My soon to be 2 yo daughter has been telling me in the last couple weeks that she wakes up and someone is in her room. We've also noticed a pattern of her coming in our room most nights over those couple of weeks, usually around 3 in the morning. Of course, I always tell her there's no one in her room. The only people in the house are mommy, daddy, her and her brother, and our dutiful watchdog. I even told her that the dog would never let a stranger into the house without barking and waking us all up. But yet- she still persists there's someone in her room at night. I even heard her saying "Go away, lady!" one night right before I was heading to bed. Of course, I popped my head in right away (no one was there), and she was visibly upset at that time and crying.
I don't know what to think about this. We are leaving an almost too bright nightlight in her room. So she's not in the dark. We've given her a guard "duck". Some "scare away" potion. Nothing is working. I know this will work itself out, but is there anything else I can try? I don't want her to be afraid, and I would all like for us to get a good night's sleep!
Can the dog sleep in her room for a few nights? I know when my hubby is not home at night, I simply take my cues from the dog. If I think I hear something, I look at him. If there's no reaction, I know it's nothing. I have more trust in a dog's instinct than MANY other things.
It's her imagination. She sees color gradations in the shadows and thinks they're people. Let her sleep with the lights on until she outgrows it. .
Every night, I have to go in my 3yo's room and tell the bears to go home. Lol. She isn't scared of them, but they aren't allowed in her room when she is trying to sleep. Apparently, the baby bear is quite noisy. ;) sometimes, it really DOES help to do the checks/send aways... Their imaginations are vivid enough, that it doesn't matter what you tell them... They still think they see these things, and they still feel scared. Heck, I know there are times *I* get scared in the dark, even though I KNOW there is nothing in my room to get me. And I'm an adult. Lol.
My way of handling that is to make whatever she is scared of into something nice. When my DD's bear thing started, she was scared of her play house in her room. So when I asked her to tell me what was scaring her, and she pointed at the house, I poked my head in. Originally, I did try to tell her that nothing was in there and had her check it herself. She was still scared, so after a few weeks of trying to convince her nothing was there I decided to try another tactic and make it fun. I asked her what was in the house, and started naming off animals. When I got to bear, she decided that's what it was. So I poked my head into the house, and said, "you silly bears! It's bedtime, you need to go home!" And that was that. Now, any scary shadows or noises in her room get blamed on the bears.
I think it really helped to give her a positive thing to blame for things that were scaring her. Instead of hearing a creak and thinking a monster is skulking around her room, her mind jumps to those silly bears.
At her age, I think it's more of an imagination/ phase than a paranormal experience.
I would suggest giving her a small flashlight to shine at the 'lady' when she thinks she sees it, or move her night light to a different spot in her room if she has one. I had to move my DD's from across the room to the socket next to her bed because the shadows were scaring her. I figure that it changed the shadows drastically enough that they didn't freak her out any more.
Personally I would smudge your house with sage.
I would also avoid telling her that no one is there/she does not see anything. Whatever she is seeing is very real to her.
Let her know that she can get up and turn on the light to check, then shut it off and go back to bed.
Scare away potions imply that there's actually something there to scare away. Checking to reassure oneself shows that there's nothing there to be afraid of.
Don't feed into the belief that monsters and such even exist. They don't. There's nothing there. Turn on the light and look. Nope. Goodnight!
You're giving her mixed messages: scare-away and bodyguards / telling her there's nothing there. She "detects" somebody there, so she won't believe the second story, even without the internal contradictions.
The most successful techniques that worked for my daughter and grandson were to empower them and assure them that "Yes, the FEAR is real, and lots of kids and even some grownups go through a time when they are afraid at night. It's okay, it's normal, and you will get over it some day, probably soon." (In age-appropriate language, of course.)
Aim for a tone that's light and practical (not too heavy with concern, which could translate as anxiety), and respect but not pity. Don't deny what she sees/hears, but don't reinforce it. Shadows are cast by nightlights, and shadows start moving around if you stare at them, even if not already scared. So put in more than one nightlight if that can work, but keep very dim, pink bulbs that are less likely to interfere with her natural melatonin production.
