20 answers

Daughter Not Doing Well in School.

My 13 year old loves school, is a friend to all, but her teachers all say the same. " she is great to have in class, works hard turns it all in on time but, if you are not walking her through things step by step she gets lost." I have the same trouble at home, she will even start to cry. I am already working with the school to have her tested for different things, but that can take some time. what can I do at home with her to help?

What can I do next?

Featured Answers

When my daughter was younger she was diagnosed with ADHD. She hated the medicine but had a hard time following step by step without it. In the end, her problem was about anxiety, something you may want to have evaluated by a mental health professional. But before that was diagnosed correctly, we tried having her eat coffee beans (which she loved), which helped her stay focused without the "drugs". Good luck. T.

Hi C.,

I do not know what state you are in, but in MI you have 30 days if you have requested testing for special education. You can ask for, if you did not recieve, a parents book of rights. It is a busy time in special education now but there is still a 30 day limit. Have you asked her teachers if they have tried anything different at school to help her through the steps? Has she had this difficulty since she has been in school or just since she has been in middle school? Maybe she needs the directions written down for her and placed at her desk. This could be done for any notes too. They could have a copy made for her. I don't want to over whelm you with questions or ideas.

D. O

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Hi C.,
I had the same problem with my daughter but she was only 7. She would get lost and not understand what was going on. I talked to her doctor and had her tested for ADD. Seems that was the problem. We found that putting her on 10 MG of Addrall helps her a great deal! It only helps her when she is in school and by night time it's out of her system, we haven't had any problems with it eaither. I know that some people do have problems with it, but we haven't. We make sure she does her homework right when she gets home so it's still there a bit, but even if not we can sit down with her and help her out. You may want to talk to your daughters doctor.

Hi C.,

I would have her hearing checked by a specialist. I am now 43. As an infant, I would get fevers from my vaccinations which caused me to be hearing impaired. I never did well in school and unfortunately did not have teachers all the way through school who guided me or reconized my problem. My own mother (a registered nurse) when I got older and found out about my hearing problem, told me she thought I was always just ignoring her. Now that I do know of my hearing problem, looking back I can see why I was always treated differently. People didn't know that I was not understanding things so they assumed that I was rude, ignorant, or stupid.

good luck!

Hi C.,

I do not know what state you are in, but in MI you have 30 days if you have requested testing for special education. You can ask for, if you did not recieve, a parents book of rights. It is a busy time in special education now but there is still a 30 day limit. Have you asked her teachers if they have tried anything different at school to help her through the steps? Has she had this difficulty since she has been in school or just since she has been in middle school? Maybe she needs the directions written down for her and placed at her desk. This could be done for any notes too. They could have a copy made for her. I don't want to over whelm you with questions or ideas.

D. O

C.-
Sorry so late in responding. Does your daughter have a learning disability? I have the same problem as your daughter to a point. Is she able to tell you how to do it but is unable to implement it? I am able to tell you how to do a math problem but my brain will not tell my hands how to write it. It is a very frustrating thing to deal with. I didn't get diagnosis until I was 35 yrs old. I received great marks in school especially if they (teachers) explained everything.

Learning disabilities are heredity. Does anyone else seem to have that problem in the family?

Good Morning C.,
There is hope. I too have a daughter that loves school, is a friend to all, a very hard worker and a pleasure to have in class. She is currently in the 6th grade at a public school. She has struggled since kindergarten, repeated kindergarten
because this public school didn't have a junior first, long story short, she has been tested and retested by the school and I was told that she has an auditory processing disability. My husband and I took her to a psychologist in the Ann Arbor area back in the 4th grade. He told us after a 2 hour session, that there was nothing wrong with her, that she is a little slow but, don't worry she'll catch up! That said, he also added to enroll her in piano lessons or music where she would have to use both hands. It's that left brain, right brain thing. She needs to exercise and develop both sides equally and strong. My husband and I have had 5 meetings with the school so far this year. The 5th was yesterday. I'm constantly on them because once she entered into middle school (this year), they had her pulled out of all the general classrooms and in with the lowest of low students. I'm not saying anything against these other students, they are wonderful children too! I just wonder how many more are in classes like this because the teachers don't have the time to spend with students like this and their classrooms are so over crowded. We push to get our kids the help and then we're pushing to get them the education they deserve! I've been told that the course she's on now will not qualify her to graduate with a high school diploma but, she will get a certificate of completion. This is because of the new curriculum. We did have a great meeting yesterday. The good news is, I had our daughter moved into a team taught general ELA class. Well, guess what! She's doing great! We don't know why but, her writting has improved over the last several weeks and she wants to be in these classrooms and Not be pulled out. She does need to be pulled out for math. This is very difficult for her. I have a wonderful pool of info. as well as websites if you're interested. I hope this has been helpful. When it comes to our children, we ARE their best advocate!
Have an awesome day!
K. W.
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I would suggest a neuropsychological evaluation, not by the school. It is a rigorous, all-day evaluation by a neuropsychologist, and it will flush out any dyslexia, ADD, or learning disability she may have. Good luck!

H.

Do you have the opportunity to try Sylvan? It has a heck of a reputation. Talk with the counselor.

I had a similar problem with two of my children. My suggestion would be to make an appointment with your doctor. Our problem was diagnosed as two different forms of ADHD. Our daughter was helped by a very good tutor and our son with medication. Some times the brain will not let them stay focused, so extra help is necessary.

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