Daughter Showing Hoarding Tendancies

Hi, my daughter is also 4 and she has been doing the same thing since she was able to play!! Totally normal, she is collector not a hoarder!! They love things that other people don't want. When I get the mail I give the junk mail to her and she is there waiting for it. Just teach her that at some point we need to make room for more things. Get her bins, help her with storage issues, and get a trash can just for her. I was concerned too, but over thime I realized that she is just a kids who likes to collect!! Do't make her feel weird be on her side and I promise it will get better. Bandaids no big deal my daughter used to collect dirty tissues!!! I taught her that they have germs and she could get sick and now she collects only healthy things, but it did take time....Relax!!!! Good Luck!!!

I would give her a special recycling container for the paper products that are taken in those green and yellow dumpsters near schools and churches, do you know what I mean? And paperboard, like her toothpaste box, can be recycled at most major recycling locations. If she understands that these things are needed for making new paper, she might accept the plan and move on from her keeping of everything. Along with the process, if you have a digital camera, you could allow her to take a picture of each thing she'd rather keep than get rid of (especially the bandaids!) and then pitch them. There's a record of what they look like, and now goodbye. I think this would be worth a shot.

Good luck!

absolutely normal for the younger age group!

this behavior can begin much earlier....it's especially disconcerning when it's a toddler! In my daycare, I have two girls- age 3. They both, not only want to "save" whatever I'm trying to throw away, ....but they will actually hand it back to me & say, "here, hold this while I play" !!!

We live in a society of consumerism. We buy & keep our stuff, & kids want to too. How often have you seen children with wallets full of those fake credit cards? !! Children mimic what they see....& if you think about it, we ALL have lots of stuff.

Don't try to put a label on her behavior. Let her be a kid, try to show her a more productive mindframe when it comes to personal belongings & the "need" to own/save things. Model the behavior you desire her to exhibit, & she'll bounce right out of it.

AND, one more thing to think about: this attitude toward belongings manifests in children....in ways that just makes NO sense to adults!.....think about how often children, when potty-training, cry & throw fits when we flush away! Kids want to hold onto all kinds of gross things....it's all part of their innate possessiveness! Peace.....

If your daughter is truly hoarding, this is a form of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, and you two will both need professional help to conquer it. Luckily, you're catching it early, and you should be able to get your daughter back on track. Talk to your doctor and your daughter's pediatrician about recommendations for a therapist with experience working with anxiety- and OCD-related disorders. This therapist should be able to tell you if your daughter is showing early signs, or just going through a phase, and if she is showing early signs, should be able to help you nip it in the bud now, since OCD is a disorder that gets worse with time. One way you can tell on your own is that true hoarders experience anxiety when one of their junky "treasures" is thrown away. If your daughter doesn't really notice, she may be going through a phase, but if she has a meltdown or ends up looking for it later, you should probably seek help. Good luck.

I honestly believe they all have different levels if this phase it is about control. My oldest when thru a period where he was unwilling to give anything up and his sister (16 months younger) wanted to give everything away, after about a year he stopped that tendency and his sister began it. she too has since outgrown it. I can say that when they got older 8 and 9 I have allowed them to watch a few of the horder shows and that has made a huge difference in how they think about 'stuff" and how they want their personal spaces to be and feel.

Sounds normal to me, all of mine have gone through something like that. My oldest boys it was rocks and beer caps, and sometimes odd pieces of what I would consider trash.

My 8 year old will keep everything he thinks has a "memory", meaning he has some kinda tie to. My 6 year old collects very odd random things and my three year old is just starting to collect stuff.

I believe it was around ten that a lot of their collecting stopped. I would watch and make sure. If she goes ballistic when something is accidentally thrown away I might become cautious but that would be about it.

Every time she wants to keep something, tell her she needs to say goodbye to something else. That's it. It will decrease the mess. My kids were the same way, but when they were distracted by dad, I'd go into the mess and toss all the garbage. Once they saw their toys again, they didn't want all the empty junk.

Might just be a phase . . . you may want to also research/consider OCD and PANDAS (relates to strep).

Again, it could be a phase.

Hi. You are a great momma for inquiring. I agree with Stacey M. (the first response) I would also add, that her interest in common household items vs. electronic toys, tv etc. is great. That means she is using her imagination and creativity. I keep a huge box of old cereal boxes, water bottles, tupperware, bookmarks, kleenex boxes etc. just for my LO to play with, color on, pretend things, build etc.

This sounds just like my son. I don't think it's hoarding though. I just dread summer coming b/c I pitch all that stuff while he's at school! LOL