Curious About Soda/candy

Updated on April 23, 2008
J.W. asks from Culver City, CA
119 answers

after reading a few posts i am curious - do you give your children soda/candy? my 3 year old has never had soda - and only rare pieces of candy. i don't think there is ever a need for a child to drink soda (nor eat candy for that matter). my family has a sweet tooth - so we do not 'ban' sweets - we eat ice cream, cookies, etc - but in moderation. i also never use food (sweets) as a reward for my child. i just feel like i am the only one doing this and wanted to know if there were other moms who felt the same way? thanks!
J.

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B.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi J.,
No you are not the only mom who is like this. My daughter is 13 months old and has had 2 pieces of cake. One on her birthday and one at her birthday party three weeks later. I still breastfeed, make all her food myself (not processed canned pastas, fruity puffs, etc.) my family also has a sweet tooth and my boyfriend eats icecream every night. Sometimes my daughter gets a few bites, most of the time she doesn't. I am also an alternative doctor like mama. Don't fret...there are other moms out there that believe in health, nutrition and good wholesome food.
Hippie Dippie Mommy B.

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B.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

I have a 17 year old daughter and, like you, I never gave her soda/candy when she was young. She has never developed a taste for sweets but somewhere around 12 or 13 she "discovered" soda and drinks it too often, in my opinion. The point is, someday you will lose control - be prepared. And BE STRONG NOW - I agree with you completely.

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C.K.

answers from San Diego on

I'm very health-conscious woman since I was young. I don't keep soda in the house, but we do allow sweets, in moderation. I grew up with sweets in the house and they were never a temptation anywhere because I always had access to them. My mom fed us well, so we were never hungry.
I think that's the key: feed children well (healthfully) and they won't crave the instant fix, as many adults do today, but still have candy available so it doesn't become a taboo.
Good Luck

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E.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

My son (5 yrs.) drinks mostly water, strict consumption of limited juice and a specific portion of milk. He doesn't drink anything carbonated and I've never given it to him. When he is away from me and someone offers it to him he says "I can't have it". One time he was given a Sprite and he thought it was water (lid/straw). He spit it out saying he didn't like it.

He loves candy and I only allow him to eat it at Halloween and Valentines (due to societal pressures I'm not willing to fight). I limit the intake and do offer him other snack type items such as ice cream (I've gotten him used to SKINNY COW), and cookies, etc. (His favorite is pumpkin pie!)

Not exactly the same but definitely, you are not alone. I often think I'm alone in the fact that my child isn't offered television (cable/public access/reception at all) except specific DVD's/VHS's. I do not personally know of a mom that does that but I'm sure they are out there.

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R.G.

answers from Las Vegas on

Hi J..
I TOTALLY ban sugar in my home...PERIOD. I used to let my kids have it, but stopped about a year ago. I've learned more about natural foods in the last year, so we try to sustain an organic/chemical free home. Check out the book "Lick the Sugar Habit". It has alot of info. I can tell you this...since we stopped the sugar, my daughter is a totally different child. It's an answer to prayer for me. I do have a source where I buy pure unfiltered and unheated HONEY, and I have learned to bake the normal stuff with it...cookies, cakes, pies, everything. Its made a huge difference in our home..the best thing I've ever done for my kids!!!!!!

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M.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

If you give your young child soda or candy, they will crave the sugar. High Frutcose Corn Syrup tricks your brain in to wanting more. Obesity and diabetese is at an all time high in children so to answer your question about soda, no I don't give it to my kids 5 and almost 3. I don't drink it because of all the crap in it so I wouldn't give it to my kids. As for candy, I am more flexible here. I believe in moderation it is OK, it has it's place. Birthday parties, Halloween, etc.. We don't have any sugar in the home but I don't say no when it is a special treat. What I have found is my kids don't want it. Mind you, if given a piece of candy, they will take it! But they don't ask for candy, if they see it in the store, they just comment on how it is junk food. I feel great about the way I have done this, my kids know what junk food is, they know when they get to have it and they are fine not having it. Make sense?
I said I don't have sugar in the home, let me correct this, we have healthy fruit leather and a limited amount of snacks that may contain a little sugar but these items are purchased at Trader Joe's and I'm a big label reader so there are certain ingredients that I stay away from. If I make baked goods I use Sucanat (natural sugar cane). A sweet treat to my kids is a bowl of strawberries, mango or blueberries.

Everything in moderation - for us and our kids! With soda though, if you can stall them on this one as long as possible, I would.

To respond to an earlier post: I'm not worried about obesity or cavities with my kids. They get a lot of excersise and their teeth are brushed twice daily. The reason I limit sugar and don't give soda is because it isn't healthy. When the kids are young, ages birth to about 4 or 5 we are taming their tastebuds. If they eat a lot of foods with sugar, that is what they will want, if butter is put on all their veggies, they will want butter on their veggies always, if salt is on everything, they will need salt on everything. We should be giving foods to them at this age in their natural state. If we do the hard work during their younger years, then when they are older they will be more likely to make the right choices when left to decide on their own. If my kids want soda later (much later hopefully) then they can have it. Since it hasn't been in their diet at an early age, they may not like it or may not need a soda a day, etc..I hope that makes sense. It seems often, people think if we limit sugar and avoid soda, we are somehow depriving our kids of lifes true riches? Serious?? Have you had a sweet mango? I'd take that over a bag of M&M's anyday!

M.

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T.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

GOOD FOR YOU! I think sugar is like poison to all of us, so we don't do junk food...and it works well.. we are like you and have sweets that also have some other ingidients that have some value or counter action to the sugar... we do some other sweeteners like maple, date, molassas, when we bake...and once in awhile we stop by Sees candy and each get 1 piece-
I have 9,7 and 5 year olds... and they know the story...
I also nursed (7 years straight with all the over laps) home birthed, clothed diaperd, co-sleep and see homeopaths, so don't worry we're out there too..and we apprietiate you...
Bless

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R.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

Congratulations! The longer you can keep your child from these unhealthful choices the better. We have never given our daughter soda, dilute juice with water when possible, and are sorry we didn't create stronger boundaries with regards to candy (and TV) as once we allowed her to have any, she started wanting/demanding more. I know dozens of like-minded moms and am pleased our Montessori school has a no-sugar policy.

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T.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

I'm with you, J.! I can't think of any reason in the world to give a child soda. It is literally handing your child a cup of chemicals and sugar.

We, too, will give the occasional sweet as a "special treat" but my kids understand why we only eat small amounts of candy - because it's not healthy for our bodies.

Recent studies have proven that a person's life-long eating habits are formed in the first five years, so if kids are loaded up on sugar all the time, sugar is what they will be looking for after they become adults.

Kudos to you for teaching your children healthy eating habits!

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T.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

J. you are my kinda Mama!!! Hahaha.....you keep doing what you're doing!
When I had my first child I was bent on him NEVER getting any candy or junk food. It was fine until he hit the age when he got involved in birthday parties...or when I had him in Tiny tots so that he had other kids to play with and I subsequently met other Moms (and we are still friends today).

The first time he had anything considered 'sweet' was a piece of birthday cake. I debated for a long time should I let him have it. And then I realized that within my own life growing up - whether it was the era, or, lack of money, etc - we just didn't get any. When we did finally get sweets - it was so overwhelming you just wanted to OVER indulge!! So I decided everything in moderation. My son took one bite of the cake, made a face, and was done...hahaha....and asked for some grapes! His body had already come accustomed to not having all that sugar in it that he actually made his own choice at 4. Now, at 7, with school valentines, Xmas, holiday stuff that kids do....he brings home the 'goodies', he gets a couple of pieces and the rest go into the 'canisters'. Which he ALWAYS forgets about....and most of the candy eventually gets thrown out until new 'stock' comes in from an event.

My daughter is now 18 mos and also gets nothing except organic treats.
We shop more places like Trader Joes, Henry's, Whole Foods market....for snacks that are MUCH healthier if we indulge in chips for our sandwich's or something sweet, that's where we get them. You can find stuff with more natural sugars instead of high fructose corn syrup stuff there.
In fact I finally mellowed enough that I'm happy that we eat about 80% organic and healthy...with the other 20% giving some breathing room for pizza after my sons sporting events, etc...or again, classroom events where cakes and all the candy seems to be dispersed the most. {;o)

And you are absolutely right not to use sweets as a reward or punishment for that matter. Food should just be the necessary tool for this 'machine' called our bodies - to run on.
The 'fuel' shouldn't be a bargaining chip.
And again, there isn't any reason in the world a kid needs soda!! It's enough that they get juices that have sugar and even those should get watered down. Drinking fruited sodas is NOT the same as eating the actual piece of fruit.

But the sodas are literally so damaging and it sucks out calcium from your body to mention one. Did we all forget the tooth in the soda experiment when we were in elementary school? Didn't take long for it to eat up the enamel from the tooth and destroy it. No reason for soda.

I quite all sodas back in 1998. I could never imagine going back to them.
But if you or your family are 'missing' the soda thing? One of the better vitamin waters (herbalist recommends VW over Soda's any day)...is
Langers Enhanced H20 zero calorie vitamin enhanced water. They have different flavors (I get mine at Ralphs when on sale) to choose from. They have NO high fructose corn syrup, NO crystalline fructose, GMO free, No artificial colors or flavors, NO sodium, NO preservatives. It does have some sucralose - and the jury is still out on that.
I'm not big on sugar substitutes so I limit this brand. But the 'real' vitamin waters from Glaceau has low sugar but it's derived from a real source. So that one would be up to you.
If you are missing the 'bubbles' from soda's...then mix these vitamin waters with Crystal Geyser's Natural sparkling mineral waters. That'll give you your 'soda' feel. {;o)
(comes in regular, orange, lemon, lime or mixed berry flavors).

Anyway, you just keep being that baby wearing, 'full term' nursing, cosleeping, tried to cloth diaper, alternative doctor type of Mama....and keep up the good work! You are absolutely on the right road.
I've been down that 'other' road long before kids....and it just doesn't work. As we all should know as we get older.

Quick short stories. All the Moms I became friends with from Tiny tots ...ALL changed their kids diets to align more to what they saw me do with my son. Behaviors changed! Kids calmed down, they did better in class, so many benefits too many to tell. And they all now go to the chiropractor and see the herbalist. Again got rid of all the ill's the kids had had some since birth! Everything from rashes, skin disorders, to asthma....it was amazing. But really? Didn't we ALL learn once upon a time - what goes in is what comes out? That goes for food and drugs especially.

