12 answers

Bed Rest - Franklin, TN

I am 25 weeks pregnant with twins, a boy and a girl. This week I started having contractions and after 24 hours in the hospital, we got them to stop, but now I am on bed rest for (likely) the remainder of my pregnancy.
We are taking it very seriously and I am not allowed up for anything but going to the bathroom. Luckily, I work from home from my laptop, so I'll be able to continue to do that, and my husband is an independant contractor whose only job out right now is with my dad, so he's able to stay home and do all the things I used to do, plus bring me anything I need. I have a good support system of friends and family who will be coming out to help us, and although I am already getting restless, I fully intend on following doctors orders and staying put.
I was just wondering two things; are there any tips on me not going crazy sitting here on the couch? And also, any ideas on ways I can show my husband how much I appreciate him taking such good care of me and our 3 year old daughter? I really don't want him to get burned out, and would like to make sure that he still gets his time to himself, and feels like he is not just my waiter/maid. I have already decided to leave him alone about the housework and dishes and so forth, and just let him do them his way and in his time (the last thing I want to be is a nag).
Any suggestions would be appreciated. I will be here, not going anywhere :)
Thanks,
K.

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More Answers

Bed rest is hard I was on it for 7 weeks with my first and 4 weeks with my second. My laptop saved my sanity I think. Your husband knows you are trying to keep your babies in, baking as long as possible and he should understand that you are doing a hard job and he needs to help out and he should not resent you so dont worry to much about him right now. Make sure you tell him please and thank you and give him kisses and stuff like that and like you said dont nit pick about the little things that need done. Let the dishes and laundry go and let the dust settle its ok also except help from family and friends and get the numbers from all the take out places in the area. although I did gain all my weight on bedrest by eating out to much LOL

1 mom found this helpful

Rent lots of movies - especially the ones that only you want to see!
I would also suggest universalclass.com where you can actually teach & earn money (would be stimulating mentally) (or even learn yourself).
Do a pregnancy blog/online baby book and/or start a scrap book - I'm sure you're little 3-yr old would love to help with a scrap book for the new babies (and would be a great way of getting her involved and prepared for what's to come).
Read up on your books & refresh your labor/birth knowledge so you can be prepared.

I'm sure you could find a wheelchair to rent or buy a cheap used one online to get around when you need to move about and get out of the house - take a family stroll in the evenings, or go to the mall/get outdoors/go to the park.

Also,
Check out this yahoo group:
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/bedrestbookbuddies/

On the thank-you side of the question... Give him a night out w/ his friends - prepare yourself w/ take-out, and movie...etc so you will have everything you need (with a relative/friend at a phone-calls notice). Or, call up some friends and play some board games/card games so you don't have to be up and about. Give a backrub in bed (relaxation is important for childbirth prep anyway, so, this is a perfect time to do your relaxation exercises).
Hmm... I think I had more suggestions for the bedrest part! :)
Main thing - try to think outside of the "i'm stuck in bed" box, and think of all the things you can do without being active - it really depends on the things he likes to do and what is available in your area.

On the "childbirth educator" suggestion side - stay low stress, do some yoga/meditation type stuff - you seem rather happy, but, you seem like you could be a little stressed that your husband is doing so much. Don't worry - this is the time where he should be doing a lot - you're growing two babies, he can handle housework.
Get lots of protein and 64-96oz of water each day. Pee a lot!!! Get your fiber!
Brush up on your breastfeeding knowledge & work out a birth plan! If you haven't already - read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth and Creating your Birth Plan by Marsden Wagner

D. B.
Childbirth Educator
www.esalibirth.com

1 mom found this helpful

When I was 5 mos pregnant with my 4th baby, my membranes broke and like you I was on strict bedrest. I had 3 other girls at the time ages 3,4 &6. I know how hard it is to not do the things momies do. I read lots of books to my girls and we played with puzzles and did "art" in my bed or on the sofa. We hired a teenager from church to help with dinner and baths. After the girls went to bed, I go to read books for myself. The worse part of being this inactive for me was when the 4th child was born, I was really weak. (I carried her 8 and 1/2 months) I was out of shape, so be prepared to feel sort of weak when your babies come.Try not to worry about the dirty dishes or whatever, your carrying these babies is most important. Your 3 yr old will enjoy the time with you. I was pregnant during the summer, so sometimes we all went outside and the girls played in sand or the sprinkler. I reclined in a lawn chair, so I could watch them. Lunch often consisted of cream cheeze and fruit and other snacks my 6 yr old could retrieve. The internet is a blessing. I hope all goes well for you!

