Anyone Else Have a Child with a "Mild Delay'?

Hey M.,

My son is eight months old and at the last pedi apt I asked if he should be talking yet. The pedi look at me weird and I knew that was bad. y son seems to behind in quite a few things. He isn't crawling, which I know not every baby at this age is, but he also makes no syllable sounds. He also can not hold a bottle or sippy cup and can not feed him self anything small. He doesn't like to look at one person for too long and gets frustrated very easy. When he was born via c-section he did not breath for the first seven minutes. I worried, but they told me he was fine. Until now I did not know he was behind because I never mentioned anything to the pedi. Since finding out he was a little behind the curve a lot of other moms have helped me with information. There is a state program that is free. They will send out a form with questions and then set up an appointment to assess your child. They have a program if your child is in need. Let me know if you would like more information on this.

Kimberley

M.,

I totally agree with many of the other messages and especially with the advise Laura gave you. I too live in/near your area and Alta Regional Center helped our family tremdendously. Don't let the neuro just give you a dx without some testing first. IMO the insurence company's physical therapy is not the same as the private PT that Alta will pay for.....the wait lists can be long so don't hesitate and start the process today!
J.

Hi M. ... my child is 2 now and he was also born scheduled c section... he was also very quiet, and didn't crawl till 10 almost 11 months... and didn't walk till 18 months, i took him to a couple of therapy sessions and they gave him special shoes... that didnt work... Doctor said he will do it when hes ready... i guess what i am trying to say is that every child is different i cannt compare him to my daughter who is 8 and did everything on time. Just be patient and pray... God knows whats best for our kids and will have our children do what they do when they do it... God Bless C. - Ca.

Our son is 6 months old and we just got from the neurologist. We had an unscheduled csection. we had our son evaluated for lazy eye, he is ok. he has a naval hernia and we were then informed a couple of months ago that his head was larger than the norm. We went through a whole host of consultations and tests.... Surgery was highly likely. We just found out on Monday from the neurologist that he does not have to have surgery but does need to be monitored every 3 months. Our son does not roll over nor sit up and the docs seem to be okay with this. Both my husband and I are insured, so we go thru Kaiser as it is most affordable and then go thru my insurance for a second opinion. Our non-Kaiser pediatrician is the BEST.....I would recommend getting a second opinion.......as when i read your childs description, it sounds pretty normal to me.......

I just joined this group and was reading through a few postings. I feel compelled to reply to you. From what you have said I would say your child is "normal". We get so worried about what is normal it is so frustrating to a parent. I have two kids 6 and 3.5 so it's been a while since they were babies but I thought 4 months was just right for head control. As for rolling over my "advanced" 6 year old never did roll over and hated laying on his tummy too. My friend Jane's eldest daughter, now a normal 9 year old didn't crawl til she was 14 months old. Stop stressing enjoy your baby and realise we are all so different and in a few years you'll probably wonder why you were ever concerned.

Hi M., My oldest daughter (now almost 5) had strep B at birth, she was in the NICU for 10days. She also had a hard time breathing. She seemed to be healthy and happy, so weird side effects until at about 3 years we noticed she was spacing out. Her eyes would fixate and she would not respond to us (even if I snapped my finger in her face) when we asked her if she heard us she would say yes and when we asked her why she did not answer she said I dont know. At first it was once in a while then it became more frequent. We took her to her Ped and they scheduled an EEG. 3 hours later we found out that she has Primary Generalized Epilepsy. she is now taking Depikote and never has them. It will be a year in August that we found out.

Has your baby had an EEG? I hope that my story does not scare you and only helps. Both of our children had problems breathing after they were born C-Section. Something to ask the Dr about. Good Luck. M.

Hi M.. I have six kids with special needs, so I have definitely experienced these delays before. I see that you are in Roseville (so am I) so I will give you the phone number of someplace to get things going even before you see the neurologist. The Placer Infant Program ###-###-#### is an early intervnetion service that provides physical therapy, occupational therapy, speech and vision therapy (at no cost to you). They do the services in your home so you don't have to go anywhere. Call them and tell them your pediatrician said your daughter is delayed and you need an assessment done. They will schedule for someone to come out to the house to start the process.