The kids are all doing well today, one Mom even avoided surgery for her 3 yr old who had BOAT loads of health issues. He was days away from going under the knife to take out tonsils and adenoids. ONE adjustment....ONE....this poor 3 yr old slept for the first time in his life. His nose stopped running and he started eating regularly. After 4 months of care, his 'grayish' face was a new normal color and his eyes clear, he was a new little guy. Not to mention he could now run forwards instead of sideways. Turns out he was a 'breech' baby and they had 'yanked' on him so much coming out at birth he was like a twisted pretzel.
Her western doctors were flabbergasted....to say the least. But clearly lost that customer ...even though they told Mama that he would DIE if he didn't have the surgery. Can you imagine.

I never thought I was doing anything out of the ordinary...until I had kids. Eating a certain way just seemed like a big DUH to me. Know what I mean? So to me of course if kids eat all this garbage you're going to have behavior problems, allergies, food reactions (like the red dyes), etc etc etc. But becoming a Mom so late in life with most of the Moms I know being on average 15 yrs younger then I am - I saw what was going on out there in the world. And I was appalled.

In FACT, when I WAS pregnant the first time around...our friends around us who all had kids already ranging from 2 on up, who know how my husband and I were....said, you just wait...you'll get so busy that you'll be feeding them that pop tart in the morning or burger and fries after school, etc. I laughed...said it'll never happen. THEN they got upset with us when they discovered we had no intention on letting them ever HAVE fries and get hooked on that level of fast food!! Actually UPSET at us like we were DEPRIVING our soon to be kid! I was stunned.
Needless to say, if you can pop in a pop tart you can whip up an egg or something healthy just as easy....and of course my kids never get 'that' kind of diet, busy or not.
Well, over the years, those same friends who got so upset with us for not allowing our kids to indulge in Americas favorite food - french fries...had to start battling their kids weights! (They had four)...because sadly they were all becoming these little porkers and fried food aholics and the parents were having a heck of a time trying to THEN change their diets to a healthier one since they started having problems! They told us later - they got it. They wished they had 'understood' back then.

So all that to say it's REFRESHING to hear from a Mom like you doing the things you do - that are so much better for your kid (s) then what I learned so many AREN'T doing.

I'm working on fighting that...hahaha...one Mom at a time....for the sake of the children who will be our future leaders one day. Maybe we can churn out better ones then what we have to choose from right now!

AMEN???

God Bless J.!

47 yr old Mom here with a 7 yr old son and 18 mo old girl...married to the love of my life for 14 yrs. Blessed blessed blessed.

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J.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

You are not alone... but close to it!
I find it surprising how many parents give there kids sodas and candy even though they know it is not good for them. I don't get it.
My daughter is 4 and just discovered candy last Halloween I couldn't hold off the experience any longer! She ate quite a bit that night but that was it. Halloween was over and she didn't even ask for more.
We don't have candy or soda in our house.
The hard part is when they are around other kids who do eat junk food.
I talk to my daughter about the benefit of healthy foods and how sugary, junk foods are for birthday parties and special occasions etc. She gets it and if there is no junky stuff in the house you never have to argue the matter.
I am not mean, we do go out for ice cream and it feels special. We make cookies and muffins and breads, they just aren't laden with sugar.
I believe that using sweets (or any food) as a reward or tool for good/bad behavior sends a bad message and causes a bad relationship with food.
I am with you!
Granola lovin' tree hugger. :-)

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C.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi J. - I think as parents we need to be realistic. I can tell you as a mother of three young boys, that it's next to impossible to prevent them from ever drinking a soda or eating a piece of candy because of the birthday parties, visits to friends' homes, and snack stand options at the baseball field. I think an occassional sip or piece of candy is OK. I don't believe in depriving a child of a taste now and then. Having said that, I recommend you teach your children about healthy choices and that soda and candy are not good four our bodies and that they shouldn't be consumed often. You're doing the best thing avoiding these things all together as much as you can. Because you've avoided it in early development he probably won't like it as much as kids who get the taste of sweets early. Moreso than an occassional candy, I am more concerned about children and soda. There is so much sugar in soda. It's bad for the teeth, chemicals in soda leech calcium from our bones and damage our cells. A soda per day can cause someone to gain 15 lbs in one year. Diet sodas are even worse because of aspartame, an artificial sweetener does more damage. If you're interested in some more information on aspartane, let me know and I'll email them to you. The best thing you can do for your child is shop for the freshest fruits and vegetables, teach your child why they are so important for good health, and help them to learn to like them and eat plenty every day. As an insurance plan, you can give him Juice Plus chewables which is the nutritional essence of 17 whole food fruits, vegetables and grains in chewable form. My family has eating them every day for three years and I'm convinced of the tremendous value to our health. I want to share it with others who want the best health opportunity for their own family and that's why I became a distributor... http://www.juiceplus.com/+cc42230. Here's another great site with audio clips you can listen to: http://www.scienceandhealthnews.com/?audio

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M.R.

answers from Las Vegas on

Good job J.. I think that sugar is a drug for our children as a matter of fact for ourselves. It does harm the body in how it is processed through our system. Sometimes we have to go against the systme in order to be healthy.

So many of our chidlren are diagnosed with disorders when it is an issue of the food they eat. So much can be cured by what we eat. Healthy natural foods is the best I beleive that for a God made body we should eat God made food. Keep up the good effort.

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M.E.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi, J.~ I am the mother of ten, and I have always calmly told my children that they are not allowed to have gum, soda, or candy until they are 10. They have ALL accepted that as fact, and I have made it to at least 6 with all of them. Inevitably, a teacher or another mother has given them one of the above, and the rule is broken, but we manage to strictly regulate how much they consume. My children, 37, 34, 22, 21, 8, 8, and 9 have still not had a cavity. The 33 yr old got them as an adult. Only one of them became a "soda-holic"(the one with the cavities, NO surprise!!) I am an insulin dependent diabetic, and I just don't feel that children need sweets to be happy. There is more to life, and I personally look at a ripe, juicy red apple as a marvelous treat. Thankfully, my children feel the same way, and I keep a full fruit bowl on the counter within easy reach of everyone. I applaud you for withholding the candy and soda. They just don't need it. I'm kind of the philosophy that "If God made it~ ENJOY!!" Best wishes to you. Marti

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J.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

I am a 30 year old teacher and mommy to 3 yr old daughter and 9 month old daughter and in our house children do not get soda, I feel like I would not want my children to drink soda until they are in highschool even. Also we don't have sweets either, we don't use them as a reward, our 3 yr old gets coloring books or books. I totally agree with you. And my 3 yr does get treats every so often, but only for special occasions, or of course the grandparents house.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Stick to what you are doing... that is great! No child "has" to have candy or soda... it is a "learned" habit and experience once they get a taste of it. I have done that with my kids as well. Bravo for you :)
~Susan
www.cafepress.com/littlegoogoo

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C.Z.

answers from Los Angeles on

Keep up the good work. My husband and I have never let our 2 year old son have soda and the only sweets he has is when it's somebody's birthday and we have cake and ice cream and we never reward his good behavior with candy. By not letting your son eat candy all of the time, not only are you promoting a healthier lifestyle for your son, but you're also keeping his teeth healthy. Once again, keep up the good work.

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M.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

You are not alone! I never let my children have soda- it has like 35 teaspoons of sugar. Now since my son has started we have made the rule of special occcations only, if soda and candy are the offerings at a birthday he may accept. We do not have candy or soda (even juice boxes have been banned) in the house. My dad always comes for a visit and can't believe I don't give the children sugar with their cereal and salt with dinner. I explained if they don't have that flavor they don't want it. I want my kids healthy, loving fruit and veggies- which they do.

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S.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

My son now 14 loves his Kit Kats.
His baby and toddler history I was thought to be quite rare. The sweetest thing he ever got or even wanted was a cookie.
He was born premature by 12 weeks and has had some intestinal surgeries, but his health is 100%.
To this day I don't give him a Birthday cake on his birthday as he doesn't want it. He doesn't eat cake at Bday parties. I used to think this odd, however as he got to be older I noticed he'd eat chocolate, certain types of ice cream pops and eventually soda. He loved Halloween, Trick or Treating, however gave away all his candy! He drank nothing but milk and water up until he was @ 8 -9 years old. In retrospect, going out to dinner and ordering desert was treated as a "treat" however he would rather fill up on real food, even now.
I don't believe you are the only one who is doing this or feeling this way. It's a gift to witness a child turn down sweets.

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A.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi J.! Don't think that you're alone. My husband and I are certainly in the same frame of thought as you are. We rarely allow our 3 year old to have candy at all...and he rarely asks for it either. When he wants a snack or treat, he'll ask for fruit or a Jamba Juice...which I have to say is such a relief. Of course, when we're at the doctor's office or something, he'll ask for the lolipop, and once in a while, we'll give in, and he's allowed to lick at it on the way home and then it's gone. Typically though, if I offer up a Jamba Juice for his good behavior, the lolipops are simply passed up. Not to mention, we've offered him a sip of soda and he basically spits it out because he doesn't appreciate the bubbles. (thank goodness) It's up to us as parents to help our children make better choices. Absolutely never use food or candy to reward behaviors, there are plenty other things to do. Don't be h*** o* yourself thinking you're just no fun. Our kids will grow up with a healthy understanding of better choices, better teeth and the knowledge to hopefully have a much healthier lifestyle. Good for you. I'm just glad I'M not alone! :)

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B.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

J.,

I totally feel the same way you do! The only problem is that since my son turned four (he's five now), he want *what he wants*, so I don't have as much control over what he eats outside of the house. I only buy healthy stuff, so I, too, don't "ban" sweets. We seem to have similar philosophies concerning other aspects of child-rearing, as well. :)

B.

