12 answers

"Does My Newborn Dislike Her Daddy"

I have a newborn that when her daddy feeds her she gets really fussy right after or she sleeps for a little bit and then wakes up fussy, she really doesn't do this to me when I feed her but if I take her from him she practically stops fussing? Does this mean she doesn't like her daddy? What is wrong? Any input would be appreciated. thanks

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Featured Answers

My daughter preferred me over daddy for a long time. It is fine! She is showing preference now, and it will change again. Until then, lap it up!
Christa

More Answers

I don't think babies are capable of like or dislike. Watch to see if he is holding her correctly or burping her enough. My son-in-law (not understanding the difference) allowed my grandson to suck on the empty bottle getting air in his tummy. He didn't realize that sucking on an empty bottle was not the same as sucking on his binky. As soon as my daughter found out about it she explained it to him and he understood. We as a society don't teach our men and boys even the basics of infant care. I have seen inexperienced men put diapers on backward and all kinds of funny things that come from inexperience. Many men are terrific loving fathers and love caring for their children they just don't know the basics.

I'm sure she doesn't dislike her daddy, she just isn't used to him yet. Give it some time and she will adjust.

Hi J.,
As everyone else has already explained, your baby does not dislike her daddy, just isn't used to him. As the mother and primary caregiver (in most instances) your baby knows you and even more importantly you know your baby. The more you spend time, the easier it is to pick up on what your baby is communicating. The only way for dad to get into the "hang" of things is for him to spend lots of time with his little one.

One other thing that I didn't see mentioned is the attitude of dad (or anyone else) who is holding your baby and how the baby can detect it. Our now 4 month old cries more often when his dad holds him and usually calms down immediately when I hold him. I think a lot of it has to do with dad being very easily frustrated and apprehensive with holding the baby. Our little one spit up alot when he was new and it took a few weeks to find the right formula for him. In that time, dad got spit up on quite a bit and now I think that apprehension is still there, causing tension. When our baby is in a good mood and dad is with him, all is well, but if it's feeding time, both don't handle it well. Again, just more time will eliminate this and make it smoother for all.

We had the same issue when our now 10 year old was a newborn she would be real fussy and we realized she mostly did it when my husband came home from work. We think she didn't like the smell of his work on him because if he took a shower before he held her she was fine. Could that be a possibility or maybe even his cologne? Its worth a try.

That's got to be hard for both of you, but it doesn't mean she doesn't like him! It will get better, as long as you continue to give him chances to bond with her.

No way. She's just more used to you and your smell and sounds. She'll get more comfortable with him as she gets older.

no it does NOT mean she does not like her daddy. shes just more used to the sound of your voice and your body after being in it for 9 months you know? dont EVER get personally hurt over what a baby does. they only know what they know, and they have needs and they cry... and you know, its really normal for baby to not want anyone but mom to hold them.

that doesnt mean that dad cant try and stuff. he definatly shuold. she will get used to it. they call the first 3 months after birth the 4th trimester because babies are SO immature and they simply dont understand that mom is a separate person. their brains and understanding is really immature. so just handle with caution, and sensitivity! :D and dont let dad get discouraged! :D it will be ok!

Maybe she just needs to get used to his smell. I would have him hold her and snuggle her more often. There's no way a 10 day old baby doesn't like her daddy! She loves him, she's just really tiny and adjusting to life outside the womb.

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