14 answers

Bite Mark on My Toddler's Arm Today.....

my daughter is in daycare 5 days a week. tonight, i was giving her a bath and saw a bite mark on her left arm. the daycare teacher usually gives a daily note about our daughter's day at the daycare, but she didn't mention anything today when i picked up her up. either the teacher forgot - i don't know. i'll find out monday. anyhow, comes monday and if she doesn't know about this - should i complain that they need to monitor the kids??? suggestions or opinions are welcome! thanks.

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So What Happened?™

update: i found an old bite mark on her right arm! it's fading but definitely a bite mark! seriously, kids cry when they get bitten,no? my daughter is pretty loud and she does make you aware. i took pictures to show the teacher and director on monday. my daughter is 20 months old. i asked her who bit her and she would mention a name but of course -i'm not sure. i appreciate all your advice and thanks again. will keep you posted on monday.

update: monday 2/1/10
this morning me and my husband went to the daycare to drop off my daughter. i brought pictures of her bite marks just in case. i told the teacher about it and she was surprised. she told me that there is a new boy in the class that started last week. the mother of this boy told them that he bites and pulls hair! she also said that my daughter's been in the daycare for a while and this happens so she really thinks that its this boy. my husband complained as well to the supervisor and director of the daycare and they were very sympathetic about what happened to my daughter. they told us it's unacceptable behavior and it will be rectify immediately and will keep an eye on my daughter. thank you all for all your advice and opinions! i am so thankful and grateful.

Featured Answers

I do in-home daycare and let me tell you, the biting happens so fast that it is impossible to always catch it. IF her teacher saw it happen, or found the bite after (if) she cried, then yes, you should have been informed. Keep in mind that not all accidents can be prevented, but only managed afterward, even by the best watchful eyes. I would mention it to them on Monday, just to let them know that need to watching for a biter.

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My son is in day care 5 days a week as well. I know that they do the best that they can. But maybe she did not cry when it happened and the teacher did not know. I would alert them that it happened, but I am not sure if complaining is going to do anything. Things happen when kids are together. I know my daycare tells us when he gets the smallest scratch, and it sounds like yours might as well. I would say something more so they are aware, and they might have been and she forgot to put the note to you. I trust my daycare and if something like that happened to my son, I would say something so they know. They might have an idea of who did it and they will keep an eye on that child more closely. I know that things happen and cuts, scrapes, bites all happen it is part of daycare life.

I hope your little one is okay. Good luck on Monday.

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I do in-home daycare and let me tell you, the biting happens so fast that it is impossible to always catch it. IF her teacher saw it happen, or found the bite after (if) she cried, then yes, you should have been informed. Keep in mind that not all accidents can be prevented, but only managed afterward, even by the best watchful eyes. I would mention it to them on Monday, just to let them know that need to watching for a biter.

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C.-
I would bet your daughter can tell you who bit her. My son from the time he was two could tell me what violence happened at daycare, even if he wasn't involved. I would bet the skirmish was short and if, your daughter didn't scream or yell out, the very best of daycare teachers (and, uh, moms) can miss something. Ask your daughter and see if she remembers who did it. Tell the teachers so they can be the lookout and be diligent so you can confirm that it isn't an issue with the school.

Good luck on Monday,
S.

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Depending on how young your daughter is...I would talk to the teacher to see if she remembers anything. But keep in mind that kids are very quick and a bite can happen even if the teacher is staring at the kids. I have 4 young children of my own and have witnessed this behavior at home and in our church's nursery over the years. Kids can bite for different reasons. They may bite because their teeth hurt, they are mad, having trouble communicating how they feel, or in self defense. My son would bite when his baby sister would not let go of his hair...pure self defense. Try talking with the teacher, but keep in mind how you would feel if it was your 2 year old that bit the little one in the room. It happens sometimes when there is alot going on in the room. Good Luck with your situation and hopefully this was helpful.

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My son also is in daycare. One day when I picked him up the caregivers were all looking a little weird and when I asked what happened, they said my son bit another child. They said their policy is usually to not discuss it with parents, but to teach the children not to bit. They just told me because one of the caregivers babysits my son and she thought I would want to know. The whole drive home, my son repeated "I bit zane. That was very bad. I'm sorry, Zane." So I know they were trying to take care of it. A week later, I saw a bit shaped mark on my son's thigh. I asked if he was bitten and they said No. Honestly, I think toddlers bite, it happens quickly, and sometimes they see it happen and sometimes they don't. They told me if they have a chronic biter, they do work with the parents. So I hope this was just an isolated incident for your daughter.

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Hi,
Yes, Please take my advise and make sure that it is officially documented at the daycare and that you keep a record of the incident. I don't want to alarm you, just make you aware; my daughter was physically abused in a daycare and through the legal proceedings I learned how important it is that every little thing that happens at the daycare be documented. Everything is significant and you never know if this is an isolated incident or something that will be a recurrent problem. This can be an indicator that the other child is a problem and needs intervention or the staff are not watching the children as closely as they should. Your documentation will backup any future complaints you may or may not have. I would also take a picture of the bite mark and date it. I know it sounds over the top and paranoid, but I was very trusting and my daughter was in a very "respected" daycare with a great reputation. The daycare workers were arrested and charged, we are still going through court proceedings.

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How many children are in your daughter's class? How many teachers? Having been a teacher in a toddler room I can tell you that it is impossible to watch every child at every moment. They try their best. Also, if your daughter didn't cry or tell the teacher that another child bite her, that could be the reason that the teacher wouldn't know anything about the bite. A bite can happen very quickly in that setting, without the teacher able to do anything except appropriately discipline after the fact. I wouldn't complain unless this has happened more than once without a teacher's knowledge.

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It really depends on the age of your daughter. If she is very young (under 1), then I would definitley talk with the teacher to make sure she is monitored closer. However if it is an older child, you can ask her how it happened.

My daughter had a bite mark on her side when she was about 3 yrs old. I was changing her clothes and asked her what happened and she told me a little boy bit her (it broke the skin). In my opinion, kids bite, it happens, even the best of us can miss something like that when kids are playing.

However you should feel confident that the teacher is aware of when a child gets injured. You can ask if she knew about it (NOTHING to get upset over, but good to have communication with the teacher).

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