Coping with Daugher Who Might Need Helmet

My son had torticollis and plagiocephaly also. He was 5 months old when he got his helmet. He also went into PT for his tight neck muscles. He wore the helmet for a little over 5 months. I have to admit that it was hard at first because I felt like other people were talking about him and thinking that there was something wrong with him other than the shape of his head. It did get better and it was easier to go out in public with him. I don't regret getting it for him. He is now 2 1/2 yrs old and has a perfect shaped head. I made the helmet "cute" by putting his name on it with stickers and also different theme stickers. I would change the stickers every couple weeks to keep it looking different. He was too little to know the difference but I knew. I also heard that if you have their name on it, then people might open up in public and ask you about it. Good luck and you are doing the right thing.

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Well, I never had to cope with this myself, but I did have two friends whose kids were in helmets and they do not regret the decision to do it. The one little boy was pretty severe and had torticolis(sp?) and he looks great now. I think it is something that is very beneficial for the child and the physical therapy can definately be emotional for the parents because the baby is uncomfortable for the time being, but it really helps them get ready for later infancy. I am sure your plastic surgeon can hook you up with a support group in the area to help calm those fears and be able to share your experiences with other parents who are going through that too. Hope all turns out well!

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As to the emotional thing- if you are having emotions that you can't control, you should ask your doctor to screen you for post-pardom depression and/or regular depression. Sometimes a short-term use of antidepressants can help stabilize things; there are several that are considered "safe" for breastfeeding moms, if that is a consideration. (I used Effexor when i was Breastfeeding).

My regular depression spiraled out of control during my pregnancy, so I know what you are saying. I too am a very emotional person by nature. I choose to take anti-depressants to "normalize" my out-of-proportion emotions. Not saying you should neccesarily take them long-term like me; just saying they can be helpful in getting back in control.

For the helmet thing, all I can add is that I once saw an adorable little boy in a helmet; it was decorated with all kinds of stickers; he looked like an explosion of color; and it made me smile to see him grinning at the world with this rainbow of color on his head.

hugs for you.

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One of my best friend's son had to have a helmet at the same age your daughter is. Their situation sounds almost identical to yours. He wore it for 3 months. He looked ADORABLE in it! I know, you are probably thinking, yeah right, but he did.

My friend was so worried about him keeping it on, or crying a lot with it on but he adjusted really well. I will admit that my friend had some really hard moments in public, but it was something that she got used to, and she would try to educate people on why he had to wear it and for how long.

She will tell you now that she built a lot of character those 3 months. She will also tell you that 3 months is NOTHING compared to a life of issues due to head and neck problems you baby could potentially suffer from.

He was in daycare, so they helped to take care and keep it clean--she met with them and educated them on what to do, they were very nice about it. He is now almost 2 yrs old, and his head looks FABULOUS! It really did a great job, he is more handsome than ever!

I truly think that it is harder on us parents to have to face that our children aren't picture perfect. I think that the world we live in could be a bit kinder to everyone as well. Don't feel bad if you are emotional, it is a tough thing to think about. We all want our babies to be perfect, but that just isn't the case...she always will be to you and your family! :) Try not to worry about the public...everything will work out!

Good Luck!

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Have you considered consulting a Chiropractor? I have a family member who is a chiropractor who has mentioned working with children to shape their heads when they get flat spots. I have a couple nephews who had very flat heads in the back and I remember hearing the advice to practice a massage technique that helps move the skull bones into better shape since babies still have space between their skull bones as their brains grow and develop. As long as there is not a 'problem' with your child, I would look into chiropractic - also for the most likely tight neck muscles, your babe could have some cervical malalignment with is so normal after birth and a series of adjustments could do your baby a world of good. Best of Luck!!

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A.,
Please take your little one to a licensed chiropractor. It won't help the flat spot, but it will easily fix the neck problem. Can you imagine how that must feel? I have a great one downtown if you want a recommendation - just email me.

My daughter also got a bit of a flat spot on her scull. Not terrible, but noticable on a bald person! She is 5 now. It is still there, but thankfully she is a girl with lots of hair. Be glad you caught it in time! Merry Christmas.

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I didn't read all of the responses because you have sooo many. I don't want to repeat the other mom but I would recommend a chiropractor too. My son's neck was stuck in extension, tilted toward the back. You could not curl him into the fetal position at all, he was so stiff. A couple visits to the chiropractor and he was fine. We didn't deal with a flat spot on his head, but I know our chiropractor can work with that too. Let me know if you need a recommendation. Good luck. Let us know what happens!

