63 answers

Do You Do It Yourself or Wait for Husband?

Ok so I have a friend who is always waiting for her husband to do everything. She complained for almost a year that the light over the washer was burned out and DJ is supposed to change it, her house was overly dusty and I suggested a new furnace filter and she says yeah DJ is going to check it and pick one up,she couldn't put the bigger carseat in the car herself cause DJ needed to do it,she waits for her husband to do everything and complains because he takes forever to do it. She is rather lazy though and is always trying to get people to do stuff at her house like grab her a drink or turn on her stereo things a host usually does. Anyway it got me thinking: Am I the only wife that just does what needs to be done if I can physically and know how to. I mean I but furnace filters and change them, I don't wait for my husband to put a carseat in the car,I can change any lightbulb, I can tighten a loose screw, put a new toilet seat on the toilet, paint a room...you get the idea. I can't hang pictures because our walls are plaster and if you don't do it right they crumble..(I have tried) I can't unclog a sink, or put oil in the car but I can fill the tires up..So do you ladies wait for your husbands to do everything or do you just do it if need it done or notice it needs done?

1 mom found this helpful

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So What Happened?™

Jo G. I will look into those 3M things. I have some things I want on the walls and I am currently waiting....
I believe it's Krista who can change oil I am sooo jealous I would love to know how to do that and change a tire...
Hazel , I know I am not the only one :)

Featured Answers

I just do what needs to be done.

I've lived on my own and I did EVERYTHING around the house, inside and out, for my car, etc.

I really can't tolerate a helpless woman.

Really, she just sounds lazy.

5 moms found this helpful

Me- I just do it.
I take care of it.
I can do anything inside and outside of the house.
I can even do construction.

5 moms found this helpful

Just tack a "while in bed" on the end for a whole different question! LOL

Most things I just do myself. The toolbox actually belongs to me (a gift from my dad who is quite handy. Honestly, I more inclined to call dad with a repair question then ask my husband). Some jobs take 2 people or are easier for him because he is a bit taller and stronger. But if I can just get something done I will. All the gardening and most things related to carseats and baby gear are my domain. My husband is better at computer stuff and some car stuff. A lot of things are just about who gets to it first.

4 moms found this helpful

More Answers

Am I the only one with my mind in the gutter when I read the title?

6 moms found this helpful

I do it all! My husband isn't lazy, just works a lot. I am a sahm so I feel it is my job to take care of as much as possible around the house. I won't weed eat and I won't clean out gutters, but I do pretty much anything else. When the mower was smoking recently, I figured out why and fixed it! Gotta love Google and Yahoo!

6 moms found this helpful

Not me.

(((laughing))) I am a stubborn ox.

Look, it's not that I'm helpless, and if it really needs to be done, I'll do it.

But, my (handsome, intelligent, well meaning, and) VERY easily distracted husband literally forgets to take off both socks at night. The man will walk around NAKED in ONE SOCK. The garbage doesn't always make it to the can, or the curb (Him (while on his way to take out garbage): "E., did you see that there is a slug a foot long over here? Hey, kids! Come look at this slug" Me: Wow. A slug. Kids, you have to put on your other sock before you go outside. And remember the garbage. The garbage has to go out to the curb." Him: "Yah, I kno...IS, is THAT...it IS my other work glove!!! THAT's where it is...ah shoot, the glue didn't dry right. I'm going to go seal this up..." and so on and so forth.)

Sometimes I just have to wait (ever so not patiently) for him to finish what he started.

Oh man, he makes me laugh. Really, (as he runs into the water at the beach) "Kids, look, you can pop the bladderwrack! E., JUST GRAB THE CRAB! NO, you're LETTING it GO! Scoot over, I'm going to get it", is so worth the delay in chores.

Most of the time, I can be okay with something being half way done, and, eventually, he follows through. (Also, I have officially mastered the art of nagging.)

If it not being done really drives me crazy, like that darned sock does, I'll take care of it myself. (Admittedly, I don't actually take care of the sock.) If, on the other hand, taking care of it is going to drive me crazy, I'll just wait until he follows through.