When you see the neurologist, ask him if your daughter needs a referral to Alta California Regional Center. Alta is another early intervention service but their requirements are greater than the Placer Infant Program. If the neurologist thinks she should be covered by Alta, then contact them immediately since the initial process takes awhile. Alta can provide music therapy, respite for you, and equipment that is sometimes needed that medical insurance will not cover.

Since I'm in Roseville too, if you need ideas and help or just someone to talk to, let me know.

L.

Perfect advice! Great doctor! Get her to a neurologist and get her the help she needs. You are on the right track!!! My son had issues that we saw right away. Our doctor told us to wait until he was 3 years old. Well, he had and has major issues and we lost LOTS of time that we could never regain to help him. It's so sad that he could be doing lots better if we had had a good doctor who was on top of things. (He's 19 years old now.)Good luck !

Hi M.
Try www.help-with-learning.com. Marilee Coots is a nuerodevelopmetalist that works with midly delayed to the extremely delayed/handicapped children. As your pediatrician suggested your baby girl's brain needs stimulation, Marilee shows you how to do that. I hope this helps.
I was once where you are. I needed answers and had to go the long route to get them. God bless you on your journey. J.

I would suggest moving her limbs in a crawling fashion. You would manually lift up her right arm and left leg at the same time. Then the opposite. This is called cross-crawl. Also move your hand in an infinity sign from one hemisphere of her brain to the other. You are using the magnetics of your energy system to re-establish her energy pattern that somehow got scrambled during the procedure. For lungs, I would have you gently massage the area in front of the shoulder where the arm attaches to the trunk just below the collarbone. It may be tender and she may not like it, but keeping up with it may help prevent her from serious issues in later years.

I would definitely suggest a few Reiki or Quantum Touch sessions for her. These sessions are completely non-invasive and extremely effective. I've seen cancer disappear, kidney stones and bone spurs dissolve, diabetes and rheumatoid arthritis be relieved, moving bones into place and even change shape. The body is extremely intelligent and takes the energy provided to do what ever it needs. I'm in Sacramento and could provide sessions for you. ###-###-####
Love, L.

I have a bi-polar son, doing quite well.
A nephew who didn't walk until 2 and talk until 4, he's a successful banker, high up at a bank in Calistoga, a fun guy, a great dad & has a gorgeous wife in every sense of the word. I am not trying to make lite of your situation, but I think it really sounds like a MILD DELAY.
I have suffered much w/ my son (suicidal at 4), but he functions pretty well now at 17, he appears normal, tho accepting the fact that he never will READ or do math, etc. (4 severe learning disabilities---sequencing and symbols) has been another process.
When I talk with parents who have children who have died young, are facing terminal illness, have severe autism, I really work on being grateful.
I also have a high functioning down's syndrome nephew.
I WOULD KEEP EXPLORING, FOR YOU, FOR YOUR DAUGHTER, but I think the doctor is probably accurate that with a little help she will be fine.
It's great mother's with concerns that could change the world (every child truly wanted, truly cared for.)
Hang in there M., you and your beautiful girl will be/are WONDERFUL!
This is to you M., and to every parent of a "special needs child". I have a "normal 11" year old, and even when we complain--she is very stubborn, it is incredible to have a child with a brain/ and or body that works well.
my very best to you both, with love,

