35 answers

Feeding, Sleeping and Schedule for Twins

We are proud parents of twins who are nine weeks old. The last week or two they have become more fussy and life has become a little more challenging. My request would apply to many topics including feeding, sleeping, twins, and the importance of scheduling.

Our major problem now is fussiness that we believe is from gas and constipation. Yesterday we started them on a prescription stool softener. We are hopeful this will help. The twins are mainly fussy in the evening which leads our doctor's nurse to believe we may be dealing with colic. I'm for some reason hesitant to label them as that... I just feel that people with truly colic babies are way worse off and are dealing with babies who cry all day. We think for the most part we have it good!

Another issue we are facing is the twins "snacking." They are formula fed and they have gotten away from the six ounce feedings and seem to be starving in between feedings and will then only eat 2-3 ounces. I feel there are different schools of thought in that they should be on a more regimented feeding schedule and others feed on demand. Any suggestions?

They do nap during the day and sleep pretty good at night. We normally do a feed around 9PM and then a dream feed around 2 or 3AM. They are then good until around 6 or 7AM. We were worried if there was anything we should be doing to encourge them to sleep through the night... my obgyn (who has twins) reminded me that they probably will not sleep through the night until they are twelve pounds (not quite there yet). That made us feel a little better!

The more books we read, the more we become concerned we aren't doing enough now to get them on a proper schedule to make things better down the road. On the otherhand, we think we will do better with the schedule once we get beyond the gas and constipation that has managed to cause the girls so much discomfort. Any suggestions and similiar experiences would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

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Featured Answers

Have you heard of a book called "Becoming Baby Wise"? It is a quick read and has a special section for multiples. It really helps you with the snacking and the sleeping through the night section. Niether one of my kids were 12 pounds when they began sleeping through the night. My daugher was maybe 10 pounds and my son was 9 pounds when both slept through the night. I attribute the success to the Baby Wise book and recommend it to everyone I talk to. Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

I have not used it, but my good friend (who is also a Dr.)used the Babywise techniques for both of her children and swears by it. Good Luck!

1 mom found this helpful

I used the book Baby Wise. I had several people tell me before my son was born to use it. I loved it! It help me put them on a schedule and realize that a schedule is important. I do not have the patience to do demand feed. You just have to realize that you are always going to be feeding them. Some mothers love that but not me. With using the book my son started sleeping through the night at 6 weeks and my daughter started sleeping through the night at 2 weeks. I should explain that sleeping through the night for us is last feeding at 11:30p and getting up at between 8-9a. Try the book even if you dont use everything from it you can get ideas on how you want to do things. It explain how all the methods people might use. Hopefully this helps you out.

1 mom found this helpful

More Answers

The best advice I can give is to let all your expectations go. It sounds like you're worrying yourself over things you can't or really shouldn't change. All babies are different. When your doctor says they should be sleeping through the night by such and such I want to laugh like a crazy person because um, these guidelines we set for kids are ridiculous and I think they just drive the parents crazy. I say this as someone who's been there. I had so many expectations with my first child, when she should sleep, when she should eat. Babies know when they're hungry, sounds like yours are fighting a set schedule so just feed when they want it. You'll feel so much better when you do and as long as they continue to gain weight, what's the problem? Same for the sleep. My first child didn't sleep through the night until well over a year. And despite this fact she is a child who now thrives on schedule, goes to bed at a certain time, sleeps through the night (most of the time) and is happy and healthy. I used to drive myself crazy and think if she doesn't do this now, she never will, I have to set a schedule, I have to be the perfect mom. I quickly found out that being a good mom meant listening to my child and my instincts and ignoring the well intentioned advice of others. As for the gas thing I remember that so well. My doctor explained to me that it's a very difficult thing for babies to learn how to poop and they often grunt and cry in the process because they have to simultaneously relax and squeeze. It takes a lot of patience but once I knew that all of it was normal I felt much better. You can help them relieve their gas and bowels by rubbing their bellies clockwise and pushing their knees gently to their belly. Hope this helps. Just relax because you're doing wonderfully!!!!!

3 moms found this helpful

J.,

i am the mother of 5 year boy/girl twins. scheduling was the best thing for us...our twins were 7 weeks early and stayed in the NICU for 2 weeks. They came home on a schedule and our pediatrician advised us to stay on a schedule. They were fed 2-4 oz. formula every four hours. We maintained this schedule around the clock--even through the night and never had a problem with snacking. Our son suffered from acid reflux and was more fussy than our daughter and he sometimes ate less...but we never had a problem with him wanting to eat in between feedings. The fussiness that occurred between feedings was related to the acid reflux which also caused a lot of gas and constipation. We used over the counter anti-gas drops and that worked very well.

Eventually we added more time in between feedings as we added more oz. We are still on a "schedule" even today. Our kids are very good sleepers and eaters and I chalk that up to the scheduling we've had since birth. I'm not rigid about keeping to exact times but because they are accustom to a routine...they naturally want to eat and sleep at the same times everyday. They have several friends from daycare who don't have a set bedtime and are up until 11 or 12 every night. The parents always seem mystified that 1) our kids have a bedtime and 2) that they abide by it. Again, it's just comes naturally since we have always followed a schedule.

I think the most important thing is to make it a routine...don't stress about the exact timing...just do things in the same order. We always did a diaper change before feeding, did the feeding and then slipped them back into the crib (especially at night). They get used to routine and find comfort in knowing things happen the same way every time.

I can't imagine not following a schedule (routine) with multiples. Hope my advice was helpful. Best wishes!

