Dragging Through Son's 1St Grade Homework

Does he read for fun?
Sign the paper that he read and move on. My kids all read above grade level and at first I tried to "make" them do their reading. It was so counterproductive. So according to all their 1st-3rd grade teachers, they all read their 20 minutes a day
But you can do.......
have him read to the dog, cat, fish, whatever.
Have him read the cookbook while you make something
have him read the crossword puzzle clues from the paper, then both of you try to answer them
have him look up things on the internet and read them to you, try dinosaurs, Mars, Mt Vesuvious
Read to him at night
Find books he really likes, my youngest was a good reader but didn't really enjoy it, then around 3rd grade found Harry POtter. He's read all 7 books three times now, he just started 5th grade.
Try nonfiction books.
Have him read the directions for something you buy.
Have him read the ingredients on the cereal boxes, OK no one can pronounce some of those words but after a couple boxes riboflavin will come pretty easy.

As for math, make it a game, while he does his math homework you do something, I would do the crossowrd puzzles or a wordfind. Can he get finished before you?
Math homework is something he will just have to bear. It is the bane of a child's existence, according to my 8th grade algebra daughter.
If it is that much too easy, have him tested and moved into a higher math level. Yes the school can do it. My 2nd grader went to the 5th grade class for math. Demand better education. I'm not saying have him moved into 5th, but he can go to 2nd or 3rd.

And I was so fed up with the schools I pulled my 2 youngest out, we now homeschool. ONe is on 5th, the other in 8th. And the 8th grader is the one in Algebra with "homework", work she does not finish in her math hour.

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What if you break up the homework and have him do the written work when he gets home and have him read to you after bath and before bed. Reading may help him to relax before bed and he may not feel so overwhelmed. I have to be honest I think when a young child is in school all day 40 minutes of additional schoolwork is so much to ask. Unfortunately, it is a sign of the times, school is giving more and more work to children. First grade work is now second grade work compared to when my kids were in grammar school. Homework isn't going to change so he has to learn that it is his responsibility to do it. However maybe he isn't one of those kids who can come right home and do it. Maybe he needs to have a snack, do his written work, play for a while, and then read later. There are going to be things in your sons life as you know he isn't going to like, but in reality life isn't perfect so I wouldn't worry about that, or focus on that. I know as a mom we all want our children to be happy but it isn't realistic. I also am not a believer in rewarding children for things they HAVE to do. Rewards should be given for acts of kindness etc. not for homework, or good behavior etc. Just my opinion.

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In general, what is your son's view of reading? Did he like it before school started this year? Or is this a new aversion?

While I love the idea of a teacher requesting that the kids read for homework, I wish somehow the kids didn't know the requirement was assigned. I wish the parents made the reading part of their expectations of growing up in their home. What had been your reading routine before he entered first grade?

I should think that a portion of the half hour could be a parent reading to the child, and the child reading aloud to the parent, though. Reading is so satisfying when it is a cuddly game of together time. Kids can obtain vocabulary and sentence fluency from listening aloud.

If you are in the habit of going to libraries and book stores, great. If not, take him to the library or book store and help him find books he likes. Stock up. Have you tried the Mercy Watson series?

If you haven't been reading together until now, build up his reading stamina. Start with five or ten minutes a night of your son reading to you, and you read the rest of the time to him. As he gets more accustomed to it, naturally let his time of reading aloud increase. This will give you a good understanding of his abilities and progress. The teacher may not be able to hear your child read aloud daily, but you can. That makes you your child's most important reading teacher. Monitor his growth. And no rewards system. Just smooches and hugs.

Read aloud to him at various times in the day. Say "hey, listen to this!" and read some interesting stories from the newspaper or news website. Read aloud stories from the sports section and get his reaction. Make it a conversation. Make reading a part of your home life together.

I wonder how he is doing in school this year. Ask for an appointment with the teacher now. Don't wait until parent-teacher conferences in October or November. What is the teacher's view of his reading? Is he showing resistance and dislike there as well?

As a high school teacher of English, I am honing in on the moment when kids start to dislike reading, and I am wondering what causes the distaste. I've got a class of BOY boys who all profess to hate reading. The seeds of this hate is much earlier than high school. Please do what you can to get through these years with your son loving to read.

