Father's Day Gifts for My Fiance (But Not My Child Real Father)
June 09, 2008
I am getting married in less than a month to a guy who is not my child's real father but has been with us since he was 8 months old. He is planning on legally adopting him after we get married but neither one of us is sure if I am supposed to get him something for Father's Day or not. He is the only dad my son has known so I feel like I should but would that be weird since he is technically not a father? If I do need to get him something what would be appropriate?
If he's acted as the child's dad, then he deserves a gift. I do not hesitate to give my daughter's stepdad a gift, he's been a better dad than her biological dad. So, go for it, and good luck!
Congratulations on your upcoming wedding! It really sounds like the man you are marrying IS your son's real father - maybe not biologically but in his heart. A gift to recognize and celebrate his role could prove very positive for all of you and help you feel more like a family. Maybe get something your son and husband-to-be can do together (or even all three of you). How wonderful you have found a man that loves you both so much!
i would definately get him something for fathers day. He is playing the role of a father for 1 year and treats him like a son, that is a gift well deserved. My husband was a step-father to my 2 children and they enjoyed fathers day with him. It can be something very simple like a coffee mug saying "dad" or maybee just a nice card & dinner. I have a stepfather i an 44 and have 7 brothers & sisters he has raised us since i was 5, and he has taken care of all 7 of us, when your son is at the age to realize what a father is he will soon look forward to fathers day with your new husband.
Hi K., your fiance has acted as the father for most of a year and plans to take on the role of dad by adopting your son. Give him a Father's day gift of anything he would enjoy. The gift doesn't have to have anything to do with "fathering", but thanking him for his love for the baby. Most people don't object to a gift that says thank you for doing a good job. :) C.
I sounds like he is beeing a father to you child, even planning on legally adopting him , as fer as him not beeing the biological father, in my opinion really has nothing to do with it.
Does he love your child as if he were his own?
Does he care & provide for him?
Is he the main father figure for your son?
If the answer to the above questions is yes, than he deserves to get something for Father's Day
Hey, the man is the only "Father" your son has ever know,
why not give him a gift! I was raised with a step-father
and I always gave him a father's day gift.
Now the other part, hey, we guys are happy with simple things,
a shirt, a pair of pants, a billfold or even a gift card
to Home Depot or Walmart!
Gift cards are neat, that way he can get what he wants!
Make sure it has "NO EXPERATION DATE"!
Have a Happy Marriage!
Dear K.--The physical act of procreation is not what makes a father. It's the love and caring that a man chooses to express for a child. (Look at adoptive fathers!) Anyway, what I'm saying is: If you think your son will look on this man as his father (and I'm sure he will), then by all means include him in the Father's Day celebration.
As for the gift--I don't know what your budget is like. We never had much money to spend on Mother's or Father's Day, so we usually went for small things. How about a key chain with your son's picture in it? Or a framed picture of the two of them together. Something that would focus on their relationship, not their lack of a blood tie.
It appears you are getting married after Fathers Day?--and your new husband is planning on adopting--Perhaps a card with something written from your son to his new Father. IE--
I can not wait utill we are able to play ball and share guy stuff. Hunt and be pals-- fish and hang out--something like that --that will let your husband know he is going to be loved and he will be giving love and time to your beautiful little boy.
Many have fathered but few are FATHERS.
May God bless you and you up coming marriage as you become a family--K.
Any gift for him would be very appropriate. He is the Father that your son knows. He evidently loves your son or he would not plan on adopting. Those are the things that make a man a Dad not blood. You are blessed to have someone like him in your son's life.
I agree 100% with the other ladies...a real father is so much more...any one can be a father but it takes someone really special to be a dad. Without a doubt you need to get him a Father's Day gift. Congratulations on the marriage and be happy you have a man in your life that is so willing to take on your son and raise him as his own.
I think you answered your own question! He will be the male role model in your childs life and from the sounds of it the only man that will be in his life. It takes a very special man to be able to step up and take on such a great responsibility. The guage should always be your heart.
I definitely feel your fiance deserves recognition on Father's Day. Kuddos to him!! I would give him the same type of gift and/or celebration you would give his biological dad, especially since his biological dad is not in the picture. You and your son are very lucky to find a man to step up to the plate on being a father. Congrats on your upcoming wedding!!
