Daughter Afraid of Sugar Bugs

Hi K.,
What you have on your hands is a teaching opportunity. Using inapproprate (and silly) terms like sugar bugs is why this country needs to import scientists. Now I like a good myth/story as much as the next fellow. Hey I, personally, think Barney ROCKS! But we (parents, adults) need to realize how aware and eager kids are. So this is what I'd do -- "Honey, I've been thinking about it and you know what -- I don't think the dentist realizes (knows) what a big girl you are and how smart you are. He used the baby (little kid)word "sugar bug" the really word is bacteria. Bacteria live all over the place --inside us, on our skin, all over the world. Some bacteria help us. Bacteria inside us help make vitamins to keep us healthy. Some bacteria like the bacteria in our mouth can cause us troubles like cavities, that's the kind of bacteria your dentist was talking about. When we brush and floss we keep them in line (otherwise they get rowdy and cause trouble - ha ha!) We can go to the library or go on the internet and look for pictures if you'd like." Of course you would have found the website and maybe checked the library online before hand. You could turn it into a bacteria model craft project, a song, a posterboard diagram, etc. Bacteria knowledge is the gift that keeps on giving - Why do we wash our hands? Why do we cover our nose when we sneeze? Before you know it you'll be explaining viruses. Use the internet to fill in the blanks of your understanding. Have fun knowing YOU are educating your child. If the questions/ answers are getting away from you it's ok to say, "That's a good question, I don't know the answer let's look it up " "I'm not sure, but I think Daddy knows let's ask him" " That's a good investagation question. I bet a reseacher in a college somewhere is looking for the answer right now!"
Or conversely, "Okay, now you're being silly! That's not scientific. Do you want to keep talking about this or would you rather do something else? Whatever you like."
Lastly sometimes your child is so aware they ask a question that takes you breath away -- life, death, morality -- and the conversation goes were you least expect. To my mind you are left with this response, "Yes that is puzzling/sad/scary/unfair, but this world is a beautiful place and I am so glad God gave you to me, I am so happy we are together." Children are never too young to learn science can't answer all questions, but invesigating the answers can be fun.

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Hi - first-borns tend to be worriers! They over-think things and stew about them generally, esp. when they're young. Yes, I'm sure she'll outgrow it - just be very positive and patient. Also, with my first-born, humor was just key in helping him with stuff like this. You want to keep things light and silly, however, do not ever make light of her feelings - give them credit and validity and just keep showing her examples of how other children have healthy teeth even though they can eat sweets because they brush, and because they see the dentist. I'm sure it'll end soon.
M.

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Ok Ok, lets get this straight, bacteria cause plaque to form on one’s teeth. Specifically Streptococcus Mutans and they live in your mouth all the time. They metabolize sugar (sucrose, glucose, fructose, and lactose) which includes most food. Metabolizing these sugars turns them into lactic acid, which erodes holes in tooth enamel. If I were you I would not lie to her and tell her these things don’t exist as some here suggest. But I would modify what your dentist has told her. Tell her that these bugs come into her mouth only when the food has to be left on her teeth too long. I liked the suggestion that the sound of tooth brushing scares sugar bugs away. Call or email your dentist to explain your situation and insist she back you up next time you see her. I think the whole point here is to avoid tooth decay, and the best way to do that is if your daughter is motivated to brush her teeth.

Call that dentist back! Explain the situation to him and set up a one on one with your daughter and him so he can ease her fears.

I've got to agree with Marie...I'm a first born and I am such an over thinker...everthing is literal!!

My son is 2 years old and has been going to the dentist for the past five months, and his dentist is great about making sure she explains everything. I can see where your little girl's dentist was trying to help with using something that she could visualize, but if she's like most visual learners (and first borns) we take everything to the extreme. Sometimes I lay awake at night picturing what the actual effects of something might look like...LOL.