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P.R.

answers from Santa Barbara on

It is nice to see so many people who are concerned about sweets. My daughter had her first bite of chocolate at a year old, only because my cousin stuffed a mouthful of pie in her mouth at Thanksgiving. But I continued to be very careful about sweets, which were RARELY given before she turned two (her first candy was at her second Halloween) and offered fresh fruit constantly to try to stave off sweets. Once she got close to three we started relaxing our standards a little bit, and unfortunately we've been staying with my mother-in-law for the past 5 months, and she has WAY too many sweets in the house. :( But my daughter still loves fresh fruit and a variety of veggies (maybe not as many veggies as I'd like, but that'll come), and I'm confident we'll get back on track when we get back out on our own. My philosophy is to let them eat some sweets, because they will be exposed. There are some kids who simply never develop a taste for sweets, but many more will and if you don't teach them to moderate they will hoard. I believe in home-baked goods, nothing too processed, and good dark chocolate when it's given rather than the sickly-sweet Nestles and such. Those super-sweet "chocolates" make you simply crave more and you eat more to get satisfied, whereas good dark chocolate has a stronger taste, less fat, and you feel more satisfied just eating a bit. Let's help this next generation break the bad sugar habits so many of us developed as kids and are constantly battling with now (or at least I am!)

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K.J.

answers from Los Angeles on

I don't allow my children to drink soda, (except extremely special occasions) and I limit their intake of juice as well. When they do drink juice it's diluted. I promote water all the time and encourage milk of course. As for the candy, I allow my children to have lollipops when they are on long shopping trips with me and have to sit in the cart for a while. I brush their teeth twice daily. I also pick carefully what times of day they can have sweets and don't allow an excess of sweets on any given day. Regardless of whether it's lollipops, cake, cookies, ice cream, potato chips - it's all junk food as a whole and not good for my children. So it all gets used in moderation for the entire family. I try to replace these items with alternatives that the kids get just as excited about but are healthy choices.

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E.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

J., you and I are very similar, I also have a 3 year old, I'm 37 and my child had toricollis, I wore her in a sling until she was 2. I also do not agree with giving children Soda, my daughter had her first drink of juice, cranberry at 3 and she has never had soda. We love ice cream so as a treat we will go out to 31 flavors for a shared scoop. I do not buy cookies, I make them from scratch on special occasions, valentine's day, st. patrick's day etc.... I think our children will realize that there is a world of soda and sweets, I want to keep her pure as much as I can. oh, and sometimes when I subject her to long shopping days and she behaves I will share peanut MM's, she loves them. Keep up the good work and it's nice to hear that there are parents that think like me.

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S.I.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi J.,

You're not the only one out there! As a general rule, we don't have candy or soda (or other junk food) in the house. If the kids get candy at a birthday party or something, I let them eat it, but if they don't eat all of it within a day or so, I throw the rest away. On Halloween, I let them eat the candy for a day or two, then throw the rest away. I try to avoid it becoming a power struggle, or the "forbidden fruit". What I've tried to teach them, right from the start, is that candy and soda (and other junk food, like McDonalds) are a "treat", and we have treats in moderation, not as part of our daily diet. I also never use candy or sweets as a reward. I talk to my children often about nutrition and exercise and healthy habits, and explain to them that I'm thinking not only about them being healthy today, but for the rest of their lives!

I also don't let my kids watch TV, for many reasons. They are allowed to watch videos, but only on the week-ends (or sometimes when I'm totally exasperated with them and need a break!)

Because of my choices, I sometimes feel like other moms think that I'm an alien! It's definitely been harder on me, especially the tv thing. It would be so much easier to just plop them in front of the tv with candy and treats, but I just don't feel that it's right or good for them, and it's my job as a parent to do what's best for my children, even when they don't agree!

I would also add that I don't criticize or condemn other parents or try to "convert" them to my way of thinking! When my kids question or complain, I tell them that all families do things differently, and that their daddy and I do what we think is best for them

So I guess I would just say to you, good for you! Stand by your convictions and do what you think is right, regardless of what everyone else does. You will definitely be in the minority, but that's o.k. Your example will also teach your child to do what they think is right, regardless of popular opinion.

Good luck,

S.

p.s. I'm a 45 y.o. sahm to a 9 year old boy and 5 year old boy/girl twins.

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A.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

We have a story in our family called "Evan and the Candy Drawer." It is a true story and a cautionary tale about what happens when a boy whose mother doesn't believe in soda and candy finds himself in the real world.

Evan's intake of sweets was easy for his mother to control when he was 3, not so much when he was 10, and impossible when he was 13.

With two very active growing kids in the house, I keep a constant supply of high-calorie snacks in what we call "The Candy Drawer." My children have access to it all of the time and it is no big deal; they have never over-indulged, and if anything, it is their last resort for badly-needed body fuel. Well, Evan was spending the night with my son at one point when he was 11 or 12 and discovered the drawer. He waited until everyone was asleep and then gobbled-up every last thing in that drawer.

And the next time he came over, he did it again. We started hiding the candy when we knew Evan would be in our house. We had to keep coming up with better and better hiding places because Evan was getting better and better at finding it. It was really kind of funny.

My son says that every time Evan got some money in his pocket he would spend it on candy and sodas. The candy taboo in his home drove Evan to wild excess at his every opportunity to indulge.

I think that you are right to choose the path of "moderation" instead of an outright ban. Everyone has a bit of a sweet tooth, better to treat it with respect than make it into a monster.

Best wishes.

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S.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

yeah, i totally agree with the whole sweets in moderation thing, in fact i think doing anything in moderation is a good way to do things, as long as you arent allergic or intolerant to the things of course!

i have a five year old boy a two year old girl and a one month old boy.

with my older son we never gave food as a reward and we told him that soda is a grown-up drink. instead of treats we would use quarters or games as rewards. but my daughter did not go for that, so i resorted to giving her one MnM every time she went potty in the toilet, etc.

my family has a sweet tooth as well, and so i am really trying hard to moderate the sweets intake. especially since i learned that my mother and my grandparents have diabetes.

oh and another thing, i took my kids to the dentist, the first time for both of them, last December, in 2007. my son had perfectly fine healthy teeth no cavities or anything. but my daughter (who was 2) had 6 cavities and one of them was almost a root canal!! after that i made sure she brushed her teeth thoroughly and we stopped letting her have candy as often. i was so glad we took them both to the dentist, normally i didnt think that toddlers needed to go, but i just thought, hey why not? couldnt do any harm! they told me that if i had waited that her little front teeth would have rotted away.

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L.W.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi J.,
My daughter is almost 4 and has never had a soda. There really is no need for it in my opinion. We try to limit candy to holidays and birthdays. We have gotten in the bad habit of giving cookies, ice cream or candy as a reward which I've lived to regret. There are many other ways to reward your child - like a fun activity. Keep up with what you are doing as it's much healthier for your child. Don't worry if others are introducing it earlier, it doesn't mean it's the right thing to do - just their choice which of course they are entitled to, as are you.

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T.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi J., You are not the only one out there doing this. You definitely have the right idea with the moderation stuff. I believe almost anything can be OK in moderation. I have only offered my 3 yr old 7-up on a few occasions. And that has only been since they started their all natural thing. As for the candy, I do the bite off a piece and give to her. Or during holiday's when she sees it, I offer her a few trial size candy's (the fruit ones mostly) and get the rest out of sight. Its difficult b/c she has older sisters that buy their own candy sometimes and she wants it. So I make her jello with fruit on top or give her gummy bears. I do not even let my teenage girls have soda (with caffeine) in morning or night. At events, in afternoon OK. They call me a mean mom. But thats OK with me. So moderation good, excessive bad.

Good Luck,
T.

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R.P.

answers from Honolulu on

I don't give my children much soda or candy. To prevent it, I don't buy soda. My children rarely drink juice too. They mostly drink milk and water. I rarely buy candy, cookies, or chips either but everyone else gives us so it does exist in our home. My favorite is ice cream but it takes more work to "scoop" so we don't give it to them much. ;)

Moderation is the key. Maybe they can have one candy every few days. I do use them for rewards at times. Since they don't get it much it works great as a reward, I get fast results. :) The benefits is, beautiful teeth! They love their fruits and even eat their vegetables like they are eating candy. :)

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M.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

what you are doing is WONDERFUL!!!! i wish that i could say the same for my family. I grew up in a family (and so did my husband) that didn't have much knowledge or will power when it comes to eating healthy. My husband and are trying to get things back on track.

any tips on a VARIETY of healthy snacks and meals? keep in mind, my children are 7, 4, & 3. So bad habits have already formed. and they are picky.

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J.B.

answers from Las Vegas on

This is a battle that is very hard to win. If I had my way sugar would be illegal!!!! I think it's one of the most non-sesne things and why do the schools need to have so much of it in the classrooms. I use natural sweeteners like honey and agave nectar when I make cookies and sweets at home but home is the only place I can control their consumptiom of white sugar. Some days I want to live like a hermit and homeschool my kids just so their bodies have a better chance at being healthy BUT I'm not THAT obsessed about it. I just try to teach them the best I can about sugar. My oldest knows to never eat anything with artificial sweeteners or food coloring so when she buys herself a treat at the store it's usually choc raisins or choc peanuts. My other kids know that food coloring is bad but they don't completely understand that if their food is colored, then it's got food coloring. My 9 year old son won't eat anything with corn syrup in it and my 5 year old son yesterday had a chance to eat ice cream and he said he didn't want any because ice cream makes him sick. I'm glad he's in tune to how sugar makes him feel. Some moms reading this may think I'm a white sugar nazi but I'm ok with that.

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T.K.

answers from San Diego on

Hey I'm right there with you. I have a 14 yr old and a 3yr old (she has just been diagnosed with cerebral palsy, she is unable to walk and her speech is that of a 1 1/2 yr old)and I have never had my oldest on any antibiotics or had her shots or given her any junk food. My 3yr old has not had any shots and I also cook all her food and no artificial stuff and now and again she gets a cookie (all natural of course). It is hard when some of the family don't understand the effects all this crap has on our kids bodies and minds but you have to be strong. My own husband eats fast food lunches and soda, this is hard for me and now I have to allow my older daughter to make the right choices for herself. I hate having to justify my reasons all the time to family but my kids are worth it and so I agree with what you are doing! I am a 43 yr old who most of the time feels 16! hey maybe its what I eat!!!!!!

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S.F.

answers from San Diego on

My son has accidentally tasted soda (given at a restuarant when water was ordered), but didn't like it because of the fizziness. He is 4 years old and we also only eat sugar in moderation. I agree that there is not a need for children to drink soda and feel it is consumed WAY too much among today's youth. My drink choices as a child were milk or water and I do not feel there is anything wrong with those choices for my children. My son has had juice from time to time, but I am not a fan of it either and feel it is as bad as soda regarding sugar content.

