Cancelling Plans Last Minute by Text-am I the Only One....

I used to dislike texting. I love it now that I got into it. I used to think it was so hard to text out a message but its actually quite easy once you get into it and more practice.

I guess in my perspective, what would be the difference if she had called you and canceled at the last minute. Seems like canceling at the last minute is more the issue than the texting complaint.

See me, I prefer answering a question by text rather than the phone because I am on the phone all day long and being on it when I get home is not fun for me. But that's just how I feel.

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S.,

Instead of voicing your annoyance under the guise of "teasing", tell your friend that you don't text and you don't want to be texted. If she needs to communicate do it in person or by phone. I would also tell her that you are disappointed when she breaks/cancels plans at the last minute.

For me, unless there is a legitimate emergency, when someone does a last minute cancellation, it seems like they were waiting for a better offer and I was just a time slot filler.

Try letting her be the one that initiates the next few invitations. Back away from the friendship for a while. Make some new friends.

Blessings...

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If someone expected me to know that they texted me a message, they'd better call me and tell me to check my phone.

Texting is not on my list.

J.

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If she likes to text, so be it, and the fact that she likes to send you notes means she is thinking of you and likes you :) But texting to cancel plans in never ok, and I would talk to her about this. I know that I do not always have my phone on me, so I might not get a text until later, so if you are going to cancel you need to actually talk to the person to be sure they get the message.

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I usually text because I have ADHD and it's easier for me to pay attention to the conversation if it's in text form, that way I don't get distracted and forget half the conversation.

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I've got three teenagers and although I consider myself a technophobe, I have warmly embraced texting.

I am NOT a phone talker, never have been, friends and family members who text, I communicate with on a daily basis. Those who don't I rarely talk to.

I LOVE keeping track of my kids. They will always answer a text. It's a great tool for families.

I totally agree with you there are inappropriate times for texting.
I don't think it's going to go away though!

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I text all the time. It helps because I can talk all the time without my kids hearing what I'm saying. My husband and I sometimes communicate via text if we are not at home together and need to have some type of discussion. Because we both get so heated...sometimes texts make it worse though. But yea, I text all the time. It's more private and is easier if someone can't respond right away. I, on the other hand, despise voicemails!!

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I am a fan of texting for the most part. I feel like it saves so much time, like if I need to tell my sister something and I call her we could end up on the phone for an hour! Texting, I get my point across asap and save the chitchat for when we both have time.

I do think that the whole texting society has lowered etiquette standands considerabley. It is not OK to cancel last minute via text unless you first phone and are unable to reach, IMHO.

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Would you have been as unhappy if she had called you to cancel her plans? I think last-minute cancellations (except in an emergency, of course) are, well, annoying. Sometimes they're even ill-mannered.

I can't say anything about texting because my husband doesn't want the expense of my doing that. I don't really know if I can make my thumbs work that fast, anyhow....

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i never thought i would text, but since i got a phone that is basically made for texting thats pretty much all i do. Plus my relationship with my husband has gotten better because of it, he works on oil rigs and has bad reception, but can send and recieve texts with ease. We talk all day now.

I dont know, i usually dont text speak like omg, rofl brb ttyl, i type most things out, but i certainly prefer the convenience of this technology

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I think it is easier to text. I will text my husband if we need milk, girlfriend to see if her weekend is open, kids to tell them time to come home....etc. We have unlimited texting on our plan. I absolutley agree that canceling plans through text is rude though.

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My husband and his whole office are so into texting it drives me nuts. One time I put his phone in the fridge (not freezer) over night. Interesting thing about the fridge. The phone can't receive transmissions in there. So when you take it out they all start pouring in. I would never do it, but sometimes I ask my husband how much it would cost to replace his phone. I dream of handing him the cash, taking his phone and smashing it with a mallet. Sure he could replace it inside of 1 or 2 days, but the satisfaction would almost be worth it.

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I text because if someone is busy, they can respond whenever they want. For me its easier, and my phone has a regular mini keyboard, so its pretty fast and easy for me. =) If your really annoyed just tell her you are now getting charged for texts through your carrier and you cant do it anymore.