Your little girl sounds like she is smart enough to understand if you explain to her that the dentist was trying to make a point...if you have to print some pics off the web of tooth decay (mild ones), and show her their is no such things as actual 'sugar bugs'. For me concrete evidence is the best cure for overwhelming fear of the unreal.

While your little one will outgrow this phase, she's just going to manifest it in other ways...for me I'm a planner and am super detail oriented. Just be supportive and loving and keep up the dialogue you have with her and she'll be just fine.

Good Luck.

I would explain to her that as long as you take good care of your teeth by brushing, flossing and going to the dentist for check-ups the "sugar-bugs" won't hang around. When she starts asking about them and her food, just say "you'll be fine as long as we brush your teeth later". I like the other suggestion of letting her pick out a special toothbrush.

How about getting the dentist to re-tract the word bugs. Get a kids teeth book at library that mentions plaque or decay. Really if you are brushing her teeth, there is no need to scare her with the term bugs!

I wonder if she's afraid of "sugar bugs" causing decay/cavities or if she is more literal thinking there might be actual bugs that come from some food that will end up in her mouth??? I know the dentist tries to explain the decay process with the term "sugar bugs" but your daughter might be worried about it more literally...who wants bugs in their mouth? :) M.

K., small children take our language literal, so bugs are literally bugs whether they are sugar or not. It is possible that in your child's mind there are actual bugs creeping around. Yes, this would creep me out also. This is a very irresponsible way of putting fear of sugar in the minds of young children and the nurse at the dentist office should realize this. Being honest about the reality of sugar and cavaties is appropriate. An age appropriate conversation with your child may alleviate the situation. Something like, "What she means is more like germs, not bugs like flies. Germs can give you a cold, like sugar can give you a cavity if you don't take care of your teeth by brushing." Ho

Hi K., I think your dentist used a poor choice of words, my daughter at 5 would have reacted the sane way, what I would do is tell your daughter, the word sugar bugs, is just a phrase they use when your teeth are not clean, not like actual bugs that crawl on the ground, you need to find something she can relate to that has a name that it is called, but it's not actually that, let me try and make sinse, for example if you have a coffee mug tree, it's called a tree but its not really a tree, find something that she can relate to. I am 51 and I have never heard of sugar bugs. Hope this helps. J. L.

Kids that age are very literal. She's undoubtedly thinking very literally, imagining actual bugs crawling around in her mouth. No wonder she's freaked out!

There is such a thing as giving too much information. Even a very bright, articulate preschooler can't make sense of, "Most foods cause sugar bugs." From now on, keep your answers very short and precise - "You don't have to worry as long as you brush. Brushing keeps your teeth healthy," and, "This is a healthy food. It will help you (pick one: have strong muscles, have strong bones, have good eyes, etc.)"

You might want to take her back to the dentist, so the dentist can give her some non scary hints about healthy teeth, like "Eat crunchy vegetables," or "Brush really carefully," and tell her that if she has a treat, to simply brush afterwards. That will make a bigger impression than anything you say, since it's the dentist's advice she's trying to follow.

Could you try to take the focus away from the "sugar bugs" and focus it on things like building "muscles" and a strong brain with good vitamins and minerals from fruit and vegetables. Worth a try. When kids get overly focused on a subject or word they can get freaked out. Just change the subject to something positive.-www.weelicious.com

Just a guess, but is your dentist Dr. Regala? This is the very reason that I took my kids out of her practice!

At 4 1/2 your daughter is intelligent enough to know the truth - there is no such thing as a "sugar bug." Tell her that her dentist is misguided in making up a silly name and imaginary animal for sugar. Sugar is just sugar. It's fun to eat, but it's not healthy for your body or your teeth. There are no bugs in it!!

As parents, we should strive to be truthful with our kids as much as humanly possible. This is how they learn to trust us and the reason that they will come to us in the future with questions - because they know they'll get a real answer. Tell it to your daughter straight and then either set her dentist straight as well, or switch to another practice.

Best of luck to you!!!