Bed Wetting - 6 1/2 Year Old

Updated on December 27, 2008
C.S. asks from Fairfax, VA
15 answers

My 6 1/2 year old daughter has always been a very deep sleeper. We've been patiently waiting for her bladder to develop enough to get her through the night without wetting but it hasn't happened. She has no fluids after 6:30pm, urinates twice before going to bed and we've been waking her up the last month before we go to bed around 10:00pm. Recently she has been wetting before 10:00pm without waking up on her own so we're planning to wake her up an hour after she goes to sleep to see if that works. Any suggestions?

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K.G.

answers from Seattle on

Poor girl. Do you think a pull-up can contain the pee through the night so she can get a good nights sleep and she should outgrow it around 8 or so. Oh and a good mattress pad that is water resistant and washable. My son is 7 and still wears pull-ups. His brothers and father were the same way, we just don't make an issue of it and don't has to limit his drinks at night.

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T.J.

answers from Seattle on

Bed wetting isn't always a deep sleep problem, sometimes it is a nervous system issue. I've worked in chiropractic for 13 years and have seen every kid that came in for bedwetting completely stop! If you don't have a family chiropractor you can call Pacific Chiropractic in Lynnwood ###-###-#### and tell them T. sent you, good luck! :)

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L.V.

answers from Corvallis on

Hi C.,
I had one like yours, even when I woke her ad helped her to the toilet she wasn't really awake, and sometimes almost fell off. She offered to sleep in the bathtub, but I always vetoed that. She started to be very embarassed about it, especially as sleep-overs began when she was about 8. We just used pull-ups, which worked most of the time, so long as I made sure I had the right size by weight.
When a sleep-over occurred, I'd call the mom in charge and explain the situation privately, though my daughter knew I'd do it. My request was that she have a private place to change, and that her things wouldn't be gone through by the other girls. Also that the mom in charge be prepared for disposal. They were all gracious, and she was never embarassed at a party, though she was anxious each time that her secret would be discovered.
Finally, right as she turned 10, it stopped. It took a month to be sure, but there hasn't been a problem since and she is 16 now.
Her sister stopped earlier, but did have a couple of breakthrough episodes later.
There are gadgets out there, but the bottom line is that she needs to outgrow it, and she will eventually. When I realized that my efforts to help her learn were adding to her sense of failure and anxiety, I stopped all the efforts and just helped her stay clean and dry. I had always told her that it was ok and that she would outgrow it, I doubled up on that, and treated it as a natural part of growing up. I also smoothed her way socially, as I said. She took it well and by 9yo was philosophical about it. We were both happy when she out grew it, but it had no longer become an issue to her.
That is my advice, support her until she grows out of it, and don't let her think that she is abnormal.
L.

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S.L.

answers from Portland on

Hi C., Yes, wake her up about an hour to to 1 1/2 hours after she has gone to bed, take turns so as not to tire yourself out, she will have time to relax the body muscles, but a good thin g too I know works is for you to purchase the goodnites pull-ups they are for older children, only you as the parents and her need too know, they work wonders keeping the bed dry and that half the battle, also be sure that she is warm at night, as when they fall asleep they get cold even while they are covered, see that she has warm pjs. last but not least reward her every time she has a dry one on when waking up for the day,she will find it a fun game to do as she will be strengthening her bladder muscles to awaking her as the mind will train her to control the need to get up, after a while drop the reward and replace it with more affection and praise while helping her make her bed. She will then want to please you more as she takes on that responsibility. Have fun, have patience, they grow up fast, mother of three boys youngest twelve now. S.,

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S.S.

answers from Portland on

My oldest son, now 17yrs old and probably my brother both had a problem with bed wetting. They too were deep sleepers. We found out through testing; most people fall in and out of REM sleep to Deep sleep 4 - 8 times a night. My son would fall from REM Sleep and into Deep sleep only 1 time. He was given a specail sleeping pad that would set off an alarm when he wet the bed, however, he stayed asleep. We would have to every 2 hours wake him up, wash his face and walk him around to get his body used to going in and out of deep sleep. It was hard, but very much worth it. This also, cured his sleep walking and took the dark circles out from around his eyes. They said, this type of deep sleep does not make them more alert, they need the REM Sleep, it keeps their minds active. Oh, and we kept him in pull ups till he reduced the accidents, he couldn't help himself so we didn't want to make things h*** o* him. They had just come out with the larger sizes, thank goddness.

