Anyone Go to Their Class Reunion?

Updated on August 04, 2010
C.1. asks from Elcho, WI
15 answers

My 25 yr is coming up in October, I have mixed feelings about going. I was very shy thru out school, I grew up very poor, wore raggedy old hand-me-downs to school and was teased and harrassed to the point that I cried most days when I got home from school. I had very few friends too. I have one H.S. friend I still keep in touch with but she's a year ahead of me.

I'm afraid to meet up with some of these people that did these things to me. I still am a tad bit on the shy side so it's not easy for me to talk to people. I have accepted 17 of my classmates (I had 167 in graduating class) as friends on Facebook, but I never care to see the really hurtful ones again.

I have a few friends on there that keep trying to encourage me to go, but when I think about all the sad times I went thru as a child and thru my senior year, it's hard for me to say I'll be there.
Has any of you ever went to your reunion and regretted it? Or went and actually turned out you were happy you did go?

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C.W.

answers from Austin on

I haven't had a reunion yet, but I was in the same situation you were in... shy and misunderstood, and shunned a bit because of the clothes I wore and my family's situation... I am planning to go when it rolls around just to show everyone that their petty judgments and actions couldn't keep me down! :)

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M.G.

answers from Dallas on

Since you are having doubts, don't go!! There is no law that states you must go to your H.S. reunions. Personally, I think it is crazy to attend an event in which you haven't seen these people in decades. They are not in your life, so why waste an evening making chit-chat conversation with people you will either never see again, or see in 10 or 20 more years? Time is precious, and I do not want to waste time talking to people who haven't been in my life for decades. Obvioulsy, I did not go to my 10 year reunion. My 20 year reunion is coming up and I will also pass on that one. I only want to keep in touch with my true friends (the people who are currently in my life). I do not care to live in the past and have "surface" conversations with people who are not in my life, but that's just me.

My best advice to you - don't put yourself in an uncomfortable situation. Why would you want to do that to yourself? I say be happy w/ your current friends and live in the present, not the past.

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D.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

I say go!! Get a rocking dress, go with a friend (doesnt have to have had gone to school with you..or your husband), have a few drinks before and plan on having fun. If it sucks...go for a while and then have a night out with friend/husband.

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V.M.

answers from Erie on

HI, maybe i'm jaded but i'm guessing the reason they are all pushing you to come is not so that they can catch up and hang with you, but so they can say x number of people from our class came and what a great turn out it was. If you think they are going to sit in corner and chat with you all night, I think you would be disappointed. what a scrooge i sound like, i also think alot of times people put you (not you specifially but people in general) on their facebook pages not because they actually like you but just because they have met you once before.
so that is how i could judge this situation, if you have a niggle in the back of your mind that i am right don't go, if you think no no these people love me and would make sure i had a great time, then go. I have to admit, i have never gone and don't plan on going and hide from aquaintainces that i see in the grocery store, so maybe my advice isn't the best.

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J.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

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S.D.

answers from Chicago on

I did not go to my ten yr reunion, but I did got to the ice-breaker they had the night before. I'm glad I went to that, I saw some old friends I hadn't seen since, and didn't really acknowledge the girls who I didn't really get along with in H.S. I say don't let these men/women get the best of you. Show them you've turned into an amazing, strong woman. It's up to you to decide. HTH and good luck!

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

I went to my 10th reunion - it was fun. I just skipped 20 and 30. My son had a black belt test the same weekend as the reunion so I had a prior engagement (plus my vacation plans are for a different week and place) and I now live 4 states away from where I grew up. When the 40th reunion comes around, my son will be in collage and I'll have more time for reunions. Right now I'm busy raising my child and and enjoying it. Those who had kids right out of high school are probably grand parents right now. It's a great time to see how people turned out (and how they have aged) and catch up on gossip. I checked out the reunion pictures posted on Facebook, and everyone is larger, grayer and the guys are all bald. I had a hard time recognizing people. Out of a class of just over 400 people, maybe 30 or 40 went to the reunion.

L.A.

answers from Austin on

I always go.. We have a blast. We alll agreed at the 10 year reunion that bygnes be bygones.. We were all adults now and have nothing to prove..

The 25th is so fun because people are not trying to impress anyone and have been through many life lessons. If you go, be sure to take photos of your child/children/ grandchildren. Everyone will be sharing.

Be yourself, smile and ask questions. People love to talk about themselves.

Where do you live now?
Do you have children? how many?
If they had siblings ask about them also..
Maybe ask if they work, what do they do?
Go with a friend if you are worried..

