Daycare or Nanny - HELP!!!

Hi. My name is S.. I am a SAHM looking to watch child/children in my home. Maybe I can help. I have lots of experience with babies! email me if you are interested

Dear Ann,
It has been my experience in the past that any time a child or adult that has been safe at home for along amount of time and then is put out into a place where there are alot of people they get very sick at first but then build up a resistence to all the germs and sicknesses(?) out there so if you can just stick it out you will see that your child will soon not bee sick. I know it is tough but just hang on and it WILL pass!! S.

I have to disagree with the other mothers, long term him being sick is going to cost you more time and money to keep having him seen and to keep getting the medicine.Not to mention he's going to suffer more. I stay at home with my 2..my 4 yr old is in school which brings home enough germs. And while the statement is true that germs are all over my kids have never caught anything from the mall or any store, just direct contact with other sick kids and family members. I personally think having a nanny or a babysitter isnt a bad idea, it will certainly save him from catching alot of illnesses and be sure to have a back up in case the nanny becomes ill. As far as the child interaction...them having little contact with other small misbehaving children can be a good thing. I had less problems out of my 2 b/c they didn't have any bad influences and now that 1 is in school and they have each other it doesnt bother them at all. Never bothered my first, in fact when he got to play with cousins I had to re adjust his mood everytime b/c he took on their personality for a little while. The decision is yours of course but I don't think getting a nanny or babysitter is such a bad idea, and they do get sick less.

Hi Ann,

I have a little different take on this than most of these moms. I am a WAHM and I have been a Nanny! Daycare is not for socialization. Daycare is for someone to care for your child when you are unable to. Where in our history are we to learn from our peers? Especially if our peers are 2 and 3 years old. I want my children to have my values, not a $5.00 an hour employee. I completely understand if you have no other options but it sounds like to me, you do!

I said this to say, I have been a Nanny. Nanny's are at the mercy of their employer. If you hire a Nanny, you have complete control over how your child is raised. If you're fearful your child will have no social skills, don't be. Social skills are rarely learned from peers, unless of course they are bad ones. If you have friends with your values, socialize with them. And let your little one be a part of that.

Daycares fester germs and your child's immune system will not "improve" by exposing him to other sick kids. This will never change. The chemicals that the health department requires for cleanliness will break down your little one's immune system. My sister is a retired social worker and her primary job for the bulk of her years was child development and licensing of daycares. The cleanest daycares had more deaths than the dirty ones. Chemicals are a scary thing to deal with.

This of course is your decision because God gave you this little one! If you would like more information on chemicals in the daycares or in the homes,let me know. I love to share the research I have done with other moms.

Regards,

M.

Hi Ann! Just wanted to let you know that you are not alone by any means. We actually had trouble finding a nanny who was dependable and decided to go with a local daycare three days a week. Our baby girl got sick time and time again so we switched schools.
It went better but after three weeks she is now sick again w/ a cold.

I think re nannies, you have to interview a ton and be ready to pay 15.00 an hour for someone decent.

your mom's right , and keeping them out of day care wont keep them from being exposed to being sick anyway unless you keep him in a little plastic bubble anyway. He will get exposed to illnesses at the store , the mall walking down the street , in elevators, from you being around people that get sick at work. I'd say the risk isn't that much less keeping him at home.

Hey Ann- I also have an 8 1/2 month old. I am currently looking for a job but thought of putting Gracie into daycare really bothers me, primarily for all the reasons you just listed. In my opinion, the nanny is the way to go. That way the child is not as exposed to all those other sick kids at the day care and if you child is sick, you can still go to work and the nanny should be fine with taking care of the kid even when he/she is sick. I have even thought about taking care of some other kids at my house so I can still stay home with Gracie. Just my thoughts though. Hoped it helped a little bit.

