29 answers

At What Age Should a Child Not See a Parent Naked? Opinions Welcome

Hi all, I’m just wondering at what age you stopped letting your child see you naked. My son is 5 y/o and will still on occasion hang out in my room while I take a shower. He sometimes plays at the sinks which are right next to the shower but he doesn’t watch me or anything. Our shower has glass all around.

Our shower and bath tub are separate but attached to each other and at times he will bathe while I shower. Since our shower is glass we have a clear view of one another the whole time.

When I get out of the shower he will hand me my towel and robe if he is just hanging out but doesn’t really pay attention to the fact that I’m naked. If he is in my room while I am dressing I don’t mind it.

However I have started teaching him about privacy when he is dressing so now he will go into his room saying “I need some privacy please” and then closes his door.

What rules do you have about your children seeing you naked?

What can I do next?

Featured Answers

I saw my mum naked yesterday (I'm in my early 30's and she's in her early 60's).

My son saw me naked this morning (8), and I've seen him naked twice today.

Skin isn't a big issue for us. PRIVACY, otoh, is. We've been teaching about privacy, and respecting wishes for privacy since he was a toddler.

15 moms found this helpful

We don't really have any rules, I agree that kids gain modesty in their own time. We just don't make a big deal about it. They very much understand that when there are others besides direct family (ie grandma aunts and uncles) they are VERY modest but seriously we don't have AC and everyone hangs out in their undies all summer long if we are inside. Also things like, this morning I had to make a dash to the laundry room for pants. They teased me about my tightie whities but that's it :) It is really no big deal IMO. We share bathrooms and even the shower sometimes still too. Oh and they are a 9 y/o boy 6y/o girl and 3y/o boy.

5 moms found this helpful

no rules here, my kids are almost 12 boy, 10 boy, 8 girl and 4 months, lol. They still share the bathroom, although my oldest son does generally shower first because he has chosen to want some privacy. I think it was when I was pregnant and started getting huge that they all started averting their eyes if I was changing, so now I try to respect that and close the door, but I very openly breast feed the baby in front of them.

From my experience kids will make that transition on their own, to want privacy, or to be uncomfortable if you are undressed, and there is no reason to rush them into it.

5 moms found this helpful

More Answers

I saw my mum naked yesterday (I'm in my early 30's and she's in her early 60's).

My son saw me naked this morning (8), and I've seen him naked twice today.

Skin isn't a big issue for us. PRIVACY, otoh, is. We've been teaching about privacy, and respecting wishes for privacy since he was a toddler.

15 moms found this helpful

I don't think there's any right or wrong answer here. My kids are 13, 10 and 8 and they've all seen me naked, I've seen them all naked even within the last week. We don't go out of our way to walk around naked, but if someone catches a glimpse of a naked someone as they're walking from the bathroom to their room or something, it's no big deal. We're just very open and comfortable about our bodies in our household. I know others aren't as comfortable and that's just fine, in fact they'd probably be pretty surprised at how laid back WE are. My son (the 13yr old) has special needs, as well as eczema, and sometimes needs help with hygiene, which might involve me seeing him naked. They all know that if they ask for privacy, they'll immediately get it, but they rarely care enough to ask. If it changes as they get older, that's fine, I'd never push nakedness on someone who was not comfortable with it.

11 moms found this helpful

Well I just saw my mom naked over the weekend--I'm 30--and I've turned out okay.

10 moms found this helpful

My parents were never shy with nudity. As other people had said below I was the one who stopped wanting to see them naked and avoided going in their room if I knew they were changing. I turned out to be a healthy functioning adult and I plan to do the same with my kids. Plus I believed seeing them so confident in their bodies showed me to be confident in mine.

8 moms found this helpful

We've never made a big deal of it in our house. We don't go out of our way to be naked in front of the kids, nor have we made a production of not being naked in front of them. We have a boy (5) and girl (3) so they each know what the "parts" on the opposite sex look like. Any questions we've got (e.g "why do you have hair there?") we've tried to answer factually and briefly. So I guess we don't have any rules per se, and when the kids get self-conscious about nudity, which they will surely do, then they'd better make themselves scarce when we're naked!

