Baby Not Sleeping Thur the Night

Please do not let your baby cry. You can "fix" this without that. I know people say it doesn't harm babies, but the research shows something totally different. Please read

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/handout2.asp
http://www.sleepnet.com/infant3/messages/534.html
http://parentingfreedom.com/cry-it-out/
http://www.kathydettwyler.org/detsleepthrough.html

I found the book The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantly to be a lifesaver. With Conner, I would de-latch him when he was starting to fall asleep. If he started freaking out, I would let him nurse again for a few more seconds until he started falling asleep again. If he cried, I gave it back. It took a little bit but he stopped associating nursing with sleeping and started sleeping through the night. He was 13 months then, though. He still night wakes sometimes from a bad dream, teething pain, being sick, etc... I never stressed about it, though. I enjoy my time with him and know it all goes too fast. My daughter is 9 months old and doesn't sleep through the night. She'll do it when she's ready. I'm not worried.

1 mom found this helpful

This actually sounds quite normal for a baby his age. I would have loved a baby who nursed briefly and fell right back to sleep! Sleeping through the night means five hours for a baby, so you are getting close to that.

There is a baby sleep class next week at http://www.inspiredabq.com which might give you ideas on improving your and your babies sleep habits and patterns. There is also a library there with a variety of books on sleep that might help.

He's doing what's developmentally normal to be honest. Both of mine were/are the same way and over time they gradually grew out of it. BM is digested more quickly so they will wake a little more often to eat, which is a NORMAL thing. And it's normal to be hungry throughout the night..heck my ex-husband got up around midnight or so to eat because he was hungry! They are used to getting nourishment 24 hours a day in the womb, why should it be any different with a baby? Babies sleep through the night when they are developmentally ready to. I co-sleep/slept with mine, which made things so much easier...we both got more sleep. I am half asleep when she wakes up and I nurse her and we both doze off back to sleep...no worries about her waking herself up in general because there's nothing for her to get tangled in. It truly truly is normal though. Don't limit how much he eats, let him decide when he's through, so his tummy will be fuller for a while longer. It DOES pass. One of my favorite books is Nighttime Parenting by Dr. Sears...I really recommend it.

I'm so stupid (maybe just sleep deprived) that I waited until my baby was 14 months before I asked for help here. Anyway, the book Healthy Sleep Habit, Happy Baby by Marc Weissbluth helped me a lot. I modified his stuff a little bit, but overall, it's a good book. I'm sleeping now!!

I bought a baby bumper at Baby's R Us that doesn't allow the legs to get stuck. I think it was called "breathable" or something. It's more like a soft screen and not a true bumber cloth. Perhaps that would help with getting stuck.

One thing to try before getting the book is to put him down earlier. Perhaps he is giving you winding down signals you haven't noticed. If he's rubbing his eyes, it's too late. Putting mine down earlier made him sleep longer (suggested in the book). Go figure!

One thought, at 7 months you may still need to nurse him once in the night. If I remember correctly (from the book), at 7 months it shouldn't be until 5am or so. You'll have to read it to figure out what will work for you.

I hope you get some sleep.
B.

I'm not an expert by any means (my daughter is also just 7 months) but I think it may be time to just let him cry when he wakes up at night. He may be waking up more out of habit than hunger at this age. We had to do it with our daughter even though it broke my heart! The first night she cried for 12 minutes, the second night 20. But the past two nights she has made it all the way through- 7pm to 6am! Hopefully it will continue.

I wish you the best of luck. I know its not easy to handle and people always tell you "he should be sleeping through the night by his age". It will happen, just means some changes maybe on your part.

we found that by playing classical music all night long, our daughter sleeps through the night. You might want to give that a try

Our first took 9 months before sleeping through the night. Part of the problem was she wouldn't nurse long enough due to being small. I think her stomach could only hold a little then she'd wake up in a few hours. Anyway, I know it sounds like a stupid question but how much does he weight. It seems like once they get a little weight on them they sleep better. My middle child weight the most and from the beginning she slept five hours at a time.

I think every baby is different though, so what works for one baby may not for another. I know lots of people who have had success using babywise.

take care,
K.

My pediatritian suggested that I stop nursing in the middle of the night when my son was 9 mo. old. And it worked. They are eating enough now that they don't need to nurse they just want to hang out with you and get some attention from mom. The first couple of nights were tough but soon after he was sleeping through the night.

