baby with books, crayons, snacks, etc. It all really helps!! Don't forget to bring something for your son to suck on when taking off and landing...it will help with his ears. I was also told do the same thing and use benadryl by our pediatrician...I didn't use it the first time, but the next time I did and it worked wonders.

About 13 years ago I flew alone with a 10 month old and a few years later I flew with two toddlers. None of the times did I use a car seat on the plane. Like I said it was some time ago, so I would call the airlines and double check. The airlines did allow me to bring an unbrella stroller on. This made changing planes,exiting,and boarding planes alot easier. I was also able to bring two carry on bags. One had nessities in it,and the other had favorite quiet,small toys, and snacks and drinks that were simple,easy to eat,and relitivly less messy. My children did a get alittle wrestles due to thelong flights. We were fling to or from NY to or from CA on our flights. It wasn't as bad as I had thought it would be though. Good luck, and enjoy your trip.

S. C

I travel frequently with my daughter who also has a big, heavy convertible car seat. I bring it on board with me for 2 very good reasons. 1. She can see out the window, they car seat have to be along the window. 2. She is confortable in it and that way she can't climb all over the place. It is heavy to lug through the airport, I hang mine on the back of the stroller. Just can't worry about everyone else's impatience is the most important factor. You are trying your best and it is not easy. You can also make arrangements ahead of time to have people help you to the gate and pick you up at the gate. Most airlines will give a friend or family member a gate pass so they can help you down to the gate. Good luck and have fun! And don't worry! I will be alone this summer with my 1 year old and my 4 year old, that will be interesting too!

Hi,

I took my daughter on a flight by myself when she was about 16 months old. I did bring her carseat and use it on the plane. We got the very first row(they let people with children board first) so there was extra space for her to play down on the floor.(no space for your bags though, it had to go up in the overhead bin most of the time which was a bit of a pain.) I had to get help from the stewards to fasten the carseat properly and to remove it. People are generally willing to help a woman traveling alone with a child. I also used her stroller to get about the airport and between flights. You get a tag for it at the desk at your gate and leave it at the door of the plane. It will be there for you when you land at where you are going. It was a little hard for me to fold up the stroller while holding the baby and the overstuffed diaper bag but we got through it. We brought a portable DVD player and snacks and a new book and toy she had never seen. They don't let you bring a filled sippee cup through security but you can bring an empty one and fill it once you are on the other side. I think I bought her a piece of pizza and tore it up for her to eat on the plane along with a milk.(you may want to bring a container to put it in with a lid!) They have diaper changing stations in the bathrooms of the airports, i didn't see one on plane though. I was worried she would poop and I wouldn't be able to change her without offending 5 people but luckily it didn't happen. Maybe fill him with lots of fiber and water beforehand to make sure he goes before your flight? I had to walk her up and down the aisle at one point because she got very restless but everyone just smiled down at her and didn't seem to mind. She did have some pain in her ears with one of the landings. She was asleep and woke up crying pretty hard so I took her out of her carseat and comforted her while we landed. She ended up falling back to sleep actually so it wasn't too bad. Oh, I gave her Benedryl but it didn't really seem to work for us. She stayed awake for the majority of the flights. We had a later flight so that probably helped her to sleep through the night once we got there. All in all I was glad I did it. I was proud of myself afterward. Good luck to you! (do you have an anti-anxiety medication you can take before the flight if you need it? if not you should ask your doctor about getting a Xanax (? zanax) perscription....it works wonders for my husbands anxiety on planes and as long as you don't take too much you can still function fine)

D.

Hi K...

I have flown with my daughter back when she was about a year...Its a lil stressful, but being prepared helps alot. I did check her carseat with my luggage. I brought her stroller with me and wheeled her around the airport (the airline lets you bring it on the plane & they hold it for you for when you deplane). Bring plenty of snacks and a tote with toys and activities for your son to keep busy with. Believe me, there are plenty of nice people who will ask if they can help you. and you can ask the airline peole for help, thats what they are there for. Oh yeah...make sure u have something chewy, eithe some kinda of chewy food or a pacifier or something to help his ears for takeoff & landing. GOod luck with everything!!~~~V.