The only way a child can continue to increase his reading level and ability is to read. Just because he is at grade level now does not mean he can coast. Reading can't just be a homework thing to do. It has to be everyday all year long to continue progress. Your son knows he needs to practice hitting the ball to get better. The same is true for reading. They lose the skill if they do not practice.

I've heard about teachers who have students sit on big yoga balls so that they can move while they are in school. See if sitting on a ball while sitting at a table reading helps. I'd love to hear the answer to that!

I wish you and your son the best. I'd love to hear an update on his progress.

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We have always read nightly so we save that for bedtime. It's sad that parents have to be told their children are required to read but if teachers just left to parents some kids would never pick up a book.
Are you including that 30 minutes in the 40? If you aren't that's too much for first grade. He should have spelling words, flash cards, and a worksheet and that shouldn't take 40 minutes.

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I'd have him do his 10 min. of written work when he gets home and let him go out and play. At bedtime have him read you a book about something he's interested in- I wouldn't worry about whether or not it's 30 min. I think it makes it feel like a chore to have timed reading instead of something enjoyable.
Best wishes =0)

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Face it, you're going to have to be miserable for a while, for the sake of your son and just reenforce that homework needs to be done before the fun. My experience has been if you let them off the hook and back off, they'll never learn to discipline themselves or develop a work ethic. Sure, 1st grade work is easy for him. He's lucky. But it is certainly no reason to back off on the workload or a reason to give in to his push back.

With that said, for your son, the ease can be a plus, right now. He can (you can) use this opportunity/time to focus on helping him build and develop good study habits. This is so important, because the work load and level of difficulty won't always be easy. The further along he goes in school, that work load and the expectations are inevitably going to increase. Those kids who master discipling themselves at an early age to knuckle-down, fare much better than their counterparts who shirk responsibilities saying they're bored or burned out.

His behavior should be alarming instead of exasperating. If he's doing this now, and you're ready to back down or let it slide while the workload is easy and the material simple, what will you both do when things kick into high gear in the next months or year to come?

If after the first grade ends, and he still finds things are too easy, that's when you start looking at ways to make lessons more challenging. Perhaps explore a gifted program, or homeschooling. But to me, it sounds like this is more of an attitude problem and power struggle, than an issue of the program fitting the child.

For now, I'd be sticking to my guns and make him tow the line. If you let him intimidate you over doing jobs that are an expectation, you're going to have real problems with school work and probably other issues later.

This isn't about him being all boy. All kids do this at some point. This is about teaching him responsibility and good habits, like brushing teeth, getting cleaned up every day, and doing chores around the house. You need to explain to him the importance of taking school work seriously, no matter how easy or boring because everything he does from here until graduation counts.

What does he want to do when he grows up? One of my sons wanted to be a police officer. I took him to the local police department when he was in the 2nd grade, and he was able to spend an afternoon with a few of the officers. They were fantastic! They explained how the work he's doing in school now applies to their adult jobs everyday.

My son hated writing papers and reports. They told him writing was very important since they had to write reports for every call, and those reports became important documents when and if cases had to go to prosecution. Everything they wrote mattered. My son's attitude about writing changed immediately.

The investigators showed him how important science and math was in the field and with crime scenes. He saw how they had to still go to "school" and had daily responsibilities and had to listen to their superiors and so on.

Once my son learned how things that seem silly right now really do matter, his attitude about school really changed.

Don't use toys and trinkets as a reason to get school work done. School is preparation for tommorrow. He needs to know and understand that. If he has purpose, he may be more invested in his work. Help him to set real goals and see if this approach is more effective. Kids know toys get broken...and most assume someone is going to get them what they want anyway. Maybe a mom and son career day is in order. Maybe explore and reasearch careers he's interested in and find out how his schooling now will get him to that goal. Does he know about college and which one he might want to go to? If not, take him to a local university football game and tell him how these kids were all into their homework...and will someday be doctors, lawyers, or even a professional ball player. But they wouldn't even be able to consider it if they didn't do their homework everyday because they wouldn't have had the skills to get into the school. You get the idea. Be creative.

