Bored SAHM

I've learned that kids have a great ability to entertain themselves if they don't watch much tv (like no more than 5 hours a week). If you have very basic toys, like what was around 50 years ago, (blocks, legos, little green soldiers, tinker toys, lincoln logs) then they can let their imaginations run wild, and a block can be an airplane, monster, or whatever. You shouldn't have to entertain them much at all. Also, it helps a ton to totally childproof your home so that they can't get into things that you don't want them in. I often let my 2 year old just shower with me so I don't have to worry about what he's up to. I did the same with my now 5 year old, until one day he said "hey, you don't have a pee pee" when he was three. That was the last shower with me for him. Do you have a back yard they can play in? I love John Rosemond, and got a lot of these ideas from his books, Making the Terrible Twos Terrific and his Six Point Plan for Raising Happy Healthy Children. You should have a lot more freedom at home, and he teaches you how, and he is fun and interesting to read. If you do those things, the kids will be all the more creative, imaginative, and able to entertain themselves. His website is www.rosemond.com. You are not a bad mom. There's a lot to learn about child rearing; we're all learning. Good luck to you!

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Hi T.,
First of all, NEVER, feel like a terrible stay at home mom! It sounds like you do a lot more than a number of moms do already. Me included. The thing is, you don't need to be the entertainer and they don't need to be entertained 24/7. What I have focused on since my kids were really little is encouraging them to play together. We started in the bathtub. They were confined to a small space and I would start games for them to play together. Then they would start making up there own games and next thing I knew, they were running around the house like crazy animals playing together. I was able to do the things that I needed and wanted to do. Now, it's not always like that, but mostly. One other thing, I no longer have their toys in my living room. All the toys are in their bedrooms. They are really happy to go into their rooms, have some quiet time surrounded by all of their favorite toys! So, never feel guilty for not entertaining your kids. Instead, teach them skills and give them tools they can use to be independent people.Oh! One last thing! When you turn off the TV, turn ON THE MUSIC! It's a nice transition. Put something that you like on. Something fun. They'll like it too! Maybe a dance party will erupt!
Good luck,
A.

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Don't feel bad! You ARE bored on some level...it doesn't mean you don't love them and do enough :) You can take them to parks....Grass Lawn Park in Redmond opened 2 awesome new play areas geared for all ages, and there may be others in your area (not sure where you live). Or other outdoor adventures, check with ParentMap and sign up for weekly updates on kiddie activities, go to the Science Center or Aquarium, etc.
Otherwise letting them play on their own is healthy, and you can take up a hobby, garden or chat with us :)
Take care,
Liz Brandegee
Classical Homeopath

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You need to get out of the house! Take walks, go to the playground, sign them up for music or art classes, or playgroups, the library... ANYTHING. Take them to lunch or go get coffee with them (steamers for them). You WILL be bored if you stay at home all day!

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Hi T.,

Because I didn't want to 'entertain' all day as well, I made sure we had somewhere to go everyday, even if it was just to the park. Our outings went best if they were in the morning. It could be to the swimming pool, the zoo, the aquarium, or just driving around until we found a new place to explore. When we first moved to Redmond, my boys, who are 13 months apart, were only 18 mo. and 30 mo. I didn't have any friends yet, so I checked out programs at the parks and rec department, etc.

Do you like to read or cross-stitch, knit or sew? I used to do that in the room while the boys played. Also, I got on the floor with them as we built things with Duplo, made up puppet shows with their stuffed animals, retelling their favorite stories using the animals as characters. We also did a LOT of crafts- painting, play-do and baking. The boys loved to help me make cookies,tear up the lettuce leaves for the salad and put in the other goodies after I chopped them up. The more you get them involved in helping around the house, making it a game, the easier it will be for them when they transition to having their own chores. My boys are now 13 and 14 and although they complain as any teenager would, they can make a mean salad, whip up a batch of cookies and even make dinner if they need to!

Good luck and have FUN!
C.

