Dads & Newborns

Don't put so much pressure on yourself....it took me at least 6 months to 1 year to feel like myself again....and even then....if you are breastfeeding....you have that to deal with.

If you just had a baby....hormones are raging. Eat right...take care of your family....and cut yourself some slack. It sometimes takes time for you to get back to "couple time".

2 moms found this helpful

Hi there M.,

I am not positive that I can help, but I might be able to. I am a local Pure Romance consultant in the Lewisville area. I am basically an expert on enhancing intimacy, sensuality, sexuality, etc. I went through the same thing after I had my son - and I KNOW that is extremely common, but there is hope out there. If you are interested in a catalog or have any questions directly about what I would suggest, please let me know and I will help anyway that I can. In case you want to browse my site, check out www.cristinhobbs.pureromance.com

Hang in there!
C.

1 mom found this helpful

M.--don't feel bad, I didn't want anything to do with my husband during and after my pregnancy. I'd had a miscarriage previously and I was bleeding due to placenta previa so I WAS NOT going to do anything with my husband until the very end of my pregnancy. After the baby, I was breastfeeding and just to tired to do much. I don't like my body as much as I used to either. Things will get back to normal soon. Don't worry yourself too much.

1 mom found this helpful

It does take time to feel back to normal, as I'm sure you felt with your first child.

I think it is still important to have dates with your husband, even with the baby. Get a sitter for the 3 year old, and you and your hubby catch a movie (I just nursed mine to sleep during them), go out to dinner.

Or cook a special dinner together, have deep conversations, rent a movie.

The same thing happend to me after having 2 babies in 2 years. So I joined the gym and got an hour of Mommy time everyday. I lost 30 pounds and feel and look awesome not just for my husband but for me as a woman seperate from anyone else. I started when my son was 4 months old and I was still nursing him. Good luck!!

Remember, you have a newborn and your hormones are
re-adjusting.
Do not put pressure on yourself if it is less than 6 weeks
since delivery.
Talk to your husband, he himself is adjusting to a newborn.
And be in the new baby angel and active 3 year old.
If you still don't feel desirable and your hubby said he
finds you so...talk to your doctor. Make sure it is not
post partum.

Congratulations on your new angel. *and remember your 3 year
old is active with wanting you to play too.*

Hey M.,
First of all, congratulations! If it makes you feel any better, I had no interest in sex whatsoever for at 3 months after my son was born. I found out I had post-partum depression, and I was way too exhausted to do anything outside of nursing. But, you will get better, I promise. I started feeling better once I was able to exercise again (the Zoloft kicking in helped, too).

Just take care of yourself, your family, and be open with your hubby about how you feel and ask for his help. Things will fall into place soon. Good luck!!

There are several sides to every story... but I kind of hold the opinion that being sexually attracted to something is what drove you to be interested in them in the first place... it seems a lot of moms have kids, get comfortable and just let themselves go...

if you make YOURSELF a priority... newborn or not... you'll be more comfortable in your own skin. Keeping you fit, cared for, take care of, pretty/beautiful/sexy for YOU does WORLDS for your self esteem....

However, pregnancy is HARD on a body.... and he should stand by you until you get back to your old self...... :) it's hard to feel sexy, put you first, etc. with a newborn and a 3 year old so you have my thoughts with ya... :) Just remember that it's a two sided coin too... he needs to keep your attention by trying to look good for you as well. :)

you are probably more concerned about it than he is. I read in a baby mag. that 85% still find their wives attractive after childbirth! HTH

Hi M., I felt the same way i had two babys less then a year apart and two c-sections. I just did my best to get back into shape lost 60 pounds and feel great. I am not saying you have to if your husband really loves you it's not going to matter, he married you for you. Hope this helps and good luck in everything.

I was the same way after having my daughter. I was tired and just felt unattractive. I worried that it was really going to effect our relationship. The second I started feeling like my self again...I got pregnant and I'm back to square one. Just give it sometime, and there could be a chance your horomones are a little low...give it sometime and try to spend some alone time together.