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A.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

I have a 3.5yr old and 22mo old. They have never had soda or chocolate. These are the two absolute no's. We don't buy soda. I also rarely ever give them juice. They only drink water and never complain. I too don't reward them with sweets, just hugs and kisses. I do allow cookies and ice cream in moderation. My mom was diagnosed with cancer when I was pregnant with my first baby. I learned a lot about diseases. Sugar feeds diseases, thus weakening the immune system. So no, you aren't the only doing/feeling this way!

BTW- I am a home birthing, extended breastfeeding, baby wearing, cloth diapering, cosleeping, holistic (chiro,homeopathy,naturopath) mama and my kids are not vax'd! I feel as if I'm in my own world!

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T.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

You are not the only one out there! I am also a baby wearing, nursing, cosleeping mom too! Never tried cloth diapers and feel guilty I never have.

I don't see any reason to introduce children, especially young toddlers to sweets and NEVER soda! My 29 month old just had her first lollipop on Valentine's Day because a mom at a kids group we are involved with handed them out to all the kids. I didn't want to say no and make my child feel bad she was the only one not having one.

We do not have candy / soda in the house. I choose healthy snacks and food options so I don't have to worry that all she's had in a day is junk food. Every once in a while like at a group event (like Valentine's Day) doesn't bother me anymore because I know she doesn't have sugar and other junk food on a regular basis. We do splurge on occasion and get fast food french fries and share a small shake.

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A.O.

answers from San Diego on

stick to your guns! i think "kids these days" have way too much unnecessary sugar in their diets. sometimes it is hard to avoid...candy is used as rewards in schools and camps, for example. that being said, it is even more important in my opinion to refrain from a lot of candy and soda at home. i don't understand why some parents give their kids soda so often. it is sooo bad for them!! at my house a soda is a treat for a special occasion, as is candy. like you, we indulge with ice cream, cookies, etc. in moderation. you are doing your kids a favor in an obese society by teaching them how to be healthy!!

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C.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

is your child happy with not having those things or does he/she even know better? if your child is happy you are doing the right thing. Eating a lot of sugar creates cravings for even more sugar, I am sure you are saving your child from obesity later on in life. If Your happy and baby is happy then what other moms give their kids should not and does not matter. GO MOMMY!

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T.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

I am a mom of three girls 7,4,and 9 months. I do not buy soda or have very many sweets in my house and I make it very well known to friends and family that my children are never to be given these things without my permission.my playgroup has labeled me the food snob. I only give my chidren foods that are natural with no artifical sugars, colors, additives perseratives or words I can't pronounce. I usually only shop at health food stores like henrys trader joes, sprouts, barons, whole foods ect.. I feel like there are going to be enough times where junk food will be push onto my kids like school and birthday partis that I can't controll so I want
to make sure I give my kids a good start to life. the more and more I learn about healthy eating the more I understand that behavior, immunity, and basic health is all related to it. stick to your guns be stong for your child and educate yourself about food labels. you wont believe what most people are putting into their bodies and wondering why there is such a spike in heart disease and cancer.

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A.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

I absolutely agree. I do not give my children soda or candy, and yes we do the occasional ice cream, cookies, cake...on special occasions. I do my best NOT to give them junk because there is NO nutritional value and it does nothing for their health. It's no wonder we see a rise in child obesity, and adult diseases that are now common in kids...because parents are NOT realizing the value of teaching our children about healthy eating. I love this quote "Children should not and cannot be expected to make the
right choices for themselves, thus they need all of us
to help them until the day they are ready for such an
awesome responsibility...living disease free!"

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C.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

I think my rules are pretty close to yours, J..

Nothing is forbidden, but I've never buy soda anyway, and the only candy that makes it into the house is chocolate. Other sweets are usually homemade, but that's because it keeps me eating far fewer, and if I'm going to eat junk food, I insist that it be really, really good. :)

My daughter can have a bite or two of anything that's going - I think forbidding food can lead to its own problems - but food is never, ever a reward. I want her to have healthy attitudes towards food.

Her favorite 'sweet' drink is diluted orange juice.

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H.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi J.,

I agree with you; in a perfect world we would not be giving our children any soda or any candy. I never buy soda, but sometimes the kids will have some at a restaurant. I never buy candy either, but they get lots from school (just wait), family members and holidays like Easter and Halloween. My attitude has been eat it all one day and throw the rest away once they eat their fill. They usually forget about it after about 10 lollipops! The only time this doesn't work is Halloween. My kids feel very territorial about their halloween candy. As a result I usually encourage them to eat it all up really quickly.

So no, you're not the only one concerned about candy and soda. It's great that you're limiting or banning both now. Unless you home-school it will probably get harder and harder to enforce good eating habits as your child gets older. The junk is just so prevalent in our society. It can still be done and it's worth trying, but sometimes it's an uphill battle!

H.

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C.T.

answers from Los Angeles on

I have a two and a half year old son and I also very rarely give him candy or sweet. I have problems with sugar myself, so I don't eat it and neither does my husband. Sugar is horrible for your health, in my opinion, and there is no reason to eat it as it doesn't supply any nutrient that we need, and can lead to diabetes and a host of other health problems. Great thing is, when my son has had candy or sweets (Christmas, birthday parties), he didn't really like it that much. So don't worry about her missing anything!

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J.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I have never given my daughter soda, and she rarely has sweets, mainly just at holiday and birthday parties. Many of my friends do the same. It's been a real eye-opener for me, going through all the various holidays with a toddler and realizing how many holidays are celebrated with candy! I think it's great that you are so aware of what you give to your son.

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D.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi J., Though I am 56, I do stay active in the wellbeing of my grandkids, and practice the same as I did with my two daughters. No soda, at all. Very poisoning to the system. No question, stay away. The cookies in moderation, but you make them. Do not buy store bought as they are now being made with GMO ingredents that are also destructive to the internal system. We are changing the way foods are made and how foods grow. Each year, the problems are getting worse. You sound like you are a great mom and I applaude you for standing your ground on how you feed your children. Our future is our children, and the more we stay away from the FDA and new foods introduced into our homes, the better we will be. Read about CCD. Colony Collapse of the Honey Bees. Keep up the great work. Amy

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B.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

I agree I think soda and candy are not needed!!!!!

I have a question my o.b told me that I will be getting a cerclage my next pregnancy at about 12 wks. Did it hurt? and how did it work out for you?

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M.A.

answers from San Diego on

I have a 15yr old son who rarely eats/drinks junk with a lot of sugar. When he was little he was allowed to drink soda when we went out to eat (rare) but it was from our cups. As far as candy, cereals he never really had much except on occasions like a friends house, halloween etc. My son's choices of foods are LOTS of fruit and water. He craves juice once in a while and has soda but overall he prefers all the healthy foods. I don't think having sugar is bad - kids just have to be taught that it's something you have in moderation. Kudos to you for caring so much about what goes into your childs body. :)

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S.Z.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hooray for you and your son! What you are doing seems completely normal (and loving) to me. My four year old thinks it's normal too. She's said, "Mommy some kids (who had candy & soda type drinks) aren't getting good food, I don't know why". She pointed out to me that they didn't even have dates (her "candy") to eat (the horrors!). She felt so badly for them! It's pretty heartening to see this reaction but I really encourage her to just be thankful she does have yummy food that is good for her too body too. Keep up the good work mama, your child will feel good and thank you :)

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M.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi, I see that you've already gotten alot of responses so I'll try to be quick.

My little guys only 5 months old, but, I hope to do what you doing. I have a big sweet-tooth too, but, hope to only pass along a moderate taste for sweets (I.E. an occasional ice cream) to my lovebug. I think 3 is too young for soda & as far as candy go's I'd say even @ Halloween giving a piece here & there & then getting rid of the rest of it (my cousin gives her's to a friend of ours who owns a business), is good.

Just to quickly add; I worked for a vending company & was shocked to see people open up full packages of treats, including hot cheetos, & giving the whole pack to children 2 & up. Before I get any heckles, I made a point to keep healthy treats in all my machines for those that wanted them.

Also, kudos for not using food treats as rewards!! I think rewarding with food says bad future eating habits all over it.

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L.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi. I have 5 and 3 year old sons and, like you, have never kept soda in the house. In fact I never accustomed them to having juice either. Water is their beverage of choice. HOWEVER, I must say that it is increasingly difficult and unrealistic to keep my 5 year old away from such things. Birthday parties and holiday gift bags filled with junk are the order of the day. Heck, everytime a fellow classmate has a birthday, which is almost every week, cupcakes or donuts are distributed to the class! While, I prefer to hand out choc-covered strawberries, I can't expect everyone to follow suit. The bottom line is that my sons know those things are not the norm at our house and should only be eaten on special occasions. I think they get that and it should serve them well in the long run.
L.

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H.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

I am a soon-to-be-49, stay-home-Mom and have a 14 year old daughter and a 16 year old son.

Unfortunately, as soon as your kids start going to school and they see what all the other kids are bringing to school for snack or lunch, it gets very difficult to maintain healthy eating habits. I'm not saying it can't be done, but just be prepared! Whenever you can, have conversations about why it's good to eat certain foods and bad to eat others.

Schools really get into teaching why it's bad to smoke, drink excessively and do drugs and I think after so many years of hearing about that really turned my kids off to the idea of doing those things (so far). Schools really need to get into discussions about food and maybe even limiting what kids can bring for lunch, although that would be impossible to monitor in middle school and high school.

My daughter became a vegetarian last summer and is very consciuos about eating healthy food, but still eats sweets here and there. My son is a total junk food hound and it's a good day when I can get him to eat two bites of banana! He only cares about what tastes good now and isn't thinking about his health, down the road. All I can do is try to sneak in healthier versions of what he likes and hope he'll eventually realize it's important to take charge of what you put into your body. It's true what they say, kids in the same family can be so different!

I have been eating healthier and excerising more, since 2002 but that doesn't seem to have had an effect on my son's eating habits. Some of his friends are vegetarian or are conscious about eating healthy, so it also doesn't appear to be a case of him trying to be like his friends and doing what they do. For him, I think it's a matter of instant gratification and laziness (eating whatever is most available or easiest and not wanting to take the time to try something new or to be open-minded about something new). My daughter, I think was affected by her peers. A lot of them are vegetarian and brought up issues that she researched on the computer. She developed her own opinions and then made decisions about them. I have learned that, after a certain age, you can't make people eat or do anything. They have to decide themselves. Even my 90 year old father could never be convinced to give up his nightly snack of Diet Coke and Cheetos.