One step ahead may have a great idea for you. What you can do is strap his car seat to a luggage carrier. It's a little metal cart you can buy at a luggage store for like $20. I wouldn't check his car seat. I would use it on the plane. You put it in his seat. Buckle it in with the seat belt and put him in it like you would your car. This might give him a little more sense of security and make it easier to travel with him. If he's still on the binky make sure to bring it with you to help depressurize his ears. The sucking will make them pop. If not I've heard covering them with dixie cups works too. Or a lollipop.

Hi K.,
Kudos for traveling alone! First off..you have to change your mindset! YOU CAN DO IT! I have travelend MANY times alone with my son who is now almost 5. It is not as stressful as you think. I have a few tips and strategies that I learned from others and just found worked. YOur car seat should be arline approved. If is is not then you do have to get another one. Make sure you are bringing a small stoller of some sort, preferably one with a small basket on the bottom. That way you can strap him in, and manuver through the airport. I was able to put all of our carry on stuff in a backpack and hold his car seat in one hand and push the stroller with the other. It's not super easy, but managable. Utilize a backback. The one I have is able to hold a sippie cup and all the "stuff" I use to entertain him. As well as all the diaper stuff. I would at 21 months make sure you have an airplane seat for him. Unfortunatly, you will have to pay for it. But, at least for my son, it was easier, because it was like riding in the car, he just knew he had to sit in the car seat. I also recommend that you utilize the staff on a plane. They are there to help you. SOme are nicer than others. Some people like to board the plane early so you don't pester other passengers, others like to board last, so there is less cooped up time on the plane. You have to decide that one knowing the temperment of your child. Bring lots of new stuff. I remember bringing a couple of new little Toys..my son loved cars, books to read, crayons (color wonder), playdough (1 mini tub is perfect), a DVD player may save your life. If you don't have one, see if a friend would let you borrow theirs for a trip (I had to do that). Also, if you are really worried about getting through the airprot, use the in airport transportaion. You know the golf cart things. You just need to call in and tell them you need it becasue you are traveling alone. You will need to tip the driver. But they can get you to point A to B without ANY hastle.
All in all, it can be a good trip, you just have to know it will be eventful. One thing I did too, was bring sanitizing wipes and gel. That way, I did not stress when he was playing in the airport, I knew I could easily "wipe him down". Becasue when we were waiting during a layover, I found a nice little corner and let him "play". We rolled a little ball, played with cars, had snacks. We also walked.
Befor you go get some good books from the library about airports and flying too. That way your child will be familiar with some things.
Oh...make sure in your carry on to bring an extra change of clothing for him and a shirt for you. You NEVER know. Extra diapers and wipes too. Good luck girl! You can do it. Take pictures too! It will be a good experience for you both!

You should look into getting the Single Parent Travel handbook - http://www.singleparentravel.net. It is for all parents that travel solo with children whether you are married or not.

I just got it and think it is a worthwhile investment for all parents traveling solo because it has so many tips.

In terms of car seat...there are portable ones but I am not sure if they are approved for the airplane. Most of them are just a board for the baby's back with the straps. Try Buy Buy Baby because I believe I bought mine there. I did not like it for traveling in car though...the baby didn't seem secure enough...

As far as anxiety you should try lavender oil or something aromatherapeautic to calm your nerves...especially since traveling with a baby is already stressful enough.

It is going to be ok i just went to florida with my 21 monthold and I have anxiety really bad too.. I went to all the websites and printed all the info that I needed for my airline and for the FAA regulation... you can gatecheck your carseat or bring it on it depends on the airline you should call and ask .. I gatechecked mine what that means is when you get to your gate after you go thru security you go to the ticket counter and ask if you can have a pink gate check ticket for your car seat or stroller and when you go to board the plain you just set it right in front of the plane door before you go in the plane itself youll see people setting wheelchairs and stuff there ... then when you go to get off you have to stand against the wall and wait for your stuff to be brought up from under the plane its right where the gate thingy touches the body of the plane ... its not hard and you can get little carts to put your stuff on at the airport ask for help ...and print out terminal maps of the airports so you know where your going and where the bathrooms are and stuff so you can change your baby...they have a whole different set of rules for people traveling with children .. if you have milk or juice make sure its prepacked sealed juice and dry milk and declare it to them before you go thru and take it out of your bag its ok to have..

