Court Ordered Child Support*revised*

Updated on June 03, 2007
P.J. asks from Greenfield, OH
15 answers

Ok what is the point of court ordered child support if they don't make him pay it. My kids bio dad is almost 2000.00 behind in child support and he is getting away with it. I am so upset because I am gladly raiseing our children and my boyfriend helps but he gets his visitation and doesn't pay a dime. O this is not fair. Does anyone know what I can do? Any help would be grealty appreciated. I thought I would add that he says he is not working but has a new car and is always buying things like new cell phone. So I know he is working but it is under the table.

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So What Happened?

Ok I talked to my caseworker and we are taking steps to hold him in contempt. To everyone that thinks doing something to him I would like to reply. What is in the best intrest of my children is that they can have better meals we barley get to eat good meals it is always something cheap. Dinner meals that cost $1.00 each. When my children are going with shoes that are to small because I can not afford new ones or used ones. When my son tells me mommy my socks have holes in them and I can't even afford new socks. Now I should be easy on there dad when he should be helping me with these things. I pay for childcare. I pay 100% of everything. Both are in diapers. I have to send diapers when they go see him. Why shouldn't I do something about it. Yes I agree that the children need to see there father but being a sperm donor doesn't make him a father my boyfriend helps pay for bills and food he is more of a father then there bio dad. Sorry to get so heated but for those who seem like I am in the wrong for wanting something done I think that is wrong. I thank everyone for there advice and I am going through with the legal stuff.

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M.S.

answers from Columbus on

I agree..it isn't fair. My ex pays, but he makes a lot more than it shows. He too gets to buy a new car, clothing, go out on on the weekends, etc., and the amount of support I get doesn't even cover half of what I pay a week in part time child care. He makes 3x what I do, yet I am covering 90% of the financial obligation. I personally think it's bs that a non custodial parent is still allowed visitation, yet can't contribute financially. I know most will argue that it's a parent's right, etc., but it really isn't fair that a parent can play the 'fun' parent, yet has no financial obligation at all...it goes two ways, it's not just about the emotional aspect...emotions don't feed a hungry child, keep a roof over the head, or any other neccessity. Both are needed and it took two, so no parent should be allowed to dodge an obligation. Is there anyway you can find out where he is working? Even if you have to make nice, see if he can some how find out, then take it up with CS

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W.B.

answers from Cleveland on

Been through it all! You'll spend more time in court and on the phone then you have time! My ex always either didn't have a job or quit right after the court hearings when it started coming out of his pay. They've always based his on minimum wage and he's gotta away with it all these years. They always have some excuse. My kids our now 22 and 16 but i divorced when they were 8 and 13 it hasn't changed, i never counted on it, and if and when it does come in, i use it for extra things my kids need to this day. They always had to take part of his income tax return too! Alot of times i've worked two jobs to give my kids a good home life and their other nice things but in the long run they know who cared for them so it was and is all worth it, trust me? Good luck, and be as independent as you possibly can, it's a good thing.i never took him to court to have mine revised, or cause trouble it wasn't worth it, and he hardly paid the low amount either, but once again it's that old saying, " you can't make them be a dad, or anyone can make a child, but it takes a real man to be a father!!"

Y.W.

answers from Cincinnati on

Good luck with that! My child's father is more than $7000 in debt and arrearange and they just LOWERED it because he told them he couldn't possibly pay $170 a month! He hasn't seen her since she was 3 mos. old so at least I don't have to worry about visitation but he keeps threatening it! He even admitted to the judge that he was getting paid under the table to avoid child support (he has five other children). So, keep me updated. I'm working on taking it to state level myself actually. He hasn't paid anything since November ($90).

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S.R.

answers from Toledo on

Well, I know I am on the wrong boat after reading some of the responses, but here it is. Do you know what kind of situation your x is in? One of my friend's is severly behind on support b/c of the laws. Before he could get his support lowered he had to have a steady decreas in income for 6 months and at times his child support order was for MORE than his income due to a job change. And he kept changing jobs b/c who can go to work when at the end of the week you don't even have a paycheck b/c it all went to taxes and CS? I completly agree with both parents raising and supporting their children, no argument here on that side of the issue. But, why is that people believe that if a parent doesn't pay support (weather they can or can't) then they shouldn't be allowed to see their children? I believe that in today society we always want more than we actually need, live outside of our means. I mean, what would happen if the State took my children away b/c I lost my job and needed help supporting them? Isn't that the same thing as a believing a Dad shouldn't still have visitation if he doesn't pay support? To me it is and I believe it takes a community to raise a child, Emotionally, Physically, Spiritually, Financially.

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D.M.

answers from Lima on

GOOD LUCK! What county do you live in? My sister's ex-husband was over 40k behind and they didn't do anything to him...I think they just pick and choose who they are going to persue. I'm planning on taking it to the state level for my own because of some other issues, but if we live in the same county, we can go at it together...I know several others here that have complaints about the child support situations.

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J.

answers from Cincinnati on

You have gotten very good answers before me. Do try to find out why he is not paying. Call the office and report it, the garnishment is probably the best way to go. If you stop visitation on your own you will be in contempt of court. You have to have the vistation changed by the court. Unless he is a really bad influence please don't cut off visitaion. My husband didn't see the children from his first marriage for years. We didn't realize we could take her to court for being in contempt. It had nothing to do with money. She is just a horrible person. It hurt the kids so much. They are all grown now and have all had pretty significant problems, from her parenting choices.

