As many of you know my sittuation I am renting in a town thats more expensive because they have full day K and my daughter misses the cut off in every other town by 2 days so as she finishes K I am stuck with the decision of should I move yet again after only being in this home for a year? Or do I stay here for a few more years and then move so she isnt moved around much. The area I'm in now is a rich area. To give you an idea. I rent a tiny cottage for 1400 a month thats 2 bedrooms (we use it as 3 and use the 2nd living room area for our bedroom so my daughter can have the 2nd bedroom as a playroom, but there is no closets-it is set up like an apartment- we share living area with our kitchen table...)) if we ever wanted to get a bigger place the next rental being a 3 bedroom would go from 1400 to 2500-3300...big diference. I wish I could afford this area for good. So I know there is no way to stay in this area for my daughters entire school career. So my question is do I move again into an area I know I am able to stay in for years to come before she enters 1st grade, or stay in my current home until it is too tiny and we have to move to another district when shes in 3rd or 4th grade?
opinions?
I have a 3rd grader. He is very entrenched with his friends, activities, sports and this community, in general. It would be very hard to have him switch schools at this point. Yes, he's "live" but keep in mind it gets harder with every friend they make, sport they play, group the join, etc.
I vote the sooner the better.
Yeah, I know those prices.
IMO, if you can plan it, move at a 'break point' so she's the new kid with all the other kids that are feeding into the school at that point from other schools. We moved a lot and even within the same district my sister fell behind in reading between 2nd and 3rd grades and my mom had to tutor her to get her caught up. It was hard. I came into my middle school in 6th grade, which in that district was the 2nd year. It was not as difficult when I went from 4th to 5th when 5th was the "new kids on the block". 6th was a terrible year for M.. I'd also make any changes before middle school, if possible. It's hard to come into the middle of middle school.
You don't have to plan now for her entire school career. You never know what might happen in a year or two or five. Maybe you get a better job or your financial situation improves. Maybe you can luck into a less expensive house in that district.
Do what you can to give her the best education next year. Worry about 3rd and 4th grade when that time rolls around.
Move now. Being military we've moved around a lot. If you can move to a decent area now you can save money and your daughter will be in ONE school from now on. Believe M., it can be hard to be the new kid and the older the child is the harder it can be to switch. Why keep dumping money into a rental that you know you're going to move out of sooner or later and is killing your pocketbook. Imagine what you could do with the money you'd be saving in a larger, less expensive rental in a good area. You don't need to be in a "rich" area. As long as it's safe and the schools are good it doesn't matter where you live. Move this summer.
K. B
mom to 5 including triplets
(ages 25, 16, 7, 7, and 7)
As long as you are sure you have to move I say move now! As she is in school longer she builds friendships that will be hard to break and it may be harder for her to make friends in her new location because established groups and friendships have formed.
You are in a good position to move now. In first grade, you are still in a position to help her make friends - it's still appropriate for you to call other moms and set up play dates for kids she is interested in know better. You will be in a much better position to HELP her make new friends in 1st grade. Once she is in 3rd or 4th grade, it's no longer appropriate for you to call other moms and set up play time. They need to do it on their own.
Here is what I would do. Move this summer. As soon as school starts, get the student directory with all the names/addresses/phone numbers of the kids in the school (even if they haven't published a new one get it for the previous year). A while after school starts and she has started to get to know the kids better, start calling for play dates. This is how you can help her adjust to her new school. For her current friends, offer to be pen pails if you are moving too far away, or make an effort to drive to them a few times to help her adjust.
Good luck!
Move now before she gets overly attached to her friends in the current school. If you move now the kids she goes to school with next year will most likely be with her through high school.
I'd move. If your goal was to get her started in K, she did. Let her move now so she can make the friends she'll have permanently and get yourselves settled where you'll be happy. Perfect sacrifice for one year, but I don't know if I could live like that indefinately. Like ripping off a band aid -
I don't have anything to base it on, but next year we may be facing the same dillema.
We want to move, my youngest will have completed K, but do we stay one more year, or move . . . I am thinking we'll J. move:)
Everyone seems to think bigger is better...but sometimes its J. bigger. Why do you assume that you will need a bigger house in a few years? As kids get bigger their toys get smaller. You won't need the play room soon. (Unless you are having more kids). Even then, can you rearrange, or better organize your stuff to fit (or even get rid of some stuff). I think the more important questions are...are you happy in the house, are you happy in the town? Will you save more money/be able to give your daughter more opportunities in a new town?
If you are able to I would move now. Later on she will have built stronger bonds with friends and it will be more difficult to move away. But you have to do what ever is best for your family.
Good luck and God Bless!!!
you can get way too caught up in choreographing years that aren't here yet. yes, it's good to look ahead, but you have no way of knowing what opportunities and challenges life has to bring. there also should be other things factoring into your decision. do you love living in the area? are there economic and intellectual advancement opportunities for you as well as your daughter? what is the job situation like there? if you did move, where could replicate the good things about your current area?
if you shut your mind to any possibility of being able to live somewhere you love for long, you will surely make that come true.
plan for the next two years, and re-evaluate as things come up as you go along.
khairete
S.
I think kids are able to transition to new schools easier during the elementary years. When they hit middle school age that's when it's harder to pull them away from friends that they are bonded with and such.
Having bigger digs when she is older and starting to have sleepovers and parties would make sense.
I'd stay with the easier to afford spot for now, nothing worse than trying to survive somewhere above your means. Expensive rent or mortgage can really be a stressor.
I agree w/ the other moms, the sooner the better. Move now, get yourself established, etc. My child is in first grade and this is the first year that school friends are really becoming important to her. By 3rd or 4th grade, it will be more difficult to start over. Not as bad as moving in 6th or 7th, mind you, but if you know it's inevitable and the cost is dinging you, I'd J. move on to greener pastures. Good luck!
My vote is to move now.
It's easier to find something now than to wait. You move during the summer so that she goes to school the first day with all the rest of the kids. She gets to know them and has friends for the next 4-7 years.
The longer you wait the harder it gets. It's not fun being the new kid in school after school starts.
Find somewhere that you can afford and go from there.
Good luck to you.
The other S.
Without even reading the rest of your post I will have to say a huge BEFORE!!!! I made the mistake of waiting and now am stuck in a school district that is not that great because my kids have friends and don't want to move (thye are in 2nd and 4th) I would feel terrible if I made them move anyhow and it was traumatic for them so we aren't going anywhere. Plus, I have made friends with many of the parents/administrators and would hate to have to start from scratch somewhere else. So, I advise you to move now or regret it later when your daughter has to make all new friends-this is esp hard for girls BTW b/c by fourth grade many of them are well on their way to being mean girls.
I would look at the schools to start. How do they compare academically? Will she get a better education in one or the other, or are they comparable? That would be my first main focus. I would want my child where ever she would get the best education. A good start can help her for the rest of her life. Second, does she make friends easily? We J. moved. My daughter is in third grade. She had no problems making friends. She does so fairly easily. I may have reconsidered if the opposite were true. Now for you. Do you gain by moving? Can you get a better house for better rent? Will it be putting you in a situation where you benefit? What if you stay where you are? Are you sure you will out grow the house? Try to consider all the factors involved, then make a decision. Good luck. :)
