Baby Won't Breastfeed

I had the same problem with my daughter. She had jaundice when she was born and we had to give her a bottle to see how much milk she was getting! She wouldn't breastfeed for a month and a half. I would just pump, but I would offer breastfeeding once or twice a day. I wouldn't let her get to upset, but I did let her get mad. One day she just took the breast. It was the greatest thing. It took a week to go to full breastfeeding. There is hope!

K.,
Don't give up, but don't put too much pressure on yourself either. I had a similar problem and although it sounds awful this is what I did per my doctor & a lactician nurse. You get a little eyedropper (like for medicine) and feed your baby milk with it. She will probably hate it and cry herself silly (mine did!). Then offer her the breast. She will probbaly refuse it. Then the feeding is over (even if she doesn't eat a lick and cries). Then you just keep repeating this process at each feeding (I didn't even offer her the breast a few times). It will be the worst 24+ hours of your life but then she will latch right on and you will be nursing again. I know it sounds awful that she might not eat but it was my doctor & nurse's advice and it worked. If you do it though, Don't cave and give her the bottle or it will never work. I recommend doing it when your husband's around for moral support-it was so stressful but so worth it. I was able to nurse 7 more months because of it. Good luck.

Hi K.,
I don't know if you have tried this but attempt several positions of breastfeeding like the football hold, cradling her, or you could try stacking about 2 pillows beside you and sitting her on them and then leaning her sideways to the breast. The other way is w/ those same two pillows, lay her down and cradle her head in your hand and to the breast. My son takes to these two best for some reason. Also, you may try hand expressing a little before nursing her so that there is a little on the nipple to encourage her to suck.

One other thing you might take into account is the way baby feels AFTER eating. My daughter had a reflux problem and eating upright was much more pleasant for her. (rather than laying down while breastfeeding) Sometimes bottle feeding is actually better/more comfortable for the baby. Don't take it personally. I don't think it's a sign that your baby isn't wanting to connect with you. It's probably just a comfort issue.

K.,

Let me recommend you get the best book ever written on breastfeeding, "Dr. Mom's Guide to Breastfeeding" by Marianne Neifert. It's available at Amazon or your local public library. She calls this a "nursing strike" and even says that, "it occurs most commonly between four and seven months of age." She says it often begins either with some kind of unpleasantness around breastfeeding (child has stuffy nose or ear infection, rushed feedings) or as a result of low milk supply. She recommends pumping more than usual to make sure your milk supply is high, and then for a baby who often refuses to nurse, "try to get your baby to return to breastfeeding by attempting to nurse him in his sleep", try to relax and let your baby spend as much time as she wants at the breast, even using it as a comfort object. And in addition, I recommend that you call the hospital where you delivered (or another large hospital in your area) and ask to speak to their lactation consultant. It's really great that you're trying to do the best thing for your baby - don't give up!

Neifert, Marianne. Dr. Mom's Guide to Breastfeeding. New York: Penguin Group, 1998. See pages 262-265, 315-316.

My son was a premi and got used to a bottle and then wouldn't breast feed after that. The nurses said that the bottle is easier to feed from and if you want to breastfeed it will take a while. When they get hungry enough they will nurse. I couldn't do that. I'm a weenie. I just pumped and fed. I figured that as long as he was getting breast milk that was enough. I did have to take fenugreek to keep up my milk production. I think I missed some of the bonding, but Thomas is now almost 3 and is a well rounded, happy and very smart child. It also help feeding from a bottle since daddy or relatives could feed him. It is a bigger problem with washing bottles but don't give up. Breast milk has so much more than formula.

Good luck.

K.,

My heart goes out to you....and it seems that you have received good advice. A good pump is a must in order to keep your milk supply. Your insurance may help pick up some of the expense to rent a hospital grade pump.
I would also suggest looking into the Laleche League website. It's full of info and has contact info for local leaders. http://www.lalecheleague.org/

For almost a month I had to express and feed my son with a bottle due to health issues. When I could nurse again, he was very frustrated because it's harder to nurse vs bottle feed. So I chose to use a nipple shield, which did the trick in terms of getting him to latch on. They can be messy and it took me 6weeks to wean him back to just the breast. Target carries them with the other nursing stuff and are made by Medela. They are silicone and wash up easy. You just put the shield in hot water before use --- it makes it more pliable in order to create the suction to keep it on your breast.

Best of Luck!