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I like and agree with Becky's response. I know I felt a lot of pressure to entertain my son when he was younger. Biggest thing you can do is GET OUT OF THE HOUSE!
I find this to be a real issue (the sitting inside watching TV) during the winter when it is hard to get outside. Other moms suggested joining a support group, which was a huge influence for me when my two younger kids were babies. It really does help.
Some other ideas are: Library, parks, any form of water (ie: lakes, ponds, rivers, the bay...), blow bubbles in the yard, sidewalk chalk. Just get them out and exploring the world around them every day! It will improve your mood, too, to get outside in the sun and fresh air.
The American Academy of Pediatrics says one hour of TV a day is ok. So if you need that to cook dinner, don't feel guilty.
And it is not your job to entertain them all day, like the other moms said. Kids have awesome imaginations.

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Sounds like you need to get out and do some things. Here are some ideas for you:
- Mom's playgroup (I go to one at Esther Short Park every Wednesday morning...e-mail me if you're interested!)
- Cafe Sip-n-play (164th in Vancouver)
- Jamison Square in downtown Portland (great little water fountain for kids to play in and park area in the Pearl)
- Library Story Times....check out your library website.
- Local swimming pools in your area?
- Kid's Club (Vancouver)
- Portland Zoo/Children's Museum
- Free kids movies at Regal Cinemas at 10 a.m. on Tue/Wed
At Home:
- Let them run through a sprinkler!
- Do a craft together or a puzzle.
- Color/draw with them
- Take a walk
Even just getting out and doing at least one activity a day, helps the day to move along faster. And don't feel so guilty about the T.V. as long as it is limited, sometimes....especially on a really hot day, settling down for a movie is a good thing! I think summer is hard, because there is not much schedule...and they wake up earlier, and have a harder time getting to sleep because of the light. But anyway, you're not alone out there...I sometimes fight the boredom too. You just gotta get up and do stuff, even if you don't feel like it, and if you can't afford something, then at least take walks:-) Have a great summer, and please feel free to contact me if you want to know more about my mom's group!

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Get this book: "365 TV-free Activities You Can Do With Your Child" by Steve and Ruth Bennett. You can probably find it at the library, we got ours at Goodwill. Lots of great ideas for activities and crafts!

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It's not your job to entertain them, it's your job to take care of them ;). God made kids super-smart, and they can figure out how to entertain themselves.

I do find they like me to be in the same room. If there is a task I can do in that room, cool, if not, my favorite thing ever is to read, so I can bring in my magazine or a book, and only pay attention when they need to show me an accomplishment ... when they were younger I would bring in a blanket and a pillow, secure the door, and take a nap!!

this other new strand is about cutting tv time, and I am the only commenter so far, but if it flies it might be interesting to you as well (I don't think Mamasource sends the same links to every person each day, is why I add this here):
http://www.mamasource.com/request/13780371733380857857

--K. :).

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If you live in the Portland area, check out Portland Parks and Recreation (www.portlandparks.org). They have summer activities at many of the outdoor parks (the outdoor movies are a blast!) and a ton of classes and drop in activities at the community centers for free or really cheap. You could also check out meetup.com to find a playgroup with similar interests as yours. Public libraries have story times and activities as well. When my daughter (age 3) and I get bored and need to get out sometimes we will pick a destination a few miles away (Target, a coffee shop) and load up the stroller and walk there.
Good luck, I think all moms have been in your boat!

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I find that the best thing to do to keep my kids busy (8, 2 and 3 weeks) is to go places. On Tues and Wed there are free movies at the Supermall. We have a zoo pass. There are story times at the library. Of course, there is always the park. The other thing is that you shouldn't feel like you have to entertain your children ALL of the time. You said yourself that they are good at playing by themself. While I was still in school for early childhood education one of the things that we learned was that "free play" time is very important for children's development.
It sounds to me that you are doing a great job!

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I like to have one outing every day. This keeps me busy and keeps the kiddo entertained. There are TONS of cool parks to visit (free), plus the community centers' open gym play, plus the zoo, children's museum, etc. Sometimes we just go to the grocery store, but it's rare that we are home ALL DAY. I would go nuts with that scenario.

Plus, any way you can move the computer to where they play? I am spoiled with my laptop and wireless internet.

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With the older one going off to school you will find that the days go by quicker.
I have often faced the same issue, some of the things I have done. I limit TV time to one show and one movie a day. This way I am able to shower, cook, take a breather, etc. while the kids are distracted. I second the "simple toys" post. My sons have found more fun in a bag of legos, or a train set than any noisy light up toy. Maybe try and do a simple crafts, you can find a bunch online that are fun, easy, and don't require much effort. And most importantly if they get bored ask them what they want to do. You don't have to entertain them every second to be a good mom. As much as you need time alone, they do too.