S. Jan (Hornstein)

Hi M.,
I'm not sure how similar this is, but my son was born 11 weeks early, so he was offered several developmental assessments in his first three years. They went by his adjusted age, which means his age calculated based on his due date, not his birth date, i.e., they considered him 52 weeks when he was actually 63 weeks. At his 18 month check, the developmental experts assessed him as being delayed in gross motor skill development, and they did not call it a minor delay. He sat and stood at relatively typical times, but he was a bit slow to walk and couldn't run, jump, balance well on a soft mat, etc. They suggested we take him to some type of Gymboree-esque environment to work on these skills. We did drop in playtimes at the JCC SF. The doctors also suggested we send him to a preschool that started at age two so that he would be spurred on by watching other kids do things (he has no siblings and was not in day care). Now he is 4.5 years and one of the most athletic kids in his class. He is strong and coordinated. He absolutely caught up, and he was considered delayed for his adjusted age. He also had an oral motor skill delay (fine with talking, but could not/would not eat semi-solid or solid foods). The only solids he like had strong flavors, such as smoked salmon and brussel sprouts. Apparently his brain needed a strong taste to signal that there was food in his mouth and a job to do. We took him to a developmental clinic at CPMC in SF that focused on eating. The Ocupational Therapists and other staff helped a great deal. A large part of what we had to do was stimulate his brain to understand that he had molars right before feeding him. We also had to help him strengthen his cheek muscles. He was very delayed in this area and is fine now.
Best to you,
K.

Hi -
Your story sounds very similar to my son's. My son is now 3, so I don't remember all the mile stones. But we too were referred to a neurologist and then physical therapy. I wanted to tell you about the physical therapy. We went to Sierra Pediatric Therapy Clinic in Granite Bay, and my son made tremendous gains with them. He is still "delayed", but is a fairly normal toddler. Also you should consider contacting ALTA Regional Center. It is a company that will evaluate and provide services for infants (under the age of 3) who need them. My son received a year and a half of physical therapy and also music therapy with no cost to us! Now that he has turned 3, it is a different story, but I'll spare you the details of that for later.
Feel free to contact me if you have more questions. I know this is a confusing time - especially if you are a first time mom.
Good Luck.

T.
____@____.com

Please visit the San Andreas Regional Center website
http://www.sarc.org/earlystart.html to learn about the Early Start Program for which your daughter may qualify. You can call the San Andreas Early Start unit at 800-404-5900. San Andreas Regional Center is a community-based, private nonprofit corporation funded by the State of California to serve people with developmental disabilities as required by the Lanterman Developmental Disabilities Act. The delays you describe in your posting should be assessed by the neurologist --he/she may refer you to San Andreas and the Early Start program. If the neurologist does not make a referral, please get in touch with San Andreas yourself to have your daughter evaluated. If your daughter's delays qualify her for early intervention services from San Andreas, you will want to get her into the appropriate programs as soon as possible.

She needs to be stimulated as much as possible. The rolling over is not important. The important thing is that she is crawling on her tummy which will progress to creeping on her knees which progresses to walking. She must go through these stages to organize her brain. If she is not crawling on her stomach she might benefit from patterning to teach her how to crawl and even put her on a slighly slanted board so if she does move she goes forward to teach her how it feels to move forward. Get the book, "What To Do For YOur Brain-injured Child" by Dr. Glenn Doman. The more intelligent you make her the more she will want to move and the more she moves the more intelligent she will be. Put signs all over the house in big letters naming things like chair, table, etc. Show her flash card (large letters)with names of family etc, and put any kind of flash cards in categories such as kinds of dogs, etc. and show her pictures. Keep her on the floor all the time on her tummy so she can learn to move. Don't let her roll over as that is detrimental to her moving forward. Write to me if you want to ask questions and I will give you my phone number if that would be helpful. K.

Our younger son was delayed in both speech and movement. He was born 6-1/2 weeks early, was very floppy, late in crawling and sitting up, and didn't walk until he was fully 18 mos. old (oh my aching back!). As he approached his second birthday, it was clear that he wasn't about to start talking either. We worried terribly, and had him evaluated through a local program that covers all the bases, including neurological. They recommended intervention for the speech delay, and a wait & see approach on motor development. He made steady, if slow, progress, and is now a fully normal 6 year old. He talks a blue streak, is learning to read, and plays Little League. Maybe we needn't have worried, but I don't think his speech would be as good as it is without the extra support. My advice would be don't worry too much, but don't ignore the situation either. Get any evaluations and therapies your doctor recommends. If there's a problem, early intervention really can make all the difference. Best to you and your little love bug!

