Celebrating 2 Birthdays at Once... Help!

Updated on March 13, 2010
K. asks from New Braunfels, TX
13 answers

I am thinking of celebrating two birthdays with one big party. My daughter is turning 4 and my son is turning 2 in May... My daughter is in school two days a week, and has been invited to several of the girls' birthday parties this year. I'd like to invite these girls to our birthday celebration as well. I'm just not sure what to do about gifts. They don't know my son, and I would never expect them to show up with a present for him. But will people feel obligated to bring two presents if there are two names on the invitation? Will it discourage them from attending? Has anyone ever been to a party like this? I appreciate your thoughts!

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J.T.

answers from College Station on

When I had my 3 boys birthdays on the same day last year, I sent out invitations as if it was only going to be one boy's party. That way, no one felt obligated to get gifts for all of them. Now, some close family friends got all 3 a gift, but that was their choice. They knew it was a joint party. No one else did.

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S.S.

answers from El Paso on

My son had a friend in his class that had a twin in another class the parent only put the name of the child that was in my child's class and the name of the other child was given out in his class. I suggest adversting it as a double party but only include your daughters name on the ones you head out to her friends and your sons on his friends invitations.

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D.M.

answers from Houston on

I would send out two different invitations for each child. Send out the invitations to your daughters birthday with only her name on it and then do the same for your son. The guests can find out when they arrive that the party involves both your children. The invitations will be clear, the party will be self explanitory, so I think should cover the problem!

Have fun!

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S.O.

answers from San Antonio on

Awk-warddddd!

I have been to parties like that. Very awkward to keep kids of different ages with different friends entertained and having a good time.

Who would you be inviting for the 2 year olds' party? family? Must admit that 2 year olds don't have a large social circle. Bringing family in for both kids and your daughters' friends (and parents) to the same party could be quite something.

Can I ask, why have a birthday party for a 2 year old? I have suggested before that the first birthday is special and you want pictures. But some parents really go out for years 2, 3, 4...and I'm not sure why.

Keep the gathering small or dinner with the family and save the money for parties later on when bday parties with friends is important tot them.

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D.M.

answers from Houston on

I own a birthday party place in Cypress, Texas called Magic Moons and I have had a party for a brother and sister before where one was school age and the other wasn't. She was three and he was seven. His school friends brought presents for him and family and friends brought presents for both. It was a big party so I don't think anyone was discouraged from coming. Everyone had a great time and it turned out well.

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S.M.

answers from Houston on

We often have a dual birthday party, what we do is a bit different. When we have parties, we encourage our children to "give back" on their birthday, so we ask our guests not to bring gifts - but to bring something we can donate. We pick a charity (local animal shelter, food bank, etc) and look up their want list, and ask our friends to bring those items. We beleive a birthday party is a great opportunity to teach our children how to be generous :)

If that is not something your family wants to do, you could still accept gifts, and just not open them during the party. You could allow your children to open their gifts separately, that way they won't notice if one child gets more than the other.

Have fun!

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L.B.

answers from Corpus Christi on

Put a note on there as to the reasoning of the double party and who the other person is. Most parents will understand.
Also put a note on there that it is your daughter that is inviting them to her party.
Any gifts to your youngest child will not be necessary he will not really understand what is going on anyway.

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T.S.

answers from Houston on

Just do separate invitations for those people with just her name on them and do the ones for friends and family with both of their names on them.

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G.G.

answers from Austin on

I did this for my kids when my son turned 4 and my daughter turned 1. I was concerned about the very same thing but assumed guests would only bring gifts for the child they knew. I was wrong and felt terrible! Everyone brought gifts for both kids. Looking back on it, I would have either told them personally not to bring gifts at all (or if they insisted on bringing a gift then only for the child they were friends with). Or, have two different invitations.

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J.T.

answers from Victoria on

i was thinking for the first few years i could have a joint party for my son 2 and daughter a month behind him..new born. this does make a sticky situation. perhaps something like please no gifts " if you must bring a gift can you donate or bring a book". this way both kids get to use the gift. i have requested no gifts only to have a pile of gifts brought! guests will do what they want. dont feel too badly if they bring two it is after all both kids birthdays and you did give them an out!

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S.B.

answers from Houston on

Must be me but I think this is a terrible idea. My brother and I are 4 years apart but our birthday is one week apart. My husband and I have the SAME birthday only we are 4 years apart. I do NOT like to share my day. Yes, my birthday is my day. Everyone has a special day and its their birthday. That day is about them. Birthdays are a big deal in our family and I would never think of having a party for both my kids on the same day. Sorry. I just don't agree with this.

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L.G.

answers from Austin on

Sounds like way too many kids for me. I'd do a small dinner party with family for the both of them. If your son doesn't have his own friends, then don't do another party for him. Have a separate party with your daughter and her friends. What always worked for us was to invite the number of kids which was my child's age plus 1. Then you can tailor it to a little girl party.

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L.W.

answers from Austin on

We did this but only invited mutual friends of our 2 boys that would have come to the other's party anyway. We put both of the boys names on the invitation. Don't know about doing a boy girl party with 2 different age groups, though. I'd only put the name of the child (boy or girl) on the invitation...but this might make folks uncomfortable when they arrive. I think I'd have separate parties and that way the siblings can celebrate for each other, rather than ignore or compete with each other for the birthday honor. At this age I don't know if they would understand sharing and would more likely exist in separate worlds. To me its a missed opportunity for each to honor the other. If you are overwhelmed, scale back your expectations.

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