10 answers

Baby Shower - Ottawa,IL

I have a 7 year old son and a 2 year old son. I had two miscarriges in between them. I also had another miscarriage last year, but I am now pregnant and about 9 weeks along and so far so good. My family and friends say, if I have a girl, they are going to throw me a shower. What are the thoughts about this, is it tacky? And if it is "okay" I feel that we would only be celebrating if I had a girl and that is not fair to my boy, if that is what I am having! I just am having mixed feelings about this. Another thing to add is we only have one niece and 10 nephews, so ofcourse my MIL wants another Granddaughter sooooo bad! I do not care what I have, I just want a healthy baby and pray that this pregancy goes smooth!

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I would not be offended by this. They want to throw a shower for you since you have all boy items. they want to help you gather girl (read pink here lol) items. i don't think in any way they are trying to make it seem like a boys is less. just that you already have boy items.

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Hi G.,

I think you should wait until after the baby is born then have a "meet your new family/friends gathering". If people bring things great! If you have the items that are really needed for a newborn the stress of planing can be avoided until after your baby arrives safely.
Best Wishes!

2 moms found this helpful

My personal opinion is that having a shower when you have other children at home is sort of tacky. Not that you asked for one of course, so no offense to you. The only exception would be if there is a big gap in age between the children, like 5 years or more. I think it's nice that they want to throw you a shower, but I would decline. That shouldn't stop them from buying you gifts after your baby is born if that is what they want to do. I was invited to a shower recently for a friend who was pregnant with a girl, and who had a 2 year old boy. Her mom and sister threw the shower for her. I did not go, because I felt she was being greedy, because she already had a baby not too long ago, and she still had all of her baby stuff. Her other sister, however, has a 6 year old girl and is now expecting a baby in March. I would gladly throw her a shower because she lent all of her baby stuff to people over the years and never got any of it back. So, she is really in need of some new stuff. Sorry, that's just my opinion. Congratulations on your new baby and good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

I would tell them you don't want a shower before the baby is born. If they want to hold a little family celebration for you after the baby is born that would be more appropriate.Many blessings to you and your family:)

1 mom found this helpful

Yes, this is tacky. People can give you gifts without having a shower.

I pray for a healthy pregnancy for you.

1 mom found this helpful

So if you're having a girl - what do you really need other than girl clothes, considering you just had a baby 2 years ago? Let's be honest...a baby shower (before the baby arrives) isn't really about the baby. It's about the mother getting showered with gifts and essentials she needs for her newborn. Has any kid ever grown up emotionally stunted because "they didn't have their own baby shower"?

While I don't think the idea of friends/family initiating the idea of 'celebrating' on your behalf is a bad thing, I agree with others in that perhaps you should wait until after the baby is born to do something and definitely don't register. After the birth, everyone will be excited and want to get together whether or not the baby is a girl or a boy, right? :)

Hi G.. Everyone has a different opinion on this topic, and I am another Mom who would never have allowed a shower for my second child (even though he was a boy, after having a girl). My son was given some very sweet, thoughtful "welcome" gifts by friend and family after he was born, so he certainly had his share of "new things!"

However, if you are really, truly being pressured by your family to have a party (and you would truly cause serious family strife by refusing), I would ask them to call it a "sprinkle," do *not* register for gifts, and do *not* give your family a list of friends to invite. Your family can invite the family, and you will avoid any potential "controversy" you might cause if you invite acquaintances or friends that find second showers tacky.

Of course, the best way to avoid all this mess is to not find out the gender of the baby! (Or just keep it a secret!!) :) Very best wishes!!

I don't think it's tacky, as long as you keep it small and don't register. Think pink!

Good luck on your pregnancy & congratulations! I wish you the best. I think it's fine to have a shower for a girl. The primary reason is b/c mom doesn't have girl things & needs a lot. I don't think it's tacky at all. I have a boy & a girl & my mom threw me a "pink shower." It was fine. I think all babies should be celebrated, and someone could even have a shower for a 2nd boy. Why not?

As a side note, I make diaper cakes for baby showers! My link is below. Check it out & pass it on!


I would not be offended by this. They want to throw a shower for you since you have all boy items. they want to help you gather girl (read pink here lol) items. i don't think in any way they are trying to make it seem like a boys is less. just that you already have boy items.

Its not tacky. You have been through a lot, and every baby deserves a few new things.

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