Good luck to all who read this and watch out for High Fructose Corn Syrup!

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A.O.

answers from Reno on

Well, I think you have the right idea not to BAN sweets. I do, however, let my daughter have the occassional candy--usually around a holiday--and I let her take a sip of soda occassionally too. I try very hard not to drink soda, but I slip up a lot, so I can't expect her not to want any. I just explain to her that it is not good for us and I let her have a sip and then I get rid of it myself. It really has helped me curb my soda addiction. I used to use diet soda as a way to avoid sweets, but now I am trying to wean myself from that unhealthy habit too. I didn't drink any when I was pregnant or nursing, so why should I now? Anyway, I just think that if I make it all so TABOO that she will want it more as she grows up, but if I foster a healthy understanding about what is good and what is bad for her, she will learn about moderation and how to have some self-control. Really, it's all up to the values you want to instill. Just do what you think is best for your child! :-)

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G.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

keep at it. we were right where you are at the same age. unfortunately by the time my daughter started having more contact with kids (say pre-k, playdates, etc.) it started to change. sodas are still a no-no but sometimes when we go out to a restaurant they can't believe i'll let them have some. but then it's water after that. also a tiny bit of candy but not the kind that sticks to their teeth - usually just chocolate. and we do talk with them (now have 2) about why (diabetes, obesity, health, teeth) so they feel pretty aware now at 7 and 9. good luck. my daughter thought a granola bar was a candy bar until she was 5!

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K.P.

answers from Las Vegas on

Hi J. - my 6 month old has torticollis as well. I am seeing a physical therapist for it. Any tips or advice? Not sure how this works in reaching me back, so my email is ____@____.com

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H.S.

answers from San Diego on

I had my children believing that candy was yucky until they started school. Soda is still not something I ever have in the house. I think my 11 year old has had soda about 5 times before and he has never been real fond of it at all (he likes green tea a lot though). All four of my children like fruit better than candy.
I chose to raise my family with an awareness of what too much sugar in their diets could do to their overall health. I grew up in a huge southern family who all suffer from diabetes and weight problems. My family of 6 is the only one out of my 128 extended family members that have zero health problems so far (knock wood). I beleive that cutting out the enourmous amounts of sugar and caffine has kept my family safe and I commend all of the other parents who have gone the same route, it is not as easy as it sounds.

Bless you and yours,
H. Stanley

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T.D.

answers from San Diego on

J., I am right there with you. I do not like to give my kids candy or soda. Once in a while is fine. I feel what my kids have not tried won't hurt them. If they have not been exposed to soda, there really is no need to go there. They are not missing something they have not tried. I have a three year old son and a five year old girl. I have set it up that there is a difference between treats and snacks. And they know what that means. It works out great in my home. Also, I am not real big on hard candy's and rather give my kids things like M&M's and chocolate covered raisins if they want treats.

Hope this helps?

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S.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

You are so right. Our 3 year old daughter has no interest in soda at all, but does like the occasional piece of candy- Halloween & Valentines were overload. She drinks milk, water, watered down lemonade and sometimes a bit of juice added to the water.
Something else that a lot of parents give their kids is FRUIT SNACKS, they are awful. They have no fruit and aren't a snack, but a dessert! Our dentist friend said they are the worst thing to give your kids, besides soda in a baby bottle (GROSS)!!

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M.O.

answers from Honolulu on

Hi J.,
I totally agree with you!
I have raised four lovely children, the youngest of which is now 14. My three oldest never saw a soda or candy per se, until maybe age 5 or 6(at school of course!).It was a great experience to see them not crave or beg for it, or have the side effects of the sugary high-low. Other people did give me flack, they acted like I was "depriving" my children of some element neccesary for childhood-bah!
Healthier kids and more balanced relationships are the boon of less sugar. Now all schools(in Hawaii) have banned sweets and high fat foods on campus! Diabetes and obesity is out of control in our country, I think you are doing the right thing for your kids. AND...later as they get older they can decide if its so great after all.
My youngest got spoiled by an Auntie with treats at a young age and still has a sugar addiction. I notice the difference in uneven temperment and unhealthy food choices with her. Anyway hope my little story helps you stay firm.

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L.M.

answers from Las Vegas on

hi J.!

i think it is great what you are doing, but i truly believe that you are the one who knows the best way for your family to go about it. i rarely give my kids soda, but we do eat candy. we don't go crazy, but we've taught them to eat healthy and make good food choices. we have also taught them to be very active and to be diligent about teeth brushing and flossing. we all drink tons of water and the juice we make to bake with. no cavities!!

a little about me:

i am a 39 yo mother of a spunky almost 5 yo girl and a rambunctious 3 1/2 yo boy. we are ap, co-sleeping, extended breastfeeding (until 3), organic, athletic, hang out with our kids kind of family.

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J.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Alot of good answers,but I thought I'd add,its unbelievable what soda can do to a childs teeth. I saw this cute little girl once at my friends house. she was babysittng,for the day. All the little girls front teeth were literaly rotted!I asked my friend what happened ? and she told me, that the girls mom was constantly giving her soda,and even put it in her bottle when she still had that!! Natural juice Mommys! Thats the only way to go!

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R.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

wow! You are awesome! I think you are doing great. I have a two year boy. I don't give him soda either. And he hasn't eaten much candy. Very little. We don't ban sweets either. But we don't encourage it either. And he doesn't seem to be affected. He eats when we offer. But doesn't care if he doesn't have any. He likes fruit. I'm really pleased. And very little juice. He loves water. And we give him 100% apple juice. And we have been using the cloth diapers too! Co sleepin', nursin', Mama here too! So bravo to you! R.

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A.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

I applaude you! I too have a 3 year old boy who has never had soda and only an occasional piece of candy and limited sweets and when given juice, it's VERY diluted. You are NOT crazy in your ways. You are being a caring and responsible parent who is teaching your son good nutrition, healthy living and diabetes and tooth decay prevention. I hope there are more moms out there doing this- we need them! Your son will thank you later. Keep up the good work.
It may sound like I'm a bit passionate about this subject and I AM. That's because I'm a "retired" dental hygienist. I'd like to 'Thank You' for your contribution to dental disease prevention.
P.S. I'm a 42 year old sahm who was on strict bed rest my entire pregnancy too (for a blood clot behind my placenta). I'm glad we made it through and we have our "little miracles" to love!!!

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J.T.

answers from Las Vegas on

Hi J.,
You are not alone. I will not give my children soda. It is terrible for anyone whether it is diet or regular soda. There are many reasons why, to say the least it does terrible things to our bodies and our immune systems. Sugar in general is toxic to the body. I try very hard to not give any candy either. They do however go to school and get treats there occassionally. But I limit it at home as much as possible. My kids are so much healthier because of it too. So many kids are addicted to soda and sugar in general today and they are always sick and/or hyper because of it. Keep up the good work. A little about me: I am a 33 year mom of 3 (also used to be a school teacher) who loves being a stay at home Mom. I own my own home based business selling all natural non-toxic cleaning products, the best vitamins on the market as well as weight loss items and air purification systems.

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A.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

We wash our face, hands, hair and nails with soap and water. Yet we let the media convince us and our children that we should wash our heart, lungs, liver, kidneys and pancreas, with energy drinks, soda, ice tea and fruit drinks and coffee.
Our kids are over-weight, sick more often and have many more serious diseases than ever before in history. Diabetes should not be normal in a twelve year old. Cancer, asthma, and obesity should not be normal in children under five. Children under five are not depressed no matter what the social worker, or child psychologist suggests. I never heard a two year old discussing his mood with friends. Imagine a couple toddlers sitting around complaining to friends saying something like:

“Man, I’m having a bad day. My bottle is empty, I have a load in my pants, my mom went to the store and I can’t find my new box of Huggies. Do you have any Valium?”

It just doesn’t happen.

One of the fastest growing segments of our population being introduced to anti-depressant drugs are children under five. This same segment is not taught to eat well, play hard, and drink water. Couldn’t it be this simple? Why don’t we try water and some fresh vegetables and exercise before drugging our kids into oblivion with drugs provided by an educational system gone mad? I think we need to take more interest in what is happening in our children’s lives. I think we need to rebuild family structure and integrity. We need to take back responsibility for our own health and that of our kids. Our children are not possessions like our car or our lawn mower. When something is wrong we can’t just drop them off at the child service station for repair. We need to examine what we did or are doing to cause or exacerbate the problem. We have to stop taking our kids to other people to fix them. To prevent most major problems first try good food, water, exercise, love and a chance at a good education. Eliminate some of the poisons we put into their mouths. When a large percent of what they eat is junk food, we are doing something wrong. We have allowed their lives, their health, and their education to get out of balance.

The equations are simple: Two boxes of donuts and one book = no balance. Four hours of computer games, television, a pizza with two sodas and no physical activity = no balance.

We have lost sight of the fact that this body our children walk around in is the only one they get in this life. The sad fact is we are probably the first generation in history that will leave our children worse off than we were. We will also be the first generation to watch more and more of our children die before we do. And raising money for all the “walks for the cure” on the planet has not changed this. The health crisis is growing and our children are the worse off because of it. We need to celebrate good health. We need to fund wellness programs, before diseases occur. We need to embrace prevention.

The first order of business in this fight is to force our politicians out of the drug business, and get them out of pockets of large corporate lobbyists. In the U.S today, with a “say no to drugs” policy, we “drug” four and five year olds with highly addictive prescriptions everyday. We say it is for their own good, but who benefits? The only drugs they tell us to say no to are Crack, Cocaine and Heroin. Nicotine is one the most addictive and deadly drugs, yet it is legal and kills eight times as many people as all three of the illegal substances combined.

“Tylenol poisoning” is a significant cause of liver death in the U.S. How many of our children take it on a regular basis? It is time for us to wake up. Fitness in children isn’t optional. It is vitally important for their health and for their ability to sustain that health for years to come. We have proof beyond a shadow of a doubt that drug interventions are dangerous to say the least. Drugs are not staples of life. Yet, food, air, water, sunshine, exercise, and rest are vital. None of these has a toxicology report attached to them. It is past time we started thinking about that.

