Do You Live a "Simple" Life?

Updated on July 10, 2013
O.H. asks from Phoenix, AZ
33 answers

We try to live a simple life. Low stress, focus on God, family and friends. Little to no debt and pay cash for everything. On the rare occasions that we buy something new, we NEVER pay full price for it and most things are bought "gently used". We do our best to remove negative people and things from our lives as well as limit the drama that tends to creep up. We have our tough times (my husband's crazy ex constantly fights with him) but have learned to pick our battles and things have generally gotten better for us. We were also hit financially pretty hard by our divorces and economy so we have ZERO money saved and are trying to come back from that. We are Christians and maybe that is some of it that makes it better. But I see friends and family around us that seem to be in a constant struggle so I was wondering who else feels like that have a pretty good life because of the choices they have made?

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So What Happened?

I didn't ask this to come across as better than anyone else. In fact, I have 3 kids who are spec needs, yes, been divorced, also have had deaths to deal with, major losses in other ways, family sickness, and live check to check, etc. My point was that we choose to live "simply", maybe to help with those times that come up and are hard to deal with. I was just asking if any others do the same.

Featured Answers

V.B.

answers from Jacksonville on

I don't know that "simple" is how I would describe my life, nor would "simple" equate to "happy." I live a contented life. And that is all about how you view things, not what you are looking at.

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D..

answers from Miami on

I didn't take it that you were bragging. I took it that you have come out of hard times and are choosing a wiser way to live. (Wiser for YOU.)

I think that the term "simple" is totally relative. What is my simple is probably complicated to others. What is important is that it works for you.

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O.O.

answers from Kansas City on

Simple isn't about finances.
You can have a good income, no debt and live simply.

For me "simple" means living IN the moment, not dwelling on "somedays."

It's wanting what you have and it's about contentment.

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V.P.

answers from Columbus on

My first thought when I read questions such as these is "why does this question need to be asked?" If you're happy with how you live, then that's wonderful. Do you need confirmation that it's right by polling others? Why do you care how other's live? Your explanation that you see others struggle because they've made different choices than you simply comes across as condescending, whether or not you mean it to. Many who are not Christian also get along just fine. Many who make different choices get along just fine. I think Jo's answer (Flaming Turnip) was spot on.

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J.C.

answers from New York on

Nope - not at all. I live a complex and stressful life. But it's the way I choose to live. I could not work, get a much smaller house and never buy a new bag, go out to eat, take awesome vacations, drive a new and reliable car - but that is not the life for me. I'm too high maintenance for it.

But I do respect your choices - sometimes I wish I could be more simple in many ways - but I wouldn't be happy.

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B..

answers from Dallas on

Oh boy.

I know so many people who make the best choices possible, and still have might struggles. Struggles, can come from anywhere. Don't give yourself much credit, you are simply lucky so far. You will go through something in your life, and feel foolish for thinking your choices are responsible for your good fortune. They are only a part. You will learn that some day, probably.

Have I personally made "good choices?" For the most part, I think I have. We do actively try to live a "simple life." Life hasn't always been easy. A lot of times, it has. I don't feel responsible for that. God has quite the sense of humor, you know.

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B..

answers from Dallas on

I try. Doesnt happen. Too many outside factors. Kids need to go to college.
People get sick. Went to get a simple oil change Monday and the air filter housing was broken, $200 later, it didn't turn out simple.
Our choices only take us so far.

Life happened. And the older you get, the more you have collected other people who effect your life and if you care about them, the things that effect them, will effect you. And in ways you can't do anything about.

Except pray. Your faith will grow by trial. If life stayed simple, we'd think we had the world by the tail and we could handle anything. Listen, I am in my early 50s and I understand the world can kick my butt any day, any time.
But I lean on God and ask for his mercy.

I understand that people's choices can significantly effect their lives. I don't understand inviting chaos into families.

I just know sometimes it bursts through the door uninvited.

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C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

Faith:

A simple life means different things to different people.

Like you, we have a focus on God and family. We are a cash only family as well.

Life is about choices and decisions. And it's about perception too. I have made my share of bad choices in my life. But those same bad choices, made me who I am today.

There are some things in life that people do NOT have a choice on (cancer, job loss due to economy, etc.) and they deal with it as best they can. For us, when my husband was unemployed for 10 months, we found who are true friends were and those were along for the ride.