When my sister's baby was 3 months old, her doctor told her to let her cry the first time she woke up during the night... because it is out of habit, not really because they're hungry. Her doctor said she could cry for no more than 20 mins, then if she wasn't asleep, go pick her up. Now she lays down for bed at 9, and doesn't wake up until 5-6. At first my sister didn't like having her cry, so she would move her (if she was on her back, put her on her tummy, etc) and pat her back or just be there with her.

Interrrupted sleep is so difficult for us, but so normal for babies. One thing you can do is have him sleep closer to you, so you don't have to get up so completely to nurse him. If you do choose to night wean him, please do so gently. He is still so young. Make sure he knows that you are still there for him, but just not for nursing. Here are some more suggestions that might help:

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070300.asp

Some interesting information on baby's sleep patterns:

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070200.asp

Best wishes! :)

Oh I remember those days. It is hard to get up that many times during the night and then function the next day. Getting my baby to sleep through the night took some time too. He was doing the same thing as your baby and then I finally took some advice from my doctor which was against my will. It was to let him cry it out. I really did not want to because it is heart breaking to hear him cry like that for so long. I kept the monitor on but I turned it on low. That way I would know if he really needed me or not. It was the hardest thing I ever did. He cried for over an hour the first night, but the next night it was only 10 min. After that he slept through the night! I couldn't believe it! According to my doctor it is okay for them to cry that long and for them to go all night without nursing. Also, you could try using a white noise machine. I swear it helps. As for him getting stuck in the slats on your crib, I got a breathable bumper. It works great and it gives you piece of mind that he will be okay. Good luck! I hope this advice helps.

I am afraid my response is similar to everyone elses. I also have kids a 2 yr old boy adn a 1 yr old girl. My son still wakes at least 1 time a night, we go into his room, turn his "music" back on, pat or rub his back, and he lays back down to put himself to sleep shortly there after. Our daughter has pretty much slept through the night from 3 months and on.
I have read many books on how to get your baby to sleep (b/c of our son) and have come to the conclusion that some kids just don't sleep as well as others. That doesn't mean you should try different methods to get your baby to sleep, b/c Lord knows, you can't keep going on this way.

You can try the links people have offered you, try the methods some have mentioned, you can even go to your local library and check out all the books they have on baby's sleeping through the night (I know I got about 7 from my local library).

I will say this, I do think your son is old enough to NOT need to nurse at night now. And since he is nursing for short period (10 minutes) and that's suffienct to put him back to sleep, it would appear as though he is using you to fall back alseep. (Of course this means squat if your son has any difficulty gaining proper weight or has been DX with Failure To Thrive).

So I'd say, stop feeding him at night, let him cry it out somewhat and maybe go in adn rub his back and/or play some music to help him learn to soothe himself back to sleep. It'll be hard, you won't see results in a day or two, but it'll be worth it ina month or so.

Hope all this helps!
Best wishes!

My guy's pattern sounds similar. I just broke him of the midnight nurse... This is what I did.

First I changed my attitude. If I went in there expecting a fight, he was ready to give me one. So I went in with the mindset of, "Oh, are you crying? Well, lets get you a drink" He'd cry at midnight, I would go in and pick him up and take him to the kitchen (in the dark or dim) and offer him a drink from a cup. First it was water, now if he wakes, its cows milk. Sometimes he takes it, sometimes not. But mostly it takes him away from where we nurse (or else he sees the rocker and points and gets upset) and distracts him. I hold him for a while and walk in the dark house. When he falls asleep, I put him back in his crib and rub or sing or pat or whatever until he is settled.

Now if he wakes, he will accept the patting and singing and doesn't need the drink. He figured it out. I will soon do the same for the 4 a.m. feeding.

Hope you get sleep soon.

There are lots of methods out there, and I know with a first child it is painful for you to let them cry, but I swear that works. My doctor gave me an article which outlined ways to go about it. First you go in and feed them maybe 2 oz less than they are used to, even if they cry for more, and just gradually decrease it over a few nights. Then when you have gotten it low, you just let them cry. He will be fine.

I was on the same pattern as you and at 8 mos old I did this and it worked off and on until she was 12 mos. When I let her cry, she went on for 3 hours. The next night was a miracle. It was excruciating to listen to though. The night feeding becomes a habit. And I read thru all of the books.. no cry sleep solution, etc. And those are all great if you can get them to work. I couldn't.