I hope you take a look and make the decision for you and your children to live longer healthier lives through education, exercise and common sense applications.

Did you know?

1] The leading cause of death among children three to thirteen years of age is cancer – and cancer loves sugar according to medical research.

2] The average can of soda has over ten tea spoons of sugar in it.

3] Ingesting too much sugar can affect mood, focus, attention span and hyper-activity.

4] Type two Diabetes is epidemic in children eleven years of age through sixteen. (It is preventable.)

Remember...
“An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”

Check it out... www.xooma.ca

Theres nothing else on the planet like it!

e-mail me for more info...Thank you!

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A.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

hi J.- i'm totally with you. i have a 2 year old son who has never had candy or soda and i don't plan on ever intentionally giving them to him. i know he will be exposed to these things eventually- but i want him to have the smarts and taste buds to recognize the difference between real food and junk food. i made all of his baby food from scratch and still make all of the food that he eats that isn't fresh. we also have a sweet tooth family- and he is also allowed 'treats' in small amounts... i think raising a nutritiously fed child is a gift to our children in a culture filled with the commercial and marketing lure of sugar. :-).

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D.M.

answers from Lawrence on

hello, I just wanted you to know that I have a 2 year old son and I do not give him soda either. He has a couple of bites of candy here and there but that's it. I don't think that small children need soda or candy. It's bad enough for adults and soda takes calcium away from your bones. I think what you are doing is wonderful. Not only does my son not need it but I want to teach him good eating habbits and I don't want him to have to struggle with his weight like I struggle with mine.

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L.N.

answers from Honolulu on

Stick to your instincts about what is right for your son. There is no need for sugary candy and empty calorie soda. And in a country with exploding obesiety in children as young as 10 months, there is more than enough science to back up your gut feeling. Just because everyone else has caved to unhealty habits, doesn't mean you have to feel pressured into doing it. I also was under pressure being the only vegetarian, "full term" nursing, co-sleeping, low-sugar, non-vacination, cloth diaper, delayed introduction of alergenic food mama at a parent participating pre-school where I'd see three year olds wander in with a family size bag of M&Ms, and chugging down Pepsi. Can you guess which children were the ones with behavior problems? Stick to your guns, as it were!!!

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D.M.

answers from San Diego on

YOU are awesome for your parenting choices! No you are not the only one who feels this way about sweets-- and Child Development 101 teaches that you should not use "food" (ie, candy) for rewards/punishments. I agree with you--"we" as parents just get "sucked into" societal bad habits and commercialism (Halloween candy) and so forth. Don't feel badly or guilty for making good health/nutrition choices for your family. IF MORE people thought this way, we would not have such an obesity/health crisis in this country. :o)

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M.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

I have never "banned" my kids from candy or soda. I don't feel I really can since I, myself, like the items too. In moderation has been the key as you stated. I believe most things like that is the key. I have been very greatful, also, because my kids have chosen fruit (mostly watermelon - or any kind of melon and apples), ice cream or popcicles over most candy. I I can actually keep candy in dishes around the house to nibble or have whenever without the care that it will be "raided" and eaten all at once. And I don't believe you should reward a child with candy for doing something or not doing something. I do believe in sometimes rewarding for special things or just because I just don't think you should hang it over the kid's head... do this and you get that.
I think alot of the weight issus and behavior we have now a days is partially do to the fact many people don't watch what their kids are eating or don't care whether it be not to hurt their feelings or just not interested (kind of sad but true)

It has not always been do great, I have a couple step children, one whom's mother would never let him have candy, ice cream or even certain other foods (but she would let his sister have it) because she believed it made him "crazy" and wild. He does have adhd and it was reinforced and not dealt with by her behavior and he would hoard, hide and steal candy and things. It was very hard but I can thankfully say, he is now 15 and for the past three years has been almost over board on the "health nut" stuff. More power to you and good luck!!
M.- mom to five kids ranging in ages from 16 to 3years old

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K.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

I have two boys 3 & 6, never have I permitted soda in our house. Soda is known to leach calcium from young bones. Literally stunting growth. The only candy in our house is around Halloween, why do kids need all the extra sugar, dyes and God knows what that is put into candy. Dessert around here is a natural if not organic type of treat. I'm not familiar with cerclage, torticollis or plagiocephaly but good on you for being the natural mom you are. You've given him the best start you possibly could. I too was a baby wearer, on demand nurser (2.5 years my first, 14 mos. my second), cosleeper, my children are not vaccinated and most medicine has been homeopathic. My entire family goes to the chiropractor twice a month. Both boys were born in water, the second at home. I get the "she must be crazy look" when most people hear of my births, but I've never judged a mother on her choice of birthing, it's such a personal choice. I too am a sahm, but I'm trying to reinvent myself and get back to some part time work. I feel Mothering is the most important job there is. I'll be 39 in April!!

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M.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

J.,
I'm exactly the same way. My daughter is five now and for the first two years of her life I wouldn't let her eat sugary foods and drinks. Now, she always says no thanks to candy (even chocolate), cookies, cake, even pizza. Of course there are maybe 3 to 4 sugary foods she will eat, but as you said, it's all in moderation. And then of course she loves carbs (crackers, bread, pretzels, pasta, etc.) If she wants a SINGLE marshmallow, she first must eat some fruit or vegetable. Then she can only have one treat a day. I, too, never use food as a reward or punishment and the rest of the family likes to have the occasional (ok, maybe a little more) cookie or piece of chocolate. So you're not crazy, stick to your guns. You're a great mom.
M.

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J.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

hi J.-
my daughter is 5 1/2 and still has not had soda- and is fine with it!! she knows it's not for her-- we actually don't usually drink it at home. i still cut apple juice with water too (for me also!)!! sweets are a treat and in moderation. we don't deny our kids (we also have an almost 18month old) but we are trying to teach healthy and appropriate eating habits! you are not alone!!

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R.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

I agree completly. It blows my mind that no one else even thinks about these things. My daughter is the all the moms comment on about how she eats so many fruits and veggies. Uhm duh thats because thats what she is offered. It gets a little tricky at party s. Luckily she is a small 2 and lower than the table. But we are now in the monkey see monkey do stage. GLad to know we can make it to 3. God bless you and your nutrition.

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S.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

It is a great question - my children (b/g twins 6-3/4) have had sips of soda maybe 5 times in their life. For us it is a "red light" food meaning we never eat it or drink it because it is so bad for our bodies. Your children are at a great age to start teaching them to understand why certain foods are bad for us. I am a Wellness Coordinator and my passion is educating families on how to make better food choices, read labels, etc. There are two great books: The Fruit Flies Picnic and Eat Healthy, Feel Great that I highly recommend.

Also - most families that deny their children candy/junk food will find that their children sneak it, will pig out on it when it is available, etc. I teach my children moderation ad I cannot control what they eat when I am not there. So, we talk about it is ok to have junk food every-once-in-awhile; if we eat a lot of junk today then we will cool it tomorrow. I like giving them control and watching them learn to make better choices.

If you want more info let me know. Good luck! S

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A.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

You're not the only one :) I feel the same way too, my son is 2 and he still only know water, juice and milk. There was one time he sip on my Sprite drink and he said it's spicy. I'm glad he didn't like it, and hope he keep that way when he grew up. I am myself rarely drink soda, only when I eat pizza, which is like once a month or something. I try to teach my boy eat/drink healthy and also stay active. Well, he's skinny, but he has muscle :) Still better than chunk of fat, right? BTW, I plan to keep my son out of candy as long as possible, he's too young to know candy now anyway.

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B.N.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi!your not the only one and nor are you wrong, keep up the good work by not giving your young child soda etc. It strips the bones of calcium and causes the children when older to take soda instead of water also for a young girl later on starting her period it causes so many problems,instead of eating taking a soda to diet or quicken the energy level dropping the sugar level making a big mood swing. Soda has more caffeine then coffee. having 5 girls believe me I know. God bless

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J.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

I think you are doing the right thing!!! I was an out-of-work chiropractor (by choice) when my daughter-now college age-was growing up. As I'm sure you know, once kids go to school, you lose a GREAT DEAL of dietary control. I didn't want to make her overly self-conscious about what she ate, so we tried to teach our daughter principles of healthy eating and encouraged her to make good choices (didn't always work, but we tried). However, when she was little (before she started school) we waited as long as we could before exposing her to white sugar of ANY kind, including soda, candy,and gum of any kind (gum is terrible for the jaw joint) and then in limited amounts. Sugar depresses the immune system and the phosphoric acid (which is in soda) alters the balance of calcium in the body. To me this is especially significant in children, whose bones are not fully formed yet. It sounds like you are handling things well. You don't want to make sugar an issue ("the forbidden fruit"), and you also don't want food to become a control issue. Dessert is part of the meal, just like the main dish or salad. Keep up the good work! Sounds like you are a great mom! :>

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S.L.

answers from San Diego on

You are not alone - we also do not give in to the whole candy/soda thing. None of us in our family do & I don't buy it. I have a 7 and 5 yr old and even when they are presented with it at a bday party (or my in-laws) I have to remind them to make good choices and they usually do. Of course they partake some, but it is not all out craziness like you would think. Kids are a lot smarter than we give them credit for and if we always make decisions FOR them, how will THEY ever for themselves?! Rock on sister - sounds like you've been through a lot and you are doing awesome to do best for your little one!
Sincerely,
another alternative mom :0)

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B.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

Keep it up. You are doing a great job. I lost that battle with my husband and our son. I have put limitations on it but unfortunatly he still gets to have some soda and candy now and again. I see no reason to give these things to my children. I was raised on them and now i battle with my weight.
So stick to what you are doing. You are just fine.

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M.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hello J.
We feel the same way in our family. Our 3 kids haven't had a single soda yet (ages 5, 2 1/2 and 13 months). My 5 year old once tried at a friends birthday party and didn't like it. And because they're not used to candy they don't particularly like that either. There is enough sweet stuff they get anyway.
That said, i don't freak out when they eat a piece of cake or chocolate occasionally. And we like to go out for ice cream once in a while.
M.
(b.t.w. cloth diapers didn't work for either of our 3 kids!)

