Bedwetting - Denton,TX

Updated on January 14, 2011
D.W. asks from Denton, TX
14 answers

My 4 1/2 yo son is still wetting the bed every night (sometimes 3 times a night!) I have never used pull ups b/c I thought that might prolong the bedwetting. I feel like the issue is getting worse instead of better. We usually take him to the bathroom before bed and get him up to go again before we go to sleep. This use to work and sometimes he would even come to me in the morning to go. For the last 6 months though he is usually wet before we go to bed, if I get up and check him in the middle of the night he is almost always wet and then again in the morning. I can't keep up with my laundry and he does not want to wear a "diaper" (pull-up). Any suggestions would be so appreciated- I am clueless on how to help him!

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So What Happened?

Thanks so much for all the responses. My son loves Buzz and Woody so we will go buy some special nighttime underwear tomorrow and let it be! Luckily I did buy a mattress cover and many waterproof pads- so our mattress is fine. (my washing machine is probably ready for the break as much as I am!) Somehow it helps hearing from other Mom's that not every issue needs to be resolved today- so thank you all for your caring Mom responses!

For those who mentioned it- I did check with my pediatrician and he is on a laxative for constipation- that issue seems to be resolved w/o any effect on the bedwetting.

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S.O.

answers from Amarillo on

My son never wanted to put pull-ups b/c he consider them as diapers....well, about a month ago, I bought him the overnight pull ups with Buzz Lightyear and Woody & he loves them!!

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C.P.

answers from Jackson on

My son was almost 8 before he finally stopped wetting the bed. Katrina was right: it is a physical skill, not mental! I know how frustrating it is to keep washing all the bedding! We finally started encouraging him to wear Goodnights. He liked it because then he didnt have to worry about it anymore or be embarrased because he wet the bed. I think that was key for him. He could discreetly throw away his pullup and no one would know it had been wet. Finally he said he was ready to try not wearing them anymore and he has not wet the bed since! What we did at the beginning when he didn't want to wear the pullup was just explain to him that it was not a diaper, it was for big boys who sometimes have accidents at night. We explained that it would make him feel better to be dey and comfortable and not have to wake up all wet. This too shall pass before you know it! Good luck!

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D.H.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter had this problem when she was younger and I noticed it only happened when she slept in footed pajamas or in socks. We changed to bare feet and she stopped! Every once in a while now, it will happen but very infrequent. Try it! it can't hurt! A friend of mine, who's son is a few months older than my daughter, was having trouble with this also, and when they changed to bare feet, it all stopped for them, too!

S.L.

answers from New York on

my five and half yr old still occasionally wets the bed, no worries. but three times a night would make me wonder ? does he go a lot during the day? if so call the dr. is he drinking more liquids later in the day? if so Push liquids at breakfast and mid morning snack and lunch. then offer smaller amounts.
My son has a loft bed -hard to change sheets in the middle of the night so I put a mattress pad then a fitted sheet then another mattress pad then another fitted sheet. so I can just pull off the top layer

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W.L.

answers from Dallas on

several possibilities, is he a sound sleeper? He may sleep so hard that the urge does not wake him. I it could be a medical problem, have you discussed it with your doctor? I had the same problem as a child and after surgery I was fine. I know you are exhausted and frustrated, it is a period you will get through and you will get sleep again but do check with your doctor it will help both of you. Good luck

P.M.

answers from Tampa on

I still have my 5 y/o in diapers. Sometimes she wakes up dry, but most times she's wet. There is no shame in this... some children's body take longer to get in control of sleepytime milestones. Not all children CAN or WILL wake up when they have to go to the bathroom when they are sleeping.

My pediatrician said they do not worry about overnight bed wetting until the child turns 8 y.o.

Do what is best for your child... offer pull ups or a diaper and say this is to help you keep your bed clean and to help you hold it if you have to go potty when you are sleeping. If he still refuses, get one of those waterproof slips that go on top of the sheets.

