Okay, I am going to base this on what we did and still do for my son who has mal-formed Eustachian tubes which cause him to be so very prone to ear infections. Before I tell you this though, let me tell you that the American Medical Association found out 3-4 years ago that taking something to dry up the runny nose that often accompanies an ear infection actually thickens the fluid behind the eardrum making it harder to drain. So, in essence, we actually prolonged his ear infections while clearing up his nose.
You should be on an antibiotic. That is a no brainer. You have an infection behind your ears and it is in a perfect location to grow and multiply. If your doctor did not give you antibiotics, call him back and get him to prescribe you some. For the nasal drainage, STEAM and Vicks, we did also use the over the counter nasal decongestants until we found out that they actually made the ear infection worse and longer. After that, we relied on steam and Vicks only. Once he was older and would actually try it, we even gave him those Listerine breath strips and had him breathe through his nose and keep his mouth closed while they disolved. Another thing that will REALLY open up the sinuses (but I do not recommend for young or youngish children) is to take a piece of horseradish root (about the size of a pinky nail and about as thick as 4-5 sheets of paper) and chew that up with you mouth closed and breathing through your nose. You do not have to swallow it, but chew it up well and BREATHE while you are chewing it. Depending on your level of congestion, it may take a bit more horseradish root and/or several "doses" to get you opened up. I know that when I have used it, it keeps me open for the entire day and sometimes I am even lucky enough to wake up clear.
I would NOT recommend that you put anything in your ears. The reason for this is because when your ears have fluid behind them, they can rupture from the inner pressure. It can be painful (my son is so used to it, that it is "old hat" to him and no longer as painful). Sure the ear will then drain. However, if you introduce water into the inner ear, it can cause permanent hearing loss. My son has permanent hearing loss from chronic and constant ear infections. He is missing most of one eardrum and once we get through this growth spurt, he will again have eardrum replacement surgery.
Another thing that helps for pain is to apply heat to the ear. It does not have to be that hat, but just warm enough to feel better. They used to recommend alternating cold and warm compresses. Do NOT use a cold compress. Think about water. Cold=ice. Warm=water. You definitely do NOT want to thicken up the fluid behind the ear and a cold compress will do that. If you do not have a heating pad with a low setting, wet a washcloth with hot water and put it in a plastic bag and apply to the ear(s).
Also, ephedrine and psuedo-ephedrine were designed for NASAL congestion, not for ear congestion. So, with your ears being congested as well, I would try anything to decongest the nose that does not contain ephedrine. It will thicken up the fluid behind the ear and cause more ear pain.
I hope some of this has been helpful to you. Another place you can look for some remedies that may be helpful is a local independent healthfood store (not a chain like GNC). Oh! One more thing. I would try to lay off as much dairy as you can until your sinuses are better, at least. Dairy will create a film over everything it touches. If you do not believe that, drink a glass of water and then a glass of milk and notice how different your throat feels. I am in no way saying to eliminate dairy products - I am a cheese lover and cannot fathom no cheese in my diet. However, I have noticed that eliminating it until I get rid of the infection, does indeed speed up healing. Go figure. If you are suffering from larangytis, you can go to GNC and get some tea called Throat Coat and that will actually get rid of the "coat" on your throat, so that you can regain your voice. You will want to have the sugar and/or lemon and honey on hand because the tea tastes not very good at all. I had a customer tell me about this when I had lost my voice for several days due to allergies. With just two cups of the tea, my voice was back 100%.
Again, I hope some of this has been helpful to you and you are well in no time. I know that it really bites. We had a major episode here at home just two weeks ago.