L. L.
Delaware, Ohio

2 moms found this helpful

i don't completely agree with the complete schedule because everytime my boys go through a growth spurt they eat constantly all day. me myself i eat like 6 small meals a day. so in my mind each person is different my husband only eats 2 meals a day. my boys did not go on what you would call there schedule until like 3-4 months. and as far as sleeping through the night my 2nd child does great sinch about 5 months he has slept through the night. but my four year old still does not sleep through the night. he has maybe 2 nights a week he sleeps through. don't let the books get you down. they are a guideline for most kids but there is always that one child that forgot to read it before they were born. for instance my four year old. i have bought every book on sleep there is and tried to to no avail. and my second child is the greatest sleeper i have every heard of. i mean he goes down at 730 800 and he sleeps till 1000 in the morning sometime later( he might wake up but he just plays in his bed) and then takes a good four hour nap during the day. there is even times he askes me to go night night and walks up to his room for his nap. he is more like me i love sleep.

2 moms found this helpful

Read some books by Dr William Sears. He often writes with his wife Martha, and his sons Jim and Bob. Their writing teaches attachment parenting, which talks about adjusting to your children's patterns rather than scheduling, as well as lots of other wonderful ways to bond with your baby and keep them happy, calm and healthy. Also, all babies should be fed on demand, regardless of whether they are nursing or formula fed. And many babies don't sleep through the night till they are MUCH older. My 14mo old is still up during the night and my son slept through the night as a small baby, then started waking up every night from the time he was 12mo to 24mo. So every baby has their own timing. You just have to let your little ones be your guide. They know when they need to eat and sleep (and how much) and you just have to be able to work with them on it!

2 moms found this helpful

Hi J.,
I have three boys. One boy who is almost nine and twin boys who just turned six. I remember about 2 months old they had a growth spurt and went through a bit of what you are describing.(except for the constipation) That is actually when I stopped nursing my oldest, but with the twins, I kind of let them eat when they wanted to and by three months we had a nice schedule back. It changed many times until about one year old they finally settled in and kept the schedule. So I guess what my opinion is is to let them tell you what they need for now. Don't give up on a schedule, just be flexible. I hope that helps.
Good luck,
J.

2 moms found this helpful

LOL...ahhhh...a schedule...

I am only laughing because I've been there, done that...still doing that! I have 9 month old fraternal twin girls and to be completely honest, we didn't have a really solid schedule until almost 6 months old. It is just too hard! I caused myself unneeded stress trying to force them into a routine and it didn't work. Even now, when they go through a growth spurt or any major change the schedule is out the window. The schedule is very helpful though when it does get established! I am not trying to scare you...just to let you know that where you are at with the schedule is OK! They will tell YOU when they are ready for a schedule. :)

As far as the feeding issues go...we had a similar issue and every time it would happen it was due to a growth spurt. I think that 9 weeks is a time for a growth spurt. What we did is upped their regular feedings a half an ounce to see if that would help. Usually it did the trick. If they were still fussy after their feeding...I'd give them another half an ounce and so on. The growth spurt usually only lasted about 3-5 days.

My girls started sleeping from 10P-7A at about 3 1/2 months...so hopefully you will get lucky like we did! :) Something that I learned that I wish I would have known sooner is that babies need to go to bed early. I was putting the girls to bed after they were past the tired point and it was a struggle to get them to sleep in their cribs - they would just cry and scream. Now their bedtime is 7P and they sleep til 6:30 or 7A. It is really nice and they get the sleep they need while I get the break I need!

As far as the fussiness goes...they could be hungry still or they could be tired or a multitude of other things. I think that crying peaks at 3 months and then starts to lessen, so hang on, you are almost there! One of my girls was really fussy and the other was not. I think part of it has to do with personality too. My "fussy" baby did have a lot of gas and we would have to hold her back to our stomachs and put our arm around her abdomen. This helped squeeze the gas out and calmed her down.

I have an online twins e-mail group that I started when I was pregnant and you are more than welcome to join. There are about 20 of us twin mommies with babies ranging from 3 weeks to 16 months. It has been a huge help for all of us to lean on each other and just have a place to vent and know that there are people who understand! Let me know if you'd like to join! :)

Good luck and hang in there! :)

2 moms found this helpful

Hi J.,
My name is E. and I am a SAHM of identical 3 year old boys and a girl who will turn 2 next month. I wanted to respond to you b/c those first couple months with twins can be so hard and the books don't always address doing things with 2!
First of all, it sounds like they are on a good schedule for sleeping....you didn't mention where they sleep or if they sleep together. But we slept our boys together until they were about 4 months old (they were born 11 weeks premature, so they actually fit in one crib for a long time). We always, and still do, play the same CD for them when we put them down for bed....they started sleeping through the night around 5 months. And they are SO great about bedtime now. I think having the music helped them to have a que of 'it's sleepy time' but that it also helped them sleep through noise. And that is SO important when 1 wakes up in the middle of the night.
I bet you will notice a difference in their eating after they are on this drug for a while. My boys had acid-reflux and the prescription really helped them as well. But I think...kids won't starve, you can hold them off for an hour and get a good feeding in.
Hope it helps....just wait until they notice each other. One of my favorite moments was the first time they made each other laugh! And I always tell people having twins isn't twicw as hard, it's just twice as time-consuming.
All the best~E.

1 mom found this helpful

HI, I too had a very fussy little girl around this time. I changed or did 3 things. I changed bottles from advent to playtex with the disposable liners. That helped tremendously with the gas. Also, infant gas drops were my savior. I cannot say enough about those. My pediatrician said they were ok to use!!!!! and boy did I. Sometimes 3-4 doses to keep gas away or be rid of.

Last thing I end up changing formulas to Enfamil, Gentlease. I personally feel it was the change in bottles and the gas drops that made the most difference though.

As for sleeping through the night, my daughter didn;'t until way way late in the game.
I hope this is helpful
Good luck

1 mom found this helpful

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