K.B. asks from Saint Louis, MO on March 26, 2011
Cribs and Daycare
So due to some events, my childcare situation is having to change. My son will be having to go to daycare so that I can go to work. I found a great home daycare lady who is licensed and able to provide the hours and lots of one on one care so I'm quite excited. However, up until now, it is like pulling teeth to get my son to sleep in his crib. She mainly has cribs for him to sleep in and I am concerned about his nap times there. He is only going to be 7 weeks when he starts. So should I start to transition him to his crib? And how should I go about it? Everytime I put him down in it he starts fussing around and crying almost instantly. Even after I angled his mattress. I have noticed the past few nights from him sleeping in his bouncer and swing that sometimes he starts crying but he doesn't even wake up. It's like he's crying in his sleep. I used to assume it was cause he was hungry, but last night I simply picked him up and held him for a while and he calmed down and I was able to put him down for another 2 hours. So I don't know. It's like he's just an irregular sleeper. Any thoughts on how to make him a better sleeper? I feel like he can't self-soothe at all. AND he won't take a pacifier. I have tried for weeks now. He simply doesn't want it.
*I am planning to meet with her today and ask her about this situation, but I'm simply asking for some other suggestions or opinions on this.
So What Happened?™
I talked to her today about the crib issue and she said that they would always try a number of different things. She had a swing and a couple of bouncer/rocker options. She also said that she had a nephew who slept well on some mat that they bought for him. She agreed that he probably just doesn't feel snuggled enough in a crib right now, but she seemed very willing to work with him on this and encourage him to sleep in the crib. He is the only newborn that she has right now. The next youngest is about 8-9 months so she said all of the different things they had were an option for him. She did suggest trying to make the space he sleeps in in the crib a little more "snuggly" with positioners and stuff to see if that would help him get used to sleeping in there. Then I could transition them as he gets used to them. I think for now though we'll keep his sleeping arrangement as is and will move him into his crib whenever he's a little older and his sleep patterns are different.
More Answers
M.F. answers from Houston on March 26, 2011
She knows what she is getting herself into when she takes on a newborn. She will figure out the best way to allow him to sleep whether in the swing, holding him, etc. Its part of her job. I am assuming she doesn't have a lot of kids in her care? Most newborns, at least my own, do not know how to self sooth. He sounds really normal to me. My kids only slept in a bouncer or swing for the first months at least 5-6 months before they would sleep in crib.
1 mom found this helpful
S.M. answers from Kansas City on March 27, 2011
I agree with everyone else. She will figure things out. I also agree that we almost never put a newborn in a crib and definitely not in another room. I like to have them right with me or right with my mom so that I know exactly what's going on. One of the things we've done that worked well for us is to use a stroller. The newborns, up until about 5-6 months sleep well in them and I can wheel them with me no matter what room I am in.
Our youngest is 9 months old and even though he sleeps in a crib, there is almost always one of us with him. He was alone in my mothers room for a nap on Friday because she went out of town. I checked on him every few minutes.
I'm sure she'll do fine with him. :) OH yeah....I also agree that at his age he's not going to self soothe and PLEASE forget the pacifier. Those things are dirty and nasty.
C.B. answers from Kansas City on March 26, 2011
my experience with an in home daycare was amazing. i found that most of the time, as a first time mom, it was HER helping ME figure things out, not the other way around. she does this for a living. if you like her like you say you do, and trust her, give her some credit - this is her area of expertise. i never hesitated to ask mine for advice and she was great. a really useful tool in my parenting toolbox!
M.C. answers from Pocatello on March 26, 2011
if you can send a swing with him, maybe that is the way to go! He may be able to be "day trained" to sleep in a crib... so that he can nap there. Napping often works differently than nighttime sleeping anyways. If he wont take a pacifier that is ok... does he like to be swaddled? my daughter LOVED to be swaddled and put in a swing to nap... she also preferred a bassinet or a car-seat to her crib- I just think it was to spacious for her to feel snug and safe.
Tell the care provider about the sleep issues. If she has a decent amount of experience with infants she'll probably have plenty of good ideas... and my even say- "i know just what to do".
We used the "happiest baby on the block" techniques with our daughter... and they worked like a charm! We learned those techniques from an infant specialized daycare provider who taught a "baby care" class as part of our hospital's labor and birthing classes. I highly recommend checking out that book, or looking up the techniques online!
Other than that just relax... it'll be all ok! You are doing good, don't expect too much from your baby... it is ok if he need's "just to know your still there" at this age! You are his whole world. When he is at daycare, he'll be fine- and I bet he'll get into a happy routine there quickly!
-M.
M.S. answers from Chicago on March 26, 2011
I am a home daycare provider. I find that the newborns rarely take naps in the pack n play until they are closer to 4 or 5 months. She will figure out where he is most comfortable sleeping. Often my younger infants will nap in a bouncer in the playroom while the kids play. They are able to sleep through the noise, I am always amazed! As he gets older, he will feel more comfortable sleeping in a crib. Newborns sleep where ever they fall asleep, totally normal!
M.P. answers from Provo on March 26, 2011
He's 7 week? yeah there is NOOO way he will self sooth!!!! If this is a good daycare lady then she will be able to handle a 7 week old. 2 hours sounds right on track! Do you swaddle? Use a swing? All of these will help her sleep. I would suggest The Woombie. It still allows your baby to move but will keep from hitting his face.
S.B. answers from Chicago on March 26, 2011
You may find that he sleeps fine in another environment. My son will not sleep in his crib at home, but I don't have any trouble getting him to sleep in his cousin's crib when we go to my BIL's house. I'm sure the caretaker you've chosen will work with him, and she won't just leave him crying and not sleeping. If you want to use pacifiers, you may just need to try a different brand. We really like the MAM paci's, the shape of the nipple on it was the only one my son would take. Also, keep in mind that when they are so young they still have a strong tongue thrust reflex, and the action of sucking actually pushes the pacifier out of the mouth. It may just take him some time to get the hang of it :)
H.H. answers from Kansas City on March 28, 2011
I would mention it to her but he may actually sleep in the crib for her and she may be the one that can get him comfortable with sleeping in a crib. Different atmosphere than home and he may adjust at her house just fine. If he doesn't then she can decide to put him in the swing or a bouncer seat to sleep. I know when I worked in daycare the babies adjusted to the daycare schedule pretty quickly as it was a daily routine. Some of them slept better at daycare than at home because the parents were always making comments of wishing their babies would do the same at home. Find out her schedule and try to mirror that at home as much as possible and you will find that your baby will fall into the routine easier.
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