Hi A.,

I must admit that I'm a little shocked at how may people say she DOES NOT need a helmet.

We were torn about what to do with getting a helmet or not getting a helmet when our son was 4 months old. At first we decided to not get it, and when we went back for a recheck at 6 months the doc was shocked and disappointed that we chose not to do it. We changed our minds and got the helmet when our son was 7 months old.

The helmet is the easiest thing and the best way to get a good head shape is to do wear it between 4 and 6 months. We started @ 7 months, kept it on him until 15 months, and our son's head shape is improved but not round like his brothers. It's too late for us, and so our son will forever have a mis-shaped head.

Our son didn't mind it at all, and winter is the best time to get it cause it can help with keeping her head warm. After transition we just put it on in the morning and took it off at bathtime. One of us washed the helmet while the other washed the kids.

I don't know how to help with the emotional piece, but I do know that once you have it, you'll see the helmet is super easy and works wonders. It's much more traumatic for the parents than it is for the child, and once we saw that our son didn't care about it, then we didn't care about it either and it got easier.

Good luck and have a safe holiday!

Hello! At my DS's 2 month check-up he was referred to a PT and was diagnosed with torticollis-which is tighter neck muscles on one side, causing a flat spot. We also didn't notice it unitl the DR pointed it out. I was upset at first but PT seemed to go well and it was OK. Then we found out he may need a helmet. I was terribly upset. Especially with your first baby anything "wrong" seems tragic so I know exactly how you feel. He ended up wearing the helmet for 3 months and it didn't bother him one bit. It also made my DH and I more sensitive to people who look "different" and how innocent looks and comments can hurt. In the end, I still think he has somewhat of a flat spot, but his plagiocephaly got much better. This is where one side of the face gets pushed forward and is uneven. Please send me a message if you have any questions about the helmet, PT, etc. Good luck! This is becoming more and more common but is very curable!

I think you are over reacting and it is a good thing that the doctors want to address this early. I have a friend who's little girl wore a helmet and they didn't want her to get made fun of or anything as she got older if it didn't correct itself. We almost thought ours might need one but he started sleeping more on his side as he got a little older. I would have welcomed it if it was the best thing for him. As for the tight neck muscles, my sister has them and is fine. Just has a little limited head turning.

The cranio-cap "helmet" was the best thing that we did for my daughter. I had twin daughters 3 1/2 years ago, one needed the cap because she was the passive baby, and my other daughter who didn't need it, had the tight neck muscles. With therapy for both of them both issues resolved themselves. I know it is scary to think that there is something wrong with your baby, but this is an easy fix. I'm also a mom of a complex special needs child (Down syndrome and bipolar - he is 9 1/2), so I have been there done that, it is scary to think that there is something wrong with your baby. When you go for the cranio-cap they will also recommend physical therapy for the neck muscles. The cap was fun, we were able to decorate it anyway that we wanted to. The follow up appointments were fun, just hearing that we were doing a good job and that things are going the way it should. My daughter loved the cap so much that she wore it for the full 24 hours, and only had to have it for 4 months. I look at it this way, when she is learning to move around she has the added protection so she doesn't hurt her head. My daughter used it as a weapon with her twin so for her it was a game, she doesn't remember it. I hope this helps, if you need anything else you can email me at ____@____.com

M.
mom to Ryan (9 1/2 Down syndrome, bipolar, asthma, allergies, complex behavioral issues that we are working on)
Abbey and Alexa (3 1/2 my "normal" princesses)

A good friend's daughter wore a helmet, she is now 7 and doing great. It turns out that it can be genetic, they avoided the problem with their second daughter, but they were constantly changing the direction she was laying. Have you talked to the doctor about maybe taking your baby to the chiropractor? If it is a neck issue it could help. Good luck!

My little guy had a helmet starting at 5 months and wore it for 12 weeks. We were agonizing over it when we were advised and decided to do it so I know how you feel but in all honesty, it was no big deal at all and we are glad we did it. His head is now perfectly shaped and the physical therapy took care of the shortened muscle in his neck. He didn't care at all that he was wearing it. The biggest issue was that people would kind of look at him. I thought it was going to be awful and it was no big deal at all! Good luck!

My daughter had the same thing. We did physical therapy, which she hated. But, i decided not to do the helmet. If she was a boy i may have done it. She is now 4 and has a full head of hair and I do not notice a flat spot at all. It kind of fixed itself. I just could not stand the idea of her wearing a helmet for three months. I am NOT saying this is your answer, but it is what I did and I have no regrets.

