Babysitter - Time off Out of Her Control

I do in-home daycare/preschool and if I take any time off, I do not expect to be paid for it. If the children are out, that is out of MY control, so do expect to be paid for that time, but ME taking time out, even if it's because someone died, I do not expect to be paid for that time.

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Am I missing something here? Why do you have to pay her when she is not available? It's one thing if you bail on her, but not when she bails on you.

Why do you have to pay her if she is closed? I don't get it?

I'd strongly suggest to her that she needs to get a sub.

Also, it is NOT right that you are paying when she isn't sitting. I'd demand to NOT do that if I were you.

MAN, my husband is a self-employed music teacher. He gets paid if someone schedules a lesson and just never shows up, because that is still technically using his time cause hes just sitting there waiting, they reserved that time... BUT if HE has to cancel, he NEVER EVER gets paid. No paid vacations for us, no paid sick days. I'm a sahm, so it would certainly help if that was the case (we are a family of 6). But its not... However, I'm sure for the sake of FAIRNESS, my husband wouldn't dream of wanting to charge his students for days he's not there.

Also, I was a nanny for a while... my GOODNESS, I never got paid when I didn't work days I was originally supposed to (and they got a FREE sitter when I couldn't do it... the grandma did it). BTW, My Grandfather died when I was a nanny right around Thanksgiving three years ago- that's NO excuse to get paid when I'm not working however- didn't even cross my mind!!!

Rachel:

I would not pay her for services not received. I don't know what your contract with her says - but really - it is January - I would renegotiate the contract and stop the paid holidays...with the exception of normal/typical vacation/holiday.

I'm truly sorry for all that she has gone through and all of her losses.

I would tell her that her time off during Spring break will NOT be paid. You will NOT double pay for day care services...I know it sucks to be mean as that's not you - but really - it's not right to pay for services you are not receiving!

Since she is planning ahead to not be open, you should not have to pay her. If she insists, I'd find someone else to watch your children. You should not have to pay twice. It's not like it's an infrequent occurrence or just a couple of days. Doesn't matter if her being off is legitimate or not. It's a matter of being available.

Do you have a contract that states you must pay even when she's closed? Most contracts specify a certain number of days for vacation that are planned in advance. With my grandson who was at in home day care if the caretaker was closed his mother did not have to pay.

Why is she planning this surgery during spring break? This puts an extra burden on you. I suggest that if she were concerned about her clients she would schedule surgery during a time that would put the least amount of difficulty for her clients.

I would keep the children with her if you don't have to pay her when she's closed. But, if she insists on pay then I'd find someone who is more available during the times you need her.

It's really hard to make this decision when you love her. I suggest you think of this in terms of a business arrangement and try to leave out your love for her.

Why is she scheduling surgery for days that she knows will inconvenience you?
I wouldn't wait until June 15th. I would find someone to look after all 3 kids now.

ETA - I'm not opposed to her taking time off, I'm opposed to her making her clients pay twice so she can take time off. If she wants to have a couple of week off each year, she should raise her rates a little and put the extra in an account for that time AND provide a back up sitter for her clients.

I would have a talk with her and let her know up front that even though she can't help these things that are happening, you simply cannot pay her for NOT watching your kids.
The clause about paying whether the kids are there or not is usually to protect the daycare provider from parents who are flakey or travel extensively, etc. A provider can't afford to keep a space open for kids who aren't always there.
However, the daycare provider closing her doors for whatever reason is a completely different story in my opinion. I'm sure she can't afford to lose the money, but she should be willing to give the parents a break as they have no choice but to find and pay for alternate daycare.
I understand you really love her, but as a single mother, there is absolutely no way I could pay twice for daycare. That would be just too much.

I did daycare and if it was me in her position, I would let parents know that I can't provide services and not expect money for days I was not physically capable of caring for their kids, whatever the reason. I would hope they would not be inconvenienced to the point that they would find alternate daycare all together.

I think you just need to talk to her.

Best wishes.

Find someone who has at least one partner-that way you will increase your odds of always having coverage.

I think some are missing the point. If you are at a center of course you are going to pay because they will be OPEN. They will find a sub for the class and keep going.

However, that is not the case when using private care. Personally, if you have to pay the person even if they are closed, then it is their responsibility to find someone to cover for them. If they want the money, they should provide the service.

