Dealing with My Picky 3 Year Old Daughter and Finding Creative Solutions!

Hi A.,
Im a very new mom myself but i just heard about this book: http://store.barefootbooks.com/kids-kitchen.html . It is designed to teach kids about healthy eating and cooking and part of the theory here is that kids are more likely to eat food that they feel they had a hand in making. Now, the book says for ages 8+ and at 3 its not like she can do things in the kitchen on her own but you might be able to adapt it or at least test the theory by having some quality time in the kitchen as a way of bonding and hopefully encouraging new foods!!

Good luck!
S.

Ideas:
Call things snacks, even if they aren't. Some healthy foods cut up small can be snacks (pizza, whole wht bagels, cheese sticks).
Give her dessert if she eats a meal. My daughter always asks for dessert (wich is frit or yogurt or sonetimes a tofutti ice cream or ice pop) after a meal. So she has incentive.
Bribe her- u can eat while watching a movie.
Or finally, thew thing that helped my 3 yo girl try new foods was watching her older cousins eat it. Tell her that her friend (or a fave character from movie) likes beans and she may try it too.
remember 3 is the age where they say no just to exert control even if they want to say yes, just to get a reaction! Act like its no big deal if she refuses a food. Just say, ok, try it in a few minutes...or no dessert!

Children slow down their growing around 3 and dont need as much food. Make sure her snacks as well as her meals are healthy, cut back on starches,(pasta, potatoes & bread) since these are very filling. A half a sandwich will fill a 3 y/o up, but mostly from the bread. Give her finger foods, that she can grab and go with. Cheese sticks, apples, carrots, grapes etc.
She doesnt need treats, such a candy and cookies. Tell her the treat is an apple or celery with peanut butter in it.

Great time to thinking about this issue, and not when she's a teenager and has a mind of her own! (Just a thought: she won't be snacking on nutrient-low foods if you don't keep them in the house...)

As you are concerned about her nutrition, I suggest that you look at the protein shakes and bars that Isagenix offers. They are low-cost, really tasty, but most importantly, will give your child most of the basic nutrition she needs. They are not a substitute, but rather an insurance policy, so to speak. More info at Proudtothrive.com

This may have already been suggested so please excuse any repetitive answers but after reading your questions it seems like you may want to do something inbetween what you are already doing.

Giving chioces to a 3 year old is a good thing, however, askign them what they want to eat leaves them with too many choices and they'll never decide. For instance: for dinner instead of putting the complete decsion in her hand give her an option: do you want chicken cutlets or hamburger, do you want rice or mash potatoes, do you want broccoli or spinach. Give 2 choices per food group for a meal and let her pick one. Pretend you are "building" a meal. The same concept goes for a snack; giver her a limited choice.

Having her participate on some level will make her feel like she has some control over what she eats but limiting her choices to the ones you give her puts you on the driving seat of what goes in her mouth.

Oh and homemade yogurt smoothies are awesome for picky eaters. You can pack a bunch of nutrition into one of those.

You can give her snacks that are fun and healthful. She is only 3 - truthfully they know how to eat better =- with small meals/snacks through out the day. conventional school / work lives have us eat the 3 meals.

Give her healthful snacks and don't expect her to eat a big meal -smaller portions for meals.

I have some great snack ideas in my blog www.nosickvisits.com.

L.

Hi A.,

I would also look at the causes of her picky eating. Sometimes this is just a power struggle and a way of getting lots of attention from you, even if it is negative attention. But some children are just picky eaters.
I would follow the recommendation of the other mom, try drinks. Either fruit juices (if she likes these, consider buying a juicer and do them fresh and cheaper at home) or joghurt drinks. You can also consider ensure or pediasure, if she drinks a bottle of that you can relax much more on what she eats during the rest of the day. Giving her lots of choices is not a good idea, what you can do is talking to her what she wants to eat BEFORE the meal and suggest two choices and then have her stick to the one choice that she chooses. And cut down on the snacking and if she wants to snack, offer healthy snacks like carrots or apples. She will either not eat them and be hungry for the main meal then or eat them and you have accomplished something too. If she wants something like icecream, choclate or similar, tell her she can have that as a dessert after she has finished her main meal.
With this approach you still give her plenty of choices but make her stick to a decision. Consider giving her some probiotics to see if that helps her digestion and leads to better absorption.

Hi A., Pickiness is a stage and a form of control. Offer her only what you want her to eat. When she is hungry, she will eat. I also worried about my petite little girl who is now a full grown 40 year old. Grandma Mary

I always told my kids "you can have one treat a day" and they learned to monitor that themselves.

There was a point where my son was only eating raspberries and cashews! Expensive, but healthy --- and evidently a common choice at that age.

Hi A.,

I would worry about her weight if she was of normal, fullterm weight at birth. I agree with another poster about trying the Pediasure to make sure that she is getting enough calories.
If her snacks are the same things that you'd encourage her to eat at meals - veggies, fruit, cheese, yogurt, I wouldn't worry about her grazing. If the snacks are goodies/junk food, I wouldn't slowly phase them out, I'd get rid off all of them now, today.
As for choices, I would not give a 3 year old open ended choices, "What do you want for lunch?" but choices with limited options, "For lunch, you can have grilled cheese or mac and cheese, which would you prefer? You can have either carrot sticks or applesauce with that, which would you like?" If you've made something that she chose, I would not allow her to change her mind. Mom is not a short order cook who has to jump through a 3 year old hoops to get a meal on the table.
It's okay if she likes things plain. My daughter is now 14 but when she was little, she liked plain too! She didn't like to eat anything that had a sauce, and sometimes at family gatherings, that made things difficult when things had sauces, marinades, etc but if you are cooking at home, put a little of whatever you are making off ot the side for her to eat without the sauces, spices or whatever she doesn't care for.
Good luck! BTW, I used to be a postpartum doula too, I hope that you enjoy your work!