Hi C.,

How is your baby falling asleep before going to bed? Do you nurse him to sleep? Waking up throughout the night is normal--he just needs to learn to settle himself back to sleep. I never thought I'd let my baby cry in his crib (he's now 13 months and a great sleeper!) but when he was about 5 months old I realized it would (after a very hard initial period) actually enable him to get better, more solid sleep if he learned to go back to sleep on his own. As long as he's nursing well throughout the day and before bed, I'm sure he's not hungry in the middle of the night--just wanting to nurse because maybe that's the only way he can fall asleep. When my son was younger, if I put him to bed awake (not letting him fall asleep nursing) and let him cry a little as he fell asleep, he would not wake up crying later in the night.

Read "On Becoming Babywise" by Gary Ezzo and Robert Bucknam! It is excellent. All 3 of my kids were sleeping through the night by 2-3 mos. old because of this book. I have many friends who also use this method and have had great success. Good luck!

When my daughter was born (my first child) she had to go into the NICU for 5 days for some breathing problems. Once she got home she would not sleep unless I held her all night. I had to wait till her dad got home so that I could go to the bathroom or grab something to eat. She was always latched on as if i was her binky. She did this for 3 months and I was exhausted from the lack of sleep and living on coffee to make it through the day. I talked to her pediatrician and he suggested something that has worked very well for me and for the other 4 new moms in our family. It is tough but it really does work. Feed your son right before he goes to sleep and instead of nursing or rocking him to sleep lay him in his crib, turn on some quiet music, and leave the room. He will cry. You will know if he actually needs something if you pick him up and he keeps on crying. But if he stops crying when you pick him up he is fine and you should lay him back down. Our pediatricain told me to let my daughter cry for 10-15 minutes and then go and pick her up. Within a month she was sleeping by herself and by the time she was 5 months old she slept for 8 hours and was a regular nap schedule. It was harder on me and her dad than it was for her and now we are all sleeping well and rested. Now that he is 7 months old you are probebly feeding him some solids which should help with his sleeping schedule as well. When they are full they sleep better. Hope this helps you. now also when you lay him in his crib every week add another 5 minutes to how long you wait before you go in and pick him up.

First, let him nurse for at least 15 to 20 minutes. THe lactation specialist at the NICU when I had my son told me that there were stages of the milk that was produced. THe first 5 minutes is the more watery milk, the next 10 minutes is the 'steak and potatoes', and the last 5 minutes is the 'dessert'- very fatty and sleep producing. Do NOT let him go to sleep while nursing. SHe told me that that was the worst thing to do. If you do this-he'll sleep longer. If that doesn't work, do what I did to my son at night. I couldn't produce much milk so I supplemented him with formula. Yes, I'm going against the grain but wow he would sleep 7 to 8 hours because the body does not digest it as fast as breast milk. Do what you think is right for the both of you but please, nurse him as long as he'll take you. I know you're tired but you will get more sleep.

Now, I don't have any grand ideas here other than to encourage you to try whatever you can. My son woke up every 90 minutes until he was 11 months old. And then one day, like magic, he didn't wake up. I don't know why. I had tried everything and nothing worked. At least when I was crazy tired I knew that I had tried and didn't have to beat myself up for not giving it a shot.
Keep an open mind when people give you advise. If it's something you think you can do, give it a good honest try. I'm talking a few nights at the very least. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work, but you tried. Then move on to the next experiment. If it doesn't sound like something you would do, just smile and thank them for taking an interest. When you do stumble across the magic pill, you will be amazed at how good you feel both because you accomplished something and you finally got some sleep.
Good luck. And keep in mind, it won't last forever.

Things that I've tried to encourage sleeping through the night are, make sure he has a regular schedule during the day. Eat, sleep, play etc. Make sure he is nice and worn out by bed time... =) I know this isn't much but I hope it helps!

Two things:
How does he get stuck in his crib? If his arms or legs are getting stuck in the bars, you want to make sure the crib you have has the bars spaced to regulation (no more than 2 3/8 in.) and you might want to try a bumper to keep him from getting stuck. Babies R Us carries a breathable bumper that fits snuggly against the crib bars, but is mesh so there's no risk of smothering.
You also might want to stop nursing him at night. By his age, babies get more into the habit of waking to eat just because that's what they've always done and not because they're actually hungry. Try just holding him for a bit or giving him water or, if you can tolerate it, letting him cry and put himself back to sleep. The latter will be hardest on you at first, but better for him since he will learn to self-soothe and will develop the ability to put himself back to sleep whenever he wakes at night. Make sure his tummy is really full before bedtime. Try working a cereal/food feeding into the evening routine and nurse him a bit longer than usual right before putting him to bed. If he's nice and full before bed and learns that he won't get anything but water in the middle of the night, I'm willing to be he'll start sleeping through pretty quickly. Good luck!