Daughter Seems Behind Others in Her Class

All children develop at their own rates. You don't have anything to worry about, especially if the teacher is saying that she'll catch up and be fine in time. By all means, keep working with her on her letters, and writing, but as far as the coloring... more important than staying in the lines, is freely expressing herself through her scribbles, or murals, or whatever it is she decides to do. I've seen quite a few paintings in museums that were little more than scribbling, all done by adults!

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M.,
The teacher is right, you shouldn't worry about it, she will catch up on her own time. Maybe she feels your frustration and she is becoming that way to. You should feel good, I have 3 kids, although there now older, but they didn't learn there name and the stuff that Eva is having problems with until they were like 4 or a little older, now my 14 year old daughter is in the 9th grade and want's to be a lawyer. I learned a long time ago that kids will learn things when they want to or when there ready. There are probably things that Eva is really good at that the other kids in her class don't even have a clue about. Good Luck.
T. S.

1 mom found this helpful

Hi M.,
I wouldn't worry to much. You have a young three year old. Many of the other kids are probably much older. My son turned three in Ausgust 29 the deadline for preschool in the school I would send him was Sep. 1. I decided to wait another year. I wanted him to be old for his grade instead of young and trying to catch up.
Chris

When I was in preschool all the way to 10th grade I fought to pass! But it turned out I have a learning disability and just needed to be tought diffrently, and needed more one on one time with the teacher. And after I found out I have a learning disability I was put in special Ed classes. and I started getting a's and b's! So maybe that could be the problem.

You child has just turned 3. You can work with her but all children learn at a different pace. I have 4 1/2 yr old triplets. Isabella is the social butterfly, doesnt really know her letters, just started coloring in the lines and drawing faces. She cant really spell her name except the I and cant tell me her address or phone number (which I try to work on with them. Brody is my lovie boy, he knows some of his letters, not to many, he knows a few numbers, has problems holding a crayon or pencil still (he is also left handed), draws faces and does not stay in the lines. He knows how to spell his name but cannot write it. He knows the city he lives in sometimes and not much else. Logan is my smart boy, smartest in the class acording to the teachers. He knows all his letters, can count to 87 without even thinking about it, can recgonize (no I cant spell) numbers at least up to 31 (calendar), can somewhat tell time (which I have NEVER worked on with him). He draws full people and doesnt really stay in the lines. He can spell and write his name, Brody's name and is working on Isabella's. He knows his phone number, last name, city and street that he lives on. Oh yeah and btw he decided he wasnt potty trained anymore after being trained for 2 -3 months, so we are going thru that again.

So like I said, each child learns at their own pace. You cannot really measure your child by the others in her class. Just work with her, she will get it in her own time. :)

M.

M.,

Please don't worry about your daughter. She's 3! And newly 3 at that! It's okay to work with her on coloring and writing her name, but the worst thing you can do is pressure her. I have a daughter who's 6 and was always ahead and still is of everyone in her class. I don't believe she's gifted....she's just an A personality. My son, on the other hand, would be happy if other people did everything for him....including coloring, writing his name, cutting, feeding him. He's 4.5 and does seem a little behind others in his class, but the teachers aren't worried. My advice would be to love your daughter, spend as much time with her as you can and do a variety of activities. Look for letters and numbers everywhere you go, point them out to her. Play 'I Spy' in the car, even if she doesn't play along. Teach her songs with movements like 'I'm a Little Teapot'. All of these things will stimulate her mind in other ways. She is not behind the other kids she's just a little different.

I don't know how old the other kids in the class are, but if they are closer to 4, then that would explain the big difference. My son did not write his name until about 4. He does not go to preschool. Personally, I never promoted coloring pictures and staying inside the lines until my son was about 4 either. I think that just drawing and scribbling enhances imagination more. If the teacher doesn't think that it is a problem, then I wouldn't worry about it. These things are not a measure of IQ. Maybe give her time everyday to draw and practice writing. My kids (4 1/2 and 2 1/2) have coloring stuff in the dining room and they color when waiting for meals or after meals when I'm cleaning up. It keeps them busy and they are learning. I think they most important thing at this age is just really getting used to holding a crayon/pencil and letting her do what she wants with it. During that drawing time, work with her with her letters, but if she seems uninterested, don't push it. Write her name on her paper or on a chart so she can see it when she is having drawing time. And as far as teaching her things and keeping it fun, my kids love flashcards. They really think it's a game. It's helping my 2 1/2 learn her abc's and my 4 1/2 learn all his letter sounds. Sometimes they are expensive and I just make my own from index cards. We do numbers and greater than/less than signs too. Good Luck and don't stress, kids need time to just be kids. I think sometimes parents push there kids alittle to hard for their own satisfaction. Kids don't need to have stress about learning!!!!