I would not be happy having to pay twice for care. Its expensive and to me unnecessary. I would talk with the provider.

When it is time to pay, I would just ask, how much do I decuct for your time off?

You have to remember that as much as you like her and are connected to her, she is running a business and you are a client. If she isn't performing regardless of the circumstances up to your expectations and limitations in regards to finances, then you have to look at other options. I can see why she is scheduling her surgery then and I can see why you wouldn't want to pay double. You have to do what is best for your family, your kids etc.

Maybe you can ask her for an alternative arrangement? Or even a trade? barter? The options are endless--you may have to be a little creative.....GL

M

I would tell her that this surgery is not your issue and that you will not be paying her for that week. If she cannot find someone to substitute in her home for her while she is out you will find someone else.

In Oklahoma we hire substitutes to come in and work in our homes. It is called the "Angel" program. The get the background checks, the training that a normal worker would get such as CPR and First Aid, they also do the 20 hours of training that the state requires to work in a child care setting. They come and work when needed and are good quality workers.

She is not having emergency surgery. She is having elective surgery. If she can wait until Spring Break to have Gallbladder surgery I guarantee it is elective. If she was having issues they would put her in today and take it out tomorrow. It is a simple little insert and snip type surgery. Not invasion to the body that takes weeks to heal, just a little tiny cut to put a thin scope in to. It is a very easy little surgery even for an emergency one. She can wait? It's NOT a serious issue.
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In most situations child care is a weekly bill that is paid whether you take the kids or not. It is not a day to day thing, the money pays for their slot. Holidays and vacation times do not count against the bill. It is the way that child care givers are able to pay staff and bills regularly. They need to have an income that is steady. It is like a salaried employee. They take a sick day here and there they are still paid their salary.

Same with child care. It's not a drop in situation, it is a child care setting and you pay a weekly fee to hold the kids spots.

In this case though, she is closing again. I am all for child care workers being able to have vacation days and days off for important things. But this is something she can plan ahead for by hiring a substitute and train them in the interim time and the kids can get used to the worker. I think she is not making a good choice here. She needs to provide some stability too.

It sounds like you have outgrown your sitter.

Many providers DO get paid vacation/illness days. You need to see what the contract YOU signed says and honor that. If she is using paid days alloted to her in the contract YOU agreed to, and you do not honor it, what does that say about you?

As a provider, I used to get 20 PTO days, plus paid holidays per year. After so many years in the industry, I felt I deserved it and my local market could bear it. Most of my clients got similar, so I did too.

When the economy went in the crapper a few years ago, I upped my prices to absord that 20 PTO days, and now get unpaid vacation and illness days (but still get 9 paid Holidays). It is to my advantage to close a limited amount of days per year, but my amount is not limited. Since I have done this I have taken somewhere between 8-12 a year, and am fortunate to have access to a (high priced) sub who can come for chunks of time so I can get to Dr appts, etc. I used to have to close full days to make an all day run of attending dr and dental appointments, etc. Its the only way many of us can get such things done.

How different would your situation be in a Center based childcare? Around here, from my understanding, parents are usually alloted a week (5 days) per year to take out of childcare and not pay. You WOULD have childcare more consistently if one of their employees were to be ill or have surgery, etc. But you pay for that. How much more would your daycare bill be for the year? Its a give and take in different care situations and home providers are allowed to have PAID days off, as long as it is within the contract YOU signed.

Best of luck!

In my opinion...
You are paying for you place with your sitter. She has to have time off sometimes, and if she is great, then keep paying her. In my daughters preschool I have to pay, even if she doesn't go - so it should work vice versa. I think up to 2 weeks a year would be fine by me, she is your employee, so give her 2 weeks paid vacation like you would any employee.

We have a fantastic sitter who watches our kids when they're not in school too. We all adore her. But when she closes (illness, surgery, death in the family, etc.) we do not pay her. She doesn't expect it of any of her families.

I think it's worth talking to your sitter and letting her know that it's not standard practice for people to pay their sitter if the sitter is closed. Yes, you pay if YOU decide not to send your kids, but not if she decides to be closed. That's like saying that someone should pay their cleaning lady even if the cleaning lady doesn't show up.