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M.H.

answers from Dallas on

I would force the overnight pull-ups. Tell him that you 2 will work on a solution together but pull-ups at night until a solution is found. I would also cut off liquids at 6:00. I had this problem with my daughter and she said that she was "dying" of thirst, and often ate a snack or dinner after this time and needed a drink. Post-6:00 drinks could only be yogurt drinks. This helped ALOT and the problem was solved in 2 weeks. Of course every child is different, but see if it helps. Good luck. (I've also heard of a parent offering $$ for every morning the child is dry...a quarter? a dollar? whatever it takes and that you can afford.)

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K.S.

answers from Dallas on

Both of my boys wet the bed until they were about ten years old, we tried everything...I suggest though that you DO NOT make him feel bad or tell him it's his fault for not getting up to go to the bathroom. He may have a weak bladder or just sleeps really sound. My oldest son still had accasional accidents until he was 12 and it totally embarrassed him. If you must make him wear pull ups at night I suggest that you let it be his secret so he wont feel like people think he's a baby, and let him wear it under pajamas.

A.S.

answers from Spokane on

My son is 8 1/2 and he has the same problem. I asked the doc about it and besides James just sleeping too heavily to wake up, he also says there's a hormone that controls urine production. Everything slows down which is why adults can sleep through the night without wetting ourselves. There's no set age for this hormone to kick in which is why ages are all over the board as to when a child might stop wetting the bed. James was 5 the first time I asked the doc about it but I was told not to start becoming concerned until they were 7. At that time they take a closer look to see what the problem may be. It was the second time (this year) that I asked about it that I was informed about the hormone. Also, for the older children there is medication but that should really be the last resort.

James has a special waterproof pad under him so if he leaks his sheets aren't totally soaked. We just remove the pad and place another one under him. There's also a heavy plastic cover over the mattress so it isn't ruined. And he wears cloth pull-ups to bed. We still wake him up at set times during the night and his body finally seems to be getting the idea.

James is just like your son. A really heavy wetter and a deep sleeper. So I know how really frustrating this is. It doesn't help either that my older daughter (almost 6) also has a problem too but her's is physical from some other issues that she had. I'm so thankful my other two don't wet the bed.

Check out the Bedwetting Store (http://www.bedwettingstore.com/). The doc recommended it to me and I've gotten some great stuff from it. You mentioned your son doesn't want to wear a pull-up. This site has some special underpants that look like briefs so that may help. Oh, and this site also has the special alarms that you could use. We tried it and it didn't work for us but only because we received ours used and it had helped several children so I think it was just worn out. We plan on getting another alarm this summer when school is out if he still has any problems. Good luck!

K.A.

answers from San Diego on

Night time dryness is a physical skill, not mental. Some children take longer to physically mature enough to either hold it all night or be able to wake up on their own to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. It took both my boys until they were close to 6 years old before we had complete dryness at night. It's not unheard of for it to last until 8 or 9. Using a pull up does nothing to prolong nighttime bed wetting. Bladder maturity dictates nighttime bed wetting.
We have a waterproof mattress pad on the bed to protect the mattress itself. Personally we kept them in pullups until they were dry every night for a good month and then we never looked back, they haven't had an accident since. Like already mentioned, you may want to try "Goodnights" or something else. Don't call them diapers. We never called them that, they were big boy pants or pullups...Never Diapers. "Diapers were for babies" "pullups are for big kids". I couldn't take the mess and laundry, I had zero patience for it so pullups were a necessity.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

He is a child, children don't always develop that brain body connection according to our plans, he is the child, tell him until he is older and can stay dry all night he has to wear a pull up. Then put one on him and give yourself a break from so much laundry.