Honey let me tell you something you have don't have to be a father biologically to be a Dad. You bet ya you get him something for Father's Day. He has been there for that little boy when no one else was. He should be honored, you don't find many men these days that will take on that responsibility. You tell him I said keep up the good work and Happy Father's Day!!!! God bless.
He is a father! Weither or not he is the biological father he is still the man raising your son! My husband and I got together when my daughter was six months old and he would get extremely offended when people would say he is not her dad because in reality he is. He is all she knows as a dad and calls him dad. We have had three other children since her and he is just as proud of her as all the other kids. I got him something for his first fathers day to show my gratitude for not only loving me but also my daughter. I hope this helps and that you guys realize that your fiance is your sons father. Your son will not fully accept that fact until you and your fiance do.
What are you worried about? The "Fathers Day Police?" He has been "a father" and is still going to be the father for the rest of your sons life. Why not start NoW! I'm sure he earned it. ;-) As for the gift, show him how much you love and appreciate him for already being there for you and your son.
K., there is a difference between being a Dad and a father. A dad is just the "doner" sorry...no other way to put it. A father is someone who nurtures and loves the child. Get a present for him to let him know that he is loved and cared for.
He IS a REAL father. A real father is a man that is there to love, care for, and teach your son to become a respectful, caring, trustworthy, independent, Christian man. I learned real early that blood doesn't make family. My father left when I was seven. He didn't reappear into my life until I was old enough for child support to no longer be an issue for him, around 25 or so. Is the bio dad in his life? Will you buy him a father's day gift even if he is not involved in your son's life just because he got you pregnant?
It seems odd that this would even be an issue up for debate. In my opinion, a father's day gift is a gift to show appreciation for the man who is raising your son.
I wish you lots of luck and love in your upcoming marriage. May God bless all of you in your life's journey!
First off, congratulations! I don't think it is weird at all. A father isn't defined only by genectics, if this man cares for the child, takes care of him, spends time with him and other father-like characteristics then its not inappropriate at all. He would probably be moved by the gesture and a good welcome to the family. Good Luck.
A Father's Day gift would be a wonderful idea. You say he is "technically not a father" but since your finance has been around your son for over a year, you are getting married & he plans on adopting also. Does your finance help you with your son (feed him, change him, give him a bath, play with him, take care of hime when he is sick & all that goes with being a good parent? If so, then that sounds like a "step-father" to me. Type of gift, what about "Father & son" figurine or really nice plaque about being a Father? Go to any Hallmark store or Highlands @ First Colony Mall(they have lots of nice things). Hope this helps, best of luck.
If he's acted as the child's dad, then he deserves a gift. I do not hesitate to give my daughter's stepdad a gift, he's been a better dad than her biological dad. So, go for it, and good luck!
I would definately get him something. He thinks of your child fondly enough to want to adopt him when you get married, which makes him a wonderful father! I do a little thing every year and get my husband a card and with finger paint I put my sons hand print as his signature for the card from him then write his name and the year next to it. Even something small like this would make his day, I know most dads just like a day out with the family and maybe a dinner out at a bbq place or something like that.
well best luck and you sound like you have found a great father for your little one!
Of course you should. Being a (biological) "father" and a dad are two totally separate things. My fiance and I have been together for 3 years and my daughter will be 13. She totally thinks of him as "dad" because he is the one that is there for her when she gets out of school, he helps with homework, etc. It shouldn't at all be "weird." To me Father's Day is not just for your dad or your child's father...it is for the male figures and role models in everyone's life that have cared enough to make a difference. A day where we can all say...hey, we appreciate all that you do. In terms of gifts, what does he like? Fishing? Get him some cool gear or a gift card to Bass Pro Shop. Gift Cards are always great. That's what the men in my life get. Or you can always go for the item that he's had his eye on that you know he would never purchase for himself. Hope that helps.
Although a little surprised by your question, I offer this counsel with genuine love. With the info you provided, OF COURSE your son should treat this man as his father. He WILL BE his adopted father in the time that it takes for the courts to process the paperwork and he is his FUNCTIONING father today!? Have you never been to the greeting card section of a store to look at Father's Day cards? They make them to give to fathers, husbands, brothers, uncles, adoptive fathers, and male friends that you wish to honor on Father's Day. If I don't miss my guess, they make a card for "fiances who are the non-biological but ONLY father a child has ever known and who are planning to adopt!." It really seems to me that (1) you are worrying about things that are unnecessary (and life will deal you plenty of REAL worries, so pick your concerns carefully) and (2) you are FAR too RULE-BOUND! Relax.
