For my son time outs were very effective in the beginning and for some behaviors they still are...he is now 4. For things like talking back and not listening we added this to his chore chart. Instead of being "on" him all day. I will gently remind him about his magnets (that's what marks his chore chart with). At the end of the day he gets a magnet for "having good listening ears" and "being respectful". We try to put the desired behaviors in a positive spin. His chore chart earns him activities with the family - right now he is working on earning a camping trip. When we started this, it was just a behavior chart. We started it when he was about three. He got stickers on a chart I made on the computer. We worked on no more than three behaviors. At that time he was earning some sort of prize. I would buy something he was really interested in ...usually at a garage sale, I never spent very much on it. I would put it on the refrigerator to see, but he couldn't touch it. When we talked about his behavior chart, he then got to see and touch what he was working for, for just a minute. Once he understood how the chart worked and saw some stickers on there, we added that he could lose stickers. In the beginning, he would lose one after a few warnings, then slowly we worked down to losing it after one warning. It's been a successful tool for us. It's a more positive way of handling things. And he is so proud of it. He used to show anyone who came over how many stickers he earned.