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HI, I too am a SAHM and I have found that we have to leave the house. Kudos to you on 20 pages!! You aren't a bad mom--you need to check out your community!! We go to the park, we go to the museums, the library. We have a very busy schedule of free or almost free activities through the library and community centers. Also, when your 4 1/2 year old starts pre-school I have found it helpful to bring my toddler with me to pick up my son from preschool and I bring a snack and we hang out and play in the playground for about an hour before heading home again.

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You are amazing--- I am so delighted to see you pinpoint the issue: -- it is hard for you to feel required to spend hours playing with - but turning on the tv so you can breathe a bit becomes a problem becasue your momentary inattention ( gee, are you HUMAN ---? --- oh, ummm - yes, so are we--------) becomes an opportunity for a little guy at a very challenging age to create some chaos that you then have to deal with. Oh, my yes- been there. So, here's my suggestion- create for yourself a little list of sure-fire ways to keep them moving while you breathe -- maybe some really soft balls that they CAN throw in the house - that only come out when you need to wtch a favorite show or get on-line--- or perhaps some really cool ''color wonder' markers and papear that they can't draw on the furniture with- and again- they only come out when----
maybe a zip lock bag with neon play dough--- the idea is - some stuff that is only available when you need to attend to your business or your sanity-. ( and for the 4 year old- you can certainl tell him ''' I am trying to have you enjoy your job of playing nicely for a few minutes- if you make a problem or a mess -- next time you will have to come and sit down by me while I work - and that would be a bummer''''

The pre-school for him is perfect --- back in the past- ( my older kids pushing 40) he would be going up and down the street to play with freinds - or go to a neighborhood buddies house--- but almost none of us live like that anymore - and that makes life really hard for young Moms like you.

You get a star

J.
aka - Old Mom

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You're not a terrible SAHM. It's hard to entertain little ones every day, day in and day out. I am a SAHM as well and I often feel like I let my 3 year old watch too much TV. Primarily he watches TV while I get ready in the morning and check a few emails.

Here's my suggestions. Don't have the TV on while you eat breakfast. The eating is the activity, so you can leave out the TV. Use the TV while you get yourself ready and then head out of the house for an hour or so (whatever is allowed with your younger one's nap schedule). Try setting up some play dates with your older child's friends once or twice a week. He's old enough to go to a friend's without you, or you can have one of his friends over. Typically, kids play better together when it's just them and not social time for you and the parent too. It seems they compete for your attention if all parents are present. Coummunity Centers offer a lot of classes and are relatively inexpensive, and Gymboree also offers classes for siblings.

You might consider reading while your kids play together, especially if they play well, or getting online is not a big deal either as long as you keep the TV off. I use TV only in the afternoon when I need to make dinner.

I try really hard to get out of the house EVERY day and go do something. Whether it's a walk to the park, a trip to the zoo, or a play date with friends.

Don't beat yourself up on the TV issue. Remember that you're doing the best you can! I'm not sure where you live, but I'm in Bellevue (just moved here from Edmonds) and if you want some ideas of what specifically to do in your area, I'm happy to provide some suggestions. I wrote a book called Bringing Out Baby, Places to Take Babies and Toddlers, so I have lots of ideas.

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Hi T.,
I didn't read all the other posts, so forgive me if I repeat.
Put the kids in a stroller and go for a walk. You can walk to the park if you have one walking distance. Or, just walk. You can talk to your kids while you walk.

Go to a MOPs group, mothers of preschoolers, or another group like it. I think MOPs might be GEMs now. There you will find other mothers of kids under five. From there, or if you already have friends with little ones, arrange a play date for the kids. The moms get to visit while the kids play together.

Take a music class for small children. Here we have Kindermusic, I don't know what they have near you, but I am sure they have something.

Take them to swimming lessons. I think they are both old enough.

Take a parenting class. My son is 13 now and I have taken at least four classes and read at least four books on parenting. I don't think anyone is exempt from needing to take them. Even if you go and don't learn anything new, it reminds you so when you need it, you remember it. Here you will find other parents to play date with also.

Go to the zoo, or other animal habitat. We don't have a zoo here, but we have Wildlife Images and the Great Cat World Park.