First, thank Jesus that there is (evidently) a committed man in your life who is willingly (?) stepping into the role of father of your son. Then, after the two of you get married (if you have not already done so), identify a Christian church to call home and raise your son and future children with the wisdom, blessings, guidance and peaceful assurance that ONLY Jesus Christ provides.
Have a blessed day (and enjoy the scriptures below),
Exodus 20:12 - "Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the LORD your God gives you."
Deuteronomy 1:11 "May the LORD, the God of your fathers, increase you a thousand-fold more than you are and bless you, just as He has promised you!"
Psalms 78:1-7 - "Listen, O my people, to my instruction; Incline your ears to the words of my mouth. I will open my mouth in a parable; I will utter dark sayings of old, which we have heard and known, and our fathers have told us. We will not conceal them from their children, but tell to the generation to come the praises of the LORD, and His strength and His wondrous works that He has done...which He commanded our fathers that they should teach them to their children, that the generation to come might know, even the children yet to be born, that they may arise and tell them to their children, that they should put their confidence in God and not forget the works of God, but keep His commandments..."
1 Corinthians 4:14-15 - "I do not write these things to shame you, but to admonish you as my beloved children. For if you were to have countless tutors in Christ, yet you would not have many fathers, for in Christ Jesus I became your father through the gospel."
Ephesians 1:3-6 - "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we would be holy and blameless before Him. In love He predestined us to adoption as sons through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the kind intention of His will, to the praise of the glory of His grace, which He freely bestowed on us in the Beloved."
Hebrews 12:9 - "Furthermore, we had earthly fathers to discipline us, and we respected them; shall we not much rather be subject to the Father of spirits, and live?
1 John 2:12-14 - "I am writing to you, little children, because your sins have been forgiven you for His name's sake. I am writing to you, fathers, because you know Him who has been from the beginning I am writing to you, young men, because you have overcome the evil one I have written to you, children, because you know the Father. I have written to you, fathers, because you know Him who has been from the beginning I have written to you, young men, because you are strong, and the word of God abides in you, and you have overcome the evil one."
You don't have to be a biological father to be a Dad to a child. Definitely get your fiance` a gift from your child. His Love makes him more of a Father to your child than anything else. I have stepchildren and they love me as if I were their biological mother. I get Mother's Day gifts and cards from them every year and also birthday and Christmas gifts and cards along with a phone call on those special days. I recently lost one of them and in the obituary, I was referred to as the Lady that he called "Mom". That meant a lot to me.
It does not take his blood to be a daddy. The only time our daughter has seen her "biological" father was when she was 2 weeks old, and I highly doubt that will be anything she remembers. Her daddy has been in her life since she was 3 1/2 and we married when she was 4. He has been daddy to her ever since. I say definitely get him a father's day present and get him anything. I do not think there should be any limitations just because he is not the biological father. He will be your son's daddy in every way that matters! and Thank God daily that you found someone to love your child as his own...I know I do!
He may not be the biological father but he is taking on the father role when he does not have to. You are a package deal and he excepted that. Most men don't want to raise another man's child, so yes you should buy him a gift. It does not have to be an expensive gift, but something from the heart that shows that you appreciate him for taking on the father role.
Any man can father a child, it takes a real man to be a father. If he is the only father that your child has ever known then he is the father. Besides, you're getting married and planning on him adopting your son. I don't understand why there is any doubt or ambivalence on your part. Go out and buy him any gift that you know he would like. And don't feel weird about it, just feel weird if you don't get him anything.
Gongratulations on gettin married. Eventually you have put some thought into allowing this gentleman to play a role in your childs life. YES get him a gift,You can get him a nice shirt, think about the things that he likes, a cd, a movie. Or even you can trace the baby's feet and hands on a nice paper and have the baby get a color and let the baby draw on it. You can put a small message on the drawing.The smallest thing mean the most.
If he is the one that your son feels is his father than he is and he deserves to be observed for Father's Day. It doesn't matter who his real father is. Your fiance is the one that is the father to him, so get him something nice for Father's Day. Now when it comes to a gift for him, depends on what he likes, but he might not be the birth Father, but he is his Daddy.