I feel that god gives us struggles in life - so that we know the difference between the good times and the bad times - and also God shows us that others have it worse, and yes, some have it better. I've learned not to be envious of those who have it better...because just like me, they have their own struggles.

Man...I'm rambling sorry.

Do I feel like I have a good life? yes. I am blessed with a good husband that loves me, respects me and provides for us. He also blessed with me two beautiful boys (one who just turned 11 today!!). I have a daughter that is grown. I have the best parents one could ask for! Yes, I am sure I am biased.....overall God has shown me a lot in my life...I can't wait to see what else He wants to show me!!!

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A.L.

answers from Las Vegas on

I get what you mean and to answer your question, yes, in my household we do live a simple life... We don't rack up credit card debt, house is paid off (due to us making sacrifices of not eating out and other things) ... we aren't a household that has to have new electronic gadgets all the time or have a child that requires the latest fashion and styles.. However, apart from the material aspect of things, I tend to think that simple (which for me equates to no drama and being happy on the inside) is a matter of perspective... and from a Buddhist's perspective, I believe that it's our delusions of anger, resentment, self-pity, self-cherishing, etc ... are what contribute to our unhappiness.. I can't say I don't have these feelings at times, I definitely do. However, I tend to think that if I can eventually do away with these delusions of the mind, then life becomes even more simple and joyful...

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C.C.

answers from San Francisco on

We live a good life. Like you, we have no debt, are able to pay with cash on hand for all of our needs, and we also tend to buy used things when possible/practical. We are not religious. We own our own company, and there is nothing simple about that most days - but our business is growing, and our customers are happy with our work, so that's great. Not having others (deities, employers) in charge of our lives has actually simplified matters for us, I think.

That being said, none of us can congratulate ourselves for our good choices, or berate ourselves for bad choices, either, because half of any decision is luck. You make the best choices you can at the time with the information you have on hand. I don't judge people who are worse off than I am financially, because if any individual choice I'd made along the line had been different, I might be in that position myself. You just never know what the future holds.

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C..

answers from Columbia on

I think choices only take you so far. I think perspective takes you the rest of the way.

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S.J.

answers from St. Louis on

I love this question.

We have a great income and we still live simply. We could "afford" to go and buy brand new cars, a bigger house, etc. We don't. We like it that way, at least for now. I am far more concerned about never having to bounce back from another disaster than having a bigger guest room or newer SUV. Now, that doesn't mean I don't have my "splurges". We wanted a new rug, I got a really nice one. I want a new handbag? I go buy one for $350 and don't think twice (then I use it for 5 years). So simple, yes, completely devoid of fun, no.

We make our own laundry detergent. We eat in almost every meal. We never pay full price for anything. My husband is the definition of frugal. If I told you our income, you would be floored that we live this way. Again, we like it =)

When you describe being hit hard by a divorce, health issues, etc., that never has to happen again. If more people lived simply and planned for disasters, well, there would be far fewer "disasters" - they would then just be life, a little set back, but totally doable.

It is crazy to me how my friends with far less income than my husband and me live. Brand new cars, newer homes, constant eating out, shopping, vacationing. I gently try to tell them about Dave Ramsey and how our lives will be great because of our planning, and NEVER in a judgmental way, but it doesn't seem to stick. I just hope they never have a disaster, because if they do, it won't be doable......

I don't see your post as "better than" at all. I haven't read all of the responses to know who ever said that but wow is that odd.

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T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

"Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans."
I keep things "simple" by controlling what I can control, staying away from negative people, spending money responsibly, not having too much "stuff."
But regardless of the choices I make, life has a way of getting complicated and messy.
I have two teenagers and a twenty year old, so I'm forced to deal with their often less than perfect choices every day.
My husband's business is solid, but VERY vulnerable to market forces, so that's always a concern.
People I love and care for have problems, health issues, whatever, and that affects me deeply. I have a hard time being at peace when people I love are suffering.
I guess it's hard to define "simple" because it's different for everyone. I have an uncle who would probably describe his life that way (life long renter, no car, no possessions of any real value, clothing and shoes are worn completely through before being replaced) but to me he lives like a bitter, lonely recluse, and that's not something I'd ever aspire to.
Also I LIKE nice things. I don't want or need a lot, but if I really want something, and I can afford it, I don't hesitate! Beautiful things, and experiences (like travel) are enriching and absolutely have a place in my life.