I'm a social worker and see this with a lot of the kids I work with. I work in california, and there are programs dedicated to providing what is called "early intervention" services to children and families in your position. In our county this means a "teacher" will come to your home weekly to work on developmental excerises with the child, and show you things you can do, it may also involve visiting a physical therapist once a week, and eventually small play groups with other children. Many of the children I work with are all caught up developmentally by age three or before. It sounds like you are on the right track. It is amazing to see how resilient children can be.

We've experienced the some similar things with our daughter, who's now 2. She didn't crawl until 10 months, or walk until 19 months, and she's just now starting to really string words together. We did some physical therapy with her about the time she turned 1, and it helped some, but just a lot of attention and playing has seemed to make the most difference. What has actually helped the most is putting her in situations where she can interact with children her own age; she started holding her head at 3 months, the same week we started taking her to a children's gym. And she is now starting to really talk a lot, since I've started caring for a friends little boy, who talks almost constantly.
Your daughter may always do things in her own time, as our's has done, and our new pediatrician has advised us there's nothing wrong with that. He gave me some advice that I think is some of the best I've ever received as a parent, and that's not to compare my child to other people's children. Some kids love to "perform" and others, like my daughter, don't. When she decided to crawl, walk or any other milestone, she just got up one day and did it.
Good luck, and I'm sure all will be fine.

Hi M., I have a 3 year old who was born with Down Syndrome, she is very "high functioning". Pretty much everything has been delayed for her. At 2/3 months old a therapist came to my home, and worked her muscles building them up. Early intervention, work with her yourself (baby situps), every little bit helps. Don't be afraid of hurting her. Vitamins and good food have been a plus for us.
Even if it is temporary you might seek outside help through your insurance company/community services. If you are not already in contact with someone contact childrens services for your county. They will steer you in the right direction. Thoughts and prayers go with you.

My child has significant delays and it has changed our lives--your child sounds like she is making progress and that is fantastic! I am relieved to hear that you have a smart doctor! Take your precious little one to an equally good neurologist ASAP, and get her started on therapy for that stimulation, which will help her tremendously. I don't know which state you live in; here in California we have CCS (Calif Childrens Services) and many other resources, but check out what's available in you state to help you help her. My heartfelt support goes to you all.

My daughter is 9 months and is still working on complete head control. She was also born via scheduled C section. She most probably has Cortical visual impairment. She will look at people, but not really focus on them most of the time. She's been rolling over for about a month now, but like your daughter, is not even close to sitting up. We have already been through the battery of tests in Pediatric Opthamology and pediatric neurology (she had an MRI at the beginning of December) She is just starting to make consonant sounds, and will always grab fingers, but rarely will she hold on to something you place in her hand. She does not explore and grab things at all.

I have been in contact with:

1) "Blind Babies" (for babies with ANY type of visual impairment)
2) "The Regional Center"
3) "CCS" (California Children's Services)

These three agencies provide assistance and stimulation and can get you on track with Physical Therapy and Occupational Therapy (yes, PT...AND...OT - trust me, it's important.)

What the neurologist said happened was that as her fetal brain developed, a type of brain matter that is supposed to develop in the center of the brain, then migrate outward, did not migrate to where it was supposed to be.

Basically, there are "two" types of brain matter. White and Gray. They both have specific sections they are supposed to occupy in the brain. My daughter has some Gray Matter where White Matter is supposed to be. This affects her Motor and Visual Cortexes.

**********

EDIT:

DO NOT let doctors / well-meaning family and/or friends try to advise you against agressive, early intervention. The earlier you help your daughter, the better off she will be.

I knew my daughter needed help by two months old. Her doctor said wait at least 6 months before trying to see if she was delayed. We didn't want to lose four months where she could possibly be getting help though, so we took her to Children's Hospital, Oakland. The doctors at assured us we did the right thing in trusting ourselves, because no one knows your child better than you do.