By all means get a father's day gift for your fiance,a father figure is someone who cares for, and nutures you when you need it most.It he has a hobbie,or a nice plaque ,or a coffee mug with his name on it ,if he drinks coffe,the stores will have lots of ideas.I'm sure you will regret it if you don't get some momento for him.
Have a great day.
As i tell my husband daily anyone can be a father it takes a real man to be a dad. In my house we don't call it Father's Day its Daddy's Day and we get up and my him breakfast and go and do a fun activity together. Last year we went fishing since that is my hubbies favorite thing to do. This year we will probable do the samething. The kids also make cards and my 16 month old will probable scribble on a piece of paper and give that to him for the card. I try not to spend money on the holiday and homemade gifts mean more for my family.
Good Luck and don't worry if you do nothing fiance and your baby know who the dad is. Good Luck.
Technically, HE IS THE CHILD'S FATHER!!!!!! If the child's biological father is nowhere around, and this mas has taken in your child as his own, HE IS MORE DESERVING OF A GIFT!!!! Take the time and go find him something nice, such as a favorite cologne that he wears, or a gift card to his favorite restaurant or activity.
As far as I'm concerned, he is the child's father, and I'm more than sure that he got you something for Mother's Day, and so return the favor!
My husband of 6 months is not my daughters' "real" dad either, but he's been around since the oldest was 3 and the youngest was 9 months. We always get him something for fathers day. He is a father to them.... if you had adopted a child wouldn't you want them to get you something for mothers day? that's the way i look at it.
I'd say yes, let him have a father's day. I have a friend that her husband isn't the father of her kids and they don't have any together yet, but he's been nothing then the best dad for those kids. But as far as what to get him, i don't know. I'm really bad about coming up with ideas for gifts.
Sounds to me like he is a father to him, just because he is not the biological father does not mean that he has not been there and doing the things that a father does. I would definitely get him something, after all everyone likes to recieve something letting them know that you appreciate them. As far as gifts go what kind of things does he like? Is he a golfer, fisherman, sports fanatic? If so how about a customized gift bucket done in his favorite sports team filled with his favorite snacks, or a fishing can filled with new lures, hooks, etc. or a golf can filled with balls, tees, etc. Check out website for samples of the gift buckets at http://www.stinkincutecans.flyingcart.com
My advice would be to get him something that he has interests in or likes. If he is taking on the responsibility of your son and you are both working together to raise him - he is a father. You don't have to be biological in my opinion to be a great father/mother. Especially since his adopting him - then he will be the only father your son has.
You should definitly get him something. It takes more than genes to be a father, and it sounds like your fiance' is a loving dad to your son. Show him how much you appreciate the fact that he loves him like his own.
Yes! absolutely get him something. It would be a token of love, respect and appreciation for all he has done for your son and you respectively. He IS the father figure and deserves this recognition. It will make you closer as a family to know he is loved and appreciated............
Have a Blessed Day!
Hope this helps! My children love my boyfriend of 5 years, we live together and my children always insist on getting both their biological dad and "stepdad" a gift! They love them both! My boyfriend feels closer to them for this action on their part......they are a 12 year old girl and 15 year old boy
My second Ex-husband is the only father my 19 year old daughter has ever known. Even though we are divorced, he was a part of her life for 10 years. She still gets him a present and goes to lunch or dinner with him. Her biological father left before she was born.
There are cards out there for "Like a father to me" and for "someone special" on father's day. Like most of the responses, yes, get him something. Even if it's only a card to show how much you appreciate him. It reminds me of a country song where the guy says, "I hope that I'm half the dad that he didn't have to be." Talking about his step father.
Good present ideas are, sports stuff (golf, baseball etc...) if he is in to that. Music stuff, I-pod, CDs etc.. B-bque stuff .....whatever he is interested in.
You are lucky to have found someone so special!
Yes, get him something. Especially if the real father is not in the childs life and your about to marry him. That would mean the world to you fiance. Maybe a card or a bottle of cologne. Just something simple.
The original intent of Father's day, as I understand it is that the children honor their father or father figure. I am sure your fiance would appreciate even a card scribbled from your son and a family outing all of you can enjoy. The heart is the point and it sounds like your fiance has one for this little guy of yours. Enjoy !