7 moms found this helpful

My kids are 8 and 4.
They see us naked.
It is just, when doing normal things like changing clothes or showering or going to the bathroom.
And my Hubby sleeps with just underwear.

Our kids have no issues about it. Nor do we.
But yes of course, since they were younger, they do know and have been taught about privacy and about things like that. Or in regard to strangers or others. And we respect their privacy as well.

They often also (my Mom lives with us), they will sometimes just pop in to my Mom's room and there she is showering or changing her clothes. But its not a big deal.
They just giggle and start chatting with her. Normal stuff.

6 moms found this helpful

Whenever you feel uncomfortable. Showing nothing is wrong with the naked body in its natural state (shower, dressing, walking around, etc) is good. I am still naked in front of my almost 6 y/o daughter, my husband hasn't felt comfortable for about a year and a half now - so he wears his underwear around the house.

6 moms found this helpful

no rules here, my kids are almost 12 boy, 10 boy, 8 girl and 4 months, lol. They still share the bathroom, although my oldest son does generally shower first because he has chosen to want some privacy. I think it was when I was pregnant and started getting huge that they all started averting their eyes if I was changing, so now I try to respect that and close the door, but I very openly breast feed the baby in front of them.

From my experience kids will make that transition on their own, to want privacy, or to be uncomfortable if you are undressed, and there is no reason to rush them into it.

5 moms found this helpful

I am pretty not caring about being naked in front of my boys. My 5 years i will choose sometimes to be more modest around because he has asked. He still has no problem coming into bathroom while i pee, poo, shower...anything else one does in the bathroom. So i always wonder what his mind processes naked as when i am dressing. I guess it doesnt matter..i still respect his wishes. My hubby also thinks five is a good age to start being more modest. honestly this has never been my style. I dont walk around naked, freely around the house. I still am not shy about nakedness. My other two still shower with me. they are 4 and 2. So, there are no real rules. just follow what your momsinct is telling you and if he asks for it give it too him. If he is ok with still bathing while you shower. i see no harm in that.

Every family will have its own idea of the time to stop. My parents still to this day have no problem changing in front of us. I dont even notice it if i am deep in conversation with my mom or something and she is getting ready.

To each their own!!

5 moms found this helpful

Hi, I didn't read your answers. But I am 26 my brother is 22 and we still see my Mom naked on a daily basis :) haha. We have never been weird about it, just the norm for us i guess. My Dad still walks around in his titty whities as well. So its never been weird to us. My husband & I, walk around naked from the shower and our two boys (8 and 2) have no problem with it. We have never made nudity somethng to be embarrassed about- after all isn't the human body beautiful? (maybe not all :) haha. We dont worry abou it, we are family and its no biggie but im sure not everyone feels this way.

5 moms found this helpful

We don't really have any rules, I agree that kids gain modesty in their own time. We just don't make a big deal about it. They very much understand that when there are others besides direct family (ie grandma aunts and uncles) they are VERY modest but seriously we don't have AC and everyone hangs out in their undies all summer long if we are inside. Also things like, this morning I had to make a dash to the laundry room for pants. They teased me about my tightie whities but that's it :) It is really no big deal IMO. We share bathrooms and even the shower sometimes still too. Oh and they are a 9 y/o boy 6y/o girl and 3y/o boy.

5 moms found this helpful

I don't think we should teach our children to that being naked is wrong or weird. It is natural and especially seeing eachother in the family naked isn't a big deal. I do agree that children should learn privacy of others and sometimes that will be when one showers/bathes, goes to the bathroom, or changes. I think your doing a good thing teaching how to be private and taht sometimes mom needs privacy as well. I think 4/5 is a good age that way they can grasp the concept.

4 moms found this helpful

I started when mine were 5 ish, They know now at 9 and 6 that privacy is important And I think that's VERY important.