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E.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

I really wanted to go to mine, but was wary of spending the money to just see random people. Started working on contacting people I wanted to see but had lost touch with. They weren't going due to cost and lack of desire. We ended up planning a dinner at Christmas time, when some from out of state were in to visit family. I think about 13-15 from our class, plus a few spouses. We had a great time catching up and it was a fraction of the cost. I got to see the people that mattered to me, not just random acquaintences. Since you are in contact through facebook you might try something similiar. Good luck!

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T.C.

answers from Colorado Springs on

I wouldn't go. My husband and I went to our 20 year reunion and felt it was a waste of time and money. He was kinda popular, I was not terribly so one way or the other. We didn't have "bad" experiences in high school in that regard. But, it was such a waste of time! We saw people we used to know, but honestly, they are not our friends now. We have a casual acquaintance with them. Some of the people thought they were still 18, and that was kind of funny to watch in a sad way. Not worth it. We wouldn't do it again.

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L.K.

answers from Kansas City on

We just had our 30 year and I was in charge. I guess I was in the 'popular' group since I was a cheerleader and homecoming queen etc. But I was a friend to all. There were at least 4 people out of the 26 classmates there that said the only reason they came was because I was in charge and had personally reached out to them.

I'd say go and if you feel uncomfortable you can always leave. You never know what issues people are facing now or even then but somehow no one knew.

My feeling is that we are all in this together and I hope that I made a difference either then or now in someone's life.

In good health,

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D.R.

answers from New York on

i wasnt the most popular person in hs, i had my group of friends but i did also get teased when i was younger. i went to both of my reunions and i am so glad i did. honestly, i dont know if i would have had the nerve to go if i wasnt going with my friends, and all my old insecurities caused me to drink way too much, but i am so glad i went because it was very eye opening for me. i had several conversations with people that i surely never spoke to in hs, and i guess with a couple of drinks in you and now that we have all lived real lives and everyone has been through real things, people get real. and i learned that some people that always seemed so confident and amazing were also insecure, and some people who were mean to me had really crappy childhoods and were miserable in general. one girl even told me that she always remembered a story i had written and started to cry, and when i told her i became a teacher she did a little happy dance! it meant a lot to me and i think of it all the time. i made a somewhat embarrassing "confession" of my own to my first crush, it was funny and we both had a good laugh. i had other friends who actually got apologies from someone who tormented them. things like that. they are grown up now too, you know? and you never know what other people have dealt with. it gave me a lot of perspective. and of course, some people are still jerks, but you just keep walking, youre a confident grown up now, you know who you are. and if you really dont want to go, maybe you want to put together a little facebook mini-reunion. we have had a few of those, with the same kind of thing, lots of fun and lots of revelations. i think the things that weigh on peoples minds for years builds up, you know? its just interesting, a new view on things. you have nothing to lose. and if its not going well, you can just leave, no worse for wear. but i think you will be pleasantly surprised.

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L.N.

answers from New York on

i didn't go to my 10th because, well, because i live across the pond. i was not popular but hang out with popular kids. i was the geek who was the best of the best in everything. i would have loved to go, not because i had strong ties to any of them but because i was a part of that high school too.
i say bring your husband and go, have a good time. at least it will be a night out for both of you.

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G.

answers from Minneapolis on

If I were you I would go- I was not popular in school,but I went to my 25th
(WHICH WAS COMBINED WITH MY SISTER'S CLASS THE FOLLOWING YR) I was surprised by how may of the popular snobby people back then came up & talked to me. I'm not a drinker not smoker, but I had a nice time.
Teens do grow up when they are faced with real life experiences. I found the upity crowd was not snobby anymore. You'll never know unless you go.
Good Luck!!!!!!!!!

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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

Well, let's face it, kids in high school are pretty stupid, especially when they try to impress each other. I don't attend my reunions and don't really speak to too many old time friends. One is now my sister-in-law and we rarely talk, not even comment on FB. I see some of the others at family get togethers, as we have nieces and nephews in common, but other than that, we really don't stay in contact at this point.

I agree with the others, why go, if you had nothing in common with them back then. Do you feel it would be of importance to you?

I have photographed a few of reunions. The HS reunions seem to still be cliquish and the one 40 year frat college reunion they all seemed to keep in touch with one another and really did enjoy each other.

Unless you have a good reason to go, like you would like to visit with a number of your girlfriends, I would not go. Chances are you are not going to rekindle any old relationships there.

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