I'd also want to include her in brainstorming a list of ideas that might help. She might have a good, creative approach hiding just out of sight. You can provide suggestions like a small flashlight to illuminate shadows, or a radio tuned to soft music to help her relax, or making friends with the lady, who maybe just wants to watch over her….
Good luck. This stage usually does pass fairly quickly (but might seem like forever) for most children.
I am a psychic/medium and work with a Paranormal Research Group. I recommend you look up online to see ifr there is a group in your area.
If you would like to Pm me please feel free.
It's common and will be for a few more years.
Their imaginations are going full tilt and this doesn't stop when they go to sleep.
Have a sleeping bag next to your bed.
When she wakes up and wants you, have her settle down next to your bed.
My son went through something like this at 3. I would take a piece of an old broomstick and "beat" the clothes in the closet and chase the ghosts away. He would see me beat the clothes and feel safe. After about a month he was fine with them not being there.
You just have to find a way to reassure her that no harm will come to her. Take it seriously but on a light note so that she does not build up an anxiety issue.
Good luck to you.
the other S.
PS My son will be 40 this September and has not recall to this time in his childhood.
Because children are not programmed yet like we are (by that, I mean what we're supposed to believe and not believe), they are able to see through the mist that divides us from the other side. It is very, very possible that your daughter sees spirits. My daughter does not see spirit; she hears them. I hear spirit. The phenomenon of hearing or seeing spirit is becoming much more prevalent these days.
I have a friend whose 7-year-old son is very perceptive, can see spirits, and draws spirits to him like a moth to a flame. She has been working with him lately to get him used to the idea that--that is who and what he is. He sees spirit. Spirit wants to contact him. She's helping him learn how to control that contact (because we are able to say when we want them to contact us. It is like a light switch; we can turn it on and off).
Contact the National Spiritualist Association of Churches; they can get you in to contact with someone who can visit your daughter and your home to ascertain what is going on. Is your house built on a burial site? Were there ever any deaths or murders in the house? They can help answer those questions.
National Spiritualist Association of Churches
13 Cottage Row, PO Box 217, Lily Dale, NY 14752
P ###-###-####
F ###-###-####
We do a monster check with a light every night.
Both of my kids went through this stage.
Hmmm, I'm sure Theresa Caputo (the Long Island Medium) would tell you that your daughter has a gift.
I wonder if she's asleep and dreaming when this happens, or had a bad dream about a lady being in her room, and is dwelling on that every night. Does she settle back to sleep in her own bed when this happens, or does she want to sleep in your room?
My youngest did this at around her age, but it was only for two nights. He kept saying "a nurse came in my window". We couldn't make heads nor tails of it and figured it was a dream.
Hopefully this will pass soon and you can get back to sleeping through the night!
One of my kids did this as a toddler. It was a stuffed animal who's eyes caught the light of the nightlight. Any chance there are stuffed animals in the room that might look different at night and scare her?
If possible, try sleeping in her room with her one night (at least part of the night). I think that can be more effective than bringing her to your room - might as well try to find out what's going on in her room.
If it's not a ghost, and it's not just her imagination, then hopefully you can "fix" it easily. I agree with the earlier posts that some problems are caused by light reflecting off of a stuffed animal's eyes, colors in shadows, etc. If it's around the same time every night, maybe you have a neighbor who is pulling into their driveway at that time and their headlights shine into her room?
My other thought is that you should ask her to describe what she sees in detail, and try to figure out if the image relates to anything she might have seen in "real life" during the day. Could be an image that she saw - however briefly - and has stuck in her mind (witch from Snow White, strange old lady at grocery store last week...for some reason the image stayed in her mind, etc).
My little cousin was about that age when she would look at her doorway && say "scary man" && point. It was really freaky.
She is 9 now && did eventually grow out of it. My aunt tried to help by staying in her room with her a couple of nights && when she stopped waking up she would just sneak out after she fell asleep while reading to her or something. It seemed to help a little. Sorry if I wasn't much help.
Good luck!
At that age children haven't sorted out reality and imagination yet, so what she thinks she's seeing is real to her. I haven't read all the previous answers, but have you tried giving your girl a flashlight? Even if she loses a little sleep for a few nights playing with the flashlight, it might be a help to her.