He needs to know that school is the key to being able to be and do what he wants with his life in the future. Give him concrete examples...talk about college now...show him how short the time in school really is. Now days if he's not reading and writing at college level and most important isn't able to handle the work load when he's in middle school (which is now 6th grade - 8th grade---only 5 years from now), he probably will not be able to get into the school of his choice, let alone be able to pass the college entrance exams.

Good luck!

You need to just stand firm.

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If you are satisfied with his progress in reading, then focus mostly on the math. A worksheet is something concrete that he can measure when he's done. You could do an immediate reward such as an M&M for each problem completed.

For the reading, you could decrease the total time(with or without explaining this to the teacher), or split it up into shorter sessions over more days. All of my son's classes up to 4th grade so far only do 20 minutes of reading. I would have my son read for a few minutes before dinner, then again at bedtime. Or if he was getting tired, we'd take turns reading pages. I try to make sure it's something he enjoys reading, whether it's a funny book with mostly pictures, or a science book.

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School, homework, & play time is your son's "job" just like laundry, cooking, cleaning, dishes, etc. is your "job" as a mom. We all have things we don't like to do, but that is just part of life. I HATE cleaning the bathroom. So, if I put it off all day & dwell on it, then when I finally get around to cleaning it, then it seems to be make it that much more miserable. But, if I get it done in the morning, then I've got the rest of the day to do more fun things. The sooner your son realizes that we all have things in life that we have to do that aren't always fun or exciting, but that they have to get done. And if we get those "dreaded things" done right off the bat, then we've got a lot more time to do the things we enjoy.

My daughter is in 1st grade & she has a love/hate relationship to her homework. Once she starts to do it, she enjoys it, but she doesn't want to do it right away. We have found that if she doesn't do it (meaning the math or spelling worksheet) right away & I let her go play, it is a fight later on that night to get her to do it. So, as soon as she gets home, she washes her hands and has a snack. During that time we talk about her day at school. Then she gets out her worksheet & does it. After she's all done (less than 10 minutes) she gets to go play until dinnertime. After dinner, bath, teeth, etc., it is reading time. She reads to me & I read to her. I have her read a book or chapter of "her" book to me, then I'll read a chapter or two of the current book we're reading to her. Sometimes instead of playing, she wants me to read to her, so we'll go get snuggly on the couch, or pile all the pillows on my bed & get comfy, or we'll go out on the hammock & read. I've been reading the "Ramona" books & the "Magic Tree House" series to her. Sometimes I'll read the whole book to her in one sitting. It usually takes me 30 minutes to an hour depending on the book. By the time we're done, I'm sick & tired of reading. My jaw hurts from moving it, & my mouth is dry, and I'm 36! I can't imagine a 6/7 year old reading out loud for 30 minutes! That is crazy! My daughter is reading on a 3rd grade level & could easily read the "Magic Tree House" books to me, but I still read them to her.

In our school district, the actual homework amount that should be sent home is 10 minutes per grade. So, 1st grade = 10 minutes of actual homework (math, spelling, science, etc.), 6th grade = 1 hour of homework. Reading is above & beyond that amount of time. My daughter loves to read & have me read to her, so getting in the reading minutes is no big deal.

At the beginning of school, I spoke with my daughter's teacher. She said that she'd like the kids reading time to be at least 20-30 minutes a day. BUT, she also said that when the kids do their homework, if they read (out loud) their math worksheet while they're doing it, we should count it as part of their reading minutes. She also said that she'd like the kids to read at least half of the total minutes out loud to someone who reads much better than they do, but that the kids don't have to do all the reading themselves! She said that she'd rather have the kids LOVE reading and have the parents read to them some, then have the kids start thinking that reading is a chore & not fun at all.

Good luck!

Shellie

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I really would like to know, given his situation and your background as a teacher, what you believe is valuable about homework at this age. I'm not being helpful, I know, but maybe your advanced boy is smarter than the system.

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You have some great advice already and it has been addressed that "force him to do it" and "struggling to be positive". It sounds like you want to let him do whatever HE wants to do instead by being a push over. This is no favor to him even though it might feel like it at the time. As a mom it was/is my job to teach my daughter what is right: being in a car seat when she was young, activities, respect, manners, homework, bedtime, school responsibilities, home responsibilities and so much more. I wanted to drill it in early because it was going to minimize issues down the road, it has she is a hard working and very responsible 18 year old. I wasn't afraid to teach her routine and expectations at a young age and it can be done so easily with kindness and motivation.