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M.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

My son is almost 8 and has never had a soda. There was one instance at a party where he accidentally had a sip of sprite thinking it was his water and he told me he hated it. He thought the carbonation felt like it was burning his mouth. I'm glad about my decision to keep soda away, because you are right... there never is a reason to drink it. Candy is another story. I never had to make an issue out of it. My son just doesn't have that sweet tooth and therefore hardly ever asks for candy. When he does, he usually gets it only because it's been so long since he's had any that I don't mind if he has some. There is nothing wrong with your decision. Keep up the good work.

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J.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

No, you are not the only one. My 6 year old does not drink soda, only water, milk, and iced rooibos mango tea (her favorite). But I also do not ban her from soda. For example, at birthday parties, when my husband (who loves coke) would have a drink, she can have a sip of hers, but not her own. But she does love candy, so she eats that in moderation. But she really didn't start eat candy until she was four or five years old. So, I think you're doing a good thing by not giving your son soda and having sweets in moderation.

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M.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi J.,
You're doing great! No, there is absoluteley no need for a child to drink soda. The truth about soda is that it is a harmful drink that we'd be better off not putting in our bodies ever. My son is 5 and has never had soday. I don't know any parents who give it to their little ones. The thing is, that as they get older, they will be exposed more and more to lots of things and it gets harder to say no to things that are all over the place, like candy and sweets. My point is that if you're doing fine without them, then just keep going with out them for as long as you can.
It sounds like you've already got a good handle on this.
Blessings,
M.

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S.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

Dear J.,

We pretty much did a lot of things you mention - cloth diapers, not much soda or sweets throughout their entire childhood; my youngest (of 3 boys is 18) and as young adults they are pretty healthy eaters on their own - don't care much for soda and only like a few sweets (no one like b-cake for example...). Sometimes its hard to find other moms who have the same ideas. The big thing is to not second guess yourself!HANG IN there!!

S.

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N.A.

answers from Honolulu on

I have 2 children as well, ages 8 and 6. The only time my daughter had soda was when she had an upset stomach and I gave her sprite and crackers. Other than that, they have not been offered it and nor do they ask for it. As for the candy, my house never has a steady supply. The only time that there is candy in the house is right after Halloween. The kids are able to trick-or-treat, but they are only able to take out 20 pieces for themselves and the rest goes to my workplace for everyone else. This has been my rule from their first Halloween and I plan to stick with it until they become older and understand the importance of taking care of their teeth. I am so afraid of them having cavities and tooth decay. Hope you do not feel as if you are the only one who puts restrictions on sugars and goodies.

About me:
I am a 27 year old single mother that lives in Hawaii. I recently received my Bachelors in psychology and am currently pursuing my Masters program. I hope to work with adults that suffer from severe and mental illness.

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S.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I think you're doing great - and it sounds like what most mooms I know are doing. My 5 year old has never had soda and is a milk-addict, and my 7 year old has sprite once in a while (like at birthday parties). They really only drink water and milk and are fine with it. As for candy and sweets, I think that kids are offered these way too often (at school, at parties and for just about any reason). My kids get one treat if they finish their dinner - and the treat is usually one Trader Joe's cookie. Treats should be treats, and not something they get several times a day. We are training our kids how to eat as adults. I am strict at home, but if they are out and offered something I let them have it.

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J.H.

answers from San Diego on

From one J. to another, hi! I'm with you (also in the alternative side as well) on the candy/soda thing. We never gave our son (also 3) candy or soda, until he was at his daycare and hanging with his cousins. We don't really have it at home, but know that it's a part of some friend's & family's households. I'm thankful that his (now) preschool also limits candy and you really only see it during the holidays. He's only had a sip or two of soda (yeah, thanks grandma!) and I don't plan on him drinking it. After having to lose the last 40 pounds after my first son was born, I know the sugar is what held me back in losing weight for so long. I'm not hard-lined about it (god knows I induldge myself from time to time...ick, I just bought peeps for myself!), I mostly have a preference not to have that in our house for his health as well as the rest of ours. You're doing great and you're not alone.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
J. Hibbits
District Manager & Independent Arbonne Consultant
###-###-#### cell
Working with Arbonne to enhance the lives of women and their families.

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L.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

You are not alone. I have a 5 year old goping to be 6 in March. He has had a sip of soda and doesn't have any interest in it at all. I don't think children should have soda, but his cousins started drinking soda from practically infancy and now they are addicted to it. They drink 7-up and other soft drinks and beacuse of the amounts of sugar in one drink they get out of control and one of my nieces is already overweight due to her choices of candy, soda and other things they allow. These should only be done in moderation and I am right there with you. Keep a stong hold on your feelings about junk foods the more healthy habits you can teach your children the better. I am a 38 year old, currently SAHM and have been since last January- soon to be going back to work, since we just moved from Reno, NV to be closer to our family and to save money on the cost of daycare so I can work and actually bring $$$ home and not to a stranger's bank account! LOL. Stick to your guns about junk food/sodas. Your child will not be missing out and there will be lots of birthday parties that they can have the junk at, believe me!!

L. R

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M.F.

answers from Las Vegas on

Hi J., you know I never really thought about it too much before, but recently I had an opportunity to help a mother of one girl and let them stay at our house. This child was noticably a sugarholic. She would not drink water, milk, tea. Only soda or juice. She only wanted foods that were sugary. I would make eggs for breakfast and she wanted cereal or donuts.
I very rarely gave my daughter candy and I would always keep sugar free fruit snacks around. Now that my daughter is almost 6 she does not really care about sweets too much. She would rather have milk to drink and occasionaly a donut. For example we still have a huge box of valentine's candy she got from her friends at school. I dont think there is anything wrong with NOT giving your child sugary sweets. You are doing the right thing.

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T.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

I think how you handle sweets and soda is great. We did the same and now if my 6 year old tastes soda he spits it out. Both of my kids now have an adversion to it because we never let them have it. Candy is reserved for special occasions or special outings and the two share a single serving bag or each have a lollipop. We even have gone the extra mile and limited "sugar" cereals for their birthdays only. My parents on the other hand put soda in my bottles as a toddler and fed me candy whenever I asked for it. My teeth have paid for their mistake severely. There is NO reason kids should be given soda or anything else of the sort, but that's a decision for the individual parents. I think you're on the right path because I am on the same one!!

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M.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hip, Hip, Hooray!!! Good for you!!!! I'm so proud of you!! Stand firm and consistent. What you are doing is just what is recommended by nutritionists. You may like some of the resources available to you (and everyone) through the USDA online. Check out the website: http://www.mypyramid.gov/index.html

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A.T.

answers from Honolulu on

hi there J.,
i have to say im proud of you!it is indeed hard to go against the norm,but it is whats best for the child.i give my daughter some sweets (15 1/2 months old) but only when we eat them. they don't need sugar,and the sooner the are introduced to it the more likely you are to be dealing with addiction to it aka temper tantrums in order to get it.i firmly believe that treats should not be given as a reward,as it gives the impression that unless they do what you say you will withhold something they really want.plus,as food is a necessity,it should never be used as a bargaining tool,they need it and you never want them to feel that their needs wont be met if they do something naughty.that said,im sure there will be times where that has to happen or your sanity will suffer.but the key is to make that the exception not the norm.
good luck!and yes,there are others of us out there:)
A. sahm of my first daughter

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J.W.

answers from Los Angeles on

Dear J.
Sometimes I think we're the only ones who limit sugar and my children are almost certain we are! For some reason I'm still amazed when I see children drinking a huge soda with a meal then having dessert on top of that! I cut sugar in baking recipes and often substitute maple syrup or honey--and it's not like these aren't sweet! My chidlren have soda once or twice a year and are told no to sweet requests when they've already had something. Holiday candies live in a bag and they get to get something out of their candy bag when on occasion--and it's special and fun. Most Halloween candy gets thrown out. They're all used to this (age range 16 to 6 with a 10 in between) and truly most of the time they don't grumble. After reading Sugar Blues (ages ago!) and seeing what sugar does to my own body and moods, I can't just give my children all they care to eat--or all their friends' parents give their friends! Love, Jaya

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C.C.

answers from San Diego on

I am a strong advocate of whole foods, low sugar consumption, and natural alternatives as well. As for soda, there is evidence that high consumption of sodas is contributing to a rise in Parkinsons Disease. Our bodies need the foods and liquids it can recognize and assimilate so you are definitely on the right track. If you want some health alternatives to sweet treats try Agave Syrup and Stevia, both natural, sweeter than sugar (Agave is low glycemic and Stevia is 100x more sweet than sugar).

About me:

I have a background in nutrition (self-taught) and now represent a company that provides health and wellnes products internationally, all pure, safe, and beneficial. We have fabulous products for babies that help promote healthy skin and is natural and free of dyes and chemicals.

I am also the author of "Diamond Moms, A Mother's Guide to Raising a Baseball Player" ... available on Amazon. It's theme is parenting but also educates mothers about the sport.

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S.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hello J.
I do not buy candy or soda for my household. These items are packed with sugar and no nutritional value. My daughter would have soda at outings and candy on special occasions-Easter, Christmas etc. I am proud to say that my daughter is 19 years old and has had only one cavity. This cavity was so small, that it did not require Novacaine. I think restricting soda and candy is a good thing for your child to be healthy, to minimize hyperactivity and to have promote healthy teeth.

S.

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R.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi - I have a four and a half year old and she's never had soda. Why would she? We only started giving her juice after we started the birthday party circuit and juice was served there. She actually prefers water to juice when I offer her a choice. She does have a sweet tooth and we allow ice cream but try to stay away from candy, and we try to do sorbets with fruit and definitely no chocolate. We try to push fruit for dessert as much as possible, and she loves it. She's also big on yogurt and yogurt drinks as dessert or snacks.

Good on ya for the baby wearing and cosleeping - if it works for you, attachment parenting yields a lot of rewards.