Why hesitate. He is really the father of your child in all senses except the technical parentage one. Get him anything you think he would like. Take your 19 month old with you to get the present for "Daddy.Y J. K.
It would be a wonderful idea to get your fiance' a Fathers Day present. Since this is the only man your son has ever known and he has 'techincally' assumed the responsibility of being a father and is going to adopt you son, this gesture would also show how much you appreciate his willingingness to be a father to your son. I have been married to a wonderful man for over 12 years. I have a son from a previous relationship and they have bonded very well over the years. My son calls him 'dad' and they everything a father and son would do. It is very rare to find a man who will take on another man's responsibility. You definitely have a keeper!!! Best of luck to you!!!
Go for it. He is the childs father in a way. As the child grows I would let him know that he is not his bio dad just because that would be a shocker and theres no reason not to tell him. Its just as you said a technicallity. When it comes down to it he is the boys father. Congrats on finding a good father for you boy and also on your soon to be marriage! God bless.
Father's are a dime a dozen .Excuse me , for a moment, (while I get tacky ). Anyone can donate what is needed to make a baby . But Dad's they are to be treasured . They are loving and kind and help raise a happy,healthy, child. Yes,you should get the man you're marryng a dad's day gift. ( see when you call it a Dad's day gift , it makes more sense).As to what you should give him , I would give him something he would buy for himself , but hasn't . If you can't decide what to give him , a gift card is always the right size and color . ( so he can pick out what he likes ) G.
I believe Father's Day should be treated the same as Mother's Day. On Mother's day it is perfectly acceptable to give a woman some token of appreciation if she has taken on the role of mothering. So if he cares like a father, treats him like a father, then you treat him the way he is acting in your life and your child's life. Maybe a nice card with a gift card to somewhere he really likes. M
Since your son is so young and doesn't have a clue about Father's Day yet, I'd say this is an issue for you and your finacee to decide. It shouldn't be what you're "supposed" to do, but rather what feels comfortable to the two of you. Discuss it with him and find out what his honest expectations are. If he feels he is your son's father, then something would be appropriate, but maybe more along the lines of "thank you for being a father to my son" rather than something from your son.
I would he has been a father figure for this little boy since he was 8 months old. Get him something little like a sentimental card or a best dad shirt.He will love the gift. I speak from experience I have 2 step children and I love their gifts
They make cards that are for "Like a father to me" if you are concerned about it. I would definately celebrate the holiday with him. He is like the father and soon will legally be the father. I think that homemade gift are the best. Something with a picture and a handprint, etc. Maybe even go out to eat, etc.
I don't know who has responded to this request, but my take on it is:
Any man willing to step up and be there to provide love, support to another man's child is an Angel and should be treated as such. He's more of a Dad than alot of guys' out there and should be recognized for it! He's willing to adopt your little bundle of joy, and that makes him his dad.
Anyone can be a father, but it takes someone special to be a Dad! (I love this quote!)
On what to get him for Father's day, how about a picture of the two of you for his desk at work? Maybe with a little slogan of "We Love You"...Or a coffee mug that Hallmark sells: You put the picture of the two of you inside the casing...and you can draw and put stickers in it...and it's specially for him.
Good luck! And Please pass on my regards...he truly is a great Dad!
Don't waste anymore time thinking about this, have fun, and go shopping for this amanzing man in both of your lives! He wants to adopt your bundle of joy, he obviously feels very strongly for both of you, help him celebrate father's day, he seems to be such a wonderful part of your child's life, don't let blood lines get in the way!
Since he is being the father then yes you should. It doesnt matter if he is the bio father or not for a guy to step in and take that responsibility is what a REAL FATHER is made of. You've got a really great guy that is trying to be a daddy so get him something he can use or that he has had his eye on or maybe something that says daddys first first fathers day. If he likes tools get him tools.
A person doesn't need a birth certificate bearing their name to be a father. Many men are fathers to children who aren't their own. I grew up with many father figures and they indeed deserve to be recognized on such special days as Fathers Day. Your husband to be will be so appreciative that you thought of him in this way so I would definitely do something special. Just go with your gut instinct and your heart and you can't go wrong! Good luck and congratulations on your upcoming marriage and new life together as a complete family.