Good Luck,
S.

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M.S.

answers from Portland on

I know of three bed-wetters. One that had severe emotional trauma that resulted in a regression back to bed wetting, and two that never mastered staying dry all night to begin with. All three made it to 10 years old before the pediatrician recommended any action. One tried the medication that did not work. All three eventually tried the alarm that goes in the underwear. Within a matter of a couple weeks, two of them (including the one with emotional trauma) were dry all night every night. The third one was just stubborn and when the alarm would go off, he would rip it out and go back to sleep.
So, if your daughter really wants to work on it, I recommend the alarm method.

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S.B.

answers from Spokane on

One of my daughters had this problem at the same age. It turned out to be caused by a blockage in one of her tubes going from her kidney to her bladder. It was cleared up with the right medication and she hasn't had a problem since- she's 14 now. I would just check with a doctor if you haven't already to rule out anything like that. Good luck.

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H.M.

answers from Portland on

My niece is the same age and has the same issues. My SIL has to wake her up about an hour after my niece falls asleep to take her to the bathroom. If this doesn't happen she will wet he bed. This seems to be the one thing that works. She has had a dry bed for about 4 months now.

Sounds to me you are doing all the right things.

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J.V.

answers from Seattle on

Try taking her to the chiropractor. It worked for my kids and I have 6.

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R.B.

answers from Medford on

Just one more thought. I know of two cases of late bedwetters who found it to be related to a food allergy. My husband's cousin would wet the bed when he had milk (I don't know if it was all dairy products or just milk) and I have a friend whose son wets the bed (and has behavioral issues) when he has corn of any kind. Just something to consider!

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T.F.

answers from Eugene on

This is such a sensitive subject for me personally - I wet the bed until I was about 13ish. I went through so much because my parents didn't know what was the reason why I would wet the bed. I will never do what my parents did to me because I wet the bed to my son if he is a bed wetter. I could imagine that it would be frustrating...I was so terrified as a child when I wet the bed. Let's just say it wasn't fun and there was nothing that I could do about it. Anyway - You could have her help clean up her own mess. Like for example, making her own bed, taking care of her stuff when she has accidents. Give her the responsibility of it. I hope that you can get through this. Again, Please be patient with her - she will grow out of it.

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A.J.

answers from Portland on

My 6 1/2 son also wets the bed occasionally, but I just use pull ups and have him shower in the morning. We limit night time drinks and make sure he uses the toilet, but still he wets the bed. My pediatrician recommended the alarm, but I am not ready for that yet and am hoping he will outgrow it. My mother-in-law told me that when she woke up her bed wetters at night it always back fired and their internal clocks would tell their bodies to pee at that time each night and she would have to wake them earlier and earlier, that could be what is happening to your daughter. If you really want to train her bladder, talk to her pediatrician about the alarm and to rule out any other medical problems. Sometimes bed wetting is a symptom of a medical problem. Good luck. Let us know how things turn ou.

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D.T.

answers from Portland on

I agree with the person who suggested you take your daughter to the doctor. It is best to rule out anything medical. Your doctor might have some more suggestions. I have never thank god had bedwetting problem with my children, even the heavy sleeper (he would sleep through a bomb going off right next to him). They make alarms for the child that wakes them up when they wet the bed. I would go online and look for a parent forum about bedwetting. Like here you are going to get lots of practical info.

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J.C.

answers from Seattle on

C., I promise- she will grow enough to handle this. My grandson ( whose father and grandfather both had the same issue - sound sleep - late dry-at-night) -- was 8 before he was reliably dry- though it had been tapering off- it's a tough one- but it does happen.

Blessings-
J.

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G.B.

answers from Portland on

From my experience this is usually a sign of a food allergy.

My son and a friend who would sleep over a lot both had night troubles. We kept it really light the boys would just wash bedding in the morning and no one was made to feel bad.

One day I was talking with my brother about his sons and he volunteered to talk to the boys.

It was a great conversation. I told them that at 30 he had only wet the bed once since he was married. He explained how he cut out all drinks after dinner and that he peed twice before he went to bed. He said if he woke during the night he always got up to pee. He also told them that if he ate something he was allergic to he had more trouble.

We cut both boys off of milk for a while and they could be night dry.

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