A. Bengston

I'm sorry I can't give you any advise about the helmet, I don't have any experience in that department. I do have a cousin who's baby had to wear a helmet but I don't know the details and what exactly he had. Anyway, he is 4 now and doesn't have to wear it anymore. As for the emotions, have you considered that you might have post-partum depression? It is a natural thing to have after a healthy delivery and healthy baby, and I would think that you are under a lot of stress so it very well could be the cause of your overwhelming emotions. You should talk to your doctor. You have a lot to face with your daughter in the upcoming months and you need to make sure that you have your head clear so that you can be there for your daughter without breaking down yourself. I wish you the best of luck and take care of your baby, everything will be fine with treatment.

Hi A.,

I had twin daughters and one of them had to wear the helmet and do physical therapy for Torticollis. The helmet is really no big deal. I was a little upset about it in the beginning, but I would do it again in a heart beat. My daughters head is so much better now and I'm sooo glad that I did it. Not only for me, but mostly for her when she gets older. Really, it is nothing...just think of the future!!!

My daughter had the same problem and then we realized that everything she was ever in was on the same side of the room. Her bouncy chair and swing were on the left side of the living room so when she was in them she would look to the left to see the tv. In bed she had to look to the left to see me. In the car, the window was to the left. We switched everything around and in no time she was fine and her head was great. Do everything you can to get her to lay on the other side or turn her head the other way.
She's 4 months old now and can probably start sitting in an exersaucer some too. That will keep her off of her head.
Best wishes,
J.
Mom to 4, ages 6, 5, 4, and 2.

I wish I had some advice for you--but all I can offer is a Cyber Hug ***HUG***

Hope you get some good advice; hang in there and learn all you can! I will say a prayer for you...

C. in ND

We faced some of the same dilema with our now 4 yr old daughter.

Mom, first off, you haven't done anything wrong!

Have you thought of chiropractic care for the tight muscles in her neck? We were blessed enough with a chiro in town that actually gave free care for children up to 5 yrs old.

Besides that, we also propped her head with small blankets so she couldn't lie with the flat spot down. Give it a bit of time...the helmet doesn't have to happen right now....

A.,
My daughter was diagnosed with torticullus (sp?) (tight neck muscle where her head always laid on her shoulder) and plagiocephaly when she was 2 mos. We immediately started physical therapy at Gillette Childrens Hospital and with a lot of stretching and therapy we were able to correct the tilt and her head started growing normally... by 1 year she was perfect!! I definately recommend therapy.. but if she has to get the helmet have them put lots of pretty princess stuff on it (it turned out my daughter didn't need one but that is what I was going to do).. It is only a small time that you would need for her to wear it and would benefit her for a lifetime. Have a Merry Christmas!

Our oldest had torticollis really bad, and ended up with flat head (plagiocephaly). We did NOT do a helmet because our ped was quite laid back, and informed us that with physical therapy, visiting a chiro, and working with our son, his head would round out, and that even if we did the MINIMAL, it would round out anyway, and to not be overzealous about it.

I'm thankful that he was so laid back. We visited a chiropractor, learned some moves for physical therapy at home, and within 3mos his head had rounded out nicely. He's now 6.5 and his head is perfect.

My advice is, don't freak out, and don't be so overzealous about the helmet, its probably not necessary. Find a good chiro that works with children, and ask your ped for a physical therapy referral. Keep her out of the carseat unless you are in the car, out of the bouncer unless totally necessary, and use a bumbo or the exersaucer most of the time, she'll also be sitting up soon and it will take the pressure off. Basically keep her off her head... tummy time, sittign up in the bumbo or exersaucer.

It is ok to be emotional about this at first- I was too. Our daughter just turned one and from 5 months old we have been doing physical therapy on her neck for torticollis and she wore a helmet for about 4 months.
I will tell you it was the best thing we could have done. They get used to the helmet and don't mind it being there. It is very light weight and their are holes in it so it gives them some air.
Her flat spot is SO much better now.
And I don't know where you live but we went to Children's Hospital in Omaha, Nebraska. A plastic surgeon there told us that yes, to some parents, it is a cosmetic thing and they don't do the helmet but if you don't fix the flat spot and the tightness in their neck, it can cause other bone and muscle problems in their neck and face later that you don't want to put them through. The helmet really isn't that bad at all.
If you want to talk more or know about our experience, you can email me at ____@____.com

She’ll be fine; you’ll be fine. And, she will thank you later in life that you did this for her. I know – emotions run rampant after the birth of a child. We have three. Our middle child was diagnosed with Down syndrome at birth and now…low and behold…they think that he is on the autism spectrum as well. So, needless to say, I’m in your shoes too. That is not what I wanted to hear – particularly three days before Christmas.