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M.C.

answers from Chattanooga on

I feel like I have a pretty good life.

We may be struggling to make ends meet, but we have food on the table every night. Not all families do.

I have a beautiful, healthy daughter. I have not had to face nearly the amount of struggles with conception or health issues many parents have to face.

My husband isn't perfect, and we have our share of problems, but I have no doubt that he loves me for the person I am.

My life is far from perfect, and it definitely isn't a "simple" one. It has highs and lows, and we definitely struggle, no matter what decisions I make.

But my life is good. :)

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J.B.

answers from Houston on

I understand what you're saying. We try and it can be a struggle. My wife is a bit closer to God than I am (that's my struggle) and I can see the peace it brings her.
We have scaled way back in the past year for personal reasons and some long term goals we have set.
I have an ex that is a button pusher, but like y'all I've learned to pick my battles.
I do think a close relationship with God brings peace of mind. I'm still working on it. Good question.

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

I think it's really a matter of perspective, to be honest. There are many people who live very, very simply and eat beans and tortillas nearly every day. I can't compare with that.

We live frugally, but don't stress about it. We don't have cable, but do frequent the local independent video store as we like to keep our dollars in the neighborhood when we can. I am fairly content, unless PMS or a sore back (which has been the theme of this summer) are bugging me out. We have easy friendships for the most part, have distanced ourselves from family drama. I don't mind public transport/walking so we have a financial advantage of being a one-car family. We have chosen to keep our family small for reasons which were true to us as a couple.

I could go on, however, I'll just say this: simple is a matter of perception. I certainly have more resources in my life now at 42 than I did during my first thirty years. I know that a lot could change if something happened-- natural disaster, illness, job loss, etc. So, I really feel that --for right now-- I have a pretty blessed life. Not because I 'deserve' it ..I'm not religious, so there's no piety or theology behind that statement-- just an awareness of the diversity of what 'simple' is amongst those I know and those in other parts of the world. I just try to be happy with what we have and to appreciate how good my life is here, now.

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G.♣.

answers from Springfield on

Our family could really be better with our finances! But we have made some change, and we are getting better. My husband has a much more carefree attitude about money, so it never caused him much stress. I, however, worry about money. So I'm feeling much better now than I did when we were first married.

Personally, I believe having a faith life is a huge part of this. I think finances are important, but I think you really hit the nail on the head when you talked about your faith life.

I feel very blessed that my husband and I both come from strong, Catholic families. I do like being Catholic (for the most part), but it's not about that. It's about being from the same background. It really makes a difference. Now, if we could just see eye to eye politically ...

I try to lead a very Christian life, but I don't often talk about it. I believe very strongly in the quote "Preach the Gospel at all times, and when necessary, use words." I'm not secretive about my faith at all. I'm open, and I'm definitely open to conversations and questions. I just try to be respectful of others' beliefs.

I don't look down on anyone who isn't religious, but I do feel sorry for them. I think they are missing out on something that can really make their lives happier and less stressful. I think our faith supports us and comforts us when we need it, it challenges us when we need to get off our butts and do better and it celebrates with us. I think it makes a big difference!

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J.T.

answers from New York on

Yes - I think we do live a relatively simple life. We do buy things new but we can easily afford to. What we don't do is take on everything we can afford. ie: a vacation home. A friend wants one so badly and while we can afford one, I have no desire to take on another home to deal with. I think it's much simpler to rent when we need to. I'm a believer in biting off less than I can chew. So I don't have my kids in 100 activities and then complain we're so busy. I stopped at 2 children bc they seemed healthy and I wouldn't have easily handled a 3rd. So I quit while things were manageable for me. Overall we live well below our means which makes for very little financial stress. And I constantly purge our house to keep it clutter free. We stay close to home a fair amount on weekends so our weekends are simple. We do go out to eat but that's not stressful... I also see people who seem to constantly struggle and it's either bc they overspent and now need to pay for it all or they schedule so many social things that they're exhausted. We socialize a lot too but I keep it sane. But what none of us can ensure stays simple is good health. That can throw a wrench into everything. So you never know what's around the corner. Someone could get into a horrible car accident today and everything changes. The older I get, the more I think how it can all be gone in an instant...

