42 answers

Breastfeeding in Front of People...

I have no real reason for asking this, as I am not breastfeeding, nor am I pregnant! I was just reading the recent question about nursing shirts, and got to remembering when I was nursing...

I am wondering how you all feel/felt about nursing in front of people. Do you whip it out and nurse wherever/whenever? Do you need complete privacy? Are there people you openly nurse in front of and others you feel you need to cover up for? And nursing in public, do you? Do you go to a private area? Do you openly nurse in public?

For me, if I was at home, I'd pretty much just nurse openly around close family, particularly the women. If a man was present (minus my son's father, of course), I'd try to stay covered up, but my son never liked anything over him, so I'd just shield as much as I could by positioning my son in front of me, and pulling my shirt to cover as much as possible. But it was not uncommon in the summer, while enjoying our pool, to sit on the porch swing, and pull my swim suit top over, and let him nurse! In public, like at a mall or something, I'd usually sit on a bench, in a less populated area, and try to stay pretty covered, but I would nurse in public. And like many of you have said, I NEVER fed him in a bathroom. So gross and unhealthy.

How about you? Just curious.

What can I do next?

So What Happened?™

What circus? This is purely a curiosity question. No judgment whatsoever. To each his own. I was totally just wondering what other people do.

Mum4ever - So funny you mention that about the zoo animals! I was at a petting zoo with my son when he was little, but I was no longer nursing. I had his sippee in the side pocket of my bag, and the nosey goats were trying to get at it, when another mother called it to my attention... she said they'd take it right out of there... she told me that one time while she was still breastfeeding, she was at a petting zoo, and a baby goat (a kid, but I didn't want to say *kid* and be mistaken for a human child! - lol) came right up to her and latched onto her breast through her shirt!!! She was shocked! She said it was pretty hard to get it off, too! They do have a keen sense of smell, don't they? A little off topic, but an interesting story!

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Oh boy.
***sitting back waiting for the circus to start***

This is never a question that goes without several very judgmental people on either side responding to.

7 moms found this helpful

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I feel like breasts are private parts - I mean they get covered at the beach right? So although I am a HUGE BF'ing proponent, I still think it's courteous to cover up. Now that doesn't mean a huge shawl and being stuck in the corner, I mean my kid has as much right to eat in a restaurant as anyone else, but I don't just "whip it out" because it's "all natural".

For the most part if and when I nursed in public I did have a breastfeeding cover that was lightweight and provided privacy.

I do not want to see anyone's boobs, body fat, etc. and think letting it all hang out is rude and insensitive to other people. BTW - that goes for Speedos and thong bathing suits too! LOL

11 moms found this helpful

I am all for breast feeding. I think it is the healthiest, best thing for baby if you and baby are both comfortable and able to do it. I have no problem with women breastfeeding in public either. I don't think, however, that you should just let yourself hang out there. Be discrete. Yes, it's natural. So is pooping. I'm not gonna drop trou and take a dump in the middle of the grocery store simply because "it's natural".

11 moms found this helpful

There were several times I had to nurse in public as I had no other option (a bench is much cleaner than a public bathroom). I used a blanket and was always discreet, and most people paid no attention. I nursed more openly around friends/family, but still used a blanket.

I have a friend who nurses very openly in public. She lets her entire breast hang out and leaves it out for several minutes... even after baby is done nursing. Once she was at our home and remained virtually topless with her shirt pulled up for almost 20 minutes while her baby crawled around on the floor, it was so awkward my husband and children left the room.

So, while I am okay with the need to nurse publicly, I do believe there is a line, really though, it's sad that others would take offense to a feeding child.

(I agree with another mom, this is in regards to infants.. .nursing toddlers can wait till you get home.)

10 moms found this helpful

I am not a bf-er and I don't have any problem with those who choose to bf.

That being said...there's a difference between nursing your child in public and nursing your child in public just to make a point.

Your infant who is 1 year old or younger needs your breastmilk for nutrition. They eat frequently. They should have access to their food. No problem.

Your child who is 3 years old does not need to walk up to you in public, lift up your shirt, and start nursing. It is not a nutritional necessity; it is a comfort issue. That's bothersome to me.