We nearly went down the helmet road as well. Our son’s spot corrected itself. The one thing that corrected itself. We’ve had every surgery in the book.

I have had to develop a really think skin, and learned to hold my emotional outbursts in so as not to traumatize our other two children. It takes time, but you can do it too. It sounds cliché, but really, God does only give you what you can handle.

Sending well wishes.

When my daughter was born, she would only turn her head to one side when sleeping or in the carseat, and her head was getting flat on one side. I took her with me to the chiropractor and he started working with her. She was eventually able to move her head to both sides easily. Her neck muscles had been pretty tight. It seems like it took several months for her head to get to a normal shape after she was able to move her neck easily.

Hi A.,

My daughter at her 4 month check up the doctor has us go and see a PT about her neck too cause she would faver her right side and she had a flat spot. Then I got talking to her PT she told me about the helmet and I was sceptical about it. I went to the apointment for the helmet and the doc. told me that is was my choice if I wanted to do it or not cause hers was not that bad yet. I did decied to have her wear one. I am so glad that she did her head is so much better they put it on her at 5months and she had it off by 8 months old. She only wore it for 2 1/2 months most of them wear them for at least 3months. She was doing so good that she was able to get it off early. She is now 20 months old and I am so glad that we did it. I was very nervese like you are. But, you have to look at it as it is going to befit her in the long run to have it done. If you would like to chat more about it you can email me ____@____.com or send me a privet message back. hope that helps you out.

I can't say my son had to wear a helmet, but he had two brain surgeries at 6 months of age and it is difficult. All I can say is baby's heal fast and well. My son had tubes sticking out of his head for a week. Its hard not the cry and be emotional. Good luck and best wishes.

Hi A.,
My nephew has to have that. He's fine now, an active little boy. I've heard the helmet works well.
Peace and Blessings,
S.

A.,

My daughter who just turned one had to wear a helmet for 3.5 months when she was about 5 months old. I was devastated when we found this out, but we were told this would be harder on my husband and me then it would be on our daughter. Once we got the helmet fitted, my daughter adjusted very well. I decorated it with stickers and people always commented how cute she looked in the helmet. It did not seem to bother her at all and she was able to do everything that she normally did. You are doing the right thing. If anyone makes negative comments about your child in her helmet - just ignore them. Good luck - I promise it is not that bad :)

I highly recommend taking her for a chiropractic adjustment. I have taken all my 3 babies with excellent results. My son only nursed on one side when he was born and I took him for his first adjustment when he was 3 days old and problem solved. You may be able to avoid ALL this drama by going to the chiroprator. Good luck!

A. -
I am sorry to hear about what you are going through with your daughter. I don't have any info for you with the helmet however you sound a lot like I did after my daughter was born. She was born 3 1/2 months early and was in the NICU for 3 months and 5 days and wasn't originally expected to make it (she is now 10 months old). We were loosing our home due to foreclosure, we needed to find a place to live, and I needed to pack, and I was only getting 4 hours of sleep a night between trying to work, be there for my son and husband, spending time at the hospital, having mastitis, and nursing. I too was a wreck and I ended up needing assistance with it. I am currently on Celexa, a very low dose, and it doesn't make the world lovely with roses but I am able to cope better with life. It sounds to me like you may want to talk to your doctor about getting some help. This is not a sign of being weak, just human. I too would be a wreck if I was in your shoes. I am confident things will all work out well and as many wonderful and knowledgeable people have said to me in the last 10 months, "this too shall pass".

Good luck and if you need an ear let me know.

My now 3 year old had to wear a helmet for 11 weeks starting when he was 6 months old. It was one of the best decisions we've ever made for him. He wore it for 23 hours a day (total time, he would have it off for 15 minutes here and there) and didn't mind it at all. We went to Childrens in Minneapolis and they were great. You are very lucky it was caught early. Plagiocephaly is definitely something that is best treated when caught early. Most insurances don't cover the helmeting, though, so make sure your doctor talks to them and writes it up as a prescription. We have Blue Cross Blue Shield and had to fight with them to get it covered (even if it wouldn't have been covered we would have done it anyway, though). www.cappskids.org is an awesome website full of info on plagiocephaly.