Exceptable to Text? or Not?

Yes, you are being petty...

If you work full time - he is TRYING to be polite and have you call when YOU can...not on his time, but YOURS....this saves you saying "what do you want? I'm working!!" or "I can't talk right now - I'll call you back later."

11 moms found this helpful

"Text when you can" = "There is nothing urgent, but I have something to talk to you about when you get a chance. If it takes you awhile to get back to me, that's OK."

Ringing phone from spouse = "I need to talk to you now, please pick up."

At least, that is how it translates in my home.

10 moms found this helpful

he probably just doesn't want to interrupt. it is acceptable, but not exceptable ;)

7 moms found this helpful

I always text my husband. When I worked and now that I'm a SAHM my schedule is much more flexible to talk, where as his is not. He is constantly in meetings or driving and I don't want to interupt. When I have something that needs to be discussed or answered right away I call, but when it's something not so important, I text or email. I think he's trying to be polite and not interupt and allow you to call him on your terms and not being rude.

6 moms found this helpful

I agree with Cheryl O, yes, you are being petty. I think its nice that hubby is trying to be considerate of you working and your time. He is probably just trying to give you a "heads up" that he needs to speak with you and to call him when you get a chance. I'm sure you would be complaining if he just picked up the phone and called you all the time too.

So get off mamapedia and call him back! =)

6 moms found this helpful

I do that when my hubby is at work. I figure he can read the text (or actually email in my case) and call me when it he has a minute to talk, and that way my call is not interrupting something important. He always picks up the phone when I call, and sometimes I want to tell him something, but it isn't timely or urgent, so I would rather do it when its a good time for him and I can have his undivided attention.

6 moms found this helpful

I think it is courteous for him to do it, rather than just assume that it is a good time for you to talk. I find it quite acceptable.

5 moms found this helpful

My husband and I both do this exact thing. I think it's completely acceptable... In fact, I very much appreciate it. I know that my husband is not sitting around doing nothing at work all day and some times are just simply not convenient to talk. I appreciate the fact that he does not assume I am available all day and working hard too - even when I'm at home with our daughter and not at work, I am very busy. I like that he recognizes that I'm probably busier than him when I'm at home. I sometimes get a flutter of worry if he calls me while I'm at my job because I feel like it must be really important if he feels the need to talk right at that moment. I think it's courteous and your husband shows respect by knowing you're working really hard all day and not available for his every whim.

**ADDITION: I just wanted to add that I wasn't trying to say you WEREN'T being respectful by just calling and not texting first. I reread my post and it kinda came off that way - I didn't mean that at all. I just think it's a personal preference thing, but for HIM, I think he's being respectful.

5 moms found this helpful

Maybe he is assuming you are busy and is trying to be considerate in that he's asking you to call when YOU get time?

5 moms found this helpful

my husband does this, but only because it's not as acceptable in my office to receive personal calls, so I'll call on a break, unless it's really important, then he just calls. Does he think this could be the case?

4 moms found this helpful

Maybe he just doesn't want to intrude or get you at a bad time.

4 moms found this helpful

A lot of people prefer the texts when at work because you are not being interrupted if you are doing something important. The way My hubs and I do it is we text if it is not important/can wait, and that way if it is a call we know it is an emergency and we need to answer.

4 moms found this helpful

My husband and I text each other often throughout day, as we may both be in meetings, court, whatever. sometimes we just go back and forth talking about the kids, joking around, or what we're going to eat for dinner, but often tell each other to call when your not busy.

4 moms found this helpful

I think he's being polite, in case you're busy. My husband and I text back and forth all day, and it's understood that if it's a text, it's no big deal, and we'll get around to it sooner or later, but if one of us calls the other, it's important to talk NOW.