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A.C.

answers from Madison on

Yes, we've been doing this for the past few years. Trying to make sure we have no debt; we have our credit cards paid off and pay them in full every month (well, other than mine at the moment, as I used it to pay for a course I'm currently taking. But I not only pay off what I put on the card every month, I also have a set amount of "extra" money I pay that goes toward paying down that debt).

My husband and I are very much going for the downsizing or minimalist type of living. We have just started doing this--getting rid of things we don't use. We donate old clothes, stuff we don't want, to places like Good Will and Savers (Easter Seals). Books go to the library, either for the library to use or to sell to raise money. I keep a list of what we donate so we can get a tax break at tax time. We try hard to buy what we need on sale, and we only buy what we need--we barely ever buy "wants" anymore.

Living this way allows us to afford to eat better/organically and use supplements and exercise and food to keep ourselves healthy. Preventive healthcare is expensive, but in the long run, one of the best things we can do for ourselves.

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S.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I get where you're coming from. While I'm not religious, over the past three years there have been some difficult circumstances out of my control in my life. I've done what I can to simplify. Now we have no credit card debt, and we live in a small home - which means less possessions, less expense, less cleaning, less worry, and more time together!

I always try to choose carefully when I buy, and try to buy second-hand goods. While we have not much money, I do feel happy about our situation. I love, love, love having family close and around - it's the best feeling in the world to be part of a good thing like that. Sticking to a budget can actually be an enjoyable challenge, which I have found can bring my husband and I closer to each other.

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

I have a pretty good life, despite a lot of challenges.
Some of the things that have happened have been due to my own good or bad choices, some due to the effects of other's people's choices on my life, some just dumb random luck (good and bad).
I have debts, and I'm paying them down. I have no savings (ex ate all that up paying for one rehab program after another), but I have a home for me, my daughter, and our animals and we all eat on a daily basis.
My car and my daughter's truck are paid for.
I have friends and family who love me, and I have the opportunity to participate in activities I love, such as community theatre.
I don't shop recreationally - it's probably a good thing that I hate to shop. Makes it easier to avoid spending money I can't afford.
We eat simply, and I can make a good meal on the cheap.
I don't pray, and I don't do religion, I just do what feels right, and it all seems to work itself out, even if that means just squeaking by.

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J.G.

answers from Chicago on

I'm trying to live a simple life, but it's hard. I have started a daily meditation practice ( I'm an atheist), and I am in th process of reevaluating the people and activities in our lives. The kids and I start the day by saying what we are thankful for, and we end each day by highlighting something good that happened to us each day.

In terms of choices, marrying hubby was fhe best thing i ever did. I regret my career path at the moment, but I'm working on correcting that.
I'm super close to paying off my student loans, and soon we will have no car payments. Savings looks good, but we do need a bigger house since we added another kid to the mix. I coupon, cook smart, buy clothes on clearance racks, etc.

With that said, we do not live a simple life. Our house is filled with stuff --mostly books-- and we have lots of stress caused by lots of activities, etc. we also like to use credit to our advantage, and I can't understand cash only households.hubby and I get at least a grand back in rewards every year. We pay off our debt without interest --save for mortgage, car, and student loan, but I make 4 extra car payments every year, two extra mortgage, and I pay almost a third more on the student loan every month. We are fortunate that hubby makes a good living, but it would be nice if he was around more.

I like the appeal of the "simple life" philosophy, but I'm a materialistic ex punker just trying to suck as much joy out of this life as possible, and sometimes that means making things messy and complex.

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A.B.

answers from St. Louis on

Hi!
I like your post; it is very interesting and it doesn't bother me a bit.
I would say that we have a good life and enjoy simple things; we don't have debts and we buy what we actually need. I don't need to buy new clothes or new shoes every time I go out, my kids do not whine for new toys every time we go to the store, and we don't feel the need to dine out every single weekend,etc.
I love my home, and the way we live; we try to eat healthy and we exercise a lot, including my kids. In summary, malls, shopping centers and restaurants are not part of our lives, and these are exactly where lots of money goes in many households (besides mortgage, car's monthly payments, groceries and entertainment). One thing that we don't give up but we save for is travel.
Living a simple life , it is just a matter of choice; it is a matter of spending wisely, and enjoy spiritual or non material things. We made that choice in some way, and still we have everything we need and may be more.
Kudos for you!
A. :)

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A.P.

answers from Washington DC on

Yes, other people are doing well based on their individual choices.

