Do You Judge Moms Who Have Plastic Surgery/cosmetic Procedure?

Updated on April 10, 2012
M.R. asks from Allen, TX
40 answers

Like boob jobs, filler in lips, botox? Do you judge if done tastefully?

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

Not at all! If something is extreme or looks ridiculous, then yeah I'll judge but a little help? Nah...I'd love a boob job and a tummy tuck!

5 moms found this helpful

A.G.

answers from Houston on

I have two friends to get their boobs done, one flaunts them one doesn't .

Guess which one I judge?

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C.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Are you kidding me, I'd get a "mommy makeover" today if I could! All the treadmill and yoga classes in the world have done nothing for my saggy post-baby boobs or the extra skin on my tummy. :( And let's face it, the sands of time have not been kind to my thighs either. Yep, the only judging I'm doing is being jealous of the mamas who have been able to get their mommy makeover done already! :) More power to them.

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E.D.

answers from Seattle on

Now, I'll be the first to admit, when my sister was was about to have her breast implants put in, I was up on my high horse looking down. And I said as much.

"Blah, blah, blah, how could you do this to your body, blah, blah, blah, commercialism and sexism, blah, blah, blah, self mutilation," and so on and so forth.

She said, "I like boobs, Ephie. I think they are beautiful and amazingly fun. I've always wanted big boobs, not for anyone else but because I like the way they look, move, and feel, and now I'm going to have them."

It changed my mind, right there and then.

Well, and why not? Breasts ARE lovely, in my opinion. Think about how many sculptures, paintings, poems, or photos are created to capture their likeness. And what else do we do to our bodies to shape them in the image we find most beautiful.

I suppose I think of plastic surgery as a way to sculpt ones own image. Perhaps it's not MY bag, but then again, my own tastes are not the same as some others and that's just fine. I have altered my body in other ways. I have tattoos, for example. They serve no function apart from aesthetic presentation.

I admit, I don't always think women/men look very beautiful after their procedures. But as long as they do, that's what is important.

And also. I really wish our culture appreciated the beauty of an aging body. While it is up to our own selves to define beauty for ourselves, I think it is a shame that we value a worn and wise body less than a young and firm one. Just my own thoughts on the matter. I think my mother is one of the most beautiful women on the planet. She has wrinkles around her eyes, her belly is shows she is a mother, and her hair has grey streaks. But I'll tell you what, she is graceful, kind, intelligent, wise, and sexy as all get out.

8 moms found this helpful

C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

No, why should I? it's their body.

I feel sorry for some of the people who have had their lips "filled" to look like Angelina Jolie - they end up looking like clown lips - even that actress - oooh dear what is her name? She was on Dancing with the Stars? she got it done and now she's not pretty to me anymore.

I would LOVE to have a boob job and keep my DDs well-firm and high!!! Not your place to judge either.

I feel sorry for the people who are addicted to plastic surgery. It's sad. But that's THEIR LIFE. THEIR MONEY.

7 moms found this helpful

C.P.

answers from Columbia on

If it's done tastefully, you shouldn't even notice that they've had it unless they tell you.

A good breast augmentation looks natural. As does lip plumping and Botox.

If it's obvious that they've had "work done," it's usually not tasteful. I don't really judge them, but I do kind of pity them because they have to live with themselves looking that way.

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T.R.

answers from San Francisco on

Yes and no as it really depends on the person and the true reason for the procedure. Is it strictly out of vanity? Is it for self esteem? Did she just loose a ton of weight and is it cosmetically necessary?

I am a little leary of fillers and botox as I want to see those that are daring enough to try it in 5 years.

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M.E.

answers from Chicago on

As long as they don't look like the Housewives of Beverly Hills, who cares?

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A.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I too would like to say I do not...but I do. I only judge when I think it went way too far...lips too big, boobs so big that they look ridiculous. I judge when it's for "show".

I don't judge those who were overweight and had tummy tucks, those who had nose jobs because of broken noses. I have a broken nose, one side I can barely breath through...but I'm too scared to get surgery for it...(plus i can't afford it).

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K.M.

answers from Chicago on

I only question their decision when they share financial information with me that makes me question their decision in a financial way. I have a friend we will call B and she and her husband have NO CLUE how to handle money - should she go and get work done I would judge but only because I know they can not affoard it. I do not care if anyone I know gets work done it's their choice - and if you do not complain about your finances to me then I have no clue if you can/can not thus I can not judge :)

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

Can't judge someone for doing what I'd like to!

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B.

answers from Augusta on

I think it depends on why it was done as well.
Is is necessary or is it just for looks . I mean what kind of message is she sending to her children? you need to change yourself so others will like you? You need to change your self so you can attract the attention of a man? You need to change yourself FOR a man?

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I.X.

answers from Los Angeles on

Not if I can't tell they've had something done which is the point of good plastic surgery. Especially if its a tummy tuck after twins. But yes, I always judge duck lips and bad face lifts. Can't help it. It seems desperate and sad.

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T.K.

answers from Dallas on

No. More power to em.