My 12 year old grandson still wets the bed and has been to a couple of pediatric urologists, nothing is wrong, he just doesn't have that ability yet. They told them to not limit his fluids, it would make no difference, he could just get dehydrated and that could make things even worse. They told him if he is still doing this in 6 months they might start him on some medicine but that that is a last resort. They asked about the alarms and the doc just laughed and asked them if they really wanted bells to wake them up repeatedly every night, the only thing he felt alarms did was make the whole family sleep deprived and they really did nothing to help. The body is ready when the body is ready.

One thing they check for is constipation. The fullness presses on the intestines/colon and put extra pressure on the tiny bladder and pushes the pee out once the kid is relaxed in REM sleep.

I dealt with my daughter wetting the bed until she was 8 or 9 and I didn't handle it very well. I was up all night changing sheets and waking her up to shower every time. I had ruined mattresses and box springs. The pee soaked through all the way on to the carpet. So I know what it's like to deal with this. Now that I am raising some of my grandkids I am much more understanding. I just buy the pull ups and they put one on every night. If they are wet in the morning they put their pull up in the trash.

I could just be like I used to be and say I'm the boss and you're going to do it this way but I hope I have learned something along the way. Kids develop differently and it's up to me to handle their stages how I want. I chose to be more understanding but still pragmatic. I have no desire to wash pee sheets and blankets every day and making the kids wear pull ups is one choice I get to make.

We use the overnight pull ups with Buzz Lightyear and Woody on them, they are in a dark blue package and he has never peed out of them, not once and he has been in overnight pulls since he was 2ish.

Our 7 yr. old girl wears the same brand overnight pull ups but for girls, they are dark red and have Disney Princesses on them, and we call them princess panties. She wets more than the 4 year old but it is still handled discreetly and she just takes a pull up with her when she spends the night with friends or family, she even takes one to the gym when they have the over night party twice a year called Twilight Tumble. She thinks it's no big deal because we have made it no big deal.

It comes down to who the adult is and how it is phrased when telling them they are going to wear one regardless of their desires.

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L.I.

answers from Dallas on

This really isn't uncommon at this age and even older. My daughter is about to turn 6 and still wets the bed. We let her sleep in her underwear for awhile, but it just got so messy having to change the sheets all the time and having pee everywhere every morning! I could tell she was discouraged with herself as well. I decided to give in to the pull-ups. It was the best thing I ever did. I got the Goodnights brand. We don't call them diapers or pull-ups. We call them her "night time underwear". I think this helped her make the transition without a hitch. If I accidently call it a diaper she even corrects me and tells me its not a diaper - it night time underwear! It makes her feel like she's not a baby and that there's nothing to be ashamed of. I also cut off her liquid intake at night. If she is super thirsty I will let her have 1 sip of my water, but I don't get her her own glass. Looking forward to the day she doesn't need them anymore!

B.C.

answers from Dallas on

Have you tried the goodnights? They're not "diapers". They're made for bigger kids and soft. Not like the plastic-y pullups.

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A.K.

answers from Dallas on

Every Child is different. Save yourself and him a lot of stress and buy disposable big boy pants.
They have some that look like boxers, and others with sharks on them that look just like underwear. Auto ship from Amazon makes them cheaper than Wal-mart.

He will grow out of it, but adding the stress of wet and stinky sheets, along with the shame and embarrassment, is not going to shorten the duration.

Shrug it off, encourage him during the day, keep up with potty reminders before bed (omitting the drama and reasoning), and get that boy some pull-ups!

I even had expensive, custom made, super absorbent, very cool looking underwear and boxer briefs made for one of my sons, and they work as good as his sheets...meaning not at all. NOTHING absorbs big boy night potties like disposables.
Call them overnight pants, big boy pants, anything cool sounding, cover them with his daytime underwear or a new cool type of underwear, but, I'm telling you,
nature has to take it's course, and you have to make you and him as comfortable as possible until then.

It may take another month, or until puberty, but it's perfectly natural and normal and nothing to stress about.

I have 5 kids, 4 of them boys, and the teenager (since he was 5) and 2 yr old are the only ones dry through the night, so I know what I'm talking about.

Hang in there!! :)

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