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I'm new to texting, too, as I got an iPhone for Christmas last year. While I think it's useful, it definitely isn't for long messages. I would say if you don't want her to text, don't respond to the messages. Or you can just let her know you don't text much, so just call instead.

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I'm not a text person, but I am an email/facebook person. You cannot get ahold of me by phone, and I cannot call anyone. Its a HUGE hassle to call someone, even for 5 minutes because I cannot hear on the phone and my kids always think that when mommy's on the phone its time to go crazy.

I know a lot of people who only like to talk on the phone, and I know a lot of people (like me) who can't talk on the phone. You have to know who your players are and accommodate them. I don't know what your friend's reasonings are, but she obviously has them. Just know that this is the way she communicates and go with it.

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My husband did something REALLY bad last week and apologized by text the next day. Still waiting for the real one. Probably never get it.

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I also hate texting! We only got it recently b/c my brother's girlfriend was pregnant and we knew he would never call us when the baby was born, but he would text.

I especially hate when I'm out with a group of people, and they're playing with their stupid phones instead of talking! Like, dude, I'm sure your droid is interesting and fun, but I'm right here trying to have a conversation!

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i started using texting in the past year. I think it's awesome...but ONLY for quick notes. I would never cancel plans via text or write lengthy things. It is convenient for quicky things...but not for a conversation or flaking. I think that's rude.
when I didn't text I used to tell my friends and family I didn't have texting on my phone and said I got charged for texts (which was true after so many texts).

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Oh yes- right there with you sister! Nothing is more annoying and also amusing to me than to watch a grownup sitting there texting on their phone like a teenager!! Glad I am not the only one who feels this way.

And I really HATE it when you are talking with someone and they begin texting mid-conversation!

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I am not bothered by text its just being inconsiderate that bothers me. Unless her kids got sick or something urgent its not very nice to make a habit of canceling on people if she wants to continue the friendship.

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Sometimes it's easier for me to grab my phone and text, or some of my friends prefer texts because sometimes they're too busy to get to the phone, or a baby is sleeping, etc. And what I have to say is just that, doesn't need a response or can wait for one, doesn't need to be a conversation. I have two friends who don't text at all, and it's pretty inconvenient considering sometimes as a preschool class coordinator I can contact everyone as a group except these two, then I have to take time, hope my kids are quiet, stop what I'm doing, and call them. It's really much easier to text! These two friends just tell everyone they can't get texts or have to pay for texts, and we all try to remember that!

Added: maybe tell her you didn't get the text and went anyway, not knowing she wasn't coming until you happened to look at your phone, and that next time please call if cancelling so you'll get the message! :)

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How about people texting in movie theaters - that really irritates me.

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My best friends husband texted her to tell her his dad had been found dead in Utah by the side of the road sitting in his pick up truck. She had been playing Scrabble on-line and then was helping a customer at the store and had her cell on vibrate. I told her her phone was vibrating and she said they'll send a text if it's important...well, wasn't it important.

She is one of those who text everything. If she texts me I usually just pick up and call her, I tell her I get tired of pushing all the buttons and would rather just talk. Then it's over and done with.

And yes, I do get texts telling me of a change in plans sometimes after we are supposed to be somewhere.

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Why did she cancel? If you're just going to the park, is one child sick? It depends upon the reason. But she sounds like she'd lie and make a believable excuse up...so yes, can't stand flaky people with flaky excuses. Best to invite them last minute or as a tag along with another friend, if you don't want to be left alone.

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I get annoyed because I don't have texting on my cell phone plan.

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I've got a neighbor that texts me randomly--sometimes I just don't respond. And I think canceling by text IS flakey and cowardly!

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I hate texts but I admit they have their convenience moments. I tell my friends I prefer a phone call. Just be honest with your friend and say, "please don't cancel on me via text, it is like being dumped on a post-it." ;)
I am a very frank and honest person. When you beat around the bush, people usually miss the message. Plus, they will appreciate knowing how you really feel instead of something superficial.

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