She knew from K on that school was her "job" and took great pride in accomplishing what she needed to do. Maybe it had to do that I worked part of my day/night in my home office because I am in sales but she saw us doing our "homework"as well.

He can still have fun and participate in activities, they are not mutually exclusive. My daughter had tons of fun at this age but she knew what was her "job" as well.

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Well, if the main problem is the reading aloud for 30 minutes, why not have him do it before bedtime or while you're making dinner or something? Make it a little unorthodox and it might not *feel* so much like "homework" then.

Also, you can institute natural consequences: if he doesn't do his homework, then he doesn't get to go out to play - he'll figure out that the sooner he does what he HAS to do, the sooner he can get to what he WANTS to do. If he's going to be stubborn about it, park him at the table and tell him he may not get up until he's done his work (which is only 10 minutes, right? not counting the reading).

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Read 15 minutes right after school, another 15 before bed--then it doesn't seem as long.

Does he have to read something particular? If not, find books he loves and can enjoy reading--or read magazines, or comics, or the newspaper.

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I know you have heard a lot already, but I am in the same boat! I am a teacher with a 1st grade boy who hates homework. It's a lot of the repetitious stuff I hate, but I understand the purpose behind it. Since a lot of it is easy, I bet my son on how fast and how well he can finish something. Usually he thinks it will take an hour, but most often it takes about 5 to 10 minutes. When he's done, I ask him if this is his best work and if there is anything he would change? It helps him be reflective and to catch his mistakes. Good luck with the homework. Just think, you're preparing him to be self-sufficient in college. :)

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There is a time and an age... in which a child, learns that they must do what they need to do and must, even if they don't want to.
And if they don't want to, there are ramifications.
Such as, going to school, without it being completed.
Every kid, at a certain age and grade, learns this. That with many things... you just need to do what you need to do. Even if you don't want to. Like school, like work, like doing chores, like sleeping, like many things.

you might also see if his school has a 'gifted and talented' program.

Or, after he comes home from school, you let him unwind/have a snack. Then after that at a certain time, it is Homework time.
have a routine, for it.
Kids this age, cannot do time management on their own.

Boys are boys.
Girls are girls.
They each may have different levels of physicality and activeness and maturity. Still, there are things that needs to be done. And must be done.
And they can still be and have, their personality.
It is, blossoming, in another way. And learning, responsibility and it being about being proud, of themselves for doing their best. Whether something is hard or easy.

Or, is there another or different type of school he'd be better in? Or have him home schooled.
But even with that, there is... homework.
Homework, cannot be completely avoided. Because it is about studying. Whether in class or outside the classroom.

How.. is he, IN class? Does he do what he is supposed to do? Is he fine in class?

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I don't think the 30 minutes has to be in a row -- read for 10 minutes now, 10 minutes after dinner, and 10 before bed. And definitely include any reading you to do him.

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I've discovered that in my household, at least, giving my kids a few hours of "kid time" before we try to start homework helps. My son gets out of school at 2:35. We start homework between 4 and 4:30. My daughter, who is homeschooled, gets a break at the same time as her brother, and if she has finished her work for the day, she has to stay out of his way and not be a distraction until he is done. I've also made it very clear that once the homework is done, their time is their own.

Part of his problem may be the quality of the homework itself. If it's too easy for him, it can feel like arbitrary busy work, or even punishment, because he can't see a purpose for it other than to keep him from doing what he really wants to do with his time. Homework has no value if it is not consolidating information newly learned or providing needed review or practice. Would it help to talk to his teacher about how to make the homework itself more engaging?

In my house, we separate reading practice from homework time, and do our best to make it part of "fun time." If reading aloud for 30 minutes is not interesting to him (or wears out his voice, or tires him), maybe you could try trading pages. My son has mild speech issues, so reading aloud is a chore. We take turns reading pages to each other, and he loves it, because homework time has now turned into mommy time. We also play around with silly voices, and spend some of our reading time playing a what-if game, exploring what the characters might do in a different situation.