1 mom found this helpful

Hey K.! I was on complete bedrest for 9 weeks with my youngest child, now 5 months. My poor husband did EVERYTHING - as we also had a 1 year old and a 2 year old. It was a looooooooooooong 9 weeks, to say the least - for both of us! Let's see, to keep you from going stir crazy....I worked on the laptop a lot - just emailing and surfing the web. If you don't have a family blog, that might be fun to work on. That way you can update people on how you are doing. I let my kiddos climb in bed with me and we would color and do little crafts and watch Disney movies. For your husband - I agree with not nit-picking about ANYTHING!!! You can redo and re-arrange things once you are up and about again. For now, think of it as "survival mode" - his method of doing this will just have to do. If money allows, hire a housekeeper to come in to clean every once and a while. That would help him a lot. We also had people who were kind enough to bring us meals. TAKE THE HELP if it is offered! Some people even gave us gift cards to places that you could call in a "to go" order, and my hubby picked up the food on the way home from work. Or if you could find a sitter/relative for your 3 year old for an afternoon so he could go play golf, fishing, whatever his hobby is. He needs a break too! (Trust me - he will gain a MUCH better appreciation for all that you do!)
Just remember what I had to keep reminding myself while I was on bedrest - your only job right now is to keep those babies in your belly safe and healthy. You are the only one who can do that - let other people do the rest of the stuff! Best of luck!

1 mom found this helpful

Congratulations, K.!

It may be hard to stay on bedrest now, but look at it this way, once they come,rest will be a thing of the past, so enjoy it while you can! Karen Gromada wrote a good book, "Mothering Multiples" there is also a monthly magazine called "Twins". Now is the time to read up, all those good books about childbirth and raising multiples. This is also a good opportunity to to spend some good quality one on one with your daughter, and prepare her to be a big sister. It is good to explain beforehand that babies need more time and attention, but that doesn't mean you love them more, just because you will be spending more time caring for them.
You could also use the time to make hand made Christmas presents if you can paint, knit, crochet, sew or have tlent with any other artsy media. You can start by making something nice for dh for fathers day to show him how much you appreciate his help and support. You could also hire someone (or beg a friend)to come over on fathers day weekend to cook and clean, so he can have the day off.
While on bedrest, you will not be burning as many calories as when you are up and active, but the babies still need good nutrition to keep them in there till closer to your due date. Getting enough protein is of utmost importance, but any junk foods, or "empty calories" should be avoided like the plague! And don't forget to keep your belly well oiled to minimize stretch marks.
I am really enjoying my 19 month old twin grandsons! All babies are so precious, but having two, and watching them interact, is priceless! Like when Cameron started crying, and Danny took his pacifier and stuck it in Camerons mouth! There have been many "Kodak Moments" like that.
My dd was never on bedrest, in fact she was very active while pregnant, same as before, except that she stopped playing soccer (she was on a college soccer scholarship). She had them naturally after a 10 hr labor at 35 wks. (because she wasn't eating enough protein) Cameron was head down, but Danny was tranverse, so the doc grabbed his ankles and brought him out feet first. She didn't even tear!
Good luck, enjoy your treasures!
M., CPM

1 mom found this helpful

Learn to knit. Have someone pick you up a book and some tools and yarn.

Knitting keeps many mom's from going crazy and it will help you to. Seriously. Make your babies keepsake blankets and hats and booties and start on their Christmas stockings and sweaters.

Don't feel guilty that your husband is helping out so much. It's a new normal. He's only going to get busier and busier over the next couple of years. Just say "thank you" and "you're doing a great job". It's more than you'll probably get.

Enjoy that couch. Your rear won't meet that couch again once your babies start crawling.

Watch "The Happiest Baby on the Block" DVD by David Karp. You really need to know this stuff. Silly title, really important.

Wouldn't hurt to read up on child development and breastfeeding either.

You can also watch a lot of movies and t.v. shows. Netflix is awesome and you can get a Roku box and watch them instantly.

1 mom found this helpful

K.,

Congratulations on your pregnancy with twins! I have twins who are almost 7 years old and I always tell people that my greatest accomplishment in life was carrying them full-term. I was fortunate that I was never officially on bed rest. My doctor put me on "light activity" but recommended that I stay in bed most of the time. I remember one weekend my husband and I watched an entire weekend marathon of "Trading Spaces" on TLC! You can get bored out of your head! Since you are still working from home, maybe you can line up friends to come by each day and eat lunch with you. They can just bring their own and eat at your house instead of at a fast food place. That way, you will get to see different faces and keep in touch with the people you care about. Also, I have a friend who was on bed-rest and her husband bought her a pool lounge chair so she could lay down and be outside once in a while. She said that really helped too. As for your husband....the greatest gift you can give him is two healthy babies!

1 mom found this helpful

Sorry I can't be much help in the "What-can-I-do-to-keep-from-going-crazy?" department. I've never mastered the art of being lazy, either. Doing nothing is ... well, you know what they say. The hardest part about doing nothing is that you can never take a break from it!

But, on the hubby front, believe it or not, guys love getting flowers, too! Call your local florist and tell them you want something for a guy. Explain his line of work and ask them to ornament the arrangement with little hammers and screw drivers and things like that. He probably even has a favorite flower, if you think about it. Have a friend go out and buy a bunch of blank "thinking of you" type greeting cards and postage stamps for you. Every couple of days, write a note in one, letting him know you know what a big job he is tackling and how much you appreciate him for it. And it's amazing how the unexpected little things like that can make such a big impression.

1 mom found this helpful

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