Difficulty Raising My Two Year Old!

Is she seperated from you a lot i.e. daycare, babysitter?Babies may act out b/c they want their mothers attention or maybe theres other things wrong.Instead of getting frustrated (which usually makes the situation worse)have you tried to figure out what triggers the tantrums? tired, hungry, bored? Children don't know the words to express how their feeling and that's when you get the tantrums and outburts.I find that when I devote an hour a day to spend one on one playing or reading or some other activity with my 3yr old twins (no other distractions)that their more content and I'm able to leave the room and take care of other things w/o them freaking out.Kids don't like surprises so explain brief)things to them so they always know what's coming next.It's a big world that their trying to make sense of and they look to us to help them figure things out, and by talking to them helps them understand and eliminate some of that anxiety.Hang in there...it only get's better!

Don't worry, we all go through some anxiety with our children as they grow a little older. Just remember, children pick up on your emotions. Maybe when you get upset by her actions, she gets more upset, cause mommy is upset. Try thinking about all of the good times you have with her, and how your life would be if you did not have your precious angel. Good luck, K.

Hi O., I feel for you when I read your request! My daughter is going to be 3 in Sept. and we recently got out of a rough "terrible 2" phase with her. Not only did she gag herself when she didn't get her way but she would vomit all over herself, her bed, everything. I talked to her pedi and he said basically that it is not that uncommon and it usually wont last more than a month at most. Once she figures out that it's not getting her her way she'll stop it. I feel bad for you because you are by yourself. My husband is a wonderful father and spends a lot of time with our daughter which is a Godsend for me. Do you have anyone that can babysit for you for a couple hours so you could have some Mommy time? Sounds like you really need a break. I wish you all the best - hang in there!

This is late in response, but I've found that usually when a child is clingy like that they are looking for comfort & positive attention but will take what ever attention they can get from things like tantrums, acting out, etc. When my son - 2 yrs. - gets "momified," something else is usually going on. Mostly it's that he's tired. I just finished reading Happiest Toddler on the Block" by Harvey Karp, and I have to say that it has been a godsend in dealing with tantrums. It is a quick read and very enjoyable. It helps in understanding why toddlers act the way they do and lets you get back to enjoying your baby. I would highly recommend it. Also good was "How to talk so your kids will listen and Listen so your kids will talk", but it is better for preschoolers and up. Hope this helps.

Hi O., I just wanted to say that just maybe your 2 yr old is feeling 'insecure' for some reason. Were there recent changes at home? A new home? A new room? A parent / Dad away? Also, children very much take their lead from the caretaker/parent. If she senses your stress ("struggling to juggle everything in my life") & very much depending on you; sensing that/your stress could somehow have an affect on her. Almost sounds like shes following you around as if you're going somewhere without her?
"Abandonment" I've read about where a child feels insecure that even the least sepeartion from a parent (could simply be running out to the store or going to work & leaving the child w/a sitter) the child feels 'abandoned" & in turn will follow you around fearing this seperation again. Now it could also be for attention .. tho somehow it sounds a little more then just that. You should check w/her doctor or you can 'google' the question; they're lots of sights that offer physcologists advice that I've found helpful. Good luck & god bless.

I can feel your frustration. My daughter is also a singer...and LOUD. I am trying to get my DISCOVERY TOYS business (www.kooltoys1.com)brached out into daycares...and I have been making calls. She will come and talk to me or sing a LOUD song. I love her so much but I do need ALONE time too. I try to go into the other room and like your daughter she will follow me too. Sometimes I just have to laugh b/c she is so silly. You are NOT alone. It is hard too because my son was not like this...don't get me wrong he seems to be up my butt lately too. Just wanted you to know you are NOT alone. I know this is a phase and I keep TRYING to remember that. It WILL get better!