Daughter Favors Father

Enjoy the times the child wants to be with you. Do not sweat this situation. At some point, the child will favor you over the other parent. Hang in there.

Enjoy it :) She will go thru phases when she is a Mommy's girls too. I like when the girls go thru their Daddy phase so that i can get more things done and enjoy sitting on the couch reading.

Great news, IT IS A STAGE. It is actually documented in popular baby books and research. My husband is a favorite for my 18 month old too. :-) I do stay at home with her so that lessens the effect on me because my hubby works all day so I get to be with her.

If there is any way for you to be home more you should do it. :-) It is SO worth it. Even if you have to skimp on expenses. The time with your daughter is precious and fleeting. I know that some moms, namely the single ones or those with ailing husbands, can not stay home and they don't really have a choice whether or not to work. If you do have that choice I say GO FOR IT. You can always work later in life but you can never get that time back with your precious daughter. I know I am being bold to say these things, I hope you know I mean them sincerely. You will never regret making the choice to stay home with your children. :-)

I've been where you are at and it is heartbreaking even while you love that your daughter and husband are close. I feared that I would end up not having a good relationship with her when she was older. Now she just turned 13 and we are closer than she and her dad. It may be that your daughter and husband are more alike. I worked a lot then, too, and he was with her more than I could be, but their personalities are also very similar. Looking at it from this side of things, I realize what a blessing it is. I worked really hard at the relationship with my daughter and now she and her dad are not as close and I wish they were. Just like any relationship, there is an ebb and flow. Right now you're in the ebb, but it will be your turn before you know it. She's not choosing him over you to hurt you and it really is a blessing that she enjoys him. As she gets older and matures there will be many things where she won't want her dad, but will want you (like buying that first bra or having "the talk"). Continue to love her and spend time with her and before you know it that cycle will have shifted.

Hi T.,

I've been there! When our daughter was a baby she did the same thing to me. About the time I was resolved to the fact that that's how it was going to be, she turned the tables. Then she kept turning them - back and forth. I was staying at home at the time.

She's almost 11 and it seems like there are still times when she has a preference.

Don't worry, it's natural and enjoy the blooming relationship with she and her daddy. It is so very important!

Take advantage of their time together, too and pamper yourself while you can!

My daughter did this as well and I stay home. For me it was a blessing because she was my second and I was prego with number 3........I loved that she wanted him. It is a stage, so take heart.....it will not last forever. If you are both (you and your hubby) always home at the same time try taking doing something with just her. Take her to the park or even to the store for a quick trip, it amazes me how much that can do.
Good luck

This is so normal. Believe me, it will change in time. But for now, accept her attitude, even though it hurts. She still needs to know you are there whether she shows it or not. She knows you love her. Let her and daddy have their time; your time is coming...

This is very normal. it is the same for me except that both my kids are always attached to Dad. It is usuall a fight as to who gets to sit next to dad. this is because my work is more demanding. But given that there are lots of absentee father out there, i take pride in the fact that my husband enjoys his children's company. Do not worry. It will balance up as time goes on. It is starting to with my 6 and 4 year olds

Hi T.,

I know it's h*** o* you, but hang in there. It's completely normal for little ones to seem much morea attached to one parent for a period of time (yes, dads too!). Don't worry, it will subside. Then, at another point it will go the other way, and again and again. Children are fickle and go through A LOT of stages. My son and daughter are 11 and almost 13, and they still cycle at times. Sometimes I feel a little lonely, sometimes I feel bad for my husband because he seems on the outside of things. Luckily, with two at least one seems close most of the time!

Try to relax and appreciate what a great dad your husband is, and how wonderful it is that they are building a strong relationship. Dads are tremendously important to a girl's well-being.

Wishing you well and saying a prayer for your family,

D. B.

Hi T.,

My daughter did the same thing starting about 15 months. She usually preferred her father, occassionally me, but usually him. I just had to think back on my relationship with my father and kept reminding myself that is what makes a "daddy" for a little girl. It was so difficult and I hate to admit it, but I was jealous sometimes. I can say that while my daughter is still a "daddy's girl" she now likes to spend time with me also. On the flip side, we now have a son who usually wants to spend time with mommy...I talked with many of my friends who experienced the same thing and I realized that I just had to let go and be okay with her feelings. It is normal and it will pass, but be happy that she loves her daddy and they have a loving relationship.