Get a kiddie pool and let the kids play in it.

Plant a garden. If you don't have the room in the ground, plant a couple of tomato plants and some lettuce in some pots. The four year old would love caring for vegetable plants and then eat them.

Get some toddler puzzles and do them together.

Run through the sprinklers.

I hope something here helps.
Blessings,
J.

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So far I have an 8 month old, but for me and my sister (with a 4 year old and an 8 year old) here's what works:

We bit the bullet and just got up earlier to shower. We never use the internet except when there is another adult or at scheduled times (nap time). Using the internet whenever we jonzed for it just made us ignore the kids' needs and made them bored. Haivng a schedule is the best thing I ever did for them.

The morning routine is about walking and reading. The kids play on their own, but in sight while the kitchen is cleaned after breakfast and lunch. We go outside for at least two hours a day in the summer/spring. In the winter that outside time is spent at the library or doing something more exciting in the house: make and take down the fort, slow motion chase, etc. We live in a rural community, so we also send the kids into the barn or arena to let them run around for 1/2 an hour at a time.

The afternoon is a little lower key, when the preschool pages come out and another book is read. Mamma's groups, farmer's markets, and play dates take up time, as does driving to them.

You are right, that you don't need to entertain them every minuet. Each time I get out the cooking and canning material, I feel I'm ignoring the baby. But she's fine watching me while playing with a toy or two on her own. If she wants up, I cuddle a moment then put her in her high chair so she has a safe view of what I'm doing. My sister's kids sit at the kitchen table coloring and cutting out pictures while we work.

We watch TV as a family, one episode, and then only when Daddy is home so Mommy and Daddy can talk about the day after dinner and bath time. I still feel guilty about that, but we make the TV something that we aren't focused on and the talking to each other and about something that happens on screen the important part of the experience.

That's what's worked so far for us! Good luck and let us know what you come up with :)

There are days that I feel like you do.

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Feeling couped up can make anyone crazy. Get out of the house every day. Go to the zoo, the aquarium, the children's museum, the park. Anything, just get out. It will do you some good and your kids. I know that if I don't have one outing a day I will go stir crazy. And, don't beat yourself up about not wanting to entertain them every second. They should be able to entertain themselves sometimes. Maybe get a book to read while they play so you can be in the same room with them. Hang in there. Summer is almost over and when school starts you will wonder where all your free time went.

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Good for you for challenging yourself on this!

Old habits are hard to break. But, as with anything good for you, if you can push through that beginning phase, you'll be greatly rewarded! I say...go ahead...make a change!

Unplug your t.v. It won't give you the option to turn it on -you can even move it to another location without a socket, if you have to. Just for awhile. It's great to find out that you CAN live without it and that your children will be BUSY, not bored. It's the same philosophy with food as it is with entertainment. You don't have to choose donuts, burgers and chips to get them to eat - if a child is hungry, EVENTUALLY, s/he will eat, even the healthy stuff! :-) And if you leave children to "learn" to be creative, imaginative, etc. - surprisingly, they WILL FIND THE SKILLS!

You may have to offer some direction to kickstart the ideas - but you shouldn't have to oversee it all. It's sad, but, these days, so many kids aren't PRETENDING anymore - they don't spend hours 'playing house' or whatever - you know, that normal stuff children DO, when left to their own devices, unswayed by media and pop culture... Trust me, it may take some getting used to, given what they are used to at this point, but there is a great reward in breaking the current cycle you've got going.

People often comment on the fact that our kids are able to entertain themselves (peacefully, at that) for HOURS. It's because they're used to having this unstructured, creative playtime. This kind of time gives childre their own room to create games, scenarios, excitement. For example, one day, my husband and I were asked to come to the "Golden Pepper" - a restaurant they had created. There was a sign on their door, a curtain that separated the "dining" from the "kitchen", etc. One was the waitress, another, the singing "entertainment" and the third, a chef. They had created menus, served plastic food and it was just downright hilarious. Another time they created costumes from whatever odds and sods they had to do their version of the book, Charming Opal. no mom needed to poke and prod them into being what they naturally want and need to be - children.

