Baby Shower Invite Question

D., It is ok to be blunt and say Adult Baby shower, adults only please, only babes in arms welcome etc...is more than appropriate. If someone is that blatant about showing up with kids you have every right to be blunt. It is offensive and rude for kids to come to a shower when not invited unless of course they are a breastfed newborn/young infant who is reliant on that. Good Luck and don't feel bad. For my wedding....when it came to the reception...My invitation said.....Adult Reception immidiately following the ceremony etc.....Now a days it seems most people need to be reminded of some basic etiquette! Good Luck :)

3 moms found this helpful

I have issued invites where no children is stipulated. I think people appreciate knowing that their children won't be welcome, so they don't show up with them and realize everyone else got a sitter. I think the exception is babies under 6-9 months who are breastfed. They just can't be away from mom, so it might be nice to call, or email anyone who falls in this category to let them know that of course their infant can come, just no kids. This will avoid people rsvp-ing "no" because they think they can't bring the baby. Of course, if you actually don't want babies either (at a BABY shower?!)-expect some no-shows.

2 moms found this helpful

Hi D.,

I think the most tactful way to handle the situation is to arrange a babysitter either on site or at someone's home nearby. Then include on the invitation a note about the babysitter being available so that all the mommies get a break.

2 moms found this helpful

I don't understand why if the invitation is not addressed to the child also would anyone think it's ok to bring their kids! Especially to a function like that. I would just put adults only to make it very clear, also if you look on the internet you can look for sample invitation wording that can help with sticky situations!

2 moms found this helpful

I did a babyshower for a friend in the summer. On the invitations we wrote. That due to space limitations we couldn't have children attend. no one seemed upset about it. only one mom brought a child and it was a newborn in a carseat. so no running around etc. good luck hope you hae a great shower
S.

2 moms found this helpful

I like Sheri S's idea, blame it on limited space. I don't think it is rude to say adults only, most moms would enjoy an afternoon w/o the kids. Good Luck

2 moms found this helpful

Ok it may sound cold but it works. You could say 18 and older only if that makes you feel better. People should understand. Or you could say if it works Ladies Only. They should get the hint if it is for the girls only. Those that are offended need to stay home with their children even if they are well behaved. I would think they would like some girlfriend time w/o children.

1 mom found this helpful

Why not say "Adults Only, Please."? Putting "please" at the end makes it sound a little nicer. Focusing on the adults also sounds nicer than: No children please. It's a hard one. Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

We just had my baby shower last month. My sister's bought response cards from Joanne's or Michael's so that people could RSVP.

Name___________________
will attend _____
will not attend _____

Kind of like this. What you can do is, write the name of the adults that you are inviting on the Name line and then all the adult has to do is check whether they will attend or not. That should give them the hint that the person's name on the response card is the only adult(s) that is invited.

Or you can just write "Adults Only Please" at the bottom of the invitation. They won't be confused by that.

1 mom found this helpful

how about "Ladies Only"? Or if all the guests are moms, than say it's for "Mom's Only"?

however, if most of your guests are moms, be prepared that a little one may be in tow. sometimes moms have to make a choice between celebrating with their friends or not being able to make it. i think in that case, you would want the woman (and child) to show, right? so, try as you might to have it all adults, still be prepared and welcoming if children do attend.

good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

just include the "adults only please" on the invite.

1 mom found this helpful

That is tough - I think it's easier to accomplish for a bridal shower, and now there is the precedent that the children attended a shower at the same venue. I don't think there's a tactful way to do it.

Personally, I think that your sister should be gracious with whatever the outcome is. After all, these people are all coming to "shower" her with gifts for her unborn child. If they bend the invitation, it's their misstep, but I think your sister should be prepared that it might happen and be ready to happily welcome them all, young and old.

And as a PS, if you do specifically non-invite youn'uns, there's the underlying thought of why is she having a baby if she doesn't want children at the baby shower?

1 mom found this helpful

Many people I know want to bring their kids with them most of the time - it's not like an evening out, it's a day shower. And unless your guests have family in the city, getting a babysitter isn't always the easiest or most affordable thing for people to do...not to mention they will be buying a gift already that day for your sister, and paying for their lunch at a sit-down restaurant. Of course if husbands can do the babysitting that could work out. And while it's nice for moms to have a break, it's a baby shower. Which in my experience means there isn't drinking, and they are typically very kid-appropriate. I've never been to an adults-only baby shower. You are right, most people are going to assume kids are welcome unless told otherwise. I would expect some no-shows if babies and kids are excluded.

I know that might sound kind of harsh, and I apologize for that. I'm trying to kind of play devil's advocate and let you know what my response would be to an adults-only shower invitation. Unless the mom-to-be was one of my very close friends, I'll probably opt out of going and send a gift. That being said, maybe her guests will feel completely different about it. Anyway, it's really nice that you're helping her and smart to get a jump on what to do about this a few months in advance. Good luck to both of you!

1 mom found this helpful

Since it's a baby shower people may think it's okay to bring babies/children, although as another person said if it's not on the invite...

Anyway, I would say although it's obvious D. loves children, please leave the children at home or with a trusted sitter so we all can enjoy an adults only shower. Something like that would be nice, I think.

Julie H had a good idea about calling anyone you know may be breastfeeding.

1 mom found this helpful

I custom design baby shower invites, birth announcements, and more. I have had quite a few individuals have this problem so what I've done is to simply add it to the bottom. For example, in smaller font at the bottom you could politely say "Adults Only Please". We've also done things such as make it part of the cute poem depending on who is invited.

Please message me if you would like to check out some of my work! I would love to work with another fellow Chicago Mommy!! :)

Saying Adults Only should be just fine. Another option you can write is, "Due to the location of the shower, this is an adults only shower. Thank you for your understanding."

Just a suggestion, is there an older teen (or couple of them) that you could have provide some child care? We did that for our wedding and it worked out really well. If so, then you could say something like childcare provided if needed. Then they could request it in the RSVP so you would have a count.

Good luck

H.

I wish people would just realize that there are certain things kids should not be brought to... but that's not the case. I would NEVER bring my little ones with me to someone else's shower, but unfortunately not all share my view on that. I think "adult only" would be fine, but maybe you could word it like " NAME is excited to celebrate with other mommies, friends, and family! Unfortunately due to limited space we are asking for the shower to be adults only" I don't know it's hard to word it, but I really don't think anyone would be offended and honestly those that don't understand... TOUGH!