3 moms found this helpful

A.J.

answers from Williamsport on

Guilty! But not if it's done so well that I'm surprised when I find out about it. In other words, if it's tasteful, it means I can't tell. Because any trace of evidence is not tasteful (especially lips and botox-no one seems to pull that off without a hitch) For instance, one friend has a boob job, and I had no idea until she told me. Before she told me, I just thought she had a God given awesome figure. After she told me, I was jealous and impressed :)
But I'm way more impressed with healthy natural ladies.

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R.A.

answers from Providence on

Nope. I just know it ain't for me.

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M.D.

answers from Dallas on

I'd be a liar if I said I didn't. I do feel a tummy tuck is okay though, don't have one but want one... but I feel as a society we've become to vein about getting old. What's so wrong to show your age? Don't get me wrong, I'm guilty of my own standards... I color my hair or it would all or 80% I feel would be gray and I'm only 38...

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K.H.

answers from Indianapolis on

I try not to. I do judge someone when they have 'work' done at the expense of their family. If your pediatrician refuses to see any of your 4 kids because you owe them so much money or the orthodontist refuses to take your kids braces off because you haven't paid ANY of your bill and your water, TV, phone and cable are shut off, but you go ahead and have the work doney anyway, then yes, I judge. I actually saw this happen and was disgusted.

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M.P.

answers from San Francisco on

I would like to say no, but the truth is that I do. Depends on the procedure of course but I'm sure it comes out of jealousy. I'd love to get a tummy tuck and remove my double chin. There's no hope for the saggy boobs :-(

The reality is, if you've got the money and it makes you happy, who cares if you get a little "work" done. I would just caution that plastic surgery is not a cure all and not all plastic surgery is created equal. Some times it looks great but sometimes it doesn't. And there's no turning back.

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B.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Nope. Don't care.

I do judge people negatively that pierce lips, tongues, eye brows, put huge holes in their ear lobes, multiple holes all around their ears and places that are covered by one piece bathing suits and swimming trunks.

I think of tattos like I think of someone that would put a swastika on a synagog or throw paint on a cathedral.

I cannot tell you why I feel that way and don't feel the same way about a woman that wants to go from an AA to a D or from a DDD to a B. I would still advise them not to do it.

I admit to being wierd. I open doors for my wife and bring her flowers when its not a holiday or a special event (birthday, anniversary, etc). I write my wife love poems and cherish her and still do after knowing her for 39 years.

Good luck to you and yours.

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A.C.

answers from Atlanta on

Yeah, I think I do, unless the woman was deformed beforehand or something like that. Society puts too much emphasis on being perfect. Most women are beautiful just as they are, and women do age (it's a shock, I know) and our bodies change. Society needs to just get used to it, instead of encouraging us to 'fix' what ain't broke.

That said, I suppose statistically, I know someone who has had it done, and I don't know about it. And I don't want to know, probably. If I can't tell, I can't really judge them.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

I'd also be a liar if I didn't judge some people or say that I never take appearances into account when I meet someone.

My DH's ex got enhanced a couple of different times (once very obvious - you don't go from an A to a D without help) but she didn't pay child support and didn't contribute to her kids' orthodontia, medical care or school fees. If a mom's priorities aren't right then that's really what I'm judging, not the Botox. And she didn't help her case showing up to a 5th grade graduation falling out of her shirt. But that's poor taste, not just surgery. I didn't fault Kate Goslin (for example) for getting a tummy tuck, but it just snowballed after that and I think now she's more invested in her own self than her children. Which is a shame for the kids.

And I've been wrong, too. Woman in my church is from one of the South American countries and there were a few times I thought, "Leopard print to church? Really?" But I've seen her stand by her husband (an average joe balding white guy) after he had a stroke. My initial impression was wrong and judgmental.

My friends that are tattooed and pierced understand that it affects how the world perceives them. There are some really nice people who just like to have ink and put their kids well above their next tattoo. I would rather my daughter be their child's friend than deal with someone who is so into appearances my kid gets judged on the label on her clothes. KWIM?

And if the surgery was "good", then I don't really know, do I?

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A.G.

answers from Houston on

Just the ones who go to my Southern Baptist Church...

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A.L.

answers from Las Vegas on

I figure, to each his/her own.. I mean who cares what someone else has done.

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J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

If done tastefully no one notices so how would you judge?

At our parish we had the boob brigade, their mission was to determine who has had any plastic surgery and gossip about them constantly. I have little faith in their accuracy since I was on their list because I lost weight and my boobs didn't shrink. Idiots!!

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B.B.

answers from New York on

I guess if the person can afford it or it's part of their career it is not that big of a deal. But if the person has kids who could use the money and the person selfishly spends it on herself, then I would probably judge. I just saw a woman out yesterday and she looked like she put way to much time into her appearance and it really didn't look good anyway. I thought she looked cheesy. The only other thing I wierds me out a bit is when the wife gets a boob job and I see the husband getting excited.

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☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Meh...I think there is a lot to be said for women that truly age gracefully!

And I DO think women that go "over the top" DO appear ridiculous.