See if your sitter will relax her policy. If not, I'd probably start looking for a more reasonable place.

i'm surprised that so many people are against her getting paid for time off. daycare is an industry, and good daycare providers have the same rights as other workforce citizens which should include some paid time off for emergencies.
sounds like you need to read or clarify your contract with her. obviously paying for unlimited time off is far too burdensome for you, but if she's as awesome as you say, you should be willing to accommodate her to a degree.
you DO have a contract, right?
khairete
S.

If you have a contract with her, follow your contract to the letter. If not, I would simply schedule a time to visit with her about the upcoming time off and express your concern about having to pay for her time off for surgery. Suggest to her that she find a suitable substitute care provider in her absence or you cannot pay her AND pay someone else to watch your children.

Plain and simple...

why do you feel you have to pay her? do you have a contract stating she gets "X" time off? do you get paid time off every time you take a week off? I would tell her your sorry she has to be off but you will have to pay someone else so you won't be paying her. period.

I need to clarify my answer lol. I am all for sitter's getting paid time off. that would be the main holidays and whatever you agree to for her to have a vacation time. 1 week 2 weeks whatever. But she should not be taking vacation time your paying for and then all these other days and still expect to be paid. If she is "closing" she doesn't get paid. I have done licensed home daycare and am now a nanny for a family. It is totally unreasonable that I would expect my boss to pay me even though I have taken off random days that he has had to find someone else for.

She should not get paid if she is closed. In general, the payment if your kids don't go means that you need to pay even if for whatever reason, you choose not to send your kids. And, maybe in case of horrible weather for a day (maybe two). Minor surgery - not so much. I would bring up the issue with her before it happens. Present it like you did to us - you really like her, but you cannot continue to pay for her and additional daycare so she knows up front that you will not be paying her for the time she is closed. It throws the ball into her court.

I know everyone has different policies regarding this, so here's my take. It sounds like you totally understand having to pay for the child who is there full time, all the time, which is right if she has the sick/vacation time to use. Having to pay for the others who are technically only drop in is sticky. It depends on what she has in her policies as far as what you pay and when. They are taking up a spot and she is counting on that income. Does she charge more for "drop-in?" If so, maybe you should only have to pay for half?? Just some thoughts. It is very hard to be self employed and count on a certain income, then have it change.

Look over your policies regarding paying for time off and exactly what you are responsible for. Like I said, everyone does this differently. Good luck...as a parent, I do understand how hard it can be, and as a provider, that income is part of what sustains our family.

Is there a contract? Usually in daycare situations this is in writing up front, to protect both of you.
If not, it really should be. I understand how much you like her and feel for her but you both deserve better: she should be paid as expected, and you shouldn't need to pay unless it IS expected, as per your agreement.
I mean, does your boss pay you when you are not there? I'm sure you have a limited number of vacation and sick days and after that you're own your own, right?
A daycare worker is a professional employee just like the rest of us. If she can't behave like a professional then maybe you should find someone else.

She obviously requires a certain amount of sick days, family leave for emergencies, and or vacations. I've been a provider for 26 years and I have not been paid for vacations. I was however, paid for 3 days off by several parents that just chose to pay me the full amount. BUT, that's because I am open 7 days per week, 24 hours per day, and I go YEARS without taking even a day. I never take a whole week. I don't expect to be paid for my day here or there that I take. BUT, it is nice. So, if you have reached your limit, you have. Tell her that you don't want to leave her, but you won't pay for that week. Ask her if she wants you to find someone else. It's her choice.

I would be honest with her that while you understand that she needs time off here and there, you are paying extra because she still charges you for the time she takes off. You understand that she has bills to pay, too, but if it comes down to finances, you have some choices to make yourself.

If she is unwilling or unable to work other arrangements (have someone else provide care, give you a partial credit) then as badly as you may feel, put on your own business hat and find another care provider that meets your needs.

While a care provider can take time off and she certainly has reason to take this time off, not every situation is right for every person. This is partially why I went with a center because as long as the center was open, my child was there, even if only one of her regular teachers was there that week. When WE went on vacation (or she was sick), we still paid them for our slot.

Personally, I'm an independent contractor. If I am not working, I don't get paid. I'm not caring for anybody's kids, but I also no longer have paid time off in this particular job. What does her contract say?