Behavior in a Nine Month Old....

Updated on February 03, 2008
I.M. asks from Carlisle, PA
10 answers

I have a really bright nine month old.Recently she has become increasingly clingy and FREAKS out when I leave the room or if she has to go to someone other than myself. She's throwing tantrums like a two year old does, and she's really becoming attached to objects.And if you take it away from her,she goes NUTS! It weems like she's behaving the way I've seen some two year olds behave.Is this normal? I thought they go through this stage a little later in the game.HELP....

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C.H.

answers from Philadelphia on

:) I feel for you, but you're not alone. That behavior usually kicks in around 8 months of age. Hang in there! It will pass!

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J.J.

answers from Atlanta on

Hi I.,

My 9 month old is the EXACT same way!! I can't put him down or walk away from him for one minute without the waterworks starting. He's walking now so he follows me everywhere. I go to the bathroom, he's right beside me. I'm doing the laundry he is attached to my leg (literally). Even when I'm on the floor trying to get him to play, he's right on top of me. He loves the remotes, our cell phones and key. When I take them away, he actually kicks his feet and jerks his body around and screams. I too expected to deal with this later on down the line. I know this sounds terrible, but I have gotten so annoyed that I just let him scream and walk away. I continue to talk to him and of course he follows me, but I want him to understand that mommy can't always hold him and more importantly, he cannot get what he wants by crying and/or throwing tantrums. It's working because though he hasn't stopped completely, it's not as bad.

Not sure if it's normal, but you're definitely not alone! Let me know if anything works for you!!

~J.

1 mom found this helpful
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L.N.

answers from Pittsburgh on

seperation anxiety, my kids went thru it at that age tool. it passes. keep your head up and stress down, lol.

God bless.

B.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

At her age she is just begining to realize that things "go away". And if she can't see it then it's gone forever. It's just a stage that all babies go through. Try playing peek-a-boo with her. Try it different ways too. Like the hand towel over a toy etc... have fun...she'll get through this fairly quickly.

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C.H.

answers from Philadelphia on

It sounds what your daughter is going through is typical at 9 or 10 months. I have a 9 month old and everyone keeps telling me that she will start getting clingy and crying when I leave the room. She's kinds opposite though b/c has this reaction more when my husband or I walk back into a room after being gone for a significant amount of time. I would not worry as with most things in babyland...this too will pass. I know from seeing my siblings with my many neices and nephews you'll have to decide as a parent whether you will give into her and go pick her up, or tell her you are leaving and you'll see her soon and then leave. I'm not sure anyone can make that decision for you or tell you what is best for you and your daughter. Good luck!

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K.S.

answers from Harrisburg on

Separation anxiety develops at around 8 months of age, and so this is completely normal!! Unfortunately it is very difficult for parents to deal with!! Especially when you need a break from your kid(s)...I have a ten month old who cries when I leave the room, and I just try to reassure her that I will be right back, and she usually crawls after me!! I have a two year old to care for too, so I can't give into her every wimper...it gets better with time, especially as they develop more language skills and are able to verbalize their needs. Until then, try helping your daughter to do this. I know a lot of moms who have tried baby signing (sign language) and have found this to really work for kiddos that are easily frustrated. Good Luck

T.S.

answers from Pittsburgh on

ring

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R.H.

answers from Allentown on

I.,
I was just reading the other day about this kind of behavior. (my daughter is 8 months) The article, which I wish I could remember from where, said that as a child learns object permanance they become attached and my display symptoms of seperation anxiety (the tantrum when you leave). I would say it sounds completely normal, and remember... this too shall pass! Tomorrow she'll be on to something new :-)

R.

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J.R.

answers from Allentown on

This is very normal behavior for babies between 9-11 months old (and again somewhere around 18 months).

I would sometimes put my kids in a sling and just tote them around until they got bored with that. A couple of my kids I didn't even leave in the church nursery at this stage. They do grow through it.

I definitely suggest giving kids warnings about changes--"in 2 minutes you are going to have to give mommy that toy" or "mommy needs to let Aunt Sara take care of you in 2 minutes." (longer warnings for older kids, and a count down is good) so that they can prepare for transitions. Try not to let your daughter see any anxiety you have about leaving her with other care givers...but as I indicated above, I do suggest trying to minimize the number of other care givers during this phase.

Hugs!

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R.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Hi, My son had troubles like that, and I relied on "Raising a Happy, Unspoiled Child" by Burton L White. I got my copy on eBay as it is out of print--

My son is over 2, and we HAVE NO TERRIBLE TWO behavior at all.

I can't recommend Dr White enough!

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