K.,

I'm noticing a common thread among all of these responses - milk is easier to get from a bottle. Have you tried pumping before attempting to feed your daughter? I would suggest pumping until let-down and then bringing her to the breast. Your milk will flow as easily as a bottle and she will get the instant gratification she is looking for. Try this not only when she's hungry, but also when she's sleeping. To get my daughter to take a bottle, I had to offer it when she was sleeping in my lap (and hungry). She was a little out of sorts and willing to take the bottle because she thought it was me - perhaps the same thing would work for your daughter with the breast.

Also, you could try using a bottle that is more like the breast for an easier transition back. I would suggest the Breastbottle Nurser, (its shape is quite similar to a breast). I found mine at: http://www.onestepahead.com/product/85207/686/117.html

I've had plenty of experience with a stubborn breastfeeding baby and I always call my hospital's lactation consultants. They are the best and have unbelievable remedies to every problem a mother could encounter, (and know what's worked for other mothers with similar problems). If you haven't already, I'd suggest contacting them.

I commend you on trying after two months; you're so strong!

Good luck and keep trying!

S.

Hello
You have lots of gret advice already but, I thought I would put my two cents in. First find an IBCLC (board certified lactation consultant) We have 2 on staff at our local hospital and they can give you lots of info. Also as someone else mentioned La Leche league is an invaluable source of info.

What I know is that the bottle is an easier, quicker way for baby to get the milk. It takes different muscles for her to drink from the breast. I would recommned finding a bottle that has a slower flow and maybe feeding her first with the bottle then offering the breast when she is not so ravenous.

Also and this is just another tip, be careful as to what lotions, soaps and perfumes that you use on your body as she may get a taste of it as she goes to breast. She won't have that taste on her bottle.

Just some ideas I wish you both the best of luck and congratulations for making the choice to give your baby the best in life !

Hi,

I had a similar problem. My son was in NICU the first week and only bottle fed after I went home. We had a very difficult time getting him to go to nursing. At the hospital they recommended putting some of your milk on your nipple. What I ended up doing once we got home was trying to breastfeed and he would get upset and cry, and then give him a bottle, but I would put the bottle right next to my breast so it is coming from that area. I would do this every single time I fed him and after a few days he started nursing and we've been doing it for 9 months now and it's great. I hope that helped. Good luck! There is hope!

HI K.,

It sounds to me that you seem a little stressed or anxious. Maybe if you try to make the room quite maybe put on a nice lullaby tape and try feeding her before she is very hungry. She feels your stress and anxiety. relax and let the milk come down and maybe she will come around.

Did you stop breast feeding her cold turkey when you went to work? Maybe that has something to do with it. (that nipple confusion thing they talk about) I know that I would feed my baby first thing in the morning before I took her to the baby sitter and then again first thing when we got home and at night if she needed it. I totally understand how sad you must feel.

Good Luck
Jen

K. - Are you using a good hospital grade breastpump? I was not able to breastfeed my son (he did some time in the neonatal unit and we could just never figured it out, he would cry, I would cry . . . :) ), but I rented a pump from a hospital supply store and it was great, I filled up a several bottles in just 5-6 minutes. I did that about 4 times a day. Mine was a Medela Lactina.

KEEP TRYING, AFTER I GAVE BIRTH ,IT TOOK ME TWOO WEEKS TO GET MY SON TO BREASTFEED, ALSO,BECAUSE YOU'RE A WORKING MOM, YOU MAY BE PUTTING LOTIONS OR PERFUMES THAT WILL MAKE THE BABY TO REJECT THE BREAST, BECAUSE THERE'S NO NATURAL SMELL ANYMORE.
ALSO TRY A NIPPLE SHELL, IS A LITTLE PLASTIC THING, THAN YOU PUT IN YOUR BREAST, THAT'S HOW I GET MY SON TO DO IT, THEN AFTER A WHILE I STARTED TAKING IT OFF, AND IT WORKED, I BREASTFED, UNTIL HE WAS ALMOST A YEAR. GOOD LUCK

You may hear the term "nipple confusion", but what it really comes down to is that bottle feeding is easier- babies don't have to work at it. Tip that bottle upside, and you will notice how it drips or even flows out! Babies have to work harder at breastfeeding.
Make sure you are only using pure lanolin on your breasts. Perfumes, soaps, lotions and creams not only have a taste, but a scent that can turn your baby off to feeding.
She may just not want to nurse. And as heartbreaking as that may be, remember, the point of nursing is to give your baby breastmilk. And pumping, although definately not quite as enjoyable, is giving your baby the same result.
Hang in there!
You may also want to contact a lactation consultant in your area.