I contend children don't need our constant direction and involvement to have fun and learn to work and create, together. It's great for them to have time to negotiate, among themselves, who does what - what the game is, what their part in it will be, etc. Of course arguments do arise. And, of course, you will have to parent at those times. But, you will be amazed, in time, at how much you AND your children get out of something as simple as unstructured time; unstructured play. As long as you're "around" (I love to weed the garden while they're playing outside - they can find me, I can hear them and all of us enjoy the time greatly), all will be well.

I think you're TOTALLY NOT ALONE - that many parents feel they have to entertain their children constantly - because this is what's "fed" to us in our culture these days. I don't know about you, but when I was a kid, we did lots of stuff without being entertained by our parents - and we all turned out fine! If you want, go check out a piece I wrote on this subject on my blog - http://tristansepinion.blogspot.com/2008/05/how-much-has-...

T., GOOD FOR YOU for confronting this feeling in yourself - that you're unhappy with how things are; that it's draining to feel the pressure of entertaining them every moment of the day - that something isn't working. This tells me you are willing to be honest with yourself and that you have ambition, as a mom, to do the best job you can do for your family. This is the toughest and most meaningful job in the world! And you clearly have what it takes to make changes that will lead to much more joy and greater feelings of success in doing it well! My hunch is that it will feel bizarre, at first - know that they will likely reject it (just as a child fed on fast food will balk at vegetables until hungry enough) - but, eventually, if you stick with it, you'll find an even greater reward than you ever thought possible.

At the end of the day, isn't it a JOY to see children who are happy and creative and busy?!

I hope this helps - my very best wishes to you and your children.

- T. B.

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Hi T.,

I think the suggestions so far are fabulous! But I haven't seen many suggestions to keep you from getting bored too (which is something I fear as a new mum contemplating staying at home). So here's my idea...a treasure hunt with some other mum and dads in your neighborhood. (This wouldn't be an every day thing ;)

I'm thinking you can go from house to house (over a period of a few hours), the kids can be looking for the "treasure" (maybe a snack at the last house), following a set of hidden clues while you and the other SAHM/Ds get a chance to visit, have a glass of wine, etc.

This may be more appropriate for kids a little bit older...but I think the 4 1/2 year-old could enjoy it.

I've also been watching online educational talks at www.ted.com. (This is for you, not the kids.)

Eventually I'd like to join a playgroup...and in the meantime, I go for walks in the park and to the library.

Have fun...sounds like your a great mum!!! (Only a great mum would take the time to care.)

1 mom found this helpful

Hello T.,

I don't seem to have a problem getting bored because I have TOO much to do. One thing I started to do with my son is to take him to the community center. They have activities for kids of all ages and some of them you can even do with him. I started taking him to Karate classes, basketball, but they have other craft classes or activities that ou could enjoy with him. I also take him swimmnng. I would think that it would be easier for you because you may have a more flexible schedule during the day and they always have a lot of things going on during the day. This gets you out of the house for a while, he meets other children, makes friends, you don't get bored and you baby can also enjoy some of the activities.

I usually have my son help me with what I am doing. Make a cake, cookies, wash dishes, or putting them away. I found my son always wanted to help so I let him. This make him feel important.

I think that he may need to interact more with other kids.

Being a stay at home mom doesn't mean you are bound to the house (unless you live at the North Pole). I'm sure you have a library nearby that has a kids program (where a volunteer reads to your kids, puts on pupet shows, etc.), a park you can walk to, a church where you can go to meet other new moms and form playgroups. Pick up a free newspaper from the library that lists all the goings on in your town. There is SO much out there to do!

Alot of local churches have a MOPS (Moms of Preschoolers). I found those to be a great way to connect with other moms. Play dates help relieve the boredom as well, and its ok for you to take a few minutes for yourself through the day so that you can recharge your mommy batteries.

What did you like to do before you had kids? I had (and have) five big loves: reading, writing (novels, plays, poetry), piano, sewing, and painting/drawing. For a few years, the only thing I managed to do was writing (during naps). Now, though, I involve my kids in all of it. My oldest (7) writes books when I write, stapling papers together and then writing and illustrating a story, while my son plays (he's not into that yet). I sew stuff for me, and for them, and they help me. Painting and art is the best. I have my professional watercolors, but I also have sets for them that are washable (and they are really cheap!), so we all get to paint for a while. And most of what I do allows me to watch the kids at the same time, in the same room, so no tv has to help out, although we sometimes treat ourselves to a kids' movie.