It's just a guess, but if the preschool is like my son's preschool, the kids might be four already. My son has three year olds on class with them, too. I wouldn't worry about her, too much. Just continue to work with her in a fun upbeat way. She'll come around before kindergarten.

I AGREE WITH YOUR DAUGHTER TEACHER IF SHE ID ON THE YOUGER SIDE GIVE IT SOME TIME WHEN IT COMES TO LEFT HANED CHILDREN THEY SEAM TO LEARN ON THEE OWN MY YOUNGEST WRIGHT NOW IS A LEFT HANDED SO I BOUGHT HER A LEFT HANED NOTE BOOK .TRY GINEONG HER PICTURE TO COLOR BUT BEFOR YOU DO OUT LINE THEM WITH A BLCK MARKER SO IT BOLDER IT IR HRLPING WITH MY LEFTY GOOD LUCK AND DON'T WORRY

How old are the children in her class? If the preschool is 3-4 there is a huge difference in the children. My son will be 3 in March and cannot write his name and does not color in the lines and he is considered at the top of his preschool class. Kids all develop differently (and who says coloring in the lines is evidence of anything other than conformity!). If she is behaiving appropriately, speaking appropriately, etc, I wouldn't worry. Plus, she just started school-- you'll be amazed how fast she starts picking up new things.

There is absolutly NOTHING wrong with your daughter.....She just turned three so let her little mind catch up with being 3 plus she is left handed so she sees you doing things backwards than she is....My son is also left handed so I took him to my dad who is also left handed so he could learn to write and tie his shoes. He is now 21 and I wonder how he does is because when I see him write I laugh cause he looks backwards to me. So if you are really concerned try to find someone else who is left handed and have them show her. Everything will work out just fine! Let her be little and cherish it while you can because before yo know it, she will be 21 and your going to wonder what happend to those preciouse years...I cried on his 21st birthday.

This is one of my favorite subjects to comment on first remember all kids are different and second kids dont automaticly learn things. It is advise I give to everyone if your child will let you work with her at home on little things never force her but do fun things.

Like I teach mine left from right by pushing the grocery cart in the store and letting them tell me what direction to go. Or when they are little picking something up and saying red ball and everytime they pick it up say red ball. I started with all my kids as young as 1 like im teaching my 18 month old right now body parts pointing to my nose and saying nose now she points to her nose when i say nose.

My 4 year old is in preschool right now to and he can just barely write his name but he knows his phone number and how to spell his name. That starts as a game I say I know how to spell your name and i spell it then i say can you do it? Over a couple days I say I cant remember how to spell your name can you tell me and after a couple days he could. Same with the phone number my oldest three knew their phone number by 4 and to spell thier name but there was other stuff they couldnt do.

Now my 7 year old is in 2nd grade and in a 3rd grade level but my 12 year old struggles a little bit but is an excellent speller not an A student by far but shes juggling cheerleading to. She is young and bieng one of the youngest in the class would make you feel as though shes behind but she may not be at all. She may just be learning at her own rate and all kids do some kids pick things up quick like my 7 year old and others just dont like my 12 year old.

The important thing to remember is you are doing things the right way by helping her at home that is the best thing you can do. And overlook the things she isnt doing in school and improve the things she is doing and everything will come with time. Repeating things seems to work for mine but not work for all some kids just wont sit still like my son I have to make things a game so he will listen.

I guess I get it from my dad I was reading by the time I was 4 only because my dad taught me on a vacation reading road signs dont ask me how but they did. But I never got good grades at all and graduated with a C average all I could do was read well. My 7 year old will read everthing she gets her hands on chapter books and all but my oldest hates to read which is part of her school problem. I wouldnt worry to much unless she isnt progressing at all then worry but if she is learning stuff ok then shes a normal kid.

Why compare to other children? Everyone grows at their own rate. I noticed my 3 year old (turned 3 in September)was also not writing his name or coloring within the lines in preschool, but I don't worry because he excels in other areas, like language and motor skills, and socialization. Plus, the other kids that are "ahead" are also 4 years old! My son has come a long way since he started preschool in September, and I am very proud of him, even if he is still working on his name and coloring within the lines. Please don't compare - praise the positive, work on things he/she needs improvement through encouragement, but not through pressure on him/her or yourself.

First of all, remember that all children are different and learn at a different pace, even if they are the same age. And being left handed doesn't having anything to do with the child's learning abilities. If you are truely concerned talk with the child's teacher and doctor. See what they suggest. Then go from there. Just remember to enjoy the time that you have. But most importantly don't compared the child to others!! It will just make you crazy. Good luck