If a lip filler looks obvious, it's too much.
If boobs are GINORMOUS and pointing to the sky on a 40 year old--too much, kwim?

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I have so many more important things to think/worry about than if someone fixed their nose or got a boob job! I could care less either way!

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R.B.

answers from La Crosse on

one of my best friends has had a boob job... she didn't go bigger or anything... she just filled them back up after just being folds of stretched skin. She use to be a bigger woman and lost the weight and then she had 3 kids and her breast got huge while pregnant! Well from being stretched out so much after loosing all of her weight she had no breasts left... just saggy skin. Now they look very natural and nice.

The only thing I judge on, is Im jealous ;) Actually I wouldn't want a boob job but if I could afford it I would be in to remove that pouch of skin that just sits at the base of my stomach from being stretched out 5x!

When its a personal choice to fix something they don't like about themselves and are paying for it themselves.. then more power to them!

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T.A.

answers from Seattle on

Not unless it's super obvious or try do too much! More power to them if they want to look and feel better about themselves and have the money to do so, I would do a few things if I could!

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J.M.

answers from Dallas on

No plastic surgery is tasteful unless it is to fix a deformity from an accident or cancer. It is so sad that women don't know how to feel comfortable in their own skin!

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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

I don't, but recently a co-worker/friend had her entire body done. This is the 3rd time for the boobs, second time for the tummy and the first time for the butt and arms.

She came back to work and while she was still tender from the work and could barely move, got up from her seat, interrupted my conversation, and leaned over to look at my back end and tell me my a$$ was still big! I did tell her she had a lot of nerve to come back after all that work and talk about anyone's a$$.

She is no longer my friend and won't speak to me. To that I say HAHA, don't because I will tell her again if she made another comment like that.

Actually, she is still big, because she has the same habits and her butt seams a little lumpy. I wonder why she would do this to herself, but no judging.

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H.D.

answers from Dallas on

No, why should I judge someone else for trying to find happiness? Now I'm not saying I won't stare at a woman who has ridiculous triple M boobs but when you go that big to get noticed, well then yes, I'll notice but won't fault you for your decision. Whatever makes you happy in this area of life:)

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C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

How would I ever know if someone had anything done? Honestly, I don't know of anyone who has had anything done that I know of. If it was done well then I never will be able to tell. I think where we live people are more down to earth and not willing to spend money on things like this...but who knows.

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A.G.

answers from Dallas on

No. I don't judge others, unless it's an awful job or they just keep doing more and more.

R.A.

answers from Miami on

If there is anything I have learned in life it's not to jugde anyone - period. Who are we to judge? We don't have all of the facts, we haven't walked the walk and we wouldn't want to be judged. I say, if it makes you happy & feel good about you, go for it! If you can afford it and you are not hurting anyone else, why shouldn't you? Many of us spend our entire lives worrying about what other people think. I find that most people that criticize and judge are usually negative, pessamistic, cynical and unhappy themselves. Someone once told me that opinions are like ***holes, everyone has one! Forget about what others think. If you are not happy about what you see in the mirror and it is affecting the quality of your life, do whatever you need to do for YOU! Surround yourself with people who love and support you. Think positive thoughts. Take care and love yourself.

D.L.

answers from Dallas on

LOL I have my own answer to your question and when I saw how many responses you had already gotten thought to myself....I'm sure someone has already said what I'm thinking so I won't respond..... THEN I read the very last response from CarrieT and couldn't help myself!!!

It was SO funny how she says "How would I know if someone had anything done?" then she goes on to say "I think where we live people are more down to earth and not willing to spend money on things like this..." LOL LOL!!! She should have just said "YES" I judge based on need vs. $$.

OK, I had to get that out of my system. I didn't even read past that repsonse.

No. I personally don't judge anyone for that sort of decision. Who am I to know their money situation or their self esteem or simply their personal desires! (or even their hubbies) hehehe

I say go for it if you want it!! Honestly, people judge people all the time. And for everything from the type of gum you choose to the clothes you wear etc. It's how our society keeps checks and balances. It's the weight of each judgement that causes the problems. However, I don't think that the majority of people would judge that decision very heavily. They might roll their eyes and say "What was she thinking!" or they may say "Wow, she looks great!!". But at the end of the day, it's generally not a make or break thing for me. If you're my friend, neighbor, sister, child's teacher ....whatever.... it's your body and your choice and I would still accept you as you. Unless you're the cat woman and you've made yourself look like a freak....then I might choose to hang with someone else!! ;-)

K.G.

answers from Boca Raton on

Nope.. I have implants and have done my lips before..Whatever makes you feel better. More power to you~

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A.H.

answers from Dallas on

No I do not say I Judge. I have a friend that has some done. My only worry was that she was going pay check to pay check and not doing well. then she got some money from a car accadent and spent it all on plastic surgery. I just felt like she could have spent her money in a way that would help her long term. but not that she had it done. now she is still living paycheck to paycheck. just i wanted her to do something that would have helped her and her son more long term. lover her very much no matter what.

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A.F.

answers from Fargo on

No, I don't care what people do to their bodies. I like their insides more than their outsides! :)

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