I understand the boredom...for all of you, but don't think that structured play is all that helps them. It is actually GREAT for them to play on their own, with you just watching so nothing gets out of hand. But find something YOU love, and make sure you do it every single day, even if it's for an hour after they go to bed or before they get up (or during a show). You have to keep in contact with yourself and your own needs, or your whole house will suffer.

Good luck!

Hi T.,

I am a 30 y.o. SAHM in the same boat as you! Regretfully, I have nothing of real value to offer you other than a friendly "you're not alone" ! I'll be sure to read your responses, to see if you can't help me too! Best Wishes in finding the answers!

Hi T.,
I'm glad you are thinking about the issue with TV. TV is not good for your children's mind development. Remember that TV is a new invention, and children have previously thrived without it. There are plenty of well written essays about it, so I won't go on about it here. If you turn off the TV, you'll find that your kids find things to do. We have a 21 month old who has never watched TV, and we don't have any plans to introduce him to it in the next several years. We have his toys out in the rooms that we hang out in, the kitchen and living room, and he just putters around. Open ended toys are the best I think, for holding kid's attention. Mega blocks will amuse my son for hours, literally. Spacing their day with regular snacks/meals, self-play, nap, walks, and reading, (and an errand or two) and I think you'll have a peaceful day, with just enough time to get your things done. TV is a hard habit to break, but you'll be happier without it. Also I'm usually happy being a solitary person, but I've found with having a child that I do like to connect with other moms. Our neighborhood has a couple of playgroups going at the community center, and maybe yours does too?
Best wishes!

You never mentioned playing outside. This can (and should!) be done everyday unless there is a downpour!
Being outside can eat up lots of time and it's a great learning environment for kids.
Other than that, the local library is a great place for planned (and unplanned) activity.
But I agree with other moms, you shouldn't have to entertain your children all the time. This is great development for them to learn to entertain themselves. Have a few, or more than a few if space allows, toys that are "special". Meaning you only bring them out a couple times a week, when you need to get something done and they get very involved and interested with the new activity. Be sure to put it back away when they are done and have cleaned it up!

I would find some kind of hobby that you could do. The kids might enjoy helping. My four year old likes to help me bead and embroider.

I used to feel like I needed to entertain my daughgter all the time, but realized that I wasn't doing her any favors.

How else are they to develop a good imagination? It is ok for them to get bored and find somethin to do. Just make sure you have simple toys (blocks, animals, cars, etc.) in areas throughout the house.

When I tell my daughter she needs to play by herself, she will find her race cars and ponies and play for an hour (happily).

The teachers at her preschool always comment on how she plays well alone with the bucket of animals!

You aren't a bad mom, just give them some more freedom (with supervision) to do their own thing. Read a book, cook something tasty, get some organizing done,etc.

Well, If you live in or near Yelm there are couple of things to do. We go to the Yelm Gymnastics Center on Fridays at 9:30, they have a toddler open gym in the morning. Also the yelm library has a story time for preschool age on Wednesdays and younger kids on Tuesdays. There is also a moms club of Yelm that i recently found out about, I do not belong to it because my kids are school age. But they seem to have alot of fun. Good luck, I felt the same way when my kids were younger and I thought I was really hard to find things in Yelm

The YMCA has been my personal sanity saver. We're on the family plan - so it comes with up to two hours of child care each day plus a reduced rate for lessons. I have my five year old and twin two year olds signed up for swimming lessons. (While one has a lesson, the other two are playing in the child care area. When the lesson is over, the swimmer is tired from playing in the pool and the other two are tired from playing with the toys and equipment!) My five year old is also signed up for "Pony Camp" later this month so he'll spend some time learning how to ride a pony.

I have a friend who actually works for a few hours each week at the Y so she doesn't have to pay the monthly fee.

Ooh girl, I here ya! I am a SAHM of a 3 1/2 yr old and 15 mo old and I can't tell you how much TV we watch and how bored I get! Summer is a little bit better because we can get outside and go for walks, swimming, parks etc. Up until now I have been a part time student so that kept me pretty busy but now I have decided to go back to work. For lots of reasons one of them being that my children are better entertained and learn more at daycare/preschool then they do with me at home. I don't really have any advice, it sounds to me like you are doing as much as you can, I just wanted to let you know there are others out there just like you. Take care, T.