That, and I AM a bit lazy when it comes to chores.

6 moms found this helpful

I'm a single mother so I don't wait on anybody to do anything for me. If I need something done, I do it myself. I even know how to replace a thermocouple on a gas water heater.
Even when I was married, I did things myself if I wanted them done. It's not that my husband was useless by any means, but for heaven's sake, if the handle on the toilet broke, I didn't wait for him to get home from work to fix it when there was a hardware store 2 miles away.
We were invited for a bbq and potluck and I was so uncomfortable because the wife was completely pissed at her husband. Why? He didn't think to get a platter out of the top cupboard knowing she's too short to reach it. She didn't ask him to get it, she just thought he should have known to do it. I was thinking, "Jeez, woman....get a chair or something and just get the dang platter".
Why be mad over something like that? I even offered to get it for her but she was going to hold her ground that HE needed to do it and if she got mad enough maybe he'd figure it out. She was furious and everybody knew it. They didn't know why, not even her own husband, because she wasn't about to come out and tell him. That poor guy was just doomed.
I raised my daughter to be independent and not need a man for everything and I raised my son not to need a woman for everything.
He knows how to sew, cook, do laundry, iron.
A male co-worker was furious with me when he heard that I bought my son a sewing machine. I said, "What is he supposed to do? Have his mommy do everything for him for the rest of his life?" He said, "No. He's supposed to get married and make his wife do all of it".
I so don't think so!
No more than I thought my daughter should get married and make her husband do everything for her.
No way.

I think you summed your friend up yourself.....lazy.
I'm not very big, there are some things I can't physically do, but I'm pretty darn capable of doing most anything.
I don't understand women who can't, can't, can't.

Just my opinion.

6 moms found this helpful

Oh, save us all from the "damsel in distress" type! They make me crazy -- and give all us women a bad name.

I'm smart, capable and independent. I do what I can, try to figure out how to do stuff I don't know and give tasks my best shot. And my husband loves me and values my willingness to be a complete partner in our relationship. As much as I believe that no man ever got shot doing the dishes or vacuuming, I also believe that a woman who knows her way around home, yard and car maintenance has a little something sexy going on.

6 moms found this helpful

I just do what needs to be done.

I've lived on my own and I did EVERYTHING around the house, inside and out, for my car, etc.

I really can't tolerate a helpless woman.

Really, she just sounds lazy.

5 moms found this helpful

I do way more than my husband in handiman stuff. I grew up with a dad building and designing and learned a lot of things most women never do. My husband went to school to learn to, as he says, "work from the neck up" and is really intelligent and works with numbers and costs and money all day. But he cant do most handiman chores around the house without tearing things apart. He mows the lawn, but I used to. We remodled several times and Im the one who did most of the physical work unless I needed his muscles. I dont wait for him to get home most of the time. He has no clue how to put car seats in the car. I hate taking out the garbage but will if he is out of town, otherwise it waits till he gets home, just so he has something "manly" to do.lol. I do light bulbs most of the time but if he is home when one goes out I ask him to change it since he is taller and I cant reach them without a step stool. I have changed doorknobs when I put in new doors. I paint, tile, hang drapes, wallpaper, put in toilets, and know how to change faucets and light switches. I have my tool drawer in the kitchen and know how to use the tools way more than he does. Im not an outdoor person so I dont do much,if any, yard work. I did tell him we needed something to stake up a plant in the entryway one day. I was thinking a nice redwood stake would be good. His solution was to cut a 3 ft piece of white PVC pipe and tie it with a white and black striped shoe string. I about died,,but left it and years later its still there. He has worked out of town a lot over all the years and I am fine home alone taking care of everything. If I am not able to do a certain job, I hire it done. I wonder if he would survive as well if I was gone. By the way, my sister is even more capable and took care of everything at her house while her husband was out fighting fires for 40 years. Our daddy taught us well.

5 moms found this helpful

Me- I just do it.
I take care of it.
I can do anything inside and outside of the house.
I can even do construction.

5 moms found this helpful

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