4 moms found this helpful

Hi D.,

If you are asking the question then you must know that there are boundries. And at 5 it may be harmless, but its the age of discovery and with so many things in the world to discover Mom and Dads body parts should not be on the map. Being a child that was molested, I seen a lot of things early in my life. So when I was molested I thought it was what I was supposed to do even though he was 16 and I was 8. So exposing your child without any boundries can be harmful.

Good Luck
And I'm glad your even asking the question!

4 moms found this helpful

Reminds me of an answer to this question a few months ago (I think from Page)...It still makes me giggle!

She said she was getting dressed in her bedroom after showering, and her 16 year old barreled in, saw her naked, screamed "WHAT THE F*&%" and ran out of there...that pretty much answered that question :).

4 moms found this helpful

My husband started being more discreet around our daughter when she was around 3 1/2 but she still sees me naked from time to time (she's 4 1/2 now). I don't think it's as much of a big deal for a child to see a parent of the same sex naked but, honestly, your house - your rules.

3 moms found this helpful

Our home is open and honest. My children know about their bodies and that being naked is natural and ok. I walk around naked sometimes in the house before getting in the shower or afterwards so my kids see me naked frequently. I don't think there is a set age where I would shy away from them and try to hide my body. If it bothered them or it bothered me, that would be the time where I would ask to have privacy or if they wanted privacy, i would welcome and respect that. For now, its fine the way it is. Both my husband and I are like this---our kids just really don't care that we are naked. Our little ones run around the house in the buff and it doesn't bother me a bit.

M

3 moms found this helpful

I have two boys 14 and 10 and they still see me naked pretty regularly. We are very laid back when it comes to our bodies here. Though we have taught them that not everyone is like us. That they should close the bathroom door or knock if the door is closed to our bedroom or such. They don't go out of their way to see us naked but they don't bat and an eye about it when it happens.
Basically do what feels right to you and your family.

3 moms found this helpful

We have 2 daughters, 4 and 1/2 and 10 m/o. I don't mind if they see me naked. In fact our oldest sometimes showers with me if we're crunched for time. We hadn't really decided on an "age" for her not to see my hubby naked. However....funny story to follow.... We were on vacation at Sesame Place when she was a little over 2. We had gone back to the room to shower before dinner. Hubby had just come out of the shower when our daughter noticed he was different from us for the first time. She asked "Daddy why do you have a turtle?" Hubby quickly replaced his towel. Needless to say it caught him off guard and I could do nothing but laugh hysterically. She just kept asking repeatedly. I simply said "Daddy has boy parts and you and Mommy have girl parts." She was really stuck on that for quite some time and would say "Did you know Daddy has a turtle?" From that moment on hubby is very careful when coming out of the shower or changing clothes :)

2 moms found this helpful

In our house we kept things simple - we shared the bathroom until the children decided they no longer wanted to! There's no "right" or "wrong" here. The moment either one of you starts to feel uncomfortable, that's the time to stop. Remember, you're the best judge of what is right for you and your family. As long as your child knows that "public" nudity is not accepted outside your home or when you have guests, I don't think there's anything to worry about.

2 moms found this helpful

I have two girls, ill never shy away from them in that way, its natural and im their mother. Now my husband doesnt want the girls ever to see him naked, he has not explained why but i think it is because he does not want them to stare and become curious about "them". I think hes gonna be one of those dads who hate any boy they bring home, lol/,

2 moms found this helpful

About 3... but really my son was very verbal at that age and started telling complete strangers all about our private parts and how funny looking and different they were. So... let's just say I wished it would have stopped closer to 2. And we were teaching about modesty and privacy, but it doesn't quite work when you are still showing it off. My son is naturally modest though, so it works for us.

2 moms found this helpful

I really think it is when you and/or your kids start feeling weird about it.