Hi M.,

I have a 6 year old son who has high-functioning autism. He wasn't diagnosed until he was three and a half years old - too old for the intensive in home (and free) therapy that you could qualify for thru North Bay Regional Center. I am in no way implying that your child might have autism, but I truely urge you to see that neurologist as soon as you can. If something is wrong, and I pray that is not the case, you will want to get as much early intervention as possible. Many pediatricians are still not trained enough to really pick up the signs of autism and other neurological problems, so seeing a neurologist is going to be a major help. If you are still in question, call North Bay Regional Center (in Napa) and request an evaluation. They will send a case worker over and set up the evaluation, but it could take 3 - 4 months to get an appt. Good luck.

J.

M.

The brain is the most incredible and mysterious part of our
bodies, the most important is that you have to stimulate it
as much as possible play a lot with your child, show her the
toys, images in books, talk to her a lot even if you think that she is not understanding all of this, the brain is processing and please be patient and do not get involved with the system until you are totally certain that your child really needs it, they label your child and once is done is impossible to remove it.

I have a child that had similar problems, he turned out to be very intelligent, unfortunately was placed in special school and affected a lot his self esteem.

HI M.,

I just wanted to encourage you today. I am a foster mom and you may know that foster babies sometimes have several issues at once. Well the good news is that even with more severe delays, the excercise that neurologists will often prescribe, if implemented and adhered to, can work wonders as at this very young age a brain can even be trained to use other parts totally normally. I have seen it with my own eyes!! So be encouraged.

P. Varga

My son was delayed as an infant too, and what was first diagnosed as "Mild Low Muscle tone" and delayed gross moter skills at 11 months, was later at 4 diagnosed with Cerebral Palsey. He is now 6.5 just starting to speak in 3 word sentances, and is not potty trianed, is also considered Mentally Retarted somewhat. He is in full inclusion Kindergarten with a full time Aid. I am not telling you this to scare you, I knew another little baby who was EXACTLY like my son at 1 year, could barely crawl, didn't walk till nearly two, she's like 4 today and totally normal. Every child is different, but being through what I have been through, if you were one of my friends, I would tell you, don't wait, get your child evaluated by your local early start, SELPA or North Bay regional center. You'll get AWESOME free services and they will come to your house. Also wanted to let you know, the neurologist, did scans and looked at him, but ultimatly did nothing for my son. Nothing showed up on the scans, and it was a developmental Ped who diagnosed with CP.

Good Luck!
Love,
W.

My son is now 24 and very inteligent, He was labled autistic,and sids for the 1st five years ,slow feeder.let her crawl,longer. work with her evey chance you get find baby exercises you can do with her. read and talk to her, find different foods, all these thing will help her brain be stimulated and crawling for the longest period of time,will help develope her fine motor skills. I did all these things and my son graduated with a 3.8 gpa from high school.he now is top of his class in culinary arts school.She will only be slow if you do nothing

Hi M. - We have a daughter who is now 8, but also was born scheduled c-section, with no complications at birth, but quick to notice strabisms. Her aunt has a lazy eye. With all the eye surgerys and patching and glasses we went through her developement stages were always a bit delayed. We started her at 6 months with an Occupational Therapist to work on fine motor skills and large motor skills. At 2 Emmy had mild seizures - and put her on medication to control them - she then fell farther behind as the med. slowed the brain function down. Needless to say - we still do OT and some speech therapy through our school - which have all been great helps. She is one happy, beautiful girl who reads and spells above the average in her class but still has her struggles. We are thankfully off the meds since she was 3 1/2 and have been slowly catching up ever since. I would suggest seeing the neurologist and starting some sort of OT program - they offer one here in Napa through Childrens Resourse center. It was a great experience. They even came to our house when Emmy was really small. If you have any other questions, reach out, this can be very stressful - I know! Hang in there. ____@____.com