Birthday Etiquette - Cleveland,OH

If the younger siblings can't come, then I guess you're thinking the moms should drop their 5 year olds off and not stay for the party? My oldest is three, so don't know if i'd be willing to drop her off and trust in the supervision provided. I'm thinking we wouldn't go at all if I couldn't bring baby sister. As for activities not being age appropriate, the younger one's simply won't participate in things that are too advanced. I don't really see an issue there.

I agree with Lynn M. I wouldn't take my 4 1/2 year old and drop them off at someone's house for a party unless I knew them VERY well. I would stay which would mean most likely that I would have to bring her sibling with me, unless I could find someone to watch my other kids which is not always a possibility. I personally always allow siblings at the parties that I have for my kids - the more the merrier!

Don't invite them. I didn't invite siblings to my daughters fourth birthday party, and I called it a "big girls party" so that people kind of got the idea. I only put the big girls names on the invitation. It shouldn't be a big deal, but if you're worried about one particular famly not getting the hint, call the mom and explain that you feel bad that you can't invite the little ones, but it's going to be more big girl activities. I'm sure they'll understand.

**Edit** I also have a younger daughter and I didn't have her there, I made other arrangements for her. I told the other mom's that my little one wouldn't be there either.

Unfortunately you'll need to include the siblings. Because 5 is still young parents won't leave their kids alone with someone they don't know. You'll find that your daughter won't mind. Make sure to keep the party short and sweet and maybe have a craft for the smaller kids that isn't complicated.

I always include siblings. It is not that much extra effort, they usually entertain themselves if they are younger, and it is really appreciated by the other parents. If it is a pay for each child place then most people usually just pay seperately for the sibling that was not on the invitation. It depends on how well we know the child if we bring both kids or not. At that age we are not really dropping them off and leaving so at least in our neighboorhood the more the merrier seems to be the prevailaing attitude.

I agree, it's tricky, especially when you're all used to spending so much time together with siblings and all. My daughter just turned 3 and little siblings were at her party too, but I'm not sure I'll want that next year.

I would suggest telling the parents that you'll have lots of "big kid activities" planned, and if possible, it might be better to keep the little ones at home with another parent or family member...?

Good luck!

If the mom is staying to look after the younger sibling, I think its fine. It may be a good idea to explain the the parent that the younger sibling is invited however the activities are all geared around 5 year olds. My 10 month old is always invited to my 4 year old's parties if the inviter knows the baby.
Hope this helps!

I once had a preschool party for my son at a Chuck-E-Cheese kinda place, and I had to pay per guest. I had three little siblings show up, as well as a big sister and a cousin! I was very annoyed, as I had to pay for them, feed them, etc, and they didn't even know my child! So after that I always suggest not inviting the younger sibs, although most of the time they come anyway. Since your daughter knows them, you might address the invites in the older kid's name, but mention that siblings are welcome with a parent but an RSVP is requested. Then maybe have an alternative craft or activity while the big kids are doing their thing. Remember that a toddler or young preschooler doesn't understand a game having one winner, and crafts can be deadly when small pieces are involved. Good luck and tell us what you decide and how it goes.

Unless they are family then, NO, ONLY the children that are her age. You wouldn't want to exclude a cousin, just because they're younger or older. You have enought to do without trying to entertain kids of all ages. This will take away from YOU enjoying your daughter's birthday party.

I would say on the invitation--due to space limitations, only the stated child can attend or something like that. You don't want people just dropping by with all of their kids. Or you could say something about doing crafts that are meant for ages 4 and up. Please no siblings. Good luck!

M

I think it is appropriate to invite the younger sibs that she knows and plays with, however just state on the invitation that if kids under 4 plan to attend, that the parents need to be present, otherwise, over 4, the kids can be dropped off... something like that. The younger ones may not even come, but if they do... their parents will be there to help them/you out.

Include a note that says "siblings are welcome however crafts and games are geared towards 4-6 year olds" and then only put the older child on the invitation.

Unless a party is at a place where you pay by the person, I've found most people automatically bring younger siblings. The moms stay with the younger sibling to keep them entertained. The big kid activities are kind of irrelevant to them. If you're ok w/ people dropping their 4.5 year olds off, I'd say that in the invitation. Otherwise, people have to have one parent at the party and one parent (if there are two) with the sibling(s) which isn't always easy. I'd be cautious about having too many kids dropped off though at this age. I had a party like that and thought it wouldn't be a big deal but 4.5 is still pretty young (even 6) and it was a lot of work to run the party and attend to all these kids w/out their mothers there. In our area, I think a lot of the mothers come with the sibling to get to know each other too... And I'm not sure I would have been that comfortable dropping my daughter at a party unless it was small when she was only 4.5. I'm fine w/ playdates but a fairly large party w/ only 2 adults might have worried me a bit - not that she'd get hurt but that she'd need attention of some sort.

As long as all the kids you want to invite are the same age, then just invite the kids in her class. I have had four kids and I have never expected anyone to include my other kids. It's not fair to that parent.