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K.Y.

answers from Los Angeles on

I also don't think kids (or anyone for that matter!) should drink soda. I had high aspirations or never giving my child sugar or "junk food" but have found that you can't control grandparents and other family! My son (24 months) has had the occasional sucker or cookies/chips but not usually at home so it's not the norm because we don't have it in the house. I think kids will develop healthy eating habits if that is what they are exposed to. But I have had to learn that I can't be overly strict when we are with friends and family and just "go with the flow". I am also still nursing and prefer "alternative medicine" approaches. While I agree with your aproach, others might not so you need to do what feels right for you and your son :-)

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A.J.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi J.!
I just got back from USANA convention and Dr Christine Wood (google her, she's great!) gave us these facts: girls who consume carbonated drinks are 3 times more likely to have fractures in their lifetime, children who supplement with calcium are less likely to have fractures (this studyt was published in a medical journal), a 12 ounce soda contains 10 teaspoons of sugar. Of course diet sodas contain articifical sweetners that you woldn't want to expose you child to either. As far as candy is concerned, it causes cavities! My dad and uncle are both dentists and they assure me this is true. If you're going to give your child candy, have him or her brush teeth afterwards, and as soon as he/she is old enough to brush w/o swallowing, switch to flouride toothpaste for after sweets. I know that flouride is said to be bad for you, but it is the only way to prevent and reverse tooth decay, so I'm planning to use it on my 6 month old when he's old enough. I don't want him to have problems with his teeth when he gets older - his 7 y/o brother has 8 cavities and a crown already. Any way, good luck, if you have any questions my email is ____@____.com

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J.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I totally agree with you and absolutely never give my 2-year-old daughter soda or candy and only very rarely does she try juice, which she doesn't even like! She gets ice cream or cookies on special occasions, so we don't try to be super limiting, but we don't think it's necessary to give children soda and candy.

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M.C.

answers from Honolulu on

My kids have never had soda and I give them one piece of candy a day after they complete their chores. They receive candy from various birthday parties, holiday goodie bags from preschool and friends and so I put it in a bucket and they get to choose one tootsie roll or mini snickers after they are done their list. There is too much candy floating around to never give them any, but this way I can control how much they get.

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A.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I am a 43 year old, still teaching, single, mom of a 4 1/2 year old who is starting to have an occasional root beer when out to dinner. Candy will be passed out as 'Goodie Bags' at parties. I let her have some, but I don't keep candy or soda in the house. You should do what you want, regardless of what other moms are doing.

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A.C.

answers from Lincoln on

i'm right there with you! my 3 year old boy and 4 year old girl both think candy only comes out once a year for halloween! we, like you, do have cookies or cake, etc... occasionally (because i make it at home) sure sometimes there's a lot of sugar in it, but at least it doesn't have all the other preservatives and such. for sweet stuff our kids eat a lot of fruit.

same thing for soda, when we go to a restaurant it never even occurs to them that they would get soda. it's only milk or water. the other day i decided as a very special treat to give them sprite. i hadn't told them and since it's clear they didn't think about it, but when they took a sip they were both like "what's wrong with the water?" they ended up liking it, but haven't asked for it since.

i never thought i would end up being this 'kind of mom' but it's just worked out best to not even get started down that muddy road i think. i don't think it's going to make them 'candy freaks' later on, primarily because we do have dessert a couple nights a week and we don't make a big deal out of it. (for example when they ask for candy in the aisle at the grocery store, we just say 'sorry, not today' not "NO, candy is of the DEVIL!" :-)

we've had friends offer them a piece of candy and we usually say ok. i'm sure there will be a time when we decide for some reason to give them candy, but it won't be as a reward, it will probably be just because i buy something for my husband and want to include them. (there was one time when we took a "family trip" to the Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory and everyone got ONE piece of chocolate, neither one of them even finished theirs, it's just too sweet to them.)

best of luck and keep up the good work!

A.

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L.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

In theory, I'm with you. When we only had one child, it was easy to do. At age 3, I don't think he had ever tasted chocolate and had rarely had any other kind of candy. Unfortunately I can't say the same for #4. He knows and loves the stuff all too well. The only soda any of our children drink is if we go to a party and it is being served. Then, it is only allowed if it has no caffein. We need to be more vigilent in the candy, but I'll tell you, as your child goes out into the world, it will get harder and harder. Sweets are EVERYWHERE. I sincerely wish you much success. Your child's health will be the reward.
L.

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B.W.

answers from Reno on

I have a 2 1/2 year old that has not been given any soda. She does get candy occasionally. I agree that it seems like there are a lot of families out there that do not see a problem with giving soda to very small children. We haven't decided at what point she will be allowed to drink soda, but know that it is not right now, and probably won't be for a couple more years. Since she doesn't know what soda tastes like, she doesn't ask for it. When she wants something sweet to drink she asks for juice.

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M.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

my son will be 2 in may and doesn't eat any candy, though he does eat sweets like sweet bread, cookies, and cake. his favorite thing to eat is spinach and broccoli and he loves salad so i don't feel bad at all allowing him to eat sweets once or twice a week. i also cook dishes like arroz con leche (sweet rice & milk) which isn't unhealthy but its sweet.

i think its good practice to not inundate your kids with sweets.

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A.E.

answers from Santa Barbara on

This is to address most of the posts to this subject....To be completely honest, I would have to disagree. Of course these things should be given in moderation. But to not let a child experience some of th riches of life. And yes sweets is. Don't get me wrong, I don't force all kinds of sugar and sodas down my childrens throats. What I am more worried about is the caffeine. My kids are very active (6, 9, & 10), they don't sit in front of the tv all day and I don't lock them up in the house. I too buy healthy foods. My kids love fruits and veggies. We do drink alot of water, vitamin water, natural juices. along with soda and such. I say there is nothing wrong with giving your kids treats and all the fun stuff. If you are worried about obeseity then make sure your child is active. Go to the park..take walks, stay active...period. If its cavities....its all about parental responsibilty. Do you make sure your childs teeth are brushed everyday? (yes there is toothpaste you can buy for a 3 year old) If you do then there is no problem. The big problem with kids that have teeth issues and obeseity is because some parents are straight lazy. Its not directly the fault of the foods.

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M.Z.

answers from Los Angeles on

My daughter (who will be 3 in July) has not had soda, she has tasted it, because my older kids wanted to see her reaction, but she doesn't drink it and as for candy...well she has had chocolate and stuff, but like you in moderation. My oldest, 15, has a killer sweet tooth, and I don't want her to end up like that, not to mention that he drinks soda a lot when he is at his dad's house, (we are divorced but happy!) so I think you are doing the right thing, don't change for everyone else, stay true to your beliefs.

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K.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

I am lucky. My 5 year old daughter simply does not like the bubbles in soda's and only enjoys high quality candies (chocolates, red vines... not Twizzler's, etc.). We don't ban treats either. We have a "treat basket" on the counter and she knows that she can have a treat after nutrition. When she gets candy at a birthday party we throw it into the treat basket. However every two months or so I go through the basket and throw out whatever she has not chosen and most of it is the lower grade, white sugar junk candy. So I think if you start your child with good fruits, veggies and proteins when they are little, they will naturally gravitate to the "better" treats. Of course, all bets are off when they reach the teen and college years. I lived on sugar and caffeine in college.

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B.J.

answers from Los Angeles on

Dear J.~

I limit my child to candy and soda also. I don't 'ban' sweets or soda with him, but he does have it in moderation. We don't have soda in the house, and most of the time when we go out to eat, he chooses milk over soda anyway. I am very lucky that he chooses healthier alternatives on his own. He likes that he has a choice. I NEVER use candy as a reward either! Positive reinforcement is what my son loves most for making the right choices.

I think what you're doing for your son is fine, and you shouldn't worry about other moms who may feel differently about how you are raising your child. I find that other moms have such a busy schedule that candy as rewards and soda when going out is an easy alternative to having to take the time to help their child learn to make the healthier choices.

You're doing a great job!!

B.

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M.B.

answers from Reno on

My son was almost 4 years old before he had his first soda. Until he was about 6 or so, he had maybe one soda every month. Now at 12 years old, he has maybe one or two a week and only in the last 6 months or so did I let him drink sodas that contain caffeine.
My daughter is 17 months and has never had soda.
As for candy and other sweets. My son was 2 I believe and it was only at Christmas and Halloween. My daughter has had small tastes of candy (maybe a total of 3 corners of a piece of chocolate)
She has had ice cream maybe once a month in the last three months. We don't buy ice cream in general so it is a treat when we have it.
I try to limit sweets in general because of empty calories but as a treat every once in a while isn't too bad.

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B.C.

answers from San Diego on

I just joined this and saw your post- we don't drink soda at home, we like sweets but try not too have much, just for holidays, ie. valentines, alough sometimes that candy goes on forever! So we don't give soda to my 4 yr old but we don't ban sweets, it's all about moderation and what works for your family. Best of luck to you. (I'm a psychologist/life coach part-time and mom of a 4-yr old daughter.)

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J.C.

answers from San Diego on

Keep up the good work. Soda is the worst thing that anyone can drink regular or diet. Candy is not as bad but always in moderation.

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L.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Dear J.,

My son is 5 now. He actually prefers chips to sweets but we let him have some candy occassionally. He usually only eats a few pieces of candy and he's done with it (usually M&Ms). There is nothing wrong with sweets in moderation, as you've been doing. If you allow some sweets, your son won't feel like he's being deprived when he's older.

As far as soda, there is no need for kids to drink it. I made the mistake of letting my son try my coke when he was younger and now he likes to "steal" my coke when I'm drinking it. However, I only allow a few sips. I have let him have Sprite or 7 UP on a few occassions because they have no caffeine - but only as a treat in a restaurant. My son really prefers to drink Milk, Water and Lemonade and hopefully it will stay that way.

So I think you're going about things in a good way. When your son is older let him try soda and explain that if he drinks it, it should be in moderation also.

Take care!

L.

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A.T.

answers from Los Angeles on

My son is 2 1/2 and has yet to drink soda. We dont drink it so the temptation is never there. He has had a little candy and m&ms for potty training. All in moderation. He eats a very healthy and inspiring diet :)

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Z.D.

answers from Reno on

my 4 year old never has soda. i may let him have one sip of mine once a month but usually even less.

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A.S.

answers from San Diego on

If your child is not curious about having soda/candy i agree with you not to introduce these to him. He will have them eventually and the later the better.

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C.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

We do the same thing- no soda & occasional treats.

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B.F.

answers from San Diego on

i do the same thing with my 16month baby girl and every one thinks i am crazy for doing it but me and my husband think that it is best for her

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C.M.

answers from Dallas on

i think ur doin d right thing bc i'm the same way my son is 2 and i never give him soda he usually drinks milk, juice and water. If we go out to eat and they don't have those drinks i usually give him lemonade. and about candy he rarely eats it too he usually wants some if he sees us eating it so sometimes we give him a lil bit

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