He is and should be responsible but push back on the courts as much as possible and try to keep your child out of the mess. It doesn't help much now but I do know from a freind of mine that once the amount gets to 14,000.00 they really come oafter them.

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K.B.

answers from Cincinnati on

As they said, call the child support office. Get the money taken right out of his pay check before he ever sees it. Then you know your getting it and when.

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K.C.

answers from Cleveland on

Well sorry to say but there is lot to do but most of it takes time and money! You can take him back to court. There is a company that goes after back child support I can not remember the name and I think he has to be behind over a certain amount but I think its 2000 so you maybe ok and im not sure if there is a fee with that my friend used it and she got great results it took like 2 months to get all paperwork in order and she had her money with in 6 weeks. Hope all goes well i have been there my kids dad would switch jobs to avoid them taking it out of his paycheck he always wanted to buy them thing and say it counted towards CS.
Now i normally do not do this but about finding work from home, I just started selling Tastefully Simple and it is GREAT i make my own hours I do a party a week and average about 150 a week and that is with about 6-8 hours a week in work and only about 4 of those are outside my home. There is a small fee to get started but with one party you can pay yourself back. But if you would like more information about Tastefully Simple we could get together and I can tell you more about it! Stay strong things will get better!

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A.K.

answers from Columbus on

To report it to CSEA and have his wages garnished, you have to know where he is working. I know my ex has income (he just bought a new truck) but without knowing where the income is coming from, child support isn't able try to get money. If it is a court order he can be held in contempt. I don't know how that affects visitation.

I think lawmakers saw many mothers use the children as leverage. And there are, unfortunately, lots who do that and they decided to change the law to benefit the children. That doesn't always work in everyones best interest though. My ex gets to be 'fun guy' while I hardly see the kids from working two jobs and upholding court ordered visitation.

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M.W.

answers from Cleveland on

Like the other women said the only thing you can do is call your case working for child support. They will suspend his license usually when he is 1600.00 behind but he only has to pay $300 to $500 to get it back and even if he's paying a little even $5 on his child support they won't do anything because he's making an "effort" I have just gone threw a long drawn out court battle with all this and now my daughters father has switched jobs AGAIN and is 1099 which basically means he pays his child support to csea it doesn't come out of his check. So I expect I won't get child support for a long time... I really hope that everything works out for you. Hope he gets what's coming to him.

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L.M.

answers from Cleveland on

Other than reporting to child support were he is working, unfortunately there isn't a whole lot you can do. I can relate to that!! They will take his license away (which doesn't make any sense to me, cuz how can they get to the job they need to pay the child support!) and then if he doesn't play catch-up they will make him serve time. One plus when they are behind, they end up paying arrearages and when tax return time comes, you will get a big sum. Just have patience and try to enjoy those kids without stressing over their father. They sense the stress and in turn ends up stressing them out too, so just have faith and be patient. All will work out one day!! Take care!
L.

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J.L.

answers from Dayton on

P.,

Sorry to hear. Unfortunatly there is not a lot that can be done.. BUT stay on top of Mont. County if that is who it is thru.. if he is I beleive it is 60 days behind with no payments at all they can suspend his drivers license, BUT i found you really have to stay on top of them.. they dont just go and do it.. My ex was over 2 months behind and i had to call them and tell them to send the order out to suspend license, and then had to call again 2 weeks later and they issued it again becuas there was no record.

I am getting support now, but not medical.. he dont make enough they said to carry medical but apparently i make enough to pay the 100.00 a week. hmmm My ex hasnt paid a dime of his share of medical bills or co pays for the 3 years we have been divorced.

As far as visitation, i have expressed to him he can have him anytime he would like, he only lives about 11 houses away (in Union) and dont have anything to do with him.

Good luck.. But call the child support place and make them do something.

Jess/Union

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S.H.

answers from Cleveland on

CALL THE COUNTY YPU LIVE IN, i KNOW THAT THERE ARE SPECIFIC OFFICES THAT HANDLE IT, TELL THEM THE ISSUE AND SEE IF YOU CAN GET HIS VISITATION REVOKED UNTIL HE PAYS, OR SEE IF YOU CAN HAVE HIS WAGES GARNISHED! THAT ALWAYS OPENS THE DEAD BEAT DADS EYES!

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S.O.

answers from Cleveland on

My best advice would be to call your case worker at the child support agency or have your lawyer do it. A friend of mine got laid off and naturally got a little behind in child support and had his children kept from him until he was able to pay again. I don't know all of the rules about this, but I would call and find out what you can do and most importantly why THEY haven't done anything to help you. If your child support goes through them before it gets to you then they know he's not paying, so I would find out why nothing is being done. I am surprised that this has gotten to 2000.00. These days they don't usually mess around about non-payers. Example: I was almost 18 when those laws went into effect and my dad was almost 18 years behind in child support. I am now 33 and my mother is STILL getting back support!

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M.G.

answers from Cleveland on

this is a big problem i have had to deal with. my x-husband was over $6000.00 behind. if he will not keep a job/or has a job inder the table,there is nothing really but suspending his driver's license. if he does work(and you know where)you can call the 1-800-860-2555(cuyahoga county) and report where he is working and they will send a wage garnishment. for all of these you have to have a case with the child support enforcement agency-they are a big help(for the most part). it is free to get child support, they carge the payer a $2.00 fee. if you do not have your case with them call the above # to get the info! best of luck-M.

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