I would seriously look into a nanny or possibly in home daycare. Also, maybe you could start trading child care with another mom who works part time or look for a stay at home mom who would like to earn a little extra money. I am a stay at home mom and I babysit a 10 month old in my home. His mom chose me for this very reason. He was in daycare for a week and got bronchitis. Also grandparents are another option and most would love the opportunity to babysit a few days a week. You are probably missing a lot of work b/c of his illnesses and it is so h*** o* a child to be constantly sick. You should ask yourself if you really need to have part time job. Is it financially necessary or do you just enjoy it? Is it worth your child getting sick at day care? Just a few questions I asked myself and decided to cut corners and stay home. If daycare is absolutely necessary be sure they are sanitizing the toys and making sick kids stay at home.

My daughter is in daycare and is sick all the time. I was told by my pediatrician that a child in daycare is exposed to something like 6 new viruses a week (or maybe a day I do not remember but either way that is a lot) Although you may be able to prevent some illnesses now by keeping your child at home, I was told that children that stay at home are more likely to be sick all the time when they start school because they will be exposed to all the new viruses for the first time. As much as it breaks my heart to see my daughter sick, I try to tell myself that as long as my daughter is not on antibiotics all the time and is able to fight the illnesses, these illnesses are helping her build up her immune system.

if you like the day care he's in now don't switch to another day care. all kids in day care share their germs. it gets better as they get older and learn to wipes their own noses :) having a nanny would remove him from the other sick kids but it will also take away the interaction he has with the other kids - so you may want to look for a play group if you go that route. it's your decision on what's best for your family. i have a co-worker who used a nanny with both her kids until they were 2 then she moved them into day care. my child has been in day care since she was 7 weeks old. she was sick a bit until she was 2 then she only goes for her annual check up. we are lucky! best of luck to you.

Hey Ann,

I just want to tell to hang in there. Winter is the worst time of year for colds and stuff. I have a 4yr old little girl. She was in and out of daycare as well. It's h*** o* them if they only go a few days out of the week. He really needs to all week or not at all. He is getting everything from school. I finally put my little girl in all week and she was still sick for a about 2months, but after that she was fine. She did not get sick anymore, even when other kids in her class was sick. So, put him full time. And hang in there. It gets better.

Your friend,
A.

I have my 2 1/2 year old in a day care and will be putting my 6 month old in tomorrow. I know it is bad now, but hang in there. Your poor little guy sounds miserable. I have been there and I know you probably are really tired, but he will get better and everything will work out. Daycare is great for socialization, learning, self-esteem, and building up a good immune system.

This may be something to bring up with the director of the daycare your child is in. I actually work at the place my daughter goes and after she came home with cold after cold for 2 months I volunteered to help clean the room she stays in. Alot of the time we (as humans) don't realize where we leave our germs. I found that her teachers were cleaning her toys, but didnt realize that the walls, and shelves needed TLC too. And all of the cabinets and doors. Kids are messy- Maybe providing some Germ X could help her caregivers get the message across. Daycare is good for kids, and so are germs, but the best thing to do is to make sure that whoever is taking care of your child is taking the right measures. good luck.

OK Ann, I don't mean to sound like i know it all or anything but Daycare is just that and you will not only see him sick all the time from the cleaning chemicals they use and bleaches and lysol that cause the exact problems he has. These problems are not necesarrily caused by germs. My 3 1/2 year old had the same things wrong in his first year of life. But you will see behavioral issues as they get older because the daycar cannot discipline them. My now 3 1/2 year old is going to a private preschool 2 days a week now to get him the dicipline and confidence he needs after being bullied at daycare. I would suggest you weigh how much you make to how much you are paying for that daycar or nanny and see if you are even making any money at all. I could not work part time and make enough to pay more than the daycare cost. So I work at home now. I also suggest getting a book called 'The Safe Shoppers Bible. It tells all about the chemicals used in all the disinfectants daycares and yourself use to clean daily tha tcause things like cancer, bronchialitis and ear infections. I have educated myself and will not ever use Lysol or Bleach in my home ever again. Hope this helps.
K. S

my sister in law is homeschooled and will be turning 18 in a few weeks. She lives with us and our 5 kids and is very used to and great with babies and children.
we live on the southside.
She is currently looking for work since she is graduating. If you are interested in possibly hiring her e-mail me at ____@____.com =-)