Are You NOT Suppose to Have a Baby Shower After Having Just Had a Child?

I just wanted to thank you and everyone that responded. I'm in a similar situation, expecting our second. I had it in my head that having a shower for a second baby was rude, just because so many people gave so much of what we needed for our first. Now here we were asking for MORE for our second. I've since had my opinion revaluated. The idea that every child should be celebrated really hit home. This baby is just as special/important to ME as our DD, and to the rest of my family & friends. We're just taking a different approach and concentrating on the items to re-stock (like diapers, wipes, meds) but mostly using this occasion to get together and visit, something we manage to never have time for these days.

Anyhow, a very heartfelt thanks!

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Every one is going to have an opinion about this and it isn't going to be the same one. I think that it USED to be proper etiquite to only have a shower for the first baby. But times have changed. I have 3 children and I was given showers for all of them. My sister has 2 kids and she also had 2 showers. Obviously the person who wants to throw the shower wants to do this for you. Let her. If you are worried about people thinking it is rude, then don't invite those people. Good luck.

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If you want to have another shower than do so. Opt to have a small one paid for by you and your husband at your home. Make it a diaper shower. Or if you have a friend who wants to volunteer to give you a shower don't pass up your blessing. For the friend who does not agree love her anyway and continue on in your beautiful new blessing from God.

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I wouldn't even thought that this could be considered rude. I thought it was common sense that if your having a baby you can have a shower. I think its funny that people are worried about etiquette but don't give a second thought to hurting someones feelings by telling them not to have a shower. Every baby is something to celebrate and an invitation means you can come if you want to its not a requirement. So enjoy your shower!
I 'plan' on having a baby shower for my next kid, and will ask for diapers or a dish to freeze instead of a gift registry.

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If someone offers to throw you a baby shower I think you should tell her thank you! I see no reason that you shouldn't have another shower, especially since its for a boy.

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Among my friends and family, it's considered poor taste to have a baby shower where gifts are expected for a second (or third, or fourth) child. I think it's lovely to celebrate a subsequent baby with a nice lunch with your girlfriends before or after the baby arrives, but in my opinion it should not be an occassion where gift giving is expected.

Obviously lots of people will buy your new baby gifts after he arrives regardless of whether there is a shower--but I personally would not want a friend hosting a baby shower for me in these circumstances.

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First of all, Congratulations on BOTH of your new additions! I have never heard of anyone only having one baby shower>?!? I have had five (5) children. I had three (3) baby showers because that was what I chose to do. My friends and family always suggested giving me a shower for EACH one of them. I don't feel that it is improper. A baby is such a blessed event! Why not have a shower? It's a celebration of life! I would accept my friend's offer for the shower. Please don't let other people fog your mind up with THEIR beliefs. Besides, you can do whatever you want. Is there a law stating you can't? Also, I am not sure where you are with spirituality, but a word of wisdom from the Word (The Bible).

Philippians 4:19-20 (King James Version)

19But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

20Now unto God and our Father be glory for ever and ever. Amen

A.--again--congratulations. Remember, you are capable of making choices/decisions of your own! I'm sure all your FRIENDS would be happy to assist you with this new baby through another shower--it is a blessing!!!! MY GOD will supply all that you need for a life that HE has sent you!

Remember, this is ONLY a suggestion/opinion.

Shalom (Peace)

S. B.
Christian Counselor

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This is a touchy subject for most ppl but one that gets under my skin quick!!! Don't let someone else tell you what is appropriate and inappropriate. You have a shower because you want to celebrate the new life you're bringing into the world. If your friend has a problem giving you another gift - tell her she's not obligated. If she thinks it's ridiculous - tell her not to come! You don't need someone looking down on you for something so silly! Have your shower, gir,l and enjoy every minute and every friend there to support you! Sounds to me like it's not about the gifts to you... if she's a true friend... she should already know that about you!

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I do not see why you shouldn't have another baby shower, this is another child. I have seen people have two baby showers for the same child because two different people gave them showers, one a personal shower with family and friends and one at work with co-workers. It is diffently not ridiculous.

Have a great shower.

M.

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An option is to have a "Welcome Baby" party after baby is born. Then it's kind of up to folks as to whether they want to bring a gift or not. We did this with my son...my kids are 20 months apart. It was easier in a lot of respects than the traditional pre-baby shower.

Either you can host the welcome party, or someone else can.

Congrats on your unexpected blessings!

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*rolls eyes* my mom thinks this too. I have been to several churches that give baby showers to the moms no matter how many children you have. A friend of mine will be attending a shower for someone's ninth baby!

1) EVERY child should be celebrated

2) clothes get worn out, consumables get used up, and EVERY mom needs new baby stuff

3) go to Babies R US or do their baby registry online, or go to Target or Walmart (I think you can register there too.) That way people know just what you need.

I've had four girls and if we have a boy I do have a SMALL stash of boys clothes and I will definitely need a baby shower. I use cloth diapers and wipes but I am always happy to receive free newborn diapers! MY baby swing broke, my bouncy seat broke, and my portable swing may also be broken...so I will need baby gear as well.

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A true friend will understand and have another baby shower. Maybe a family member can be the host. I did not want a pre-baby shower because I wanted to be sure the sex of my child. So my co-workers gave me an after baby shower.

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Every baby should be celebrated!!

My girlfriends, had a "welcome baby/diaper" shower for my second, who was a girl and my first was a boy.

I took Olivia to the shower, they had it after she was born and I had a couple of weeks to realize what I needed. Everyone got to hold her and see her and I received much needed diapers and clothes.

Also, three friends and relatives who had girls brought me all their used clothes...Olivia was a beautifully dressed baby, well still is...

Don't worry what others think or old fashioned etiquette. If some one wants to bless you and your baby let them!! {{{hugs}}}

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The Big Book of Etiquite says that you are not to have another shower, but if a friend wants to give you one you can accept that offer. You could invite some of the same people that came to your last one, but it also says that they don't have to come. They came to the last one. If the only things you need are clothes and diapers then you really shouldn't depend on your friends and family to supply those for you because "in this economy" they may not be able to afford your child either.

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You should have a baby shower for all your baby's. You still need things for the one soon to come like diapers, another car seat, wipes, and clothes. It also help if you ask your friends if they have any clothes for your soon to be son. There is nothing wrong with having another shower and seeing if any of your friends have extra clothes that they are going to get rid of anyways. Its normal. My sister and I have both share clothes for our girls for the last 12 years. My son is the lucky one that doesnt have to share since he's the only boy in our family.

I hope you enjoy your baby shower and get everything you need and want. Good luck.

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I echo what these ladies have said.
If you have a friend wanting to shower you/your baby - go for it!
For my #2 we had a 'baby welcoming' instead. I did not have any ultrasounds so I didn't know his gender until he was born. My friend who hosted me decided to wait so she and others would have a better idea what to buy.

hth and Congratulations!

K., mama to
Catherine, 4y
Samuel, 15m

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