I think your soon to be husband would maybe be a little hurt if he wasn't recognised on Father's day. He is already everything a Daddy is supposed to be. I have an idea for you. You can buy him a little something you know he would like and use and then give him a keepsake. Go to the sites below and find a good poem. Use some washable ink or paint that is thined a little and add your son's hand prints to the page the poem is printed on and frame it. The last link is a list of different poems the first one is just an example of one of the ones that are there. Best wishes on a happy healthy future with your new family and Happy Father's Day to your son's "Daddy".
Of course he is the real father if he's the only father your child has known. Sperm donation isn't the criteria for fatherhood, giving of one's self is. If he's the one who gives his time, energy and love, then he's the REAL father. Not giving him a gift, IMHO, would be very very sad.
Celebrate the fact that your little person has a wonderful dad and say thank you and acknowledge all the wonderful that is this dad by celebrating him this father's day. It isn't the gift, rather the thought, the welcoming, the appreciation that counts. I'm sure he'd be hurt if he wasn't recognized. Make him breakfast in bed, give him a handprint of your (and his) son with the words, "THANK YOU" written on it. That will be etched in his heart forever and would be a great way to start your marriage.
First of all, congratulations on your upcoming wedding. Although your fiancee didn't provide any DNA to your son, the fact that he has been around since he was 8 months old and is helping to raise him, embodies that he is your son's father. Avoid the traditional route, and get something that will truly have some meaning to him. Maybe a plaque with both of their names or a piece of jewelry that has both of their birthstones in it (similar to a mother's ring).
my friend's husband has been in her girls lives for about 8 yrs now, and even though they have a father in their lives, they also treat my friend's husband as a father.I had a step mother for years and always got her something for mother's day. I think that it really is up to the individual,if this man has been like a father to your boy, (whether or not the boy's real father is in the picture) then he deserves to be recognized, especially since he is going to marry you and adopt the boy. Haven't you ever heard of people giving a father's day card to an Uncle or even a friend! I sent out mother's day cards to all of my friends who are mom's and they are not a mom to me! As far as the gift goes, what ever you think that you might give his real dad! some give cologne or ties, others give homemade things from the heart, and some might give the baby's footprints or a picture of the three of you together in a nice frame I think would be a wonderful devotion to the fact that you all three are becoming one family! My husband and I each have an adult child from a previous marriage and we give each other a card, small gift and go out to eat to celebrate! good luck!
Being a Father or Mother is not always genetic. Your fiance sounds like he is treating this child as his own, that is what counts. Don't feel obligated to get him a gift, the gift should be out of LOVE. Why else would he want to adopt? God adopted us as His children----and He gives us gifts, such as your fiance. Treasure the gift and respond out of LOVE.
I know it may seem weird, but take it from me. He may not be the "father", but he is the dad. And any man willing to step up and take responsibility for a child that is not theirs is a "real" dad and deserves celebration on this special day. Anything that shows your love and appreciation will be appropriate. You better believe I will be celebrating with my "real" dad this year and every single year.
I would, anybody can be a father but it takes will character to be a dad. This man sounds like he's been just that especially since he's willing to adopt him. Definatly give him a gift showing your gratitude. You may even write something special in his card. Now if he is going to feel awkward like your feeling then you'd probally have to re-think the whole adoption thing, thats your answer right there since he's willing to adopt him he will feel so honored to receive a gift from you.
your son is small so pick a
childs card ,and but a small gift card inside and write something cute (like my would'nt let me borrow the car so i ordered this of the internet dad )andsign as you think love my new daddy or just daddy
good luck L.
Get him a gift, and celebrate Father's Day with him, for him, for sure girl! Being a "father" has very little to do with biology, and everything to do with the heart. And it sounds to me like in this mans heart, and in this childs heart, this is Dad! I'd make it really special, if I were you!!
Congratulations, and good luck to you and your family!!!
I think I would give him a father's day gift since the child knows him as his dad. At 19 months he doesn't understand the type of gift he would give. I would buy something that made you feel comfortable. Once your soon to be husband adopts him I would buy a frame. You could have something monogram something like a family at last.
Being a father does not mean that "technically" you fathered a child. My sister, who's ex-husband left when the youngest child was barely a year old, receives father's day gifts from her four children because to them she has been both mother and father. I would give a father's day gift to the man who was really been a father to my child and the gift would be the same as if it were his natural father or not. At this point, if you ask me, this guy is your child's father.