Although I think 40 minutes of daily homework is a bit much for a first grader, I would stay positive and not try to argue with the teacher over it. I agree with what someone mentioned about trying a different time of day. Maybe try reading 15 minutes in the morning and 15 minutes before bed. Math or other worksheet work right after an after school snack? Then as soon as it is finished, he can go outside to play. My youngest is in 4th grade. She doesn't struggle with the ability to do her homework, but she is slow because she gets distracted. It still helps to break it up in smaller chunks vs. doing everything after school. She always does her reading before bed.

Sounds like a normal (whatever that is) boy to me.
But know that if you put negative waves toward homework he will catch them.
Instead remind him that homework is a part of learning and reinforces school lessons. He may not like it but he still has to do it as that is part of school and growing up.

Count any reading he is PART OF in your total, and DON'T make it a chore. I think we are going to find a generation of kids who hate to read because it was such a chore to track it (I knew a kid who had to record the page numbers that he read...so much for relaxing before bed if you have to get up again to do that!). Any time that I read to my kids was part of their reading log. The teacher doesn't need the details. And I agree with the posts below, if it is the cereal box, the menu, signs at the zoo , billboards on the way home, it COUNTS.

I feel the same way as you. I think playing outside is way more important after 7 hours at school, than homework and education is very important to me. =) Anyway, try doing the homework right away to get it out of the way so he can have plenty of time to play. Maybe have him only read for 20 minutes instead of 30. ??? Just a thought. Good luck!!

Try a different time.

My own superactive boy HATED homewok after 7.5 hours of sitting in an 8 hour day. He NEEDED that time afterschool to meltdown for a bit, and then play.

So we did homework in the morning :P (ugh), and later "after" bedtime (aka he got to stay up in jammies). It was the ONLY way HW could work. Trying to force it was RUINING our relationship AND depriving him of an honest to god need (to be active).

Now we homeschool... so our days are "reversed". He has 6-10 hours a day of active things and 2-4 of school. I want to ay 'seatwork', but that's not correct... as very little of our school time requires seatwork.

ALSO (since I'm in school, too) I've recently discovered the Y's "kids university" or "afterschool programs" (he goes when I'm in class). It's an even split between 1 hour of homework time & 1 hour of playtime. Granted...it's 2 more hours he's GONE, but it'd two LESS hours you'd be fighting and damaging your relationship.

If we have to go back to awayschool for any reason we are SO doing this program! I want to be the mum whom he *shares* with, & looks forward to seeing... not fights/escapes. Parenting has enough battles I have to fight, that I will not willingly make HW one of them.

To ME education is only the SECOND most important aspect in life; because your education provides you a path to walk. The most important aspect, imho, are the relationships forged with family and friends; because they walk with you on that path / become your advisors and support structure throughout your life.

If he is to read for 30 minutes, I would set up a conference with the teacher because that is too long for a first grader to read everyday. Maybe she would consider reducing to ten minutes for now and work on building up as the year progresses. When I taught, I was always willing to work with parents to help fit the needs of their children. Good luck!

UGH, the dreaded reading logs! I think 30 min is too long for a 1st grader, of course he is getting frustrated. My son read well too so I only made him read 15 min. He didn't know how much time he actually read so I told him he read 30 min. That way he isn't being taught to deceive (only I knew) and he still did his homework and the 'fighting to do it' was minimal.

But one thing that raised a red flag in your post is, "I don't want to force him to do it, which is the just of it. It is so hard to get him to do anything he doesnt' want to do" - you need a grip on this. It doesn't matter that he doesn't want to do it - he has to do it. What if one of your students said, "I don't want to do it!" Would you just shrug your shoulders and say "okay, you don't have to?" OR if a student brought in a note from a parent saying "my son didn't want to do his homework, please excuse him from it". You need to nip this in the bud or you are in for a long ride.......

My son is 2nd grade now and the 1st grade homework wasn't that difficult. They sent the homework home once a week and they had different things to do each day. We would have him start his homework when we got home while cooking dinner and he might do two days worth so that the next day he only had to read. We actually only did 10 minutes at first each day reading, then went to 15 minutes, and now he is 20 minutes each day. I would recommend do lesser amounts. Most kids can't sit still for 30 minutes to read, I know my son doesn't. Try doing the homework right after school if possible, then do the reading right before bed so it isn't all lumped together. Then let him play for a little while as well. I am sure you could find a plan that works best for you. Good luck.