But we text more, because my office is not very private, and his is super-quiet. So we can still have an ongoing conversation during the day without a peep. :)

4 moms found this helpful

You'd hate our house ;) My husband's office is upstairs, I'm downstairs with the kids. I know he spends a ton of time on the phone so I don't want to go banging up the stairs, often with kids following me, and possibly interrupt a very important phone call. So I text him something and he'll pop downstairs when he's free or quickly text me back depending. When he's on travel I don't call him unless it's an emergency, I only text him. He does his best to schedule as much as possible to make the trip as short as possible so he's booked almost every second of the day and I shouldn't interrupt him all the time with phone calls for things like where did you put X child's favorite shoes, I can't find them.
It's rare for me to actually call him on the phone and visa versa.
It works a lot better.
Before texts I'd email him all the time with little this and thats. He has his personal email set up on his phone as well as his business so I use that and he gets them right away. I still use it for something that takes longer than a text to convey.

3 moms found this helpful

My husband does that, because he tried to call and i didn't answer, so its his way of saying that he will have his phone on him and he needs to talk to me.

3 moms found this helpful

We text all the time like that. I don't know if it is considered "acceptable" or not.

Many times, one or both can't answer the phone but can see a text and will call asap.

Another case, I work at home as CFO/co owner for our company but I also substitute teach on the side. When I am teaching, I do have my phone handy and I check texts at certain times of the day just in case I need to attend to something business related or with my daughter at her school.

It does not bother me.

3 moms found this helpful

It's quicker to text and much more private. My husband does not like to talk on his office phone because, if they wanted to, someone could tap into the conversation. If he calls then he does so from his cell, but he'd need to leave to go elsewhere, so it's easier to text.

2 moms found this helpful

My husband I always text call? to the other. We have to keep our phones on for work and don't want to disturb the other if they are in a meeting or something.

2 moms found this helpful

it seems like he is assuming you may be busy and doesn't want to interrupt you, and for you to call when you have a free minute. I think that is being very considerate, for you, and your job. I don't know where you work, but most employers don't like personal phone calls, unless they are urgent. So, I would think you have a very considerate hubby! :)

2 moms found this helpful

I just read your "So What Happened." You're not necessarily wrong, just let him know you'd prefer a phone call. I try to text my husband whenever possible for the same reasons listed below, but if he asked me to just call him instead I would. You have to do what works for both of you. It's not about right or wrong, just what works.

1 mom found this helpful

My husband and I like to talk on Skype during the day and I always message him beforehand because I never know if he's in the office or busy. Maybe your husband is doing the same thing. Isn't it nicer to be able to call at your convenience?

1 mom found this helpful

Yes & No. I guess my first question is does your hubby spend a lot of time on the phone at work? If he does he may not want to talk on the phone.
I spend 9-10hours a day at work on the phone. The last thing I want to do is talk to anyone on the phone when I am not working, and would much rather text.
Sometimes its easier to get an answer from someone via text than thru a phone call.

1 mom found this helpful

I think it's stupid. It takes less time to pick up the phone & talk to you. Why not just call?!

1 mom found this helpful

We text when it's not urgent.
If it is urgent, we text '911' which means I need to talk to you NOW (like we've (son and/or me) been in an accident or we're on the way to the hospital or the house is burning down.
Life and death emergencies are rare.
We're both busy working and never know when one of us is in a meeting.
I think your husband's doing what is most polite.

1 mom found this helpful

My son's dad will text me to call him when he knows that I'm at work because a text is not nearly as distracting as the actual phone ringing and he doesn't know if I'm in a meeting or what I'm doing so he doesn't want to be to distracting. He only calls in an emergency. I have done the same things with my friends when I know they are working and they call when they get a free chance.

1 mom found this helpful

He is trying to be respectful of YOUR day/time and schedule, so yes appropriate, loving and kind in my book. I am a SAHM so I can call people whenever in comparison to my working friends/family; most of them I text a simmilar message, I also have a number code for urgency at the end
no number is call when you can even if it's end of day
9 is call ASAP
91 is drop what you are doing and call (many can not answer their phones in the office but can read a text)
911 gets a call

You're not being petty. He's wasting texts when he does that.

My husband will do that :). Or call me to tell me to call someone else. Ummm, lol. I think it's just the male mind maybe!