2 moms found this helpful

No issues if the same sex sees you....However, by the time they are five and are very curious..its just appropriate to have modesty and privacy. While nuditity is compeltely natural..I certainly don't need to walk around naked especially as my kids get older

2 moms found this helpful

My family to this day is still comfortable being naked around each other.....We were open about it and there was never any icky or embarrassed feelings....My husband gets weirded out if he is naked in front of our daughter, but he was raised in a closed door household and thinks she shouldn't see his man parts. Mine was an open door.....To each his own, really.....If you feel privacy is best, by all means implement that...Everyone has to be comfortable for it to be okay.....If everyone is comfortable with the situation, it is healthy......

2 moms found this helpful

I think the cut off age varies for every family and child. Nudity isn't bad so if a kid catches a glimpse and you don't make a thing of it, no harm done.
I have found that kids who have never seen their mother or father naked or have no siblings of the opposite sex are the ones that really demonstrate more curiosity about things. It's all about the mystery and the unknown.
We travelled quite a bit when my kids were little and if our hotel room only had one bathroom, inevitably someone needed to pee or brush teeth or something while someone else was in the shower. It was never a big deal.
I don't think people should sit around naked watching TV in front of their kids, but kids will let you know when a glimpse of their parent with no clothes on is a case of serious yikes!
I think teaching privacy is a great thing but not to the point where a kid thinks that being naked, in and of itself is bad. Obviously, they don't show their bodies to anyone that isn't in their family. But even that isn't always the case. Both of my kids were swimmers and they saw other naked kids in the restrooms. In high school, you shower. There's nothing wrong with showing a little modesty though.
I think teaching your son to honor his own rights to privacy is awesome.
That way he will understand when you want your own privacy.

Best wishes.

2 moms found this helpful

I was 36 when I was living with my mom temporarily 2 years ago and I still saw her naked, LOL!

Your son is probably at an age where it just doesn't bother him yet and that's fine. I think as they get older they naturally don't want to see Mom naked anymore and don't want Mom to see THEM naked either. I think my stepson was around 8 when he started chasing his mom out of the room because he didn't want her to see him undressed. I know that when he was 6 he still didn't have any problem parading around in his tighty-whities in front of me and I had to get his dad to say something to him because I was NOT his mom and I didn't feel comfortable with it.

1 mom found this helpful

I think when your son shows interest in your body or is uncomfortable seeing you naked, then it's time to close the door. There is no magic number ...kids all mature at different rates

1 mom found this helpful

Kids don't know what modesty is until we teach them. I believe a better word for "modest" is "shame" A lot of parents stop letting their children see them naked when they start getting curious and asking questions or staring. But we have to remember that they are not staring to be pervy, they don't know what that is either until we teach them. This is actually the best time to LET them see you naked.

Think about it like this. They see you naked, they don't know about sex, or shame, or taboo or any of that stuff, so what's the worst that can happen from this? Well I can tell you the best....

The best thing that could happen is that they start asking questions and you will get to become the best thing your child could ever hope for, an adult who can teach them about the birds and the bees. You can answer all of their questions and then they won't have to get all the wrong information from their friends or someone else outside the home.

Remember the only reason we think nudity is so bad is because we were made to think it ourselves. Don't put that stigma on your children. Teach them when it's appropriate and when it's not, but they shouldn't be afraid to see or be naked in their own home. That's teaching them to be ashamed of their body.

My daughter is now grown and engaged to be married. She is 24 years old and has been with her boyfriend for 5 years now. Now I can't be sure, but because of treating the nakedness like this, it created a by-product of trust. We don't have secrets in this house. If there is then they are kept quite well... But my point is from what she says and from what we gathered anyway, she is still a virgin saving herself for marriage. You can't ask for anything better. It's like a story book.

I don't advocate walking around naked all the time, but just be comfortable getting dressed or showering, basically times when nudity is more or less a must, those are the times that are appropriate and their shouldn't be any shame. I can probably make a list of all the pros and cons (if any cons) of why it really shouldn't be the issue people make it out to be.

I am only speaking from experience. Some people feel very strongly about nudity. I just feel that their fears are misplaced and they are not thinking logically. But again this is just my opinion, but I do speak from exp.

Please just think about it.

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