I'll have to let you know. I DON'T FLY!!! The last time I did was 5 years ago and I had to grug myself to get on the plane. There's just something about being with so many strangers in such a small area so high up and absolutely no control. My husband has been at Fort Bragg since October and is leaving for Iraq in two weeks. I must love him because we're going to say goodbye next week. Yes, I must love him because we're flying. A 3yr old, an 18 month old and myself, I must be crazy. After I booked the tickets, I just about had a meltdown thinking about security, changing planes, and that my kids only make it thru 30min of church before we have to leave. I too am nervous about carseats, sippy cups and the rest of it. I get back next Friday, if we make it... I'll let you know
T.

I traveled abroad with my 4 month old infant, which is different from what you are facing in many ways. I too was nervous, but to tell you the truth, it wasn't that bad. My advice would be to try to avoid diaper changes on board if possible (this was a trick with a tiny baby, i can't imagine with a toddler). Make sure you and your baby are well rested so that your coping abilities are at best...traveling can be tough on anyone! Maybe having favorite snacks, comfy clothes, and a new toy will help.

Hi, K.
I have traveled with my girls, both at the same time, it wasnt bad at all. I did not bring a car seat, I brought one diaper bag on the plane with snacks, things for my kids to do and drinks, I brought there favoriate toys, coloring books diapers and wipes, and I put everything else under the plane, I did bring a stroller on board ,they store it for you, just a little unbrella stroller, made it so much easier in the airport, and I had my baby in a carrier on my body and my other one in the stroller, If you have to change planes, after you get off the 1st plane, go directally to the other plane, then do what you need to do, like change diapers,ECT...
I felt more secure knowing I was where my next plane was leaving from. I put my toddler in the seat next to the window, it was harder for her to get out and run on the plane, she played on the floor in front of the seat and she was fine,

Dont worry It will be fine, Be over before you know it. Its not bad, and if you need help, ask flight attendents will help you. Good luck. S.

Hi K.,
The key here is to keep him occupied. My son is 3 and hes been flying solo with me since he was 6 months old. bring a toy and some crayons that are small enough to keep in your carry on bag. If the plane has tv screens then put nick jr on for him. Basically anything to distract him from annoying you and the other passengers. Trust me I know what its like to have a very active boy. I dont travel with my car seat, I just sat my son next to me and seatbelted him in once he turned two...that helps alleviate the stress of added stuff to bring on the plane.
Fight attendants are helpful if you ask for some assistance. They will take a bag or something from you and help you get settled before takeoff.
I have anxiety too, just keep calm as best as you could. You will be fine...

Hi first kudos on getting him his own seat, i wish i had done it believe me its hard when you have to have them on your lap. I think when you go to check in you can check the carseat in as well that way when you go to get on they will have it right there before you board. look for one of those golf cart things you can ride on or ask someone at the desk that way you dont have to carry him and your bag all the way across the airport it will kill you. I had to the first time i thought i would die. dont bring a big carry on, a backpack is big enough. that way you can put snacks and bottles in there. my son actually like the plan ride, he slept most of the time. i tried to schedule the flight around times he would normally sleep. someone told me also that i could give him childrens benedryl, so he wouldnt be climbing the walls. i didnt need to but i brought it just in case. i gave my son a bottle or anything to chew on right before take off b/c of the ear popping thing. My son liked to see all the planes he found it fun. the only time i had a problem with him is he would try to run off on me, one of those harness leashes would have been nice! I hope this helps some. Oh and i discovered on the way back that if you should have to go to the bathroom or in my case throw up the stewardest will watch your kid for a moment while you do either. i tried to make sure to go right before boarding and changed my sons diapher before also. good luck...it can be fun so dont stress out about it, its just another life experience!