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K.I.

answers from Los Angeles on

We try out best! We also have no CC debt, own our car outright, we only buy with cash....we don't do gently used but we do generally go 'middle of the road'...no top of the line for us!

Our savings got wiped out on a stupid rental property (my hubby bought my sis a house..,BIG mistake!! We took a bath on it.,.that saying of not mixing family & $ is very true)... So we are starting over & trying hard to live the 'waste not, want not' lifestyle!!!!

~Don't let negative people in...I got what you were asking & you didn't sound holier than tho, to me!!!

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

I guess it depends on what you mean by "simple." I do not live a low stress life. I overextend in every direction, because you only live once. If I have one kid who wants to play hockey and another wants to box and another wants to play basketball and another take art classes, we make it happen. If I want to teach Sunday school and be the PTA treasurer and host Thanksgiving and work two jobs, I do. Sometimes it gets crazy and out of balance and when it does, we scale back, collect ourselves and figure out what needs to change.

I do feel that we have a pretty good life, but it's not a simple one.

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J.D.

answers from Cincinnati on

Probably not as simple as I would like to but am working on it. I'm finally able to start saving. I like my life but it could use improvement. I've been working on not talking about people especially at work. I've learned to stop juding people because unless I've walked in someone elses shoes, I have no right. I have currently decided to leave work at work. We don't have expensive things. no cable but have Netflix, eating in more, hang with friends almost every week. no drama.

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S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

We live a simple life. We have a modest home, we only buy what we can pay for, we never pay full price, we do not buy top of the line, we buy a lot of second hand, we eat most meals at home, we do not indulge in expensive hobbies and we vacation close to home (camping and beach). I like the motto "be happy with what you have and you'll have plenty to be happy about."

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C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

We try to live simply and we succeed in some ways and don't in others. We have no drama in our lives. We mostly just do fun family things all together. We hardly eat out...I like to cook our meals so that saves a lot of money. We have one car and my husband rides his bike to work. Our car is pretty old but in good shape. We keep our bills to a minimum. I work 10 to 15 hrs a week so most of the time I am with the kids. We have no TV but we do watch movies on Netflix sometimes. We are not shoppers. We get hand me downs or go to thrift stores or look for sales if we really need something. All our fun on the weekends is camping, hiking, rock climbing, or biking with the kids and sometimes friends join us. We are outside a lot. I volunteer at two different places and we give to 4 different charities of our liking. We are not religious. We are doing fine financially.

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J.O.

answers from Detroit on

Well, I'm not sure what simple means. It could be defined in many ways. It's high stress chasing 5 kids. We don't have debt. But we do buy everything new; I love good sales, though. I feel fortunate and certainly not that we're living a complicated life.

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❤.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Yes, I feel we live a simple life.
Modest home (chose not to upgrade when we had a chance. Good thing
as I am currently a SAHM).
We do not have extravagances.
We don't eat out, don't use credit cards, pay cash for anything we buy, do
not take extravagant vacations. We've pared down on all of our "fun $",
got rid all extras on cable, pared down our cell phone bills etc.
We did this first out of necessity but now it's just become a way of life.
Have a bit in savings. Not much but we'll grow it when we I go back to
work.
We do not take expensive vacations right now. We only go to local getaways.
We work hard to pay off our cars so we don't have a payment (my husb
hated his ex-wife's extravagances & waste of money.).
We did and do make good choices. We've seen so many families buy houses bigger than they can afford that have lost them. It's so sad. My
husb has made sure we are live w/i our means and can pay our bills. That is always first & foremost. We try to save our money instead of buying expensive cars & furniture.
We always look for a deal, buy cheaply when we can (when it does not
compormise the integrity of the product etc).

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M.S.

answers from Salinas on

I am not sure exactly what you mean by "simple" but I would not describe my life that way, nor would I want it to be that way (as I define simple). To me "simple" means just living day to day without challenging yourself or growing, making things as easy as possible. My husband and I both work full time because we WANT to (gasp!) and we both do volunteer work in the community and for our kids' school. Our kids each have 3-4 activities/clubs/sports going on year round. We take family vacations out of the country and small day or weekend trips locally. We do these things to stimulate ourselves, grow, explore, learn, and experience life. You only get one!

R.X.

answers from Houston on

I do see your post as sanctimonious but rather as a guide that people who are struggling with finances can use. Yes, I live a simple life. Thrift store clothing and road trips rather than flying when I need to visit my home roots.

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