I am sure that most of the moms are goingt o say take them to the park, go walking, have more queit time around that house, I have learn and read that children need to play be themselves with no parent or sibiling to help them explore. Play int he back yard. Recent ly i bought a big pool for my older daughter (10) and baby pool for my 9 month old and they have hours of fun. Trust me i understand, it can be hard to entertain the children with your self included. IF you want to spend no more than 7.95 (military price for you and one child) other baby is free, i talk my children to the CHildrens hands on musuem in Olympia, event he baby did well in there. They even have an area where you can set and eat. If yo live in Lacey, there is a swimming area off of carpenter rd near the fairgrounds that is nice, they have life guards. Are there any moms in your area that you get along with, where you guys can have play dates??

I don't know if this will be a popular response or not...but you don't need to entertain them all day. Otherwise, how are they going to learn how to entertain themselves? I often work from home and find that my daughter actaully uses her imagination (which she's just starting to really discover) and plays with her toys when the tv is off. However, that doesn't mean that I have to be her court jester! If you get bored watching than be a good example by diving into your summer book reading list.

But there are things going on in your town, you just have to be the "joiner" type of personality.

You aren't alone in your feelings at all - I actually relate to it quite well. But now that my daughter has started her own games, my anxiety has eased quite a bit. Good luck!

p.s. TV is not a bad thing if it can get you a shower....

Hi T.,
Playdough, puzzles, color books, arts/crafts, games, make a fort with blankets, play outside (if possible)-bubbles, soccer, bikes, bowling (empty water bottles and a small ball)....just a few ideas that my kids love. If I'm not doing one of these things with them, then I enjoy watching them while keeping an eye on a good book or magazine.

:)

I understand. I have days like that. Sometimes I think having two will keep me busier and less bored. At the same time when I do have projects to do they don't seem to get done because childcare comes first.
Do you take your kids outside in the nice weather? You didn't mention it but my daughter loves outside and it runs off energy where their screams or laughter don't seem as loud.
What do you do for you? I enjoyed attending MOPS last year and plan on going back to the group this year. Time with other adults, especially moms was great. check out mops.org. I believe they list MOPS groups closest to you.
Another suggestion find things you and your youngest can do while the oldest is in preschool. Even running errands or window shopping would be easier and more relaxing with just one.

Hi there - I belong to a mom's group and we have planned activities and play dates and such. I unfortuanately have to get another job, so I have to rely on my mom and hubby's mom to watch our son. You can go to momsclub.com and search to see if there is a location near you. I also got these card from Bright and Beyond - they have these cards that have all kinds of different activities you can do with your child. It ranges from baby to toddler to all ages. It's really cool. Good luck with your discovery.

Don't worry, you are a great mom because you do spend time with them. I'm going through the same thing except I'm not a SAHM. But even when I'm home and I've had enough playing and I got to clean house, etc, I can't play with them all day long. I try and teach my 6 yr old that she has to learn to play by herself or with her baby brother, but I catch her standing around with a sad look on her face. It' frutrating, and I try to remind her that I won't buy toys for her any more if she won't play with them. My daughter is always doing the: "after that then what, then after that then what are we going to do"...AAH! It makes me crazy.

Anyway, I just wanted to tell you you are not neglecting your kids if you make them play by themselves. Heck it's summertime, if you got a backyard, kick them out and let them play outside! :)

Do they get outside play time?? What about blowing bubbles, sidewalk chalk, etc.? You could go for a walk or go to a local park for a picnic. Also, you should not have to entertain them every minute. Do they have toys that they will play independtly with? I know from experience, that some kids play on their own better than others. My older one has always been able to entertain himself for hours, while my younger one almost always has to be playing with someone. Also, if you want to do educational things, try hands on activities like puzzles. Twenty pages in a workbook is way too much!! Anyhow, I hope this helps! S.

Don't feel bad, I only have one child (17 mos) and I am constantly trying to figure out what to do with him! I think a routine really does help as does utilizing anything you may have around you: church moms groups, libraries, parks, the zoo, the internet (craigslist) to find other moms in your area, etc.

For me, my saving grace is my health club. Every day that I can, I go there for 1 - 2 hours and work out, shower, even sit and have a cup of coffee. The childcare is super cheap (2.75/hr) and I can peek in anytime! It keeps me sane and my son entertained! :) Good luck!