You have to feed your baby, but you whip out the entire breast and expose the entire thing for extended periods of time. Sorry, but when you do this you aren't just doing this to feed your child; you're doing it to get a reaction and rise out of people. I have a problem with this - like I did with the woman who sat in Stride Rite with wide open, unbuttoned blouse, both breasts out for a minimum of 3 minutes. Unacceptable. You don't need to unbutton everything, you know you're a nursing mom and you probably have nursing tops/bras that can assist you in being discreet yet still feed your baby, you certainly don't need both of the girls exposed, and definitely not for that long of a period of time. I fully realize that very few women go to this extreme, but it is women like this that make it hard for those of you who can be respectful with the necessary act of feeding your child.

Whatever you do in your own house, backyard, your property is totally your business.

8 moms found this helpful

Oh boy.
***sitting back waiting for the circus to start***

This is never a question that goes without several very judgmental people on either side responding to.

7 moms found this helpful

Wow, I think it's great you were so comfortable nursing.

I have inverted nipples and extremely large breasts, so nursing required a lot of support latching on and staying on. So the first few months were just a lot of learning between me and baby.

Once we both figured out what position seemed to go the easiest, which was always just the basic cradle position, and my nipples came out on que, and the milk was established, and I wasn't clogged, I started to nurse more confidently in public.

I tried several of those nursing shirts and even a couple of dresses, only b/c they were gifts. I did not care for them. The most comfortable was just a cotton stretchy top that could be easily lifted, nursing bra flap let down, latch baby on quickly enough so I'm not sitting exposed for too long, then I could sit back and relax, even in restaurants.

The culture most turned off by my nursing in public is by far the middle eastern culture. We were at one Persian restaurant and they would not even come near our table until I was done. They were clearly disapproving of my public nursing.

And the most comforting of all creatures to me while I was nursing, were the Zoo animals. I've had more zoo animals come and nuzzle me gently and just stand as close as possible to me and calm down while nursing at the zoo. It does make me wonder how strong those pheromones are.

7 moms found this helpful

I nursed my infant thru toddlerhood in public. I am always as discreet as possible, but wouldn't put modesty above feeding my child if it came to that. I've had ppl verbally attack me while nursing, physically flinch, ppl ask me to leave, etc. Whenever I see a nursing Mother, I will ALWAYS go up to her and say what a great job she's doing and would she want some support (as in me sitting between her and most of the wandering eyes).

I've also participated in 3 Nurse-Ins... it is important to show the public that breasts are not men's playthings, but functional pieces of Motherhood and child-rearing. Americans easily forget this aspect of our mammary glands and are ok with thong bikinis, coochie showing skirts and cleavage busting out - but not allowing a Mother to peacefully breastfeed her child.

7 moms found this helpful

I would nurse in public at the beginning, i had a special crocheted blanket that i would interweave through my bra straps and id perch her on my arm. Nobody would ever see my nipple, and most of the time no one realized what i was doing. If there ever was a dressing room, or nursing room (rare) available id take it, but otherwise id do it discreetly. I didnt nurse in bathrooms, i dont want my daughter to eat around people doing that, with those smells and sounds, thats not what nursing is supposed to be like. At my own home i would expose my breasts when only women were around, im not shy about my boobs being out around people who have them also and are not attracted to breasts sexually(besides my husband, who of course saw me do this). If my husbands friends were over i would use a blanket to cover her.

the easiest times to breasfeed in the beginning was the beach and the pool, the bathing suit top and a towel make for a perfect system. I only got a rude look once, at an aquarium diner this mother looked at me in horror, and removed her children from my line of view, i looked at her right back in horror, she deserved it (i wasnt even showing anything)

furthermore id like to put a big "shame on you" to those women who jeer and complain at breastfeeding mothers. breastfeeding is a natural, god given right, and is the best thing for the baby. A new baby needs to eat on cue, that might mean in public, a new moms job is hard enough without people judging her for her, actually quite wonderful and difficult, decision.

I could never live with myself knowing that my bad behavior was contributing to depriving an infants very needed meal, or playing a part in a new moms decision to bottle feed.

7 moms found this helpful

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