Good luck, A.

We went through the same thing, but on both ends - at one point my son was more attached to Dad and wanted him only, at another point it was only Mommy - and that was EXHAUSTING! I stayed home and watched other kids too so my son was with me all the time. So maybe at one point his was bored with Mom who he saw all the time, but then my poor husband had the heartbreak of working long days and coming home to a toddlwe who STILL only wanted Mommy! So try not to resent it too much - it may swinf the other way soon, and then your husband will need all the support and sympathy you can give him!!!

MY daughter favors me and I would love it if it was the other way around right now. I could leave the house by myself and EVERYTHING! I know that this does not help, but it will change once she figures out that you have the pocketbook!

L

I actually love it when my son gets into 'daddy stages'. I love to see them bond, giggle, and get so close. It makes me love my husband even more and it makes me feel like a great mom to encourage that type of close bond between father and child.

That being said, when my son is WAY into the mommy, there are things my husband does that you might try. 1) start a new tradition with your daughter. My husband started taking my son out every Saturday morning to get coffee and the car washed. Our son really looked forward to this special time, even if he was All Mommy All The Time while at home. 2) Send your husband out to do stuff like go the grocery store so you can have 1-on-1 time with your daughter at home. Take that special time to do something new like decorate cupcakes or something else messy and fun. She'll love it. 3) use the time to recharge YOUR batteries. Take a long bath with a good book and glass of wine.

This stage will be over before you know it. You're raising a wonderful daughter who is learning that BOTH of her parents are there for her. Consider it a compliment to your parenting instead of something that breaks your heart.

T.,

I know it doesn't feel good! But in my experience of having two boys (now 3 1/2 and 2), this is just a stage. Please don't think your job is the reason for this. I stay at home and my kids still did this. Actually, this is probably a really important stage, for all of you. She needs to bond with her Daddy...and I'm sure her Daddy loves this. I remember with my first one, it was especially difficult, because I didn't know there was an end in sight. The best you can, I would try to relish this time and let Daddy do as much as he can with her. The time is coming when she most likely will want nothing to do with anyone but you...and those times can be a little draining as well. She is only 17 months old...I promise you her intention is not to hurt you. She is just trying to navigate her way through life as a 17 month-old. :)

My husband was a stay at home father until I had my second child so he was with my oldest daughter 24/7 until she was almost 6. She is 7 now and she still really favors him. Especially because Mommy is the disciplinarian and Daddy is so far from it. Sort of a double wammy against me! It really hurts my feelings even though I know it shouldn't. I just do my best to always explain things to her. I make sure she knows how much I love her and I give her reasons for the rules we lay down. I also stay really involved in her school and her cheer squad. I can't give any advice since we are not on the other side of it yet, but hopefully it helps in some way. Don't get discouraged if it takes a loooonng time.

yes, this is normal for the situation you describe. try not to take it personally life is so very short and you won't be regretting that you spent more time with your family. This will pass. make goodbye and hello traditions (sayings, songs, special routines) that she can connect with and look forward to. This is something she will view as a constant. my 8 children each have their special thing with their dad. my first daughter was extremely preferential with me but she developed a little 5 - 10 minute routine when her dad got home from work (they would play ring around the rosie, spin around, airplane ride, dance close, and horsie ride) and she made sure he didn't miss or do the routine out of order....and she began to look forward to it. As he affirmed her in this and where she was in her preferences, a deep and beautiful relationship developed. They are very, very close now and he is always in her heart and forefront of her mind. Bless you as you find a job that lets your family come first.

I just posted the same problem. Mine is only 10 mos old and does the same. But she seems to favor everyone BUT me. Which is even worse.

And she doesn't see dad any more than me. But he's definitely her favorite. It's so painful.

Sorry that you're going through this b/c I know it hurts. It makes